Evan's Addiction (54 page)

     “Twice?” I asked.

     “I tried changing how I was for the families I lived with…” She
blew out a breath. “But after the fifth one I realized it was all a waste of
time. No one cared.”

     My chest pinched at the idea of her trying to be this good little
girl in anticipation that someone would keep her. It was a depressing thought;
thinking of child Shaw repressing herself for the hope of acceptance and love.
She should have received them unreservedly.

     “What were the other families like that you lived with; did they
hurt you in any way?” I asked restlessly. I wanted to hear about her life, even
though I knew it was probably going to piss me off.

     Her finger went back to outlining my tattoo. I did my own tracing
on the soft skin of her back. “Some were hands on with punishments; spankings
and a slap upside the head here and there, but nothing that left a bruise. I
had more of a problem with some of the other foster kids.”

     My mom had smacked my ass a few times, but the thought of her
getting spanked by random people who had no affection for her had my muscles
twitching. “What did the other kids do to you?”

     “Some of the kids came from violent homes and I think picked up
that behavior. Shoving and pinching were common. We didn’t have anything but
what the foster home felt like giving us, and some kids would become very
territorial over what little they did have. One kid punched me a few times when
I wouldn’t hand over things he thought should be his; a pillow, notebook,
pencils, crayons, stupid stuff that we could have shared. That was the home
where I first learned to ride a skateboard, and after he arrived anytime he saw
me on it he would take it from me. When I told him we could take turns he just
shoved me to the ground and skated off. I learned to take it some place he
couldn’t find me. I’ve always wondered if kids like that would have been
different if they had loving homes, or if they were bullies from birth.”        

     Anger and sorrow battled inside me on her behalf, but she wouldn’t
want or need my pity. “I’ve always thought that nurture was more fundamental to
how people act then nature. We all have different characteristics and some
people are more aggressive than others. Some parents feed it, but if taught how
to manage it then I believe bullying would be greatly diminished, and of course
showing the child love and affection alongside that is paramount. However,
there are certain people that have that iron will that won’t let them become
part of that vicious generational circle of violence; won’t let themselves be
defined by the life they were forced to grow-up in.” I kissed the top of her
head; letting her know that approbation was for her.

     Shaw nuzzled her face into my chest and silence settled between us
for a moment before she spoke. “You know, I am glad you weren’t a dick to…that
girl. You aren’t that guy, and I wouldn’t want you to be.”

     I stroked her back. “If I’d known what was going through that head
of yours I would have snubbed her without a qualm.”    

     “Really?” Her breath puffed over me.

     “Positively.” I assured her in utter certainty. 

     She inhaled and exhaled heavily and another small silence fell
over us. I was thinking of beginning our second round when Shaw broke the hush.

     “Is sex different with different people?”

     My brows rose and I peered down at the top of her head. Shaw
normally got irritated when my past relationships came up, like what had just
happened tonight with Heaven, but her tone only sounded curious. A lot of girls
had thrown out hints, wanting to know if they were the best I’d ever had, and
I’d always made sure to stroke their egos and give them reassurances that they
were great. However, Shaw would be the first woman I could honestly say was the
best I’d ever had. But I didn’t think she was hinting for that reassurance.

     “Are you talking about a rating system?” I asked.

     “God no.” She exclaimed hurriedly, and then sighed. “Well, not
exactly. Just…okay…maybe kind of like that.” She mumbled in displeasure. 

     I grinned. “Yes, it’s different with different people. The main
thing is the levels of chemistry people have with each other; some are weaker,
some are stronger.” And some are off the charts.

     Was this general curiosity, or was she wondering about us? 

     “So, size
doesn’t
matter?”

     I didn’t miss the hint of amusement in her tone under the genuine
inquisitiveness. Cupping her ass I flexed my cock that was still nestled in her
tight, wet core. “Let’s just say that knowing what to do with what you have is
more important.” My self-control was nearly completely shot. 

     Shaw inhaled and clenched, and I grunted in pleasure. “So,
experience matters, right?”

     Wait…was she wondering about us, or was she gathering information
for a list of requirements for the next guy? This line of questioning suddenly
wasn’t amusing any longer. The idea of Shaw having sex with anyone but me was
not a notion I liked…one bit. 

     “Why are you wondering about this?”

     She squirmed slightly on me. “Well…I…never mind. I was only
curious.”

     I squeezed her waist. “It was more than that. Tell me.” There was
no way I could just let this go.

     A large breath of air burst from her. “It’s just that…every time
we’ve had sex I haven’t done all that much…just kind of laid there and let you
do what you want to me. Is sex better with someone who knows what their doing?
Do you like being in control? Because the other day you were very…dominant, and
positioned me in ways you wanted. It was very good, but is that what does it
for you, or should I…maybe start doing some things?”

     I stared at her in shock, and then laughter bubbled up out of me.
The shaking caused my dick to slide out of her, which was disappointing, but
for the first time since climaxing Shaw raised her head to look at me, and I
could see she wasn’t appreciating my amusement. I however, appreciated the view
of her breasts.

     “Why are you laughing?”

      Shaking my head I clasped her head between my hands and kissed
her. “Red, the reason I’ve gone all Dom on you is because I’m mad with lust for
you. I get my hands on you and I can’t control myself. I’d like to tell you
I’ve been drawing on my experience when I make love to you but every time I touch
you my brain shuts down. You light a fire inside me that turns into a wildfire
with the smallest contact.”

     Her features cleared and a soft, pink flush colored her face.
Giving me a sham eye roll she snorted. “You like that wildfire reference.”

     “Sorry, am I becoming boringly repetitive? I should have switched
it up and said firestorm this time.” I teased. “Or how about this; you’re like
my big toe and I want to bang you on every piece of furniture in the place.” 

     She tried holding back a smile. “I could say something about toes
and asses…but I won’t.”

     “Too late.” I licked at her lips while my hands caressed down her
shoulders, back and ass. “I’m all for you taking charge, Shaw, but I…” I
groaned as she slithered against me; breasts, belly, mound. “Have to warn you,
you just might kill me in the process.” Shit, she felt awesome.

     Shaw rose up and stared down at me with curious uncertainty. “So I
could be…on top this time?”

     Grabbing her hips I slicked her wet pussy up and down my swelling
cock. “It would be my pleasure.” I croaked, meaning that literally. “Let me
just…” Bring her forward I engulfed one of her breasts, sucking and rolling the
nipple around on my tongue I released it grudgingly and settled her back on my
abdomen. “Okay, I’m all yours.”

     Chest heaving, Shaw rose up and stared into my eyes then down at
my body in arousal and indecision. I didn’t doubt that she would rise to the
occasion though, and the next second she showed me. Leaning down she took my
nipple in her mouth, mimicking what I’d just done to hers, and I groaned at the
sensation.

     Clenching my fingers in her hair I forced myself not to direct
her. I just needed to touch her. “You’re setting off that firestorm, Red.”

     Her mouth moved to my other nipple. When had those little nubs
become so sensitive? They’d never been before. Her eager teeth nipped down my
abdomen, through my happy trail, to my cock that was now jutting up in impatience.

     A groan rumbled from my chest when Shaw’s hands wrapped around it,
stroking it. “It really is thick. I can’t even get one hand around it.” She
murmured in awe. “I can’t believe this fits inside me.” I watched her,
mesmerized, as her lips stretched around the bulbous head, giving it a quick
lick and suck. She pulled off and her nose wrinkled slightly. “I can taste
myself a little bit. That’s…weird. The taste of you underneath it cancels out
gross and weird though.”

     A grin was about to curve my mouth but she leaned down taking me
into her mouth and a long-ass moan spilled out instead. “Shiiit…So fucking
good, Shaw.” My fingers tangled back in her hair and I couldn’t stop myself
from guiding her slightly, but I was careful not to jam myself down her throat.

     Shaw didn’t fight it, taking me deep; one of her hands stroked
along with her mouth, while the other one massaged my balls. I was reaching
critical.

     “Red.” I grunted. “I don’t want to spill in you mouth. Climb on
top of me. Take me inside you.” I begged.

     Drawing her mouth off me slowly with a deep suck that left me quaking,
Shaw shifted up my body settling herself over my cock-stand. My hands gripped
her hips as she gradually lowered herself down onto me. My eyes wanted to roll
again but the sight of her was too glorious to miss. Her red hair was
everywhere; some curls falling over her flushed face, some teasing her breasts
that swayed beautifully with her movements. 

     “Ohhh, this feels different.” Shaw whimpered. Leaning forward, she
set her hands on my chest and stared at me with aroused wonder as she hit
bottom. “Every way feels amazing, but different. You need to show me all the
ways.”

     And with that astonishingly, awesome dictate, Shaw began moving;
she rose and fell, she rocked, she circled. I could see she was experimenting,
trying to find what felt the best to her, but to me they all felt fantastic.
She whimpered, and panted, and gasped out random words of pleasure looking like
she was reaching a plane of bliss outside this planet, and I damn-well enjoyed
watching her get there. 

     My hands touched her everywhere; guiding her, molding her breast,
pinching her nipples, but I reached a point where I couldn’t hold back any
longer. Winding my arms around her waist I brought her down, mashing our chests
together, and capturing her mouth I began hammering into her from below.

     “I’m sorry…Red…I…could only…hold out…for so long. You’re too
amazing.” I grunted past each thrust.

     “Yesss…yessss…yesss…oh god, Evan!” Shaw cried into my mouth. 

     Remarkably, we orgasmed together, again. Her hot, silky inner
walls pulsing around me as I swelled and shot load after load into her. It went
on forever, her deliciously, demanding contractions draining me dry of every
last liquid ounce.

     She crashed on top of me, panting for breath and trembling. I was
in the same state underneath her. The responses and completions we elicited
from each other were out of this fucking world. I had to wonder if it was
something I would ever find again after her.

     And the thought of that had me frowning. Why had I even thought
about that? It definitely wasn’t something I wanted to contemplate right now…or
ever? Wow and Shit!

     “How did that work for you?” I asked hoarsely, nuzzling into her
hair.

     “I can see me trying it again.” She gasped.

     “Thank god.” I returned with a smile.

     Two minutes later Shaw slumped even more heavily onto me and I
knew she’d crashed into sleep. I sighed in even greater satisfaction knowing I
was spending the night. Maneuvering carefully I got her under the covers, and
then straightening I stared down at her for a moment.

     Damn, she was beautiful, and looking at her caused a twinge in my
chest that was difficult to decipher; it also wasn’t the first time I’d felt
it. In sleep her face lost that sharp edge I was certain came from life kicking
her ass, leaving her looking softer. It was hard to believe she couldn’t see
her own beauty but I understood where her self-doubt came from; a life with too
many disappointments. I hope I wouldn’t be another to add to her list.  

     Spinning on my heal I headed to the kitchen to grab a glass of
water. I was accustomed to spending the night with women at their places, but I
had never looked forward to it like I was with Shaw. For days I’d been
anticipating the morning I got to wake up next to her.

     A lot of my thoughts during the day…and night…centered around Shaw
and it was bizarrely uncontrollable, and while that part was disconcerting,
being with her was too invigorating to let that little issue derail my time
with her.

     Filling my glass again I strode back to the bedroom. Placing the
glass of water on the table next to her bed I slid in under the quilt behind
her and spooned up against her back. Letting out an unconscious sigh of
contentment I closed my eyes and fell into sleep breathing in her scent.