Authors: Zoey Derrick
“Honestly, I think she’s more worried about stealing your spotlight than the fame of it all.”
“She really did mean that earlier, didn’t she?”
I nod my head. “We’d talked about it before she brought it up with you. She never wanted this. She never even so much as hoped to have a singing career. She’s always been content doing what she does for a living.”
“I feel so bad, roping her into this.”
“You didn’t do it on purpose. She was out there, you planned to sing it to her. You didn’t expect her to sing along. Add to that the fact that she sings as well as she does? How were you to know?” I shrug, “And I’m sure you weren’t thinking about the potential consequences for having her sing into the mic. Hell, a lot of artists do it at their concerts and the best they get is a ton of YouTube hits on some random piss poor video. She’s an amazing singer, and I’m surprised she hasn’t been discovered before this. She sounds like a grittier version of Amy Lee and a rock chick in this day and age is very hard to come by. Which is why she’s so popular right now. The girls will gravitate toward her, the guys will ‘fall in love with her’ and what she chooses to do from there is entirely up to her. But I will tell you one thing, she will never ask for anything. She won’t ask for another song. If you want her to keep this up, you’re going to have to keep writing songs.”
He looks at me. “Too late.”
I laugh. “Well, unless you’re dumping the guys, you can’t bring her in constantly on everything.”
“No, but I can try and work out an acoustic album deal.”
“Going solo?” I scowl at him. “Dude, you’ve barely been with the band, I highly doubt…”
“Kyle, relax, that’s not what I’m talking about. Look, it’s a great fun idea, but I will never ever ditch the guys like that. I think we need to get through this tour, nail down the new album and then figure things out. Besides, if she makes a name for herself, one of two things will happen.” His voice drops to a whisper. “One, she does nothing with it, continues along with us or two, she decides to run away with what’s being thrown at her and the likelihood of us being able to sing together again will disappear.”
I slouch into the couch. “I hadn’t thought about that,” I tell him.
“See, we’re dwelling on all the things we don’t know. We need to stop. Now come on, she’s probably waiting for us.”
I snort a laugh. “Two and a half hours. It took her two and half hours to get ready for tonight. You think she’s ready now?”
He laughs with me. “No, but let’s go anyway, I miss her.”
I sigh, “Yeah, me too.”
“I need to clean up this pigsty tomorrow. Jesus,” I say aloud.
“We’ll do it.” I turn to see Talon and Kyle standing in the hallway.
“No, your packing has put me in this pickle. Besides, I’m capable of cleaning, cooking and many other things. Speaking of food, I’m starving.”
I watch as they both smile. “Well, then let’s go so you can eat,” Kyle says with a smirk. “Unless of course you prefer a liquid diet.”
I giggle. “Unless it’s alcohol, forget it, mister, you can wait.”
He pouts. “I bet we can change her mind,” Talon says looking at Kyle, who looks back at Talon.
“Oh, for the love of my vagina, you two are too much sometimes,” I tease, dropping my skirt and their jaws drop. “Ha! Three can play at this game.” I pull my shirt over my head.
“Shit, we gotta get her a stripper pole,” Talon teases.
“Hell yeah, she’d make one hell of a stripper.”
“In your dreams, boys.” I set about trying to remove a pasty. “Fuck, this hurts.”
“Water might help,” Talon says flicking his tongue at me.
I roll my eyes. “Anything to get my nipples in your mouth.”
“Fucking straight. Your nipples are by far the most beautiful, tasty things on the planet. I could suck on them all day long,” Talon says with a salacious smile and Kyle’s own expression matches.
“You’re like babies being weaned from the boob.” I stick my tongue out at them.
“Now that’s an idea.” Talon’s eyes light up.
“Oh for Pete’s sake, I’m on birth control, you know.”
He snorts a laugh. “Oh, but I’m sure we could find a way without putting a baby in there, though that’s…” He lets the thought trail off. He doesn’t need to finish it, I know where he’s going with that thought.
“I’m not opposed, please don’t think that, but it is way, way too soon to be talking about babies,” I tell him and he nods his head in agreement and the thought I had earlier, that I couldn’t get a hold of before, comes back into my mind. I shake it off. It’s way too soon to even be thinking about babies and what not.
“Can you let me finish?” I ask and the playful atmosphere disappears and I regret it instantly. But I need to be alone for a minute.
“Yeah, we’ll be up front,” Kyle says, though Talon hasn’t moved much since he said what he did. I wonder what’s running through his mind.
“Dude, what was that all about?” Kyle asks when we get back to the galley.
“Fuck, it just slipped out. I have no idea where it came from.”
“Maybe we should go back to wrapping…”
I shake my head. “I can’t go from wrapped, to unwrapped and back to wrapped again. With you, that’s different, but not with her. Fuck…” I scrub my face with my hands and sit down. “She’s fucking petrified.”
“Stop, it’s alright. I think the whole conversation got away from everyone. Give her a minute. You know her, she’ll be over it in no time and we’ll go right back to the way it was before. Believe me, I’ve had the same thoughts,” he tells me.
He sits down next to me. “The scary part about all this, with her, is that I’ve never wanted anything. No relationship, no family, no nothing before. Now it seems like it’s all I can think about. Fucking scares the hell out of me.” I scratch my chin.
“That’s the way it’s supposed to be.”
“How so?”
“Well, imagine if you walked through life, desperate for a woman on your arm, a baby in your lap, a ring on your finger, what would happen?” I shrug. “You’d be consumed with it, constantly dating, falling in and out of love, thinking you’ve found the one only to have her cheat on you and it’s over. But if you walk through life as you, she and I have, just going from one day to the next and the next, it’s easier. Though it hasn’t made us any less promiscuous, it’s been easier for us to ignore the long term idea when the short term solution is sucking our dicks.” Fuck, he has a point. “The girl, the one for you is supposed to make you stop sleeping around, stop being a dick and settle down, that’s what she’s supposed to do when you meet her. That’s what she does to both of us.”
“Fuck, it’s just all so fast,” I groan.
“But what’s wrong with that? Do you want to run off and marry her this instant?” I shake my head. “Do you want to knock her up right now?” I shake my head again. “Do you want to go sleep with another woman?” I shake my head again. “See, what you feel for her is taking over that impulse to want to be with someone else, that’s where this starts, that’s where it all begins. In time, the rest of the stuff will come. That’s not to say that if she does get pregnant, because we’re not exactly careful, we won’t want it to happen, it’s just we’re not going to plan for it to happen.”
“Fuck, when you least expect it is when it always happens.”
“So be it. Just let this whole thing run its course, let her be her, let us fall in love with her, let us devour her every chance we get and leave the real deep heady stuff for a day when we really need to deal with it.”
He doesn’t say anymore and we both set our heads back against the top of the couch. He’s fucking right of course and I knew it before he said it, it’s just I still can’t believe it slipped out of my mouth like that.
“I need a drink.”
“Me too,” She says and both our heads pop up. She’s smiling and dressed in her Nirvana t-shirt, no bra, the pasties are gone, yummy, and ripped skinny jeans tucked into a pair of knee high, three inch heel patent leather boots.
I can’t stop staring. “Fuck me,” I breathe.
She smiles. “Later.” She winks and comes to stand between us, grabbing our hands and pulling us up. “Let’s go drink.”
The night out was exactly what I needed after what happened on the bus. Though what happened wasn’t anything bad, just unexpected. Couple that with the fleeting thought I had when Kyle wrapped his arms around me before the show and I was a mess. The only thing that pulled me out was the fact that I knew Talon was beating himself up over the idea. Not only by what he’d said.