Dimitri's Forbidden Submissive (Submissive's Wish) (23 page)

She stared at him, a bit creeped out by the way he could sit so still, almost like a statue. “I’m not fucking you, Alex.”

“I accept that, but we will have to do something.” He sighed and his expression thawed somewhat. “You must sell them on wanting me, Rya. Even if I disgust you, we must make them believe that you are of no value to them, that there is nothing between you and Dimitri.”

“How? How the hell am I supposed to pretend I want your touch when the thought makes me ill.” She angrily wiped away a tear. “How can you say he loves me when he’d let his brother fuck me.”

Alex abruptly stood and stalked across the room towards her. If Dimitri was a wolf Alex was a tiger and her poor little rabbit heart raced as she was caught in the gaze of a predator. “Do not question his feelings for you. He is beside himself with worry. I have never seen him like this and we have been through
terrible
things together.”

He stopped just out of reach, and she had to crane her neck to look up into his eyes as he loomed over her. She shoved at his chest but he didn’t move; his body was solid muscle beneath her palms. “Back off.”

“I must show you something since you do not seem to understand the level of danger you are in.”

Baffled, she watched as he unbuttoned his white dress shirt, revealing a body built just as fine as Dimitri’s but a bit leaner. She looked up to his face but he wasn’t watching her with anything even close to lust. Instead that immense, roaring pain was back in his eyes. After shrugging out of his jacket he took his shirt off and stepped back.

She looked all over his body, stunned by the number of scars covering him. The men in the MC club had lots of battle wounds, and she’d heard plenty of stories about how they got them so she was able to catalog his scars. Bullet wounds, what looked like stabbing scars, a burn on his ribs, and various other injuries marked his body. She looked up from his stomach, absently noting he had an excellent six pack and sexy V, then up his chest.

Alex touched a beautiful tattoo over his heart. There was something written in Cyrillic and below the writing a rose in full bloom with its stem intertwined with another rose, this one still just a bud. “Did Dimitri tell you about my Jessica?”

Frowning, she shook her head. “No.”

His entire body sagged and she was afraid he was going to fall to his knees before he stood straight again. He looked out the window instead of at her. “Five years ago, I met an American girl while I was…working in Ireland. She was beautiful, so full of light and love despite her harsh upbringing in the American foster care system. And smart, so smart. We would play chess after her shift ended until dawn at the pub where she worked and I rarely won. We quickly fell in love and I thought I could hide her, keep her safe. I married her and we lived together for three months before…”

“You don’t have to tell me. I can guess what happened.”

“We had just found out she was pregnant.” His voice broke and she took a step closer to him, wanting to comfort him, but he jerked away. “I tried to protect her, even forged a deal with the Boldin family behind my father’s back. I did everything I could to keep her safe. Everything. I would have sold my soul if the Devil would have bought it, but none of that saved my Jessica and our baby.”

This time she didn’t hesitate to hug him, merely wrapping her arms around his stiff frame, the pain radiating from him. “Oh, Alex, I’m so sorry for your loss. What happened? How did they find you?”

He gave a harsh laugh but his hands were gentle as he rubbed her shoulders. “My brother said you would listen, that I would want to tell you, but I did not believe him. Are you some kind of sorceress?”

“No, just a good listener.” She felt him hesitantly hug her back and his tension lessened just the slightest bit.

“My father came to visit, somehow he’d found out about her. He wouldn’t…he wouldn’t give her his protection. He said that she was too gentle to be my wife, too fragile.” Anger entered Alex’s voice and his grip on her tightened. “Two weeks later Jessica died when her car exploded, instantly killing her and our child. They were vaporized by the intensity of the blast. I lost the only woman I could ever love. I was away, in Russia, cleaning up a huge mess my father had made when it happened. We did not even get to celebrate our baby properly. She would have made an excellent mother and I would have done everything I could to be the man both of them needed. When she died, my heart died with her.”

He shook in her arms and tears slipped down her cheeks as her heart hurt. “I’m so sorry for your loss.”

“Do not cry for me,
dorogaya
. I am responsible for her death and I will burn in hell for it.”

“No you…”

He gripped her by the shoulders and pushed her back so he could squat down and look her in the eye. “I tell you this so you understand why Dimitri is asking you to do something that hurts you so much. He loves you, but we cannot protect you. It is best if you vanish from our lives, but that cannot happen until our enemies are sure you mean nothing to us.”

“That’s a terrible way to live,” she whispered. “Would you really rather have never met Jessica?”

He was still for a long moment, his heartbeat thundering beneath his ear as he stroked her hair. “No. But I should have left her before they found her. If I had, my child would still be alive today.”

Abruptly he stepped away from her. “Rya, I need to take you to the public dungeon soon. What can I do to make it easier for you?”

She couldn’t even look at him, her shame warring with her anger. “I don’t think I can do this. If I see Dimitri with another woman…I love him. God help me but I do.”

An anguished sound escaped her and Alex cursed softly before kneeling in front of her. “The woman he will be with, Ilyena, she does not mean anything to him beyond a friend, does that help?”

She shook her head, keeping her eyes closed as if that could block him out. “It will break me. I know it. Anyone who is watching me will see how much he means to me.”

“Then we will take away your sight. Blindfold you. Would that be better?”

He was so earnest in his attempts to comfort her that she tried to think about this objectively. When she opened her eyes her gaze went to the memorial to his wife and child etched into his skin. It was one thing to read about and hear the stories of their loss, quite another to see the physical proof of Alex’s broken heart. She couldn’t do that to Dimitri, and well…shit…she really didn’t want to die anytime soon.

“It would.”

“How much do you think you can tolerate from me?” He gently ran his hands over her arms, causing chills to skate over her skin. “Where can I touch you?”

Embarrassed by her body’s reaction she tried to step away but he griped her arms. “I don’t know. How much do you need? What do you need? What are you going to do?”

He stood and picked her up, carrying her to the chair and sitting with her on his lap. She squirmed uncomfortably, not liking being this close to him. “Rya, it must look real, like you are enjoying my attentions.”

“Fuck. Alex, I can’t do this.”

“Yes, you can.” His serious expression lightened a bit and he put his hand beneath her chin, forcing her to meet his gaze. A small smile curved his lips, making her aware of just how handsome he was. “Am I that ugly?”

She sighed. Damn Novikov charisma. “No, you’re not.”

Something in his face, his body language changed and he began to stroke her throat, sending more of those uncomfortable chills through her. “I am a very good Master, Rya. I know how to get into a submissive’s mind, how to give her what she wants. Know that I can give you vast amounts of pleasure. But I will do nothing that you do not want.”

Mesmerized by his long fingers on her throat, she closed her eyes and tried to ignore how her body was slowly warming to him. “Dimitri will hate me.”

“No,
dorogaya
, he will not. I am here with his permission because he trusts me to treat you right.”

She gave a shaky laugh. “You know this is messed up, right?”

“Shhh, let me touch you. Let your body get used to me. Just feel.”

The command in his voice was the only thing keeping her from bolting from the chair when he began to caress her collarbone.

“Such soft skin, so pretty. I see why he loves to touch you. What does he call you? Ah yes,
zaika moya
, his rabbit. You are very brave, Rya, and I admire that in you.”

Her reply was lost as he began to toy with the edges of her dress, light caresses that made her pussy grow wet, needy. The conflict she felt over his touch only seemed to heighten her arousal in a perverse way, to fan her excitement into flames. She tried to argue with herself that she didn’t like it, that he wasn’t turning her on, but when his knuckles brushed her hard nipple she couldn’t stifle the moan that escaped her. Alex knew how to touch a woman for maximum effect and he used that knowledge on her with consummate skill.

His cock hardened beneath her and she had the nearly hysterical thought that both he and Dimitri had gotten lucky in the big dick lottery. Making a soft, soothing sound he shifted her slightly and stroked down her belly to her hip. She couldn’t move, feeling like her body belonged to someone else as he slowly gathered her dress up, the fabric scraping over her thighs.

She tried to pretend it was Dimitri, but Alex’s touch was different; she was all too aware of how fucked up it was that she was liking this.

When her panties came into view he made a pleased sound. “Very pretty.”

His words seemed to snap her out of the trance he was putting her in and she started to push off of him, but his arm locked around her. “No, you will stay and take the pleasure I will give you. Relax, little Rya. I will take care of you.”

The rough tone of his words mixed with her crazy fantasies about being forced, and she sucked in a harsh breath when his strong hand opened her thighs, moving one of her legs so her toes barely grazed the ground. His rough growl at the sight of her sex still covered by her panties made her pussy ache, and she battled her shame as she arched into his palm cupping her mound.

“Such a good girl. You love to please, don’t you? Such a hot, wet little pussy. You have soaked through the fabric. It pleases me very much.”

She buried her face against his chest, squeezing her eyes shut as he played with her over the silk, his long finger tracing along the slit of her sex. The hair on his chest tickled her face and she whimpered when he gently pulled her panties to the side, exposing her to his gaze. His cock twitched beneath her bottom and he let out a low growl.

“Beautiful, and so wet.”

His thumb split her sex and she gasped as he began to rub her clit. Almost against her will she rocked into his touch, her breath coming in ragged pants as she clutched at him, whimpering as he quickly worked her up to almost the point of orgasm. As she hovered on the edge he pulled his hand back, then moved her panties back in place before patting her mound.

“Please,” she whispered, hating herself for asking but needing the relief.

“Look at me.”

It took a great deal of effort to open her eyes and look up at him. When she did she gasped at the heat in his gaze and the absolute lust emanating from him. His lips curved into a small smile and she watched in fascination as he slowly sucked her glistening juices from his thumb.

“Do you want me to make you come?”

She nodded, her cheeks burning but her traitorous body craved release.

“Say it.”

The hard dominance in his voice undid her. “Please, Sir, make me come.”

“How?”

“With your fingers.”

“Not my mouth?”

“Ummm, not yet.”

He made a warm noise. “Perhaps I will convince you to let my mouth pleasure you.”

Before she could object, he began to play with her slit again, grazing his finger over her clit while he stared into her eyes. It was so odd to see that gunmetal a cool color when she was used to seeing Dimitri’s hot liquid silver desire warming her from within.

Alex slid one finger into her and she arched up into his touch, her body tensing. “Spoiled girl. Stay still. You will not come without permission.”

She nodded her understanding, unable to look away as he ever so slowly stroked his finger in and out. “Nice, tight
pizda
. Like wet velvet. Would feel good around my cock.”

Blushing furiously, she tried to close her eyes as he began to drive her towards her orgasm. He chuckled and leaned down to whisper against the sensitive skin of her ear. “Closing your eyes will only make it worse. You will think about what it looks like to have your pussy on my lap, my fingers shiny with your arousal. How you’ve dripped down onto my pants and how delicious you look. Let me lick your pussy, little Rya. Let me suck on your clit.”

Her clit throbbed as he slowly rubbed his thumb there. “Alex…”

“What is it?”

“I can’t think when you do that.”

“Do not think, feel. Know that I’m imagining fucking you with my tongue like this.”

She rubbed up against his hand, “You don’t fight fair.”

“All is fair in love and war, innocent Rya.”

Before she could protest he had her on the coffee table with her ass on the edge and her legs around his shoulders. He didn’t even look up, just began to lick at her pussy with long, sexy as hell growls. She closed her eyes and threaded her fingers through his hair, wondering if Dimitri would be aroused by watching his brother eat her out. Knowing her Master, the answer was probably yes. And if she was being honest with herself, Alex had some amazing oral skills.

He spread her legs wide and she keened softly at the sensation of his thick tongue moving inside of her. Chills raced down her spine and she dropped her hips down, trying to rub herself against his face. He backed away enough to bite her inner thigh, leaving a nice bruise she was sure, before returning his mouth to her pussy with a gentle touch that made her toes curl. He reached up with one hand and began to toy with her nipple while flicking the tip of his tongue over her clit.

“Please, may I come?”

He made a pleased sound and looked up. “I want to watch you.”