Falling - On the Banks of Lake Saint Clare (Falling - Book One) (53 page)

“I am so sorry you went through your life not knowing the truth. You were happy, happier than any child I knew.

“Alex, I have always wanted you. Don’t ever think that you weren’t wanted.”

Chapter
31

“Court is now in session, the Honorable Judge Kevin Donald presiding,” the clerk said.

I saw Brad look over at me. The Judge walked in and sat down. Michael’s leg was bouncing nervously and he reached for my hand and squeezed it.

Judge Donald said,
“In the matter of the
 
State vs. Andrews,
 
Mr. Andrews, I understand you
would like to change your plea of not guilty to guilty in accordance to the plea agreement with the state
?”

“Yes, your honor,” Brad’s lawyer nodded.

 
“Counsel, have you reached a settlement?”

District Attorney,
Matt
Myers stood up,
 
“Yes, your Honor. The people have agreed to 6 years incarceration, with six months suspended, as long as Mr. Andrews completes an approved anger management course.”

“Mr. Andrews, do you know that by pleading guilty you lose the right to a jury trial?” The judge asked.

“Yes, your Honor.”

“Do you give up that right?” Judge Donald asked.

“Yes, Your Honor.”

 
“Do you understand what giving up that right means?”

“Yes.” Brad answered.

I was so nervous, confused and actually felt sorry for him. I had no idea why I felt any empathy for him. I hated him, but yet for some reason, I was sad that we were there. I kept looking at him, feeling my eyes burning.

“Do you know that you are waiving the right to cross-examine your accuser?” the judge asked.

“Yes.”

“Do you know that you are waiving your privilege against self-incrimination?”

“Yes,” Brad answered.

“Did anyone force you into accepting this settlement?”

He didn’t answer. Brad looked at me, almost pleading with his eyes to help him. I could feel Michael’s leg bouncing faster. I kept waiting for Brad to answer. But he just kept looking at me. My chest was hurting from my heart pounding so hard.

The judge repeated, “Did anyone force you into accepting this settlement?”

I looked down. I couldn’t stand looking at him any longer.

“No,” he finally answered.

“Are you pleading guilty because you in fact struck the victim without legal provocation?”

Brad’s lawyer stood up, “Mr. Andrews would like to take the Alfred plea.”

“What’s that mean?’ I asked, Adam Phillips. He was the assistant to the prosecuting attorney.

He leaned over and whispered, “Alfred plea is where the defendant does not admit that he did anything wrong, but he feels the evidence may convict him. You won’t hear him admit to what he did to you.” 

“That’s not fair. Now he can say he didn’t do it but plead guilty because he’s such a sweetheart.”

He nodded.

I sighed and shook my head, “How come he always wins.”

“He hasn’t won. You still get the last word. And
six
years is a long time. He won’t get out till he’s
at least twenty one
.”

I looked
a few seats
behind Brad and saw Rachel and my dad. I couldn’t believe th
ey were sitting on his side
. Rachel was texting. Are you serious?
I thought. “The love of your life is going to prison for
six
years and you aren’t as upset about it as I am?
Didn’t they break up? Why is she here?
I felt my phone vibrate and realized she was texting me.

Rachel: Hope you’re happy. Your little lie is putting an innocent boy in prison. Hope all the attention you are getting is worth it, Bitch.

I shook my head and looked at her. She raised her eyebrows and smiled coldly at me. I realized that I hated her more than I hated Brad.

I felt Michael’s hand squeeze mine, “You okay?”
             
“Yeah, why?”
             
“Just didn’t know how you would feel after your real mother spoke.”

I looked up and realized that Brad’s mom had been speaking.

“I wasn’t listening. How could I have not been listening? What did she say?”

“Brad’s
a good boy
. Always there for her, blah, blah blah. Typical Mom shit.”

“Did she mention me?” I asked, wondering why she would and why I would care, but I did.

He shook his head.

“Why did she go up there?”
             
His lawyer requested character witnesses on Brad’s behalf. Apparently
,
to make him look more like an angel before he gets locked-up.
He’s still going to get 6 years regardless of what wonderful things they have to say.”

“Of course,” I sighed, “Wouldn’t expect anything else but for the court to think he needs to be on a pedestal.”

“You don’t have to sit through this if you don’t want,” Michael said, watching my dad go up to the podium.

“I’m fine. He is such a loser.”

I sat there listening to my dad say how wonderful Brad was. He had been his baseball coach for over ten years. Was very respectful, showed great promise in life. Was a community leader, honor student, volunteered numerous hours a week to the county youth center.

“If he were running for president, I’d vote for him after that speech,” I whispered. “How dare he do that to me. He is making it look like I am putting Muther Teresa in prison.”

Michael half smiled.

Dad continued, “Brad always had to leave right after games or practices to help tend to his paraplegic father, but in all the years, he never once complained.”

“Paraplegic father?” I asked Micha
el. “He doesn’t have a father.
What’s he talking about?”

Michael held up a finger to show he wanted to hear.

“Brad’s father was struck by a drunk driver while he was on a traffic stop. Brad took over being the leader of the house, since his Dad was partially paralyzed.”

“He doesn’t have a dad,” I said way too loud. I started feeling dizzy and I could feel my eyes burning. “Michael,” I whispered, “what am I doing?
Please
tell me he’s lying about his father.”

“Brad
want
ed
to follow in his father’s footsteps by being a police officer after he
completed
college, but due to this episode, his dream will be put on hold or worse, it might not be able to happen at all. It’s very unfortunate that we have a promising young man that is a fine example of teenager be so severely punished. I know the reason Brad is pleading guilty
,
and so does his so-called victim. We know the truth.”

“Call a recess,” I said to Mr. Phillips. “Just call a recess. I know you can do it.
My friends watch Law and Order all the freaking time. I know you can do it.
Just call it.” I started shaking and crying. I had to get out of the room. I had to leave. “I don’t want to do this anymore. I want to go home.”

“I’ll try,” he said. He leaned forward and started whispering to the Prosecuting Attorney.

He turned around and looked at me. “Don’t let it bother you. I told you this might not be easy.”

“Call a recess or tell them it’s over. Either way,” I said, feeling my side start hurting. I could feel Michael
’
s hand squeeze mine harder. My head was starting to spin. “I need some water.” I bent over, trying to get my act together. I just wanted to leave. “Do it, please,” I raised up, pleading with him.

“Court will be in recess till one,” I heard the judge announce.

“Ok, we have an hour,” Mr. Phillips said. “Let’s go in the office so we can talk in quiet. You okay?”

“I’m not sure,” I said, still feeling dizzy and knew there was no way I could stand up at that moment.

I looked at Brad. He actually looked like he was concerned as he watched me. Dad and Rachel were huddled in the corner, looking like he was plotting against me as they looked over at me simultaneously. I looked in the back of the courthouse and saw a man in a wheel chair that looked exactly like Brad. 

“I’m going home,” I said. “Michael, take me home, please. That’s my father over there. I need to leave. I can’t do this to him.”

“No Alex,” he said, “I am not letting you quit. You don’t owe them anything. You have wanted to win and I am not going to let you walk out. You have to be strong.”

We walked into the office behind the courtroom. Mr. Phillips pulled out a chair for me. 

“Thanks. I am so sorry to waste your time, but I really can’t do this. It’s too much. I thought it was going to be easy, but it’s not. Can we just tell the judge I made a
big
mistake and go home?”

Mr. Phillips opened his briefcase and started laying pictures out on the table. One was a naked girl lying on her side, a huge open gash on her head and blood completely cover
ing
her face
,
chest,
and thighs. I thought I was going to throw-up. My body went completely cold and I felt like I was about to pass out, as I kept looking at an obviously dead girl. I had never seen so much blood in my life.

The next picture was her on a stretcher. The white sheet under her was red from all the blood. It was the worst thing I have ever seen in my life. I closed my eyes and pushed them away, not wanting to see them anymore. He pushed another one in front of me, “Look Alex,” he said, showing me a picture of the girl on a respirator. “Is she dead?” I asked, feeling tears running down my face.

“That’s you,” Michael said.

“No, it’s not,” I said, reaching for the stack of pictures. I started looking through them, each one just as disturbing as the last. I looked at the first one again, then closed my eyes, trying to get the image out of my head. I looked at Michael seeing by the look on his face that it was as much of a nightmare to him as it was to me. He was in the alley. I remembered his voice. I looked at the first picture again and knew that was when he saw me, begging me to fight. He sat down in the chair beside me and took my hand. He was shaking as he looked at the picture in front of me. “Do this for me?”
H
e asked. “I will fight every battle for you for the rest of your life, but fight this battle for me this one time. Ok?”

I nodded, feeling his hand touch my cheek. 

I walked up to the podium and looked at Brad. I took a deep breath.

“When I look at you
,
Brad, I see how strong you are. You have the strength that not many eighteen year olds have. I’ve read articles in the newspapers about how you are a powerful football player. I’ve read so many times the word powerhouse when they talk about you. I know I have read it at least 100 times. I was proud to know you when I saw the headline Powerhouse Andrews sets state record. I thought how cool that he is my friend and is so gifted. Colleges are seeking this strength, Brad. I remember my friend telling me one day,
he could crush someone he’s so strong.

“The thing is, Brad, I am stronger than you. Isn’t that ironic, that you have all these muscles and strength and power, but yet, I am stronger than you? I survived. You tried to rape me, but you were too weak. You tried to kill me, but you were too weak. You tried to make me go crazy, but you were too weak.

“I can take off my shirt and no one can tell you did anything to me. You didn’t leave me any scars or a trophy of your attack. You can’t say the same thing, Brad. I left proof that you will have for the rest of your life of how weak you are. You will go through life people asking what happened to your back and you will see my face. Will you admit that a 4 foot eleven inch girl fought you while you were trying to rape her and she won? Are you strong enough or man enough to admit that?

“Don’t think you are doing me any favors by pleading guilty. I know you are guilty and what you did to me. I don’t care who doesn’t believe it was you. Because the only people that matter know you did it. You know you did it.

“You played a mental game with me trying to make me crazy. You are a dangerous person. But yet again, you lost. The only thing you can brag about doing to me is making me have nightmares for the rest of my life. If that is winning in your eyes, then feel very proud of yourself. You will be my nightmare forever. That is the only thing out of this that you won. They refer to me as a victim, but you
Brad
,
are the victim
,
because you will always be a victim of yourself.”

The judge called a
fifteen-minute
recess. “Oh man, I have no idea what I said up there. Was I a complete
goof
?”