Fallen Angels (8 page)

I still wanted her at a distance with Chloe so young. This night was for me, my own way of taking all of her control over my life and thoughts away. It was my turn to be in control. She wanted to hold me like she used to, but I couldn’t let that happen; sliding out of bed I dressed quickly then collected her clothes, tossing them on the bed for her. She gave me an odd look. “You have to go. Chloe will be up soon,” I informed her.

Ravyn sat up, staring at me in confusion. “What? I thought—”

“You thought that a night of incredible sex would make everything better? Did you really think I would forget how you left me, and the fact that you want Chloe dead? I’m not the weak little Kara that you can control with a kiss anymore. I am a strong, loving mother, and Chloe will always come first. Last night wasn’t about you. I needed you to understand how much it hurts to be used. That’s all you ever did, was use me,” I said, with a strength and confidence Ravyn had never witnessed from me. I also realized how much truth there was in my final sentence. 

“Kara, that’s not true. I came here for you,” she pleaded.

“I don’t care why you came here, Ravyn! All I did was wait for you to come back to me, and you refused time after time. I want you here. I really do, but you have to earn the right to stay here. You lost my trust the moment you jumped off that goddamn roof. So don’t for one second think you can just waltz back into my life after denying my existence all this time. If you really want me back in your life you have to prove it. You have to earn my trust, and you have to accept Chloe for who and what she is. Until then I don’t want you anywhere near her.” I almost enjoyed seeing the devastation and sadness in her eyes.

“Okay,” she breathed.

Shaking my head, I couldn’t believe that was all she had to say. Was she agreeing with me or telling me what I wanted to hear? “I’m serious, Ravyn. I want you here, but not if it’s going to lead down the same path that takes you away every time. Now, please get dressed, I don’t want Chloe finding you in here,” I whispered softly before exiting the room.

Chapter Seven

Ravyn

The Choices We Make

Jeanie and I were getting along great, in a strictly platonic way, and I had been raking in the cash for both of us by fighting every weekend over the last couple of months. Tonight was the fight I had been waiting for. For the main event I was to fight a demon named Volac, who happened to be Astoroth’s demon son. I knew the crowd wouldn’t have the chance to give him any mercy.

“Ravyn, you have to let the crowd choose. I know what his father did, but you can’t make this personal. This is business and nothing more,” Jeanie reminded me while wrapping the sport tape around my hands in our usual pre-fight ritual.

“Business, right, I won’t do anything to upset you,” I said with a wink.

“Of course not, but don’t underestimate him, Ravyn. Oh, I have a surprise for you when we get home.” She smiled before leaving the room.

I grabbed the short sword and waited for Jeanie to announce my name before striding out to the small dirt ring. Volac was thin but toned, with shaggy black hair and a glint of excitement in his dark chocolate eyes that matched his father’s. I crouched down, running my hand through the dirt and rubbing it over my hands while grinning and giving him a wink. His jaw clenched and his eyes narrowed in anger.

This was my chance to wipe out the last remains of Astoroth’s existence. My eyes closed immediately after my stupid thought. I shook my head; I had nearly forgotten Astoroth’s offspring growing inside of my Kara.

“Fight!” Jeanie shouted.

Opening my eyes I didn’t bother to stand while Volac circled me, waiting for me to strike. I waited, playing with my curiosity about Volac. Would he stab me in the back or fight like his warrior father did? When he came to a stop in front of me I looked up to see him wink at me before I slowly stood with a smile, impressed.

We attacked at the same time, our swords colliding with a thunderous clank. I could see his muscles shaking with effort, trying to push my sword away from his, but I would not let him for one second think he would live through this. I quickly knocked the sword from his hand and used the butt of my sword to batter his face. I knew he was finished when I watched him collapse to the ground, and I quickly approached for the final blow. The crowd was silent when I readied my sword, giving them a small moment to save him, but I heard nothing.

Ravyn!
Kara’s scream suddenly pierced my mind. I dropped the sword and grabbed my head in my hands. It was so loud and endless. Filled with pain, fear, and panic. I couldn’t focus on anything with Kara’s frightened voice echoing in my mind. Was she dying? Or was she being tortured again?

I had to go to her. I had to help her, to make sure she was alive. A sudden growl made me look up, but I only saw a glimpse of steel before it slammed into my shoulder.
This feels familiar
, I thought, then felt another sharp jolt and looked down to see the other short sword sticking out of my chest.
Very familiar
, I thought while my eyes moved from the sword in my chest to the one in my shoulder.

Volac had just recreated the same scene his father had once enacted. How did he know? Was Volac there all along? I couldn’t recall. I didn’t have time; I had to get to Kara. My wicked laughter spilled forth, echoing in the large room. Volac would have to wait. I held my two fingers up asking the crowd for mercy, and they quickly gave it to me. It was my first loss, but one I had to take. I gave Volac a wink while pulling the sword from my shoulder, letting it fall to the dirt ground, then yanked the second sword from my chest, tossing it at his feet before I followed Jeanie to the changing room.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

“I’m fine. I have to go. Kara’s in trouble or something is very wrong. I have to get to her,” I explained frantically while ripping the tape from my hands. I grabbed my fresh shirt and coat, pausing to look at Jeanie’s worried stare.

“Go to her. Let me know if you need anything. Now go,” Jeanie urged, gently pushing me out the door.

I was on a plane within an hour, but it was still too long. I couldn’t stop pacing or tapping my feet. I wanted to call Nebiros or Angela, but I knew they would tell Kara that I called and I couldn’t risk that. All I could do was wait and hope Kara was alive and well. I really hadn’t thought this out when I decided to be so far away.

Finally, I arrived at the place I once called home. I was actually to nervous to go inside, so I lurked in the trees that surrounded the house, watching and listening. Four heartbeats, though one was very faint. There were no signs of panic or worry. Then I heard a tiny cry, and my eyes quickly found the window of my old room. The room was dark, but I could see movement every couple of minutes. Emma’s soft humming silenced the tiny cries. I knew then that the baby had been born. What I didn’t know was if Kara was okay.

I didn’t take my eyes off the window until I saw my father exit the house and make his way toward me. Ducking behind the trees, I waited for him.

“This is not very becoming of you my child. Hiding in the shadows, so she doesn’t see you?” my father said as he stepped into the trees.

“What the fuck are you doing here? Is Kara okay?” I asked.

“I was doing what you could not. Checking on Kara for my fierce daughter.” He chuckled. “Kara is fine. It’s a girl, Chloe Lilith, after your mother and her friend. You should go see her, instead of lurking around out here.” He smiled, and then vanished.

I wanted to see Kara, but I was worried how she would react to my sudden appearance after everything I had said and done. She would think I was here to end her baby’s life, but I just wanted to hold Kara and make up for all the time lost between us. I could be near her now, and the thought alone made me smile.

I skulked in the trees for a few days, only leaving to feed. I had to be sure taking Kara’s blood would not be an option. When I returned that night Kara was standing in the window of my room. She opened the window and sent her thoughts to me. She knew I was here, and she thought I was here to kill her baby.

Kara was the only one swirling in my thoughts; her baby was the last thing on my mind. I had to see her, and I knew when she left the window open, she was inviting me in. I hesitated for a moment, wondering if this was the right thing to do. Why would Kara invite me in if she thought her baby would be in danger?

It was either a test or a trap. Whatever awaited me, I would happily walk into it to see her again. So, without any caution I quickly made my way across the lawn; leaping up to the open window I crawled into my old room. The bathroom light shined brightly, illuminating my room, which appeared to be Kara’s now.

The water in the bathroom was running, and I could smell her. Her delicious, sweet scent had returned to normal. Excited to see her, I rushed into the bathroom a little too fast. What I saw both excited and saddened me. Kara was standing in front of the mirror, naked. She was thin, and surprisingly her body looked nearly the same as I remembered, except for the terrible scars that seemed to glare at me through the mirror.

I knew then that the child had to live, because killing it would only destroy another piece of Kara, and I would never hurt her again. The answer to all of my worries and fears had been right here all this time. Finally, I was seeing so clearly what I had been missing. I was relieved when she let me hold her, unafraid of me and my touch. I never wanted to let her go. I had to stay here. To be close and watch over them both. Kara would always be home to me.

Making love to Kara that night was different; she had to be in control of every move. I was unsure whether it was her rape or if it was her mistrust in me, until I saw the glint of joy in her eyes as she forcefully pinned my arms at my sides. I knew exactly what she was trying to do. She was trying to get my demon to burst from its cage. It was a test, one I knew I could pass with ease.

The harder she pushed to see my monster, the gentler my touch became. It seemed to irritate her that I could have such control, and when I tried to hold her after she was spent, her behavior proved I was right. Her angry words, her pain and disappointment. Kara really thought I had used her? How could she think…My thought abruptly turned into a new question. Had I used Kara?

Slipping out of the house and back to the trees, I couldn’t shake the thought that she was right. What possible reason would I have to use her? Kara was my whole world. I used her as bait, once, no, twice. Those moments didn’t count since I was trying to protect her in the end. Did I use her for her blood? No, Kara willingly offered that to me. Kara’s accusation didn’t make sense. I had never used her for anything other than those two times. I truly loved to be around her, and if that was using her then I was guilty as fuck.

I needed blood; I needed a kill to ease my frustration. I couldn’t very well fly back to Seattle for a fight. I had to stay here at least for the night. I wanted to see Kara again, to talk this out. But that would have to wait, because blood was clouding my mind for the first time in weeks. I had to find a good kill and fast. The only problem was I didn’t have a car and daylight meant I couldn’t fly. The kill would have to be close or it would have to wait. Neither sounded like a good option at the moment.

Hearing a car start in the driveway I turned and ducked. “Abby? What the fuck?” I stood and watched her drive away. I knew she wasn’t going to school, because Kara had been homeschooling her before I died. And why she was driving already was beyond me.

I quickly followed her. Staying in the trees, I watched her pull out of the gated driveway onto the back road. I had to catch her. Running full speed I was able to get ahead of her car before breaking through the tree line. Coming to a stop on the open road, I waited.

Abby didn’t even slow down as she approached. She nearly ran me over. I had to jump out of the way. Only then did she slam on the brakes, bringing the car to a screeching halt. Abby looked at me like she was seeing a ghost when I approached her door. She was thin, but it was her dark eye makeup, lipstick, and skull choker that had my full attention. I motioned to her to roll her window down. She just stared at me, trembling.

“Abby?” I said, reaching for the door handle, but it was locked.

I could see her talking but couldn’t hear a word. “Abby? What are you doing? Let me in.” I said, motioning to the window again.

The window opened a tiny bit. “Ravyn? Is it really you?” Her voice cracked.

“Who the fuck else would it be?”

When the words left my mouth tears began rolling down Abby’s cheeks. She quickly opened the door, trying to get out, but her seatbelt was still buckled. “Fuckin let me out!” she snapped, frantically trying to unbuckle herself. Finally free, she jumped out of the car and hugged me tightly. I could feel her tears falling on my neck while she muttered the same words, “I thought you were gone,” over and over.

“It’s okay, I’m here Abby. I’m here,” I assured her while stroking her hair, soothing her.

After a minute of standing in the street I pulled away to look at her and couldn’t help laughing. She was wearing extremely short jean shorts over black stockings and a torn-up shirt that hung off one shoulder, nearly exposing her one thankfully bra-covered breast. My little Abby was trying desperately to be all grown up. “Sorry, come on, we can’t stand out here. I’ll drive while you fix your raccoon eyes,” I joked, making her grin.

I drove to the diner close to the house, the same one I once took Kara to. We sat in a booth in the smoking section, and to my surprise Abby ordered coffee for both of us. She also tried to grab my pack of cigarettes; when I stopped her she huffed loudly.

“Don’t do that Ravyn. I smoke, you weren’t around to stop me before so please don’t try to now.”

“Fine. What the fuck is going on with you? The makeup, the dirty whore outfit, driving my car?” I asked, pushing my pack of cigarettes across to her after lighting my own.

“Devlin gave me your car after he got me my license. I’m not a little girl anymore, you know that right?”