Falling Stars (14 page)

There
was a jab at my back. I ignored it. Then I felt it again, only harder and
painful. Flipping around in my seat, I wanted to slap him.

"What
the hell?"

There
was that fucking smirk. Christ, I hated it. I just want to slap the damn viper
piercings out of his cocky face. He tossed his notepad into my lap.

"Are
you serious?" He put his head back and closed his eyes. "You woke me
up just for this?! We haven't touched this damn song in a week and now you want
to work on it."

He
turned his head and glared.

"Just
look at the damn song Ryder!" He spit.

Huffing,
I grabbed the notebook, looking it over closely. He'd written out the lyrics
with the music. I had to read it twice to make sure I saw it right the first
time. I looked to him slowly.

"You're
splitting the lyrics?"

He
nodded.

"I'm
supposed to sing this?"

He
nodded again, his brow still in its constant crinkled furrow. It looked really
good and he actually took some of my notes into consideration. Throwing the
notebook back into his lap, I rolled back over.

"So?"

"So
what?" I groaned without rolling back to him.

"I'm
going to arrange for you to record your part while we're in Seattle."
Before I could even respond to his demand, he was out of the seat and almost to
the back of the plane. Huffing again, I slammed myself back into the seat. He
is so infuriating.

Waking
up in a overcast Seattle day in May was a welcomed familiarity. Stepping off
the plane, I inhaled deeply and raised my face to let the cool misty air wash
over me.

"Come
on," Laney grabbed my arm.

"Where
are we going?"

"We're
getting our asses to the hotel so we can get ready to go out tonight." She
looked back at me beaming. I rolled my eyes.

Once
in our room Laney attacked each one of us with hair product, make-up, and then
shoved clothes in our arms. Una met up with us for dinner. We discussed the
plan for tomorrow at the studio.

After
our dinner, we headed to a nightclub. The music was thumping loudly. The
assistant club manager escorted us to the VIP area. It was a fun night. We got
to let loose for a few hours until we were ready to collapse.

It
took all the strength we had left to drag our asses to our room. Each of us
headed to our own room to shower away the make-up, hair products, and sweat.
When I stepped out of the shower, I slid on a pair of cotton pajama bottoms and
a tank top. Walking out of the bathroom, loud voices came from outside my room.
When I went to investigate the disturbance, I ran into Laney standing with our suite
door open. She was staring down the hall. Serena appeared next to me.

"What
the hell is going on?"

With
a shrug, we started to walk over to Laney. Laney's face scared me.

"Laney
what's –?" A yell from down the hall cut off my question. Leaning into the
hallway, I saw she was staring at a crowd formed.

"Christopher,
please let us in!" Jackson pounded on the room door.

Stepping
around Laney into the hall, two men in hotel uniforms ran by me. I started
toward the door with Laney and Serena at my heels.

"What
in the world is going on?" Serena used a hushed tone.

They
were both look at me for an answer.

"How
would I know?" I shrugged.

Jackson
started banging on the door again when the hotel worker slid a card key in the
slot. Nicholas was next to Jackson with fear and worry plaguing his handsome
ace. My eyes fixed on Kat standing next to Jimmy. He had his arm around her. Her
face filled with concern. Walking over to her, Una pushed by us and stood next
to Nicholas. Her lips were moving, but I couldn't make out what she was saying.
He shook his head without looking away from the door.

"Kat,
what –"

Suddenly
the door opened. Nicholas and Jackson rushed in with Una holding the door open.
Kat grabbed my hand.

"Mia,
I'm so glad you're not on that bus anymore."

"What
happened?" Still in shock from the scene unfolding around me, I couldn't
take my eyes from the door. It was like a car wreck you couldn't help but watch
the aftermath.

"All
I know, is Stacia ran to Una upset after leaving Christopher tonight. Then he
started destroying his room, screaming and wouldn't let anyone in." My
attention pulled from Kat when I heard Jackson and Nicholas pleading loudly
with Christopher.

Moving
closer toward the room, Kat tightened her grasp on my hand. Turning, I smiled
at her. With a squeeze to her hand, I pulled away from her grasp. The draw was
strong, like an invisible line hooked to me. Taking a deep breath to clear my
head, I found the courage to enter into the room.

"Mia,
No," Laney yelled from behind the crowd.

Una
turned around and looked at me. Panic flooded her typically calm and collected
face.

"Mia,
you need to get back to your room, please."

I
shook my head.

"Mia,
it's not safe."

There
was a loud crash. We both jumped and looked in the direction of the noise.
While Una was distracted, I took my opportunity. Moving quickly by her, she
tried to grab my arm.

"Mia,"
she hissed.

Stopping
just inside the room I took in the sight before me. The room was demolished.
The TV was smashed, the couch flipped over, the mirrors shattered, and there
were holes in some of the walls. Slowly, I stepped into the bedroom. A
paramedic was standing next to Nicholas, both of them trying to coax a
distraught and injured Christopher.

The
sight of Christopher was devastating. Sitting against an open closet door,
knees pulled to his chest with his arms wrapped around them and his head
buried.

"Christopher,"
Jackson whispered and moved to touch him.

"Get
the fuck away. Get out!" Jackson almost got close enough to touch him.

 Flinching
from Christopher's outburst, fear set in. What the hell I was doing? The desire
to flee coursed through my body, but the lure of Christopher dissipated my run
instinct. Christopher slammed his head back against the door with a torn look
on his face.

My
heart ached for him.

 "Get
out! All of you!" Burying his head again, his hands tightened on his legs.

Blood
dripped from his hands from where he'd punched the mirrors and maybe even the
TV. His knuckles already swollen and definitely turning a purplish-black, but
the worst of it all was the deep slashes on the back his hands.

Jackson
stumbled back and bumped into me. He quickly turned and grabbed my shoulders as
I took my first step toward Chris.

"Mia,
you need to get out of here." He urged me to leave.

Out
of the corner of my eye, Nicholas's head snapped over at the sound of my name.
Next thing I knew Nicholas was next to Jackson putting his hand on his
shoulder.

"Let
her go."

"But
you don't know what he –" Nicholas gave him a look and simply said.

"Let
her go, Jackson." He let me go.

Looking
back over to Christopher, my heart thudded from the adrenalin. Swallowing all
my fear and apprehension, I grabbed onto the invisible pull and stepped
forward.

"I
said to go away!"

I
jumped when he screamed.

"Christopher,"
My whisper was shaky. He raised his head and looked at me, rage burning in his
eyes.

Terror
began to cut at me. I was wrong. I can't do this. He's going to launch himself
at me. I shrunk back. Then his rage melted into something else. Guilt.

"Christopher?"
Kneeling down three feet before him, I tried to keep my voice calm. His
expression went blank and he stared blankly. He was lost and something deep
inside me longed to find him.

There
was movement behind me. Without taking my eyes from Christopher's, I put my
hand out behind me.

"Don't!"
The movement stopped.

Christopher's
brow furrowed and he dropped his head back into his folded arms.

Inching
closer I didn't say anything else. Finally close enough I could reach him, the
fact that he could now reach me had also registered with the part of me
fighting for self-preservation. My instinct screamed again for me to run, but
the draw was too strong. Bracing myself for the possibility of an attack, I
stretched out my arm...

Unclenching
my fist, I placed my trembling hand on the top of his head. Immediately the
tension melted from his shoulders. Quietly I released a breath, relieved he
didn't pummel me.

Slowly
I stood up to move closer, but he misunderstood my movement. Fumbling to his
knees in front of me, he wrapped his arms around my legs and placed his head
against my stomach. Impulsively I pulled my hands up on both sides until I knew
what his next move would be.

Christopher's
arm stretched out, his fingers wrapping around my wrist, placing my hand back on
his head. I brought the other hand down to join. A loud gasp slipped from my
lips when he locked his arms around me, lifting me up.

"Nicholas,"
Jackson hissed in the background.

"Stay
still." He hissed back.

Christopher
moved us across the room. Afraid Jackson was going to get in the middle of this
I shot him a look telling him to stay back. Nicholas was holding Jackson in
place. Relief washed through me. I had no idea what would happen if they tried
to pull me away from Christopher.

Christopher
lay us down on the bed, burying his face in my side. He relaxed, but could
still feel some tension in his body.

"What
the hell?" Jackson whispered.

"I
don't know," Nicholas responded "But it worked regardless." He
sighed heavily.

"Nicholas…"
Una whispered. "What are we going to do?"

"I'm
not sure yet." The pain and stress in Nicholas's words were heart
wrenching.

Lying
there with Christopher holding me like a stuffed animal, I tried to ignore the
fact everyone one in the room was watching us. I knew they were analyzing
everything, trying to make sense of it all. Hell, I'd been trying to figure it
out since the first night.

Then
the paramedic appeared.

Chapter
Nine

El
Paso had been a great way to end the concert streak. Nicholas pulled me aside
after the concert to discuss what happened this morning with Mia and me, as
well as talking about getting me professional help. I know what his idea of
help is.  We've tried it before. It never worked. He ended the 'get help'
conversation with one last statement.

"She
won't be on tour with you forever Christopher." He patted my back and
walked away, leaving me to think. Out of the entire conversation, that was the
one sentence on repeat in my head over and over again.

Arriving
that night on the bus, I wondered if this morning would be the last straw for
her, but she was there. Following my now familiar nightly routine, I showered,
picked up Mia, fell asleep next to her, and left before she woke. She never
said anything or complained, so I didn't stop.

Being
the last person on the plane to Seattle, I scanned the cabin. Mia was in one of
the middle seats. Choosing to sit in the back, we were in the air when my
fidgeting started. Grabbing my notebook, I went to where she was sleeping. Even
buried in an oversized sweatshirt, I could've told you exactly where her waist
curved upward to her hip. Evidently, I needed to get laid once we got to
Seattle.

Jabbing
her with my pen to wake her, she growled her displeasure. We talked and
bickered about the song. Telling her I would set up time for her to record her
part when we got to Seattle, I left before she could say a word about it.
Smirking I knew she would hate me telling her what to do.

Returning
to the back of the plane, Nicolas' words filtered into my mind.
She won't be
on tour with you forever
. Anxiety started gnawing at my gut.
What did I
plan on doing now that we were no longer sharing a bus? Were my newly restful
nights a thing of the past?

When
the plane landed in Seattle, everyone started to exit. Walking down the stairs,
I caught sight of Mia removing the hood of her sweatshirt and raising her face
to the Seattle mist. A look of relief and relaxation painted her natural face. The
little one, Laney, interrupted my musings. She ran up and dragging her off,
smiling like a crazy woman.

We
arrived quickly to the hotel and I went straight up to my room, agreeing to
meet the guys for dinner later. A few hours and a shower later I was sitting in
the restaurant at the hotel with the guys and some other crewmembers.

Someone
rubbed his or her foot up my leg and toward my thigh. Looking across the table
from me, I saw Stacia, groupie extraordinaire, smiling seductively. I gave a
knowing look, remembering my evident needs.