Fashionably Hotter Than Hell: Book Six, The Hot Damned Series (21 page)

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Authors: Robyn Peterman

Tags: #Paranormal Romance, #Romantic Comedy

BOOK: Fashionably Hotter Than Hell: Book Six, The Hot Damned Series
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“Never assume, Vlad,” Raquel replied evenly as she stared him down. “Makes an ass out of you and me… but mostly you in this case.”

 

The laughter was somewhat restrained, but it came from both sides. However, the Old Guard was not amused.

 

“Well, hot damn,” Pam yelled and clapped her hands like she was at a concert. “This is more

 

like it. I’ve fallen asleep over here at least eighteen fucking times listening to Roberto yack on about how to kill a naughty immortal. You’re looking lovely, Raquel.”

 

“Thank you, Pam. Purple suits you,” Raquel replied.

 

A smattering of Angels chuckled at the veiled insult on their hue-less attire, but most just appeared bored.

 

“We shall adjourn,” the head Angel, Roberto, told the King. “Please feel free to join us back here for an informal gathering.”

 

“We’d be delighted.” The King nodded as he took Pam’s arm and politely shook hands with Roberto.

 

“After a brief recess to freshen up, please join us in the great room,” Roberto announced to the crowd who began to disperse.

 

Surrounded by Old Guard, Vlad approached Raquel and brusquely took her arm. My instinct was to kill, but that would make me wildly unpopular and most likely get me removed from the Summit and sent straight to Hell. Literally.

 

He was just as I remembered—long black hair with eyes to match. His cheekbones were sharp and his perpetually downturned lips were thin. He stood about an inch shorter than me and fancied himself a ladies’ man. Although any lady who chose to be wooed by
Dracula
—a name he despised—would have to be mighty forgiving to overlook his penchant for
impaling
people… no pun intended.

 

With colossal difficulty, I reined in my inclination and behaved like a proper guard was expected to—for the most part.

 

One could argue I was slightly too close, but on the off chance Vlad tried to abduct her I was staying near enough to grab her. Of course, Raquel could give Vlad a violent run for his money, but my caveman tendencies would not be denied.

 

Fuck. This was harder than fighting the Trolls and Wraiths. I tilted my head down to hide my fangs. A sign of aggression wouldn’t do.

 

“Raquel my sweetling, it’s so good to see you. You’re as ravishing as ever,” Vlad complimented her.

 

“And you’re as inappropriate as I remembered,” she replied as she expertly extricated herself from his grip.

 

“Don’t be mean, Raquel,” he said with a pout on his lips. “I was so hoping our paths would cross.”

 

“Why?” she asked.

 

“To reminisce about
old
times and make some beautiful
new
memories together,” Vlad said, implying a past where he’d seen my mate naked.

 

Not working for me.

 

At all.

 

I was very aware it was hypocritical to judge Raquel’s past. I had quite a past of my own. We were centuries old and a very sexual race. However, I was a newly mated man. I was seconds away from coming apart at the seams and going medieval on Dracula’s ass—right or wrong. The tension in my body was impossible to overlook.

 

“Your guard’s a bit over zealous, isn’t he?” Vlad inquired in a condescending tone. “Is that you, Heathcliff? Interesting… I see you’ve been demoted.”

 

His laugh made me grind my fangs and the casual and bored smile that I gave him deserved an Oscar.

 

“Correct, Drac… I mean Vlad. I owed my Prince a favor and he asked me to protect his sister. Far be it from me to go against orders,” I replied easily. “Speaking of orders, I believe it’s time for you to retire, Raquel.”

 

Her glance was surprised, but she nodded curtly. “Yes. I think I will. It’s been a long day. Vlad, please excuse us.”

 

“I’d like some time with you tomorrow,” he insisted as his eyes bored holes in me. “Alone.”

 

“No can do, old man,” I told him with a grin and a small bow. “You know… orders and all.”

 

With that, I took a shocked Raquel by the arm and led her quickly away. Five more seconds and I would have destroyed him. This guard thing was not working out very well for me. Hiding the fact she was mine was eating me alive.

 

“He doesn’t know the curse is broken,” I told her tightly as I led her from the room. “Let’s keep it that way.”

 

“Are you sure that’s why you’re manhandling me out of the reception?” she demanded.

 

“Yes. No. Just walk before I throw you over my shoulder and carry you out.”

 

“You’re being an alpha-hole,” Raquel hissed as she smiled politely and waved at attendees.

 

Ignoring her accurate assessment, I marched her past them as quickly as decorum would allow. I knew I was being very un-guard like, but I was losing it fast.

 

“We should convene,” the King whispered as he stepped in front of me halting our exit.

 

“At my home outside of Paris, father,” Raquel told him as she gave him a quick hug. “Heathcliff is having a few boundary issues with our game of pretend. We should probably go.”

 

“Yes, I can see that,” the King replied biting back his mirth. “We’ll go to the reception and meet you in an hour.”

 

“Yes, Your Majesty. We’ll be waiting,” I said with as much respect as I could muster.

 

I was loyal to and adored my King. However, he was in my way at the moment and very little could stop me from leaving the room with his daughter. My frustration was clearly evident as the King stepped aside and let us pass.

 

“Rude much?” Raquel snapped as I guided her back to the foyer.

 

“Losing it here,” I admitted tersely as I pulled her into an alcove and wrapped my arms tightly around her. “You ready to leave?”

 

“We’re transporting?” she asked. Her brows were raised and she tried unsuccessfully to wiggle from my grasp. “I thought maybe we could fly and you could work off a little of your macho caveman bullshit.”

 

“Nope. Flying takes too long and I’m fond of my macho caveman bullshit,” I shot back flatly. “Again. Are you ready?”

 

The look she threw my way would have withered a lesser man. I was not a lesser man and unfortunately it just made my dick hard. This did not go unnoticed by my mate.

 

“You realize you’re crazy, don’t you?” she accused.

 

“Tell me something I don’t know,” I hissed. “You’re the one who makes me crazy.”

 

“Back at you,” she bit out.

 

“We can have this conversation where we can be heard or we can go back to your palace. Your call, Princess,” I said.

 

“This is going to be a very long eternity,” she muttered. “You’re a pain in my ass.”

 

“And thank God you have a very nice one,” I complimented her and grinned at her disgusted snort of laughter.

 

“Leave,” she instructed. “Now.”

 

We did just that in a blast of multicolored sparkling glitter.

 

Raquel was correct in her prediction. It would be a long wonderful, aggravating, challenging, somewhat violent, loving, and sex filled eternity.

 

I couldn’t wait.

 

Chapter 18

 

“You have some nerve getting pissed off about my past,” Raquel shouted as she picked up a priceless antique and prepared to hurl it at my head. She eyed the crystal figurine critically and at the last minute thought better of it.

 

My weight was distributed evenly between both feet. I was ready to dodge either left or right depending on what breakable object might be hurled my way.

 

“I know it’s not reasonable,” I ground out. “It’s hypocritical. However, it might have been helpful to know you’d slept with the fucker.”

 

“How, pray tell, would that have been helpful to you? Because I will tell you now, I
do not
want lists of the women you’ve bedded over the last few hundred years,” she snapped and casually eased herself over to a collection of brass statues.

 

Her eyes blazed green and her fangs dropped. She was ready for a smackdown and all I wanted to do was strip her naked and bend her over the couch. It was hotter than Hell, but her obvious jealousy is what made the problem in my pants exquisitely painful.

 

I kept my eyes trained on her hands. She was fast and had outstanding aim. I was no one’s fool.

 

“Fine,” I growled. “I’ll admit my behavior isn’t rational. But if he lays a hand on you again, he’ll have to regrow a new one.”

 

“You cannot be my guard,” she said wearily and flopped down on a sleek leather couch. “If we have to
pretend
not to be mated, I’ll need Jean Paul to be my keeper. You can’t handle this. Vlad clearly has more information than we thought. He knows of the curse.”

 

“Speaking of Jean Paul,” I said slowly knowing my popularity was about to take another nosedive. “He has to be the one who revealed the secret. No one in your family would ever do such a thing.”

 

It did occur to me that there was one family member that could be a potential loose cannon, but I was fixated on the image of her sleeping with Jean Paul. Rational thinking had left my repertoire for the moment.

 

“Never,” she insisted vehemently. “He would
never
do that.”

 

“I’m going to ask this next question once,” I said, absolutely sure she would throw something. “You will answer it and I will do my best to block said answer from my brain.”

 

Her silence was stony and her stare was furious. It was wrong of me to ask, but I had to know.

 

“Have you slept with Jean Paul?”

 

The brass candelabra narrowly missed my head. It whistled as it flew by and smashed a priceless lamp on a side table.

 

“I will not grace that with an answer,” she yelled as she picked up something shiny and cocked her arm back.

 

“You already did,” I retorted angrily.

 

“I most certainly did not.”

 

The shiny piece exploded into a million little shards it hit the wall mere inches from my face. Even though I was ready to go ballistic at the thought of Raquel and Jean Paul, I realized how much I was enjoying our exchange of old. At least we weren’t destroying someone else’s home this time.

 

“Just tell me it’s over,” I said in what I thought was a reasonable tone.

 

“Do you really think I would have mated with you if I was involved with someone else?” she asked in a tone so quiet I got scared for my undead life.

 

“Well… I didn’t say you were sleeping with him
now
. I meant… like ever.”

 

“Your regard for my morals is sadly lacking and makes me wonder about yours,” she hissed.

 

“You still haven’t answered the question,” I challenged, fairly sure I should stop while I was still alive. However, my inner alpha-hole had a mind of his own and wouldn’t be denied. My damn mouth kept moving as if I was possessed by the Devil. If only I had that as my excuse.

 

“Get this through your thick and stupid skull before I break it in half,” she stated, incensed. “My sexual past is not your concern. You will never ask me that question again.”

 

“It’s a legit question,” Jean Paul commented calmly from the doorway. “I’m fine if you want to tell him the truth.”

 

“He doesn’t deserve the truth,” Raquel spat and pulled a short dagger from her inner thigh.

 

Seeing him standing so comfortably in her home was almost my undoing. I knew this impasse was my fault entirely. Goddamn it, messy was going to be a way of life for us if I made it through the next few minutes. My mate and a sharp dagger didn’t bode well for me.

 

“No,” I said with a decisiveness that belied how I actually felt. “Raquel is right. It’s not my business. Not now—not
ever
. Although if you ever even think about her like that again, I’ll kill you.”

 

It was the best I could do under the circumstances. I was possessive and greedy and wanted every part of Raquel to myself, but if I didn’t cave a little it would be a brutal uphill battle to build a future together. I was smart enough to know that. The last two hundred years I’d been only half-alive without her. I would not fuck it up by being jealous over something in her past. I probably had more conquests than she did anyway.

 

Their laughter caught me off guard. I watched with my fists balled at my sides. Jean Paul took his place on the couch beside my mate as if he belonged there. Raquel’s giggle floated across the room like music and simply infuriated me.

 

It dawned on me that I was being played, but for the life of me I couldn’t figure out how.

 

“It’s really not nice to toy with him like this,” Jean Paul told her in his fucking debonair French accent. “He will find a way to repay you.”

 

“Ugggghhhh,” Raquel grunted as she watched me warily. “I don’t like his tone or his insinuations.”

 

“Hmmm…” Jean Paul stroked his chin and feigned deep thought.

 

I seriously wanted to rip his head off.

 

“His tone is that of a newly mated Vampyre,” he assured Raquel. “And I would surmise if the tables were turned, you would have been a Hell of a lot more unpleasant.”

 

“That’s not true,” she snapped and punched his arm. “Take that back right now.”

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