Dark Wolf Returning (17 page)

“You’ve got a problem on your hands with that one,” Eli said, before the guy could mow him down.

Drawing to a stop, Cian’s head shot up, his grim expression twisting into an even darker scowl. “And you don’t?” he muttered, obviously talking about Carla.

Scrubbing his jaw, he said, “Reyes is
just being stubborn.”

The Runner slowly arched one of his ebony brows. “Is that what you call a woman willing to risk her life to end her bond with you?”

He flinched at those softly spoken words, feeling as if he’d just been kicked in the stomach. “What did you say?”

Pulling a pack of cigarettes from his pocket, the Irishman took one out as he murmured, “There aren’t many secrets
here in the Alley, Drake. You’d do well to remember that.”

Eli took an aggressive step forward, his hands curling into fists. “Why the hell did you say she was willing to risk her life?”

Lighting his cigarette, Cian took a long drag, then slowly exhaled as he locked his shuttered gaze with Eli’s. “You know how our world works,” he said in a low, lilting rasp. “How nature works. One rarely
gets something for nothing. There’s always a risk, and some are greater than others. What matters is what we’re willing to gamble with to get what we want.”

“Are you telling me her life would be in danger if Jillian breaks the bond?” he growled, feeling a muscle begin to pulse at the side of his jaw.

Cian slid him a chilling look. “I’m saying it might damn well kill her.”

He swallowed
as he locked his jaw, thinking
Christ. Oh, Christ
. How desperate must Carla be if she was willing to take that kind of risk?

As desperate as my mother was?

He flinched again, that particular thought striking his body like a physical blow. It was
that
jarring and painful. He wanted so badly to quiet the voices in his head, but it was impossible to stop the destructive train of his thoughts.
Because if she was willing to go that far, was there anything he could do, anything at all he could say, that would ever get through to her?

Wasn’t that what kept me away from her these past months? The fear that she’d already scarred me from her heart?

Damn it, he needed out of this place. And he needed a bottle.

Turning away from the Irishman, Eli figured it was time that he finally
made his way back home.

Chapter 11

T
wenty-four hours later, Eli still hadn’t returned from wherever he’d run off to. After their argument, Carla had stood at the window in Wyatt and Elise’s guest room and watched him drive one of the mercs’ big black trucks out of the Alley. And he hadn’t been back since.

I should be relieved. It’s what I wanted.

True. The only problem was that relief was the
last thing she was feeling.

She hadn’t wanted to run out on him, after sharing something so incredible, but she’d panicked when the word “love” had almost slipped from her lips. She might have finally come to terms with the fact that she was madly, desperately in love with him, but that didn’t mean she was ready to tell him. Just because he’d said the words to her didn’t mean it was smart
to say them back. Not until she understood
why
he’d said them...and was sure of his feelings.

Because she really did fear that it might have more to do with the bond than it did with his heart.

But what about the things he said about his mom and his dad and how he felt about me?

Then again, am I just meant to forget that he supposedly decided to leave me behind for my own good,
without even giving me the choice? Without even talking to me about it or telling me goodbye?

Damn it, she didn’t know how to process everything that was churning round and round in her head, and the result was a cracking headache that she hadn’t been able to shake for hours now. She wanted to crawl into bed and sleep for a week, the session she’d worked with Wyatt that day on the training
fields making her as physically exhausted as she was mentally, but she was due over at Jillian’s in twenty minutes for dinner, and she still needed to freshen up. So a nap was unfortunately not in the picture.

Fifteen minutes later, she’d managed to grab a quick shower, throw on a pair of leather sandals, clean jeans, and a slouchy gray top, as well as put on a little blush and lip gloss.
Wyatt and Elise were over at her cabin, having dinner with the women who were living there at the moment, so she pulled her keys from her pocket as she stepped out onto the porch, intending to lock the door behind her. But she froze the minute she looked up and realized she wasn’t alone.

They were all there, the Runners and their mates, standing around the front of the cabin, watching her
with careful gazes, as if this was some kind of intervention. A wild burst of laughter almost rumbled up with that thought, and she wondered when her life had become like a crazy TV sitcom.

“Did I suddenly become insanely popular,” she murmured, arching her brows, “or did you guys need something?”

Eric climbed up the porch steps, his handsome face set in a chilling expression of anger.
“Go. Get. Him,” he said in a low, guttural voice. “Now.”

“What?”

“Eli went up to Shadow Peak yesterday, and spent the night at my place, where he apparently decided it was a good idea to get shit-faced. I want you to get your ass up there and bring him back.”

Her eyes narrowed, and she could feel her own temper simmering at his tone. “Why me?”

“Because you’re the one who put
him there,” Eric growled, and she was a little surprised that no one, not even Wyatt, took exception to the Runner’s tone. Jesus, did they all blame her? Were they all on Eli’s side?

Crossing her arms over her chest, she said, “You can’t put this on me, Eric. That isn’t fair.”

“Why shouldn’t I? He’s done nothing but follow you around since he got back, trying to get you to give him the
time of day, and all you do is make him feel like shit. Accuse him of stuff he hasn’t even done. If I thought there was a chance in hell he could find someone else, I’d tell him to get out there and do it. But he’s hung up on you, because the two of you friggin’ belong with each other. So fix it and get him back down here!”

“Eric,” his wife murmured, sounding concerned.

“Not now, Chelse.
I’ve been patient, but this is getting ridiculous.” He got right in Carla’s face, and lowered his voice. “I watched him go through shit with my old man while growing up, doing everything he could to keep that bastard happy, never getting anything back for it. I won’t watch him go through the same thing with you.”

She flinched, reeling on the inside as Eric’s harsh words worked their way through
her system. Was he seriously comparing her to their crazy psycho father? What the hell?

And why was she even bothering to argue with him about this when she actually
wanted
to go up to town and check on Eli? She’d have been lying if she’d said she wasn’t worried about him. But then, she was also worried about what she might find when she got there.

“Are you sure he doesn’t have company?”

Eric gave her a stunned look, then laughed. Shaking his head, he said, “God, I wish I could tell you that he had a woman with him. It would serve you right, Reyes. But he’s at my place, and he’s alone.”

She’d known that Eric still had his house up in Shadow Peak, though he and Chelsea never stayed there. When she’d asked Elise about it, his sister had said that the couple was thinking
of selling the house once things had settled down. But this was hardly the time to be worrying about real estate.

Since Carla was already dressed and had her keys with her, she left Eric and the others standing around the cabin after murmuring a few words to them and headed straight for her car. The short drive to Shadow Peak took forever, thanks to the security checkpoints she had to go
through. She knew it was just her imagination, but she felt like she was being judged by every single person she came into contact with, as if she were walking around with a scarlet RB on her forehead that apparently stood for Raving Bitch. It hardly seemed fair, seeing as how none of these Lycans knew the full story, but such was the nature of gossip.

She was familiar with where Eric lived,
and was parking on the curb in front of the attractive two-story just a few minutes after reaching the town. Her gaze flicked to where the black truck was parked in the driveway as she turned off the engine, telling her Eli was definitely there. Curling her hands around the steering wheel, she lowered her head, banging her forehead against the leather wheel, then stopped and raised her head again,
looking around. There were so many scouts posted now, there was no telling who was watching her from the thickening darkness. Were they waiting to see if he slammed the door in her face? At the moment, she was feeling a bit as if it might be deserved, which made her scowl.

Forcing herself out of the car, she shut the door and headed up to the house, climbing the porch steps and then knocking
on the door. The powerful, smoky scent of whiskey was the first thing that hit her nose when he ripped the door open, followed immediately by the richer, deeper scent that was completely his. A heady, erotic blend of soap and salt and the wild outdoors. Wearing nothing more than a faded pair of jeans, he stared down at her through hooded eyes that were thankfully focused, despite the scent of
the alcohol. His jaw worked a few times, and then he muttered, “What are you doing here, Reyes?”

“Thanks to your brother,” she murmured, “I’ve been sent to collect you.”

“Ah. Of course you have. God knows you wouldn’t have come after me on your own.” He turned and headed back into the living room, leaving her to walk in and shut the door herself.

After glancing at the disheveled
room, the coffee table littered with bottles and a blanket hanging halfway off the sofa, she looked at him and arched one of her brows. “Been having fun up here?”

He slid her a shuttered look as he sat on the arm of the sofa, his muscular arms folded over his broad, beautiful chest, the golden skin gleaming beneath the soft glow of the track lighting. “You’d like to think that, wouldn’t you?”
he replied, his tone flat. “To have something that would give you even more of a reason to hate me.”

She stiffened, something in his tone setting her even further on edge. “I don’t hate you, Eli.”

“Sure you don’t,” he drawled with a mocking smile on his sensual lips.

She rubbed her forehead, wondering what his problem was. As well as hers. She couldn’t seem to get close to him without
saying whatever she could think of to piss him off.

“Believe it or not, Rey, no one’s been here but me.” At the look she cut him, he said, “Use your nose, little wolf. Come over here and sniff the blanket I’ve been sleeping under. Sniff any friggin’ surface in the house you want. You won’t find what you’re looking for.”

“Why?” she asked softly, blurting the question out before she had
the sense to stop herself.

His gaze narrowed in on her face, the long lashes making it difficult to read the look in his eyes. “Are you asking me why I haven’t been busy screwing my way through the pack?”

Her response was simple and to the point. “Yes.”

She couldn’t help but watch the way his biceps bulged as he lifted an arm, hooking his hand around the back of his neck. His breath
left his lungs on a rough exhalation, and he said, “I haven’t had sex with anyone because the woman I want hasn’t been on the top of this bloody mountain with me.” Lowering his arm, he held her gaze like he never meant to let it go, and continued speaking through his gritted teeth. “I haven’t had another woman, Carla. Not since you. Hell, I haven’t had one since long before that night we were
together.”

For a few dizzying seconds, all she could do was stare at him in shock, unable to believe he was actually trying this with her. God, did he think she was a fool? A naïve little idiot who would believe anything he told her, if it was what he thought she wanted to hear? “Don’t. Even. Try. It,” she seethed, so angry she was shaking.

He rolled one of those hard, muscular shoulders
as he moved to his feet and turned away from her. He walked to the front window, bracing a hand against the top of the frame as he stared out into the starless night. “Get pissed, Rey. It doesn’t matter what you do or what you believe. You can’t change the truth.”

“I’ll never believe you.”

“Christ, that’s almost funny.” His head dropped back on those mouthwatering shoulders as he laughed.
“You believe everything that
isn’t
true, but not what is.”

“Fine, then answer me this. What about the blonde in the dive bar when I found you?”

The hand he had braced on the top of the window frame curled into a fist. She listened as he took a few hard, deep breaths, watching the muscles in his sleek back flex with the movement, and then he said, “She’d dropped into my lap, trying to
flirt, when she passed out in my arms. Since I couldn’t have cared less about her, I let her sleep there.”

“You actually expect me to believe that nonsense?”

He turned around as he pushed his hands in his pockets, the masculine pose making him look like something that women would plaster all over their bedroom walls and drool over. Tall, dark, and outrageously delicious, with his piercing
eyes and that wild hair, a dark covering of stubble shadowing the hard angle of his jaw. Taking a step toward her, he growled, “Would it make you believe me if I completely humiliate myself for you? What would you think if I told you that I was desperate for even that small, pathetic bit of comfort, after so many years of missing you until I felt like my insides had been scraped raw? That I’d
sat there, drinking my whiskey, trying like hell to pretend that it was
you
I was holding?”

“I don’t...I can’t...”

With his gruff words drowning in frustration, he took another step closer to her and muttered, “I don’t know why you think this would affect me any differently than it would you. How eager have you been to find some other male to rut between your legs?”

Her chest shook
with a hollow, heavy laugh. “I was so angry with you that I
wanted
to. I wanted to find someone.”

“Don’t.” His nostrils flared as he took a sharp breath, his deep voice little more than a snarl. “I don’t want to hear it.”

As quickly as her anger had come, it vanished, leaving her feeling deflated, like a balloon that had sprung a leak. “It...it doesn’t matter. I couldn’t go through with
it. No one...I just...there was no one after you,” she finished lamely, her voice so small it made her cringe.

For a moment, she thought he was going to close the distance between them and take her into his arms. But then he turned around again and stalked back to the window, his tall body hard with tension. “It was the same for me,” he said quietly.

“I find that so hard to believe,”
she whispered. “I mean, you could have had any woman you wanted.”

Seconds ticked by as he stood there before the large window, staring out at the darkened street, while she fought the urge to go to him and wrap her arms around him, pressing her cheek against his warm back...simply holding him as tightly as she could. Pretending, just for a moment, that she wasn’t broken inside and the past
had never happened. That they could start fresh, without any of the pain and fear and resentment.

Finally, he broke the silence, his deep voice rough with emotion. “There were a few times, when I was lonely, that I thought it might help to find another woman. Times when I tried damn hard to put you out of my mind. Wishing I could just rip you out for good.

“When I left here, I told myself
that when the time came that I wanted sex again, I would approach it with the sense of detachment it deserved. A bodily function that had to be fed, nothing more. And when it was done, I would move on, wiping it from my mind. I wouldn’t think about what I’d lost. And I sure as hell wouldn’t waste time wishing for things that could never be mine.”

He turned a little to the side as he slumped
against the edge of the window frame, his profile so stark it could have been carved out of granite. “But I could never go through with it. I would find a woman, talk to her, drink with her. But when it came time to get down to it, not only were my body and heart unwilling, all I could think about was the look that would be on your face if you saw me touching someone else.” Shaking his head, he
gave a bitter laugh. “Guess that was stupid, though, seeing as how you already hated my guts. It’s not like falling into bed with some woman I didn’t even want could have made you hate me more.”