Dear Rose 3: Winter's Risk (7 page)

“When it’s late at night on base and all you have is donated DVDs, you’ll watch anything.” Zach shrugged. “It’s either that or polish off the donated jerky and Girl Scout cookies. And while the snacks are good, sometimes you want to watch something mindless. Get your brain away from where you are.”

Quinn nodded. He wanted Zach to keep talking. This was a moment. And he didn’t want to interrupt.

But as though he’d realized he was getting in too deep, Zach clammed up and stared off into space. They both stood there staring at each other. It was a strange silence that was overwhelming at the same time. It only lasted a few seconds, but it seemed like hours.

“You wanna go out to dinner?” Of course, Quinn broke it by talking. He’d never outlast anyone, especially not someone like Zach. He’d bet Zach was patient to the nines. Even his sister, whose nickname was Chatterbox, could stay quieter than Quinn.

“We can do that.”

“Or we could get takeout. There’s plenty of places around. Hang out here. Maybe watch a movie.” Quinn did a mental rundown of everything he had in stock. “You could pick something mindless.”

Zach nodded as if sizing up what Quinn had said. “We could do that.” He repeated the sentiment from before.

“Or we could go downtown to a club. Just not stay late. I think Temples is even open on weeknights.” Though Quinn didn’t often go, because on the weekends it was his home away from home. He had sometimes done brunches in the morning after closing down the club the night before. Didn’t make him want to see it on his days off. But if Zach wanted to, he’d go.

“We could do that.” Zach folded his tight arms over his chest. His face showed nothing. They might as well have been discussing the drying paint.

“Or we could go to the Byrd Theater and see a movie in second run. I think they have shows every night, even weeknights. And it’s fucking cheap.” He’d have to find some show times and see what was playing. Where was his newspaper? Right, he’d hidden it in the other room with all the mail that had come in from the last week. He’d get around to opening it. Eventually.

“We could do that.” Another repeat of the same statement. Said the same way. There was nothing to indicate which scenario he wanted.

“Are you going to say anything beside that?” Quinn threw up his hands. What infuriation. “Geesh. I’m giving suggestions on what we
can
do. All you keep saying is the same thing. I mean, fuck. You could at least vary how you respond.” He moved around the living room and scattered a remote or two. “You could at least change your tone. Give me some sign what you want to do.”

“Quinn.”

“You’re supposed to be helping with this date. I can’t come up with everything.” He wouldn’t meet Zach’s gaze. Maybe this was all a big mistake, even though it seemed like the best opportunity for a relationship Quinn had had in a long time. “I could use some input here—”

“Quinn.” The word was said more forcefully. Almost like an order. But it wasn’t shouted. If Zach had shouted, it wouldn’t have had the same impact as the quiet authority he projected.

“What?”

Zach set his coat down on the green sofa and stalked over to within a centimeter of Quinn. Their bodies were almost brushing against each other. All that hot hard body was within touching distance. Good touching. Maybe there was even leaning… Why did he have to think of
While You Were Sleeping
with the whole leaning conjecture that leaning your body into another implied wanting of that person? Quinn wanted Zach more than he could say. But Zach was pushing his body so near to Quinn’s all he’d have to do was tip a little that way, and there would be touching. Even as it was, he could feel the warmth pulsing from Zach like a sunburst.

And needless to say, Quinn couldn’t talk then. He couldn’t manage even a peep. His mouth dried out. Not with that big body in his personal space. He could smell Zach’s scent. It was woodsy with a hint of something like sandalwood. It suited him.

“I think there’s only one way to shut you up when you get like this.” Zach didn’t smile. Tenseness showed through every rigid muscle. He was much more stiff than when he’d come in.

“What would that be?” Quinn stayed still, a wonder for him. He liked to be in constant motion. But he didn’t want to break whatever was going on here. This spell had him captured and seemed to have Zach’s attention, and Quinn wouldn’t be the one to stop it.

“This.” Zach dipped his mouth and laid it across Quinn’s. He brought his hands up and shot his arms around Quinn so fast, Quinn couldn’t have escaped.

Not that he wanted to. Not hardly. No, he liked this just fine.

He returned the kiss with all the fervor inside him. Zach’s mouth was the fire, and Quinn was the kindling. He caught the flame, and it burned inside him like the toastiest heat ever.

Zach’s lips were limber, and they took as much as they gave from Quinn. They gave him no pause. Zach wouldn’t let Quinn pull away even for a breath. Apparently the man liked him against his body.

And it was so good, Quinn felt as though he’d pass out. As though all the air had been sucked from his lungs.

His cock strained against the confines of his clothes, wanting freedom.

Steam must be rising from us. In the air.

When Zach finally paused to take a breath, they both were panting. Quinn could feel the sweat on his body. Granted, his heat was on, and it was still fairly warm outside. The chill of the nighttime hadn’t taken over. But it wasn’t that hot. No, this was from the kiss. Just an embrace. They hadn’t even gotten naked yet.

God help me when we do.

Zach kept his forehead against Quinn’s for a few seconds. He kept staring in Quinn’s eyes as if searching for something. Whatever it was, did he find it? His next words gave an indication. “What I’d like to do tonight? I want to fuck you.” He didn’t show that he was sorry or wishy-washy. “That’s what I want to do.” He seemed surprised but calm at saying it.

“I’ll get the condoms.” Quinn didn’t even pause. Why should he? This was what he wanted too. “And the lube. Don’t go away.”

“Trust me. That ain’t going to happen.” And to further hurry Quinn along, Zach was undoing the top button to his jeans.

Like he was going to miss that.

Chapter Four

Zach watched the man’s face in front of him. It was a fascinating prospect. The earnest lust the man displayed would have tempted a eunuch. And Zach was no eunuch. That was how he’d gotten into this situation in the first place.

He splayed the top of his jeans wide open, challenged by the sultry face Quinn was giving him. Couldn’t help the smile that crept up his lips to make a full-fledged grin. Quinn had seemingly forgotten his mission. “Going to get stuff?”

Quinn swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down. “What? Right, the condoms and lube.” He shook his head as if he needed to clear it. Zach liked being the power behind that motion. “Don’t go away.”

“You said that already.” Quinn seemed to be worried Zach would take off if left alone. Not an unbelievable fear. How did the man know him so well after so few interactions?

“I know. Don’t do anything either. Just stay still.” He shot from the room like an arrow from a bow. So maybe he was afraid he might miss something. It would make him hurry this along.

Though he was tempted to strip to see the surprise on Quinn’s face when he returned, Zach stood perfectly still, listening to Quinn fumble around in the other room. There were a few muttered epithets.

What are you doing? Have you lost your mind? What has possessed you?

He looked up at the ceiling. Without Quinn here in front of him, it was hard to remember he’d told himself he’d give this a chance. Hard to keep the doubts at bay. The ones that always plagued him about any type of relationship, especially since his military service. And it was easy to go soft. His erection floundered without Quinn to keep it going.

He was bisexual. How many had he hurt with his inability to commit to only one sex? Others might not have that problem, but he sure did. And though they’d talked a big talk the other day with Josie, he didn’t see a threesome working out for anything long-term. There weren’t threesomes around them; they were all couples.

Which you could never be. Not for any length of time. There’s too much you want.

He wanted it all. At the same time. Josie and Quinn had seemed open, but reality would set in sooner or later. They spoke big words, but when it came down to it, could they go through with all three being together at the same time?

Yet a part of him wanted to believe he could have it this time. He wanted to drink the drink they were sipping from and go along with this. With this fairy tale of a happy ending. That they could all be together in some sort of three-way relationship and be joyous.

Tonight.

He’d let himself believe it tonight. Maybe tomorrow. But eventually life would rear its ugly head, and the thought of being with them would go away. He’d find a way to screw it up.

Happiness always left.

But this evening, he’d allow himself to be carried away in the dream of the naive. He’d be with Quinn. Let himself enjoy their time together. It had been so long since he’d been with another man. His last relationship had been a woman. A good woman.

Who you screwed over to chase a man who was straight and didn’t give you the time of day. And who never would have even considered this. Neither of them would consider what Josie and Quinn seem to be.

But this isn’t about that. This is about getting to know Quinn and Josie. Who aren’t Talia and Ernest.

Maybe tonight he could focus on Quinn and not have any thoughts about a woman, because he knew he’d be with Josie eventually. Maybe that
could
fix his problem, and then he could have a long-lasting relationship. After all, there was no way they’d agree to a complete threesome no matter what they said. He’d never tried things this way. Maybe it could work without going all the way.

As if on cue, Quinn darted back into the living room. He still seemed to be hurrying. He rubbed his knee with a muffled curse. “Stupid nightstand drawer.” In his hand were lube and a box of condoms. “Sorry. Had to search around a little bit. Been a while.”

It had been a while for Zach too, but that was a wonder Quinn didn’t have a lover in his bed every night. Life was full of fools. Zach had watched him dance, wanting him more than any other who stalked across that stage, shaking their booty.

Why?

What was it about him that called to something in Zach? His countenance was appealing, his personality winsome, and that had come across when he danced. He put himself into his performance. All of him hung out from body to soul. In looks he was Zach’s type, but in personality he wasn’t. He’d tended to go for tough guys and good girls. Neither Josie nor Quinn fit with whom Zach had been with in the past.

Maybe that was a good thing.

Zach had felt dead inside for a while. So naturally someone so full of life must appeal to him. He studied Quinn. Yes, he was brimming with a joie de vivre so few enjoyed. That had to be it.

Josie had the same quality. Despite being so different from Quinn. There was a spark in them both that shone through in everything they did. The first time he’d noticed Josie, she’d been dancing with abandon. Quinn often did the same thing in his shows. They both moved with a free spirit like no one was watching. Only Zach had been.

Zach wanted them to catch him on fire. He wanted to sample some of their flame and see if they’d share with him something he’d lost a long time ago. Maybe they’d ignite him.

Or maybe he’d extinguish them. He’d put out the thing in them that called to his being. He’d done it before.

No, he wouldn’t think like that.
Not tonight
. He banished any negative thoughts.

Instead, he examined Quinn from head to toe. Delectable. Things started to harden yet again. Just the man’s presence was enough to make Zach go back to erect. God help him when Quinn was unclothed. He’d squirt out like some untried teenager.

Quinn’s gaze shone through a hue of bluish tinged with green. He had unusual eyes. They must change color with what he wore, because Zach could have sworn they’d been blue the other day. Today, green had almost taken over, as he was wearing a light-green T-shirt with jeans.

Quinn’s feet were bare. A pair of sandals resided by the door as if waiting for someone to go out. He’d been expecting a date, not a full-fledged screwing like this on their first phase.

“You sure about this?” Zach didn’t want to ask the words for fear of denial, but he had to. Quinn hadn’t been anticipating this, though neither had Zach. Maybe they should use those shoes and forget about this. “Tonight and being with me.”

Quinn nodded. “Yep, yep. Never been surer.” He walked around Zach as if circling him and sizing him up for weakness. “You’ve been watching me a while now at Temples.”

“Yes.” Zach kept a wary eye on Quinn but didn’t let him get around to his back, keeping Quinn in front of him at all times. He slowly pivoted around on one foot.

“So do you bottom? Or top?” Quinn stopped his erratic circle but continued shimmying in place almost as if to music Zach didn’t hear. Leave it to Quinn to get right to the question at hand.

“What do you think?” Zach lowered his zipper, splaying his jeans aside even more. He pulled down the flap ever so slightly, not revealing anything but a bulge. It had the effect he wanted.

Quinn’s gaze had dived down upon the first centimeter of the zipper and wouldn’t shift back up. “Top. You’re a top all the way.” He licked his lips as soon as the words exited his mouth.

“Dammit, you got it in one.” Zach lifted his hand, ignoring Quinn’s gasp. Was the sound because he’d removed his hand or because of how much Quinn could see?

“That could be a problem.” Quinn’s voice dropped so Zach could barely hear what he said.

Zach reached the second button of his shirt—first one unbuttoned—and began to undo them one by one with painstaking slowness. “Oh?” He kept his gaze on Quinn’s face, watching every nuanced response.

“I’ve only bottomed once. Usually
I’m
a top.” Quinn arched a brow, not nearly as captivated by the shirt show as he had been when Zach’s hands were at his pants. So he wanted to see dick, did he?