Falling to Pieces (7 page)

Within a couple of hours after Joe left, I’d finally gotten myself somewhat together. And while I loved Neely Kate and Violet, I needed to be alone. All their hovering was making me claustrophobic.

My cell phone rang in the kitchen, and my heart lurched, the possibility of who might be on the other end catching my breath. Was it Joe? Had he called to tell me he’d changed his mind? But I couldn’t make myself get up to answer it, scared my wavering hope would be defeated.

Neely Kate cast a wary glance at me before she went into the kitchen, returning to the doorway with the still-ringing cell in her hand. “It’s Mason.”

I sighed, trying not to cry with disappointment. With all the trauma of the morning, I’d forgotten I still had to go to the police department. “He’s probably calling to tell me when to go give my statement.”

Neely Kate answered. “Hey, Mason. It’s Neely Kate.” She paused and pointed to the phone with raised eyebrows.

I shook my head.

“She’s busy at the moment. Can I take a message?” She kept her gaze on me while she listened for several seconds. “Okay, I’ll bring her down at one.” Her eyes widened. “
Where’s Joe
?” She looked at me with raised eyebrows, wanting me to provide an answer to the question Mason must have asked.

I shook my head. I couldn’t deal with answering more questions at the moment.

“Joe went back to El Dorado,” Neely Kate said then cringed as Mason responded. “No, that’s okay. I don’t mind bringing her.” She paused again. “Okay. I’ll tell her.” She hung up and leaned her head against the doorjamb. “Mason’s going to bring you home. I couldn’t think of any reason why he couldn’t.”

“That’s okay.” I sighed. “Thank you.”

“You know he’s going to find out sooner rather than later. He’s going to take one look at you this afternoon and figure out that something’s wrong.”

“I know, but I’ll deal with it then.” I was about to cry again. “I need a shower or a bath. I’m still gross from last night.”

Violet jumped up. “That’s a good idea. A nice long bath is just what you need. I’ll get it started for you.”

“Thanks, Vi.” I grabbed her hand and squeezed. “Why don’t you go back to the nursery? I’m better now and there’s nothing you can do, especially since I have to go to the police station. I’ll call you after I give my statement.”

Her mouth twisted in indecision. “I can come and sit with you.”

The last thing Violet needed was to hear the horrific details of my kidnapping and almost murder. “I’ll probably have to be alone when I talk to the police. Or Mason will be with me. I’ll be fine.”

She hesitated. “Okay, but why don’t you come spend the night at my house tonight? Just like old times.”

I nodded. “Sure.” Old times. The last time I’d spent the night with Violet was months ago after we’d found out that Momma wasn’t my birthmother. But before Momma’s murder—and before Joe—I used to spend at least one night a week at her house in an attempt to escape Momma’s vicious tongue. “I’d like that.”

She offered me a tight smile and rubbed my arm. “Good. It’s settled. I’ll pack a bag for you and bring it to the nursery. Neely Kate will take you to the station and Mason can bring you to the nursery when you’re done. If you don’t feel like hanging around, we can close early today.”

I nodded.

She disappeared into the bathroom, and I heard the water start to run.

“Can I get you anything?” Neely Kate asked, still standing in the doorway. “Are you hungry or thirsty?”

“No, just tired.”

“If you want, you can take a nap after your bath. I’ll wake you up in time to go to the station.”

“Don’t you need to get back to work?”

She made a face. “Nah. Tiffany’s got it under control. If I go back to work, I’ll just worry about you.”

“I’m fine now,” I said, wiping my face. “See? I’m not sobbing uncontrollably anymore.”

“You’re still in shock, Rose. When this happened to me, I didn’t want to be alone for days.”

I teared up again but tried to smile. “Someone broke up with
you
? How stupid was
that guy
?”

“As stupid as Joe, apparently. But it obviously turned out to be a good thing for Ronnie.”

I couldn’t hold back my tears, and she pulled me into a hug. I hated that people were going to think so badly of Joe, especially when he did this to protect me and Violet. If it were just me, I’d take on his parents. I’d go to Mason and tell him everything and let him put Joe’s parents in their place. But I couldn’t risk exposing Violet. Even if she was the one to put herself in this position.

Neely Kate pulled back and looked into my eyes. “It’s going to be okay, Rose. I promise. It’s gonna hurt like hell for a bit, but you’re gonna be okay.”

I shook my head, trying to catch my breath. “My life is nothing without him. If it weren’t for Joe, I’d still be scared of my own shadow.”

Neely Kate scrunched her face in disgust. “Please, girl. Give yourself some credit. Sure, Joe helped encourage you and pushed you in a few directions you needed to go, but
you
were the one who started breaking out of your shell and becoming the person you are right now.” She smiled, tears filling her eyes. “And you’ve only just started growing.”

I leaned my cheek on her shoulder, still crying.

“I know right now it hurts like a railroad tie was shot through your gut, but you’ll get through this and be happy again. I promise. Look at me. That other boy broke my heart but now I’m married to Ronnie, and I’ve never been happier.”

I couldn’t imagine how I could be happy again. I couldn’t imagine any kind of life without Joe. The thought of trying ripped my wound open wide.

Violet emerged from the bathroom and pulled me away from Neely Kate. “Come on, Rose. Let’s get you in the bath.”

The water was still running into the tub, but the room was full of steam. Violet had put a fluffy towel on the closed toilet seat and hung my robe on a hook on the back of the closet door. She leaned over and turned off the water.

“I made it nice and hot, just like you like it so go ahead and get in. I’ve put a washrag on the side, along with some of that lavender soap you love.”

“Thank you, Violet.” My voice broke.

She grabbed the uninjured left side of my face. “It’s gonna be okay, one day at a time, Rose. One minute at time if you have to. And I’ll be here every step of the way. I won’t let you go through this alone.”

“Thanks.”

Alone. That was my biggest fear. I’d lived most of my life feeling alone, ostracized from everyone and everything. Now that I’d had a taste of belonging to someone, I didn’t want to go back to that loneliness again.

She closed the door and I stripped off Joe’s shirt, the scent of him still lingering in the cotton. I started to cry again as I took off my shorts and stepped into the tub, sliding down into the bath. The warm, almost too hot, water soothed my aching muscles, but my head still throbbed from my stitches and my crying. I grabbed the washrag and cleaned the right side of my head as best I could without getting my stitches wet. When I finished, I leaned back, resting my neck on the folded towel Violet had left for me.

Logically, I knew I’d get over this. People broke up with each other every day and you didn’t see them falling down and dying of unhappiness. But unhappiness didn’t kill you that way. It was a slow malignancy that stole your hope. You didn’t fall over dead, you faded away into nothingness.

I closed my eyes and thought about Joe. He was hurting too. He hadn’t wanted to break up with me. I saw how much it killed him to walk out my door. How was he coping, especially when he had to go back to his campaign? At least I had people who loved me and would help me through this. Joe had no one.

I must have dozed off, because a soft rap on the door startled me.

The door opened a crack and Neely Kate’s voice floated through the opening. “Rose?” She paused. “You’ve been in there a long time. Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” I answered, but my voice sounded groggy.

“You’ve got about an hour before we have to leave. Do you want to get out and lie down for a little bit?”

I closed my eyes with a sigh. Life went on even when I didn’t feel like moving on with it. “I’ll be out in a minute.”

“I know you weren’t hungry, but I made you some lunch.”

“Okay.”

The door shut and I climbed out of the now cold water, my muscles aching in protest. I dried off and put on my robe before going into my bedroom. When I reached for my underwear drawer, the partially open drawer that I’d given Joe for his things made me draw in my breath. I pulled it open staring into the empty space.

He was really gone.

I pulled off Joe’s ring and studied the diamonds. They weren’t very big, and I suspected Joe could afford bigger, but he knew that I didn’t wear gaudy things. The simpler the better. Tears filled my eyes, blurring the stones. Everything I’d been dreaming of the last few months was gone. Completely sucked away. Without Joe, what was left? I knew I was being shortsighted, but at that moment, I didn’t care. I didn’t want to think of a life without him.

But Joe was right, as hard as it was to admit. I would be miserable if I tried to live up to his parents’ expectations. I tried to live up to Momma’s and look how well that had turned out. The problem with attempting to live up to other people’s expectations was that you were destined to fail before you even began. I had failed Momma and I would have failed Joe’s parents too. Then I would have lost him anyway. I couldn’t forget there was more at stake here. I couldn’t risk hurting Violet.

There was no way to fix this.

With a sob, I dropped the ring into the empty drawer and pushed it shut. I’d only known Joe four months out of my twenty-four years. I
would
get over this. Eventually.

After I put on a pair of jeans and T-shirt, I found Neely Kate in the kitchen. “There wasn’t much in your cabinets, but I found some soup. Besides, my grandma says nothing warms a broken heart like a hot bowl of soup.”

I smiled up at her through a fresh batch of tears. “Thanks.”

She placed a bowl in front of me as I sat down. She slid into the chair Joe sat in when he broke my heart and I blinked back tears. Would everything in my house remind me of him? When I added all the days I’d known him, he’d been here less than half of the time. So why was he so much a part of this house? So deeply embedded in my heart.

Neely Kate’s gaze moved to my ring-less left hand, but she remained silent.

I could only get about half the bowl down before my stomach cramped, and I pushed the soup away. “I’m going to finish getting ready.”

“Okay.”

But when I stared at my reflection in the mirror, I realized putting on makeup was pointless. The right side of my face was bruised, and my eyes were swollen and bloodshot from crying. My hair was still dirty, despite my attempt to get the matted blood out. I was never going to look presentable. The Henryetta police were going to have to deal with looking at me.

On the way to the station, Neely Kate bantered on and on about her sister and her grandma, purposely avoiding anything that had to do with Ronnie. When she pulled into the lot, she turned off the engine and turned to me. “Are you sure you’re okay with Mason taking you to the nursery? He’s bound to ask questions about why you’re so upset.”

Why was I so worried about Mason finding out? I sighed. “He’s going to notice that I’ve been crying, and I’ll tell him. He’s my friend so there’s nothing for me to worry about. It’s silly to
not
tell him.” I smiled at her. “I just don’t feel like answering a lot of questions, but it’ll be fine.”

“You can always call me if you change your mind. I’ll come back and get you.”

And I knew she would. She’d drop everything to help me. I leaned over and hugged her. “Thank you. I promise, if I need you, I’ll call.”

She walked inside the police station with me, and the anxiety I felt anytime I had to deal with the police crept up my spine. I took a deep breath as we entered the front door, telling myself that I had nothing to worry about. I hadn’t done anything wrong. But the chaos and emotional upheaval of the morning only added to my anxiety.

After I checked in with the receptionist, she called Detective Taylor. He came up front, pausing in the doorway with a grim smile. “Come on back and I’ll take your statement.”

Neely Kate squeezed my hand before she left, and I followed the detective into the same room I’d given my statement after Jimmy DeWade had tried to strangle me months ago. I’d been worried about what the police would do with my statement, but I’d had Mason and Joe with me. A fresh pang of anxiety hit me as I looked around the room. This time I was alone.

“Where’s Mason?” I asked as Taylor shut the door. “I thought he was going to be here.”

He sat down, his face expressionless as he watched me. “He’s running late so we’re gonna start without him.”

“I’d rather wait for Mason.”

He crossed his legs and rested his forearm on the table. “How is it that you’re so friendly with the assistant DA?”

I may have been upset about Joe, but Taylor’s attitude lit a fire in my chest. “I don’t see how my personal life is any of your business.”

“It seems that your personal life is what got you in the position you’re in right now.”

“What exactly is
that
supposed to mean?”

His eyebrows rose. “You tell me.”

I’d had a craptastic morning, and I refused to deal with this too. I stood. “I think we’re done.”

He leaned forward, anger darting from his eyes. “We’re far from done, Ms. Gardner, so I suggest you sit down.”

I moved to the end of the table, my hand on my hip. “Am I being held against my will?”

“Not at the moment.”

I walked across the room and reached for the doorknob. “When Mason shows up, I’ll give my statement. Until then, I’m gonna wait out in the lobby.” I pulled the door open ready to storm out, but came face to face with Mason, nearly bumping into him.

He grabbed my arm, his eyes wide with surprise. “Rose, are you leaving already?”