Fading Away (Hardest Mistakes #1) (7 page)

There’s a loud crash from another part of the building, it sounds like a wall collapsed or something. I sit up as the dogcatcher jumps up from his seat and takes off to investigate. As soon as he’s gone, a shadow opens the main door and creeps up the hallway of cages.

“Kai?” Sam’s voice echoes over the noises from the other dogs. I stand up and yip at her to catch her attention. Her shadowed face appears in front of me, her eyes full of unshed tears. She smiles weakly and unlocks the cage door. Footsteps echo down the other end of the hallway, Sam hears them too and takes off for the front door. We run down the street until the pound is out of sight, then we slow to a walk. Both of us stay quiet until we reach the apartment.

Once we’re inside and the door is closed and locked, Sam kneels down in front of me and wraps her arms around my neck. Her arms are shaking.

“Thank you,” she murmurs into my fur. She pulls back and her fingers brush the burn around my throat from the dog lead I destroyed at her work. I yelp at the sharp pain and jerk backwards. She frowns and lifts my chin to see the tender skin. She ignores me when I try to brush her off and move away. Tears well up in her already glassy eyes. It’s only a small rope burn, no need to get upset over it. She watches me for a moment longer then gets up and shuts herself in the bathroom. I walk up to the closed door and listen to the running water.

CHAPTER 10

Sammy

I step into the shower with my clothes still on. The hot water cascades over me, soaking through the memories of the last few days and scorching the hurt from my skin. Too soon it turns cold. I sit at the base and pull my legs to my chest, the cold water dribbles through my hair and down my face. I ignore the scratch at the door and continue to stare down at the wet tiles. I flinch as Alex’s face flashes across my thoughts. The scratching at the door gets louder. I stay where I am.

Kai

When Sam doesn’t answer I start worrying. I shove my weight against the door as hard as I can. The flimsy door handle gives and snaps open. Sam is sitting, fully clothed, in the base of the shower, the water running over her head and her arms wrapped tightly around her legs. She doesn’t look up as I enter. I push the shower curtain open and gently nudge her shoulder with my nose. She flinches away from me. I whine softly and move closer. Are you okay? God I wish I could talk right now.

Her brown eyes turn and gaze up at me. “Kai?” she sounds surprised to see me, like I haven’t been standing here the entire time. “I’m sorry I took so long. I’ll get out now.” She stands on shaky legs and turns the water off. I pull a towel from the hanger and drop it in front of her. She wraps it around herself and slowly walks out of the bathroom.

Sammy

I catch my reflection as I leave the bathroom. Moving away will be good for me. I head for my bed and curl up on top of the covers, still wrapped in my damp towel and wearing my wet clothes. Kai jumps up on the bed and lies down beside me, his side pressing into my back. I roll over and curl my fingers into the fur on his neck. I feel lost and broken.

***

I sleep in well past noon the next day. When my eyes finally flicker open I’m blinded by the light of the afternoon sun. I’ve already mentioned to Kathy that I want to move out early. College doesn’t start for a while, but I don’t want to stay another moment in this town. Besides, I’ve saved up a fair bit of money from working at the coffee shop over the last few years, I can handle it. I should call Ashlee today and tell her I want to move in after graduation. Kai is still curled up on top of the covers next to me. I nudge him awake and he groans loudly in protest. He stretches and yawns before jumping off the bed and walking out to the kitchen.

I climb out of bed and change out of my itchy clothes. The moving boxes I’ve collected are stacked behind the bookcase, I pull them out and start sorting my belongings. I don’t have as much stuff as I thought; I’m basically done by late afternoon.

I need fresh air. Grabbing my book, I head outside into the backyard to sit at the picnic table. Kai tags along and rolls over under the shade of a tree. It’s peaceful out here. Kathy joins me at the table just as the sun sets.

“Oh darling, what happened to your face?” I’d completely forgotten about the slap in the face Alex gave me yesterday. I gingerly touch my cheek and wince at the sting. “Nothing, I’m fine. I tripped and smacked my face against the counter. Oh, and by the way, I broke the door handle to the bathroom, sorry.”

She nods. “It was getting old anyway, but you need to be more careful, honey.” She glances over at Kai, who’s rolling around like an idiot.

Okay, here goes. “So…I was hoping to move out after graduation, so I can have the summer break before classes start. I’ve found a place to rent with a girl I went to school with.”

Her brow creases and she looks as if she’s about to cry. I know she doesn’t want me to leave, especially not to a city over two hours away. “Oh, so soon? That’s lovely. What’s her name?”

“Ashlee Reynolds.” Kai lifts his head and tilts it to the side. Maybe I should have told him first. Connor screams from inside the house, waking from his nap.

Kathy stands and puts her hand on my shoulder. “You’ll come and see me before you leave.”

“Of course I will.” I stand and pull her into a tight hug. She gives me a watery smile and heads inside. My phone starts buzzing in my pocket. I pull it out and look at the screen—unknown number, must be Ashlee.

“Hi, Sam,” Ashlee chirps down the line.

“Hey, Ashlee. Sorry about the confusing message I left you. I was wondering if I could have a key for the house. You don’t mind if I move in after graduation?”

“Sure, that’s fine, I’ll drop one off this Friday. I’ll text you the address and my parents want to organize a moving truck for you, so let me know when and I’ll get one organized.”

Wow? Really? “That’s very nice of them. Thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome, I have to go. I’ll see you later this week. Bye.” The phone beeps as she hangs up. Kai stares at me from across the yard.

Kai

Sam wakes me with a nudge on the shoulder. The dark bruise on her face makes me wince every time I see it.

“I was going to go to the lake one last time before we leave. Do you want to come?” she asks as she leaves the room.

We stay out at the lake all day. It’s depressing. All it does is remind me that I’m stuck like this for the rest of my life. At sunset, Sam stands up from where we’ve been sitting on the rocks. She looks out across the water and sighs. The fading sunlight catches the ripples on the water, making it look like fire. I’ve never been to the lake just to relax; I’ve only been out here for the parties. Is this really it?

Sammy

A knock on the door startles me from my lounging on the couch. I grumble as I press pause on my movie and open the door. Ashlee smiles, holding up a key.

“Thanks.” I smile, taking the key ring and stepping to the side to place it on the table.

“You’re welcome. What happened to your face?” She walks past me into the apartment and then freezes when she spots Kai. “Well,” she says, interrupting my answer and turning back around. “I’ll leave you to it.” She smiles at me again and walks back down the steps to her car.

I shut the door and sit back on the couch. A moment later Kai hides himself in the bathroom. I try to block out the painful noises. The door slams shut and the shower turns on. When he finally emerges from the bathroom, I switch off the TV and sit up to make room for him on the couch. He just stands there studying me.

I look around the room and back at him, placing my hands together in my lap. He has a mark on his throat from the rope burn and a half-healed bruise on his cheek where Alex hit him. Why is he just standing there? When was the last time he was human…oh. I shift on the couch, suddenly uncomfortable. The last time he was human, he kissed me at the Prom. I need to say something to lift the awkward mood.

“Umm…”

He sighs and sits down beside me, keeping his gaze on the floor. “Sam...” He looks as if he wants to say something else. I bite my lip and wait. I know what’s coming next. “Listen, about Prom night.” Here we go. “It didn’t mean anything—”

“Just stop,” I cut him off and stand, adjusting my shirt nervously. It didn’t mean anything? Harsh. “Don’t worry about trying to explain anything to me.” I’ve heard it all before. Rejection hurts.

“Sam,” he starts, his silver eyes glinting up at me. I shake my head and march into my bedroom, slamming the door behind me. He knocks on the door, but I ignore him and cuddle up to my pillow. This month sucks. Why does everything have to go south?

***

I always imagined my graduation going differently. It hurts a little that my foster parents didn’t have the time to make it. I watch the other kids come down from the podium and into the arms of their loved ones, laughing and shouting with joy.

With my certificate clutched tightly in one hand, I pull the hat from my head and head for my car. I suppose it could be worse.

Kai will never graduate high school.

CHAPTER 11

Kai

A truck horn wakes me from a deep sleep. Sam is already up and walking around the house. A man’s voice sounds from the front door, then the sound of boxes being moved. I trot out to find Sam when the men finish loading the truck. Without a word, she motions for me to hop in the car.

I watch as she leans over the fence to say goodbye to her foster family and then we’re off. The two hour long car ride to Black Pike is impossibly quiet. I can tell she’s still upset with me. What did she expect me to say? I don’t know how to make this better.

Sammy

The house is absolutely gorgeous. Two stories with a fenced yard and huge established trees and the inside only gets better. Two gigantic bedrooms with separate bathrooms, a large kitchen, and dining room. Fully furnished living room with flat screen TV and a covered in deck out the back. No wonder she wanted a roommate, this place is huge.

I pick the smaller of the two rooms and drop my bags. Once the moving guys have finished and left, I wander around the house, exploring. There’s a note taped to the fridge with my name at the top.

Sam,

Hope you’re enjoying our new home. Big bedroom is mine, of course. Fridge is fully stocked. I’ll see you soon.

Ashlee

I think I’m going to like it here. Kai trots past me and heads out the open back door onto the deck. He’s ignoring me. Everything feels awkward between us now. I sigh and walk back up the stairs to my room to unpack.

Kai

I pull my pants on and throw a shirt over my head. It’s been a week since Sam and I moved into Ashlee’s house. I’ve been avoiding her, sleeping on the couch, hiding outside on the deck. She’s caught on and started ignoring me too. I have to fix this.

I find her in the dining room, sitting at the table with her new laptop open in front of her. She doesn’t even look up when I walk into the room.

“If you were at college, what would you be studying?” she asks as I sit down across from her. Her question catches me off guard. I stare at her in surprise.

“I, uh, hadn’t really thought about it.”

She frowns. “Didn’t you get accepted anywhere before your accident?”

That sounds like an insult, I glare at her. “Yes. Harvard, actually, thank you very much. But I hadn’t decided what I wanted to study. I didn’t have a chance to. My life ended, remember?”

“You’re not dead,” she snaps back angrily.

“Feels like it.” I look away, annoyed. She looked hurt when I snapped at her. I mentally slap myself. I’m trying to make peace, not start another fight. Out of the corner of my eye, I see her shake her head and look back down at the laptop screen. She taps the keyboard a little too hard as she types. Great, I’ve made it worse. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to come out like that.”

“Its fine, Kai, I’ve already forgotten about it.” She doesn’t lift her eyes. She’s still mad.

My lip twitches. “Obviously it’s not forgotten.” She glares at me and I shut my mouth. Turning my gaze away from her, I glance around the room. “Engineering.”

“What?” she asks, confused.

“I would have loved to study engineering. My parents would never have approved, they wanted me to be a lawyer or something fancy like that. It doesn’t matter now anyway.”

“It does matter. You’re not going to be like this forever, Kai, and when you beat this, you will need a future, or at least somewhere to start.” She reaches across the table and touches my hand. I look down and she snatches it away.

“There’s no point. I
am
stuck like this and I’m going to live out the rest of my life as a dog.”

“That’s not true.” She sounds so sincere, I almost believe her. Doesn’t change anything, though.

Shaking my head, I stand. “It’s not your problem, anyway.”

“No, it’s not, but no matter how much I dislike you or how you’ve treated me, I’m not going to just stand by and let you give up.” I narrow my eyes, spin around, and stride away. I don’t have to listen to this.

“Walking away doesn’t help anything, Kai,” She calls out after me. I continue up the stairs and into her room. I don’t care if my hour’s up or not. I don’t want to be human right now.

Sammy

I can’t find Kai anywhere when I head off to bed, which isn’t a surprise, I suppose; I haven’t really seen him at all in the last week. I close all the doors and windows and trudge up the stairs to my room. I saw him sleeping on the couch the other night, not sure if Ashlee will approve of that.

He’s still nowhere to be found when I get up in the morning to make myself breakfast. Maybe he’s decided to run away. As I walk past the back door that leads to the deck, I pause and do a double take. Is that Kai? I turn the handle and slide the door open to investigate. He’s not moving. I kneel down beside him and touch his shoulder. He jerks awake and growls at me, I instantly pull my hand back. Is that blood?

“Jesus, Kai, what happened?” He groans and closes his eyes. Reaching out slowly, I cautiously place my hand on his shoulder. When he doesn’t snap at me, I decide it’s safe to move him. I grab his shoulders and try to drag him through the door. He’s so heavy. “Kai, I need help,” I grunt out, pulling on his shoulder again.

He lifts himself up slightly and I quickly push him through the door, where he collapses onto the tiles. I turn and close the door before grabbing the first aid kit from the kitchen. I kneel down beside him again and run my fingers through his fur to find where he’s hurt. My hands come away red from a wound at his throat. I grab a damp cloth and start cleaning his neck. His head lifts suddenly and he snaps his jaws, his sharp teeth catching my arm. I cry out and push myself backwards on the tiles away from him. His silver eyes are unfocused as he stares at me, lips pulled back from his teeth, growling.

“Kai, it’s me, Sammy. It’s okay. You’re okay.” I hold out my hands to placate him. He shakes his head and really looks at me. “See, you’re okay.” I move closer, my hands still held up. He whines at me and tries to limp away as I get closer. I grab him by the fur on his shoulders and drag him back down to the floor. “It’s fine, Kai. You’re safe, I promise.” My fingers curl into his thick brown fur as his breathing slows and he calms down.

“Where have you been?” I ask quietly as I reach for the cloth again. He whines and turns his head away from me.

He’s fallen asleep by the time I finish cleaning the deep jagged cuts around his neck and chest. The scratch on my arm has stopped bleeding so I wipe it clean and wrap it in a thin bandage before packing up the first aid kit. I try to move Kai further into the house, but I wasn’t joking, he’s heavy. I leave him on the tiles and throw a blanket over him.

I check on Kai through the day but he doesn’t move until early the next morning. He looks weak as he stands on shaky legs and walks very slowly up the stairs. Curious, I follow, turning the corner into my bedroom to find him already curled up in the middle of my bed.

I re-clean his injuries again that night and he doesn’t wake. Can dogs get a fever? Maybe I should take him to the vet. If I take him to the vet, will they take blood and work out that he’s different? I contemplate my options as I walk back to the kitchen to start dinner, plugging my iPod into the TV stereo on my way to grab ingredients out of the fridge.