Courting Mrs. McCarthy (16 page)

The movie was good for Jackie, who laughed more than Nathan was expecting. Some of her laughter sounded a bit forced. They cuddled while the
mockumentary
played, giving Nathan hope that his time as her significant other was not over. He found it interesting that he’d likened Steve being removed from the situation with the end of his time with her, but he got the strange feeling that she’d want to move on to someone her own age once the taboo of adultery was no longer a factor.

When the movie was over, she turned to face him. “I’d better be getting home. I’ve been relying on Zhanna way too much lately, but I’m sure she likes the money.”

Nathan was sad to see her go, but also relived. The night had been taxing on him as well. He would find it hard to explain to his aunt why he spent the night at Mrs. Buchanan’s house. “Okay, let me know if you need anything. Really, anything at all,” he said as he embraced her for a hug.

“Thank you, Nathan,” she said, pausing for a second before addressing what had been on his mind. “Whatever happens between us, I want you to know how much you’ve meant to me over these past few weeks.”

This gave Nathan enough hope to realize that all was not lost. Jackie, in her vulnerability, still valued him as more than a crutch to lean on. “I know. Thank you. Don’t be afraid of Steve. Money and steroids don’t make him a man.”

Jackie waited for him on the porch while he locked up. Nathan was tired and didn’t feel like going through his house to clean for the second time that day. He wasn’t explicitly forbidden from going there anyway.

When Nathan turned around, Jackie grabbed him and gave him a long, romantic kiss. He closed his eyes and embraced her, knowing that whatever came next, he’d be there for her. His fear of abandonment did not mean that he couldn’t be there for someone who needed him.

He was so caught up in the moment that he didn’t notice the flash of a camera and the many pictures that followed as Corinne Kalford documented their public display of affection at the front door.

Chapter 23

Nathan slept well that night. His aunt has taken his cousins to swimming so he had the kitchen to himself to make breakfast. He was frying up some bacon and eggs when he saw his phone ring.

The call was from Griffin, who Nathan knew was working that day. Thinking that his friend was calling just because he was bored, he ignored it as to not disturb his cooking. He thought that it was odd that his phone started to buzz again, but thought nothing of it. Morning summer retail work was not the most exciting job on the planet.

The third call was when he grew concerned. He was annoyed that Griffin was pestering him in a near identical fashion to Jackie the night before. Seeing that something might actually be wrong, he picked up the phone.

“This better be damn important, Griffin, I’m in the middle of making breakfast.”

“Nathan, your secret is out. I got a call from Megan, who’s at the club. People are talking, dude. She even said there’re pictures of you two circling around.”

He felt as if his heart stopped. “Mother fucker,” he shouted, without even considering the irony of his expletive. “Does my aunt know?” If so, he was about to be in a world of trouble.

“I’m not sure. Look, man, I told my mom the whole thing. Don’t be mad. It seemed like the right thing to do. She knows your aunt and wanted to make sure that you knew we were here for you. It’s going to be okay, buddy.”

It most certainly was not going to be okay. “I need to call Jackie.” Fearing a world of hurt from his aunt, he added, “I’m probably going to need a place to lie low for a while. Hope that’s okay with your moms.” He hung up without waiting for an answer.

His eggs were burning. He put them into the sink without trying to salvage them, then turned the kitchen fan on with one hand and called Jackie with the other. He was sweating profusely.

The call went to voicemail. He called again to no avail. And again. He tried a fourth time before deciding to text her instead.

Jackie, call me as soon as you get this.

Just as he sent it, he heard the slam of a car door. Aunt Cassidy was home and it didn’t take a genius to know that she’d found out what had happened. He briefly considered escaping out the back door, but it was too late.

His aunt was in the kitchen in what felt like record time. Her face was nearly devoid of emotion, though he could see she was holding some. He didn’t care to know what it was.

“Tell me it isn’t true, Nathan.” She was breathing heavily, and she looked like she was ready to explode.

There was no point in lying, though the prospect was appealing. “It’s true. I can explain, Aunt Cass.” He wished he’d been given five more minutes to think of something to say.

She turned away in horror. He was unsure what to say to the woman who looked about ready to murder him. She took a few more deep breaths and replied, “So, last night you were with her, weren’t you?” Her face turned red with emotion and she screamed, “You lied to me, Nathan. Again and again.”

He thought back to the New York trip, and the night before. “I’m sorry I lied to you.” He didn’t apologize for what he’d done with Jackie.

Aunt Cassidy’s face shifted from red to a paler pinkish white. She poured herself a glass of water. “Here’s what we’re going to do. I’m going to call your father and we’re going to arrange for you to see a psychiatrist. Clearly his departure has had an effect on you that your uncle and I are simply unequipped to handle.”

The suggestion of a psychiatrist surprised him. He didn’t want to argue with his aunt, but he wasn’t being left with much of a choice. “Absolutely not,” he said. “I don’t need some psychoanalytical doctor telling me I did something wrong.”

This was not the answer his aunt had wanted. “Nathan, you lied to me repeatedly and you committed adultery. Your head is not in a good place right now and we need to get you some help.”

Nathan grew angry with the repeated suggestions that there was something wrong with him. “My head is fine, Aunt Cassidy. I did what I did knowing the consequences and I’d do it again in a heartbeat. Jackie and I had something that she hadn’t had with her husband for years. It was real.”

That last part may have been a little melodramatic, but Nathan stood by his statement. A psychiatrist would never be able to figure him out accurately and he didn’t want to spend forty-five minutes in a room with someone who had already formed an opinion on everything he had to say.

His aunt looked like she was growing impatient. “Nathan, this is nonnegotiable. If you expect to continue living in this house, you will meet with someone to discuss this abhorrent and sinful behavior of yours.”

His hand had been forced. There would be no trial for his actions; he had been found guilty in the court of Cassidy Thompson, and his sentence was months of intense scrutiny from someone he didn’t even know. This was not a sentence he was willing to accept. Unless he picked an alternative course of action.

He reached for his car keys, which were on the kitchen table. His aunt displayed a look of horror as she watched her nephew reject her ultimatum. “What do you think you’re doing?” she demanded.

The only thing on his mind at that present state in time was getting out of that house. He could worry about his possessions later, but Nathan needed to flee this hostile environment and get himself together.

“Aunt Cassidy,” he said, with the same type of dispassion that she displayed when she’d first entered the house. “I thank you for all you’ve done for me this past year. You, Uncle Martin, and the girls have been great. But you’ve issued an ultimatum that I simply cannot accept. I don’t expect you to understand why I did what I did, but I respect your wishes to not have an influence like that living under your roof. I shall now seek alternative housing options. I’ll be back sometime to pick up my belongings. I love you. Goodbye.”

With that, he left the house. Aunt Cassidy, presumably shocked, did not follow. He was thankful to have avoided a lengthy conversation. He had figured out early on that there was nothing he could say to convince her.

As he got into his car, he thought about where to go next. He didn’t really
need
to be anywhere, though many public places were out of the question until he knew the full extent of the gossip. He really wanted to see Jackie, but her house was the last place he should go. If she didn’t pick up her phone, chances were that she didn’t want to see him. He didn’t have much doubt that she knew as well.

Nathan instead drove to the Rousseau residence. That was the only place where he could cool off without fearing that some adult would scream at him or a kid his age would patronize him for what he’d done. He hadn’t regretted much of what he said to his aunt, but his mind was not in a great place. He’d worked with the hand he’d been dealt.

He walked up to their front door, giving it a knock. Since Griffin was at work, he’d have to use the spare key from behind their garage if no one was home. Fortunately, Megan opened the door.

“Come on in, sweetie. Everything will be all right,” she said, hugging him. As much as he wanted to be alone, Nathan embraced the sight of a friendly face.

He sat down in their living room while avoiding direct eye contact with Megan. She might be supportive of him, but he was still afraid of being judged. She brought him a cup of coffee.

“Do you need anything, Nathan?” she asked him as she sat down in a chair next to him.

The only thing he really needed was to find out if Jackie was all right, but that wasn’t something she could help him with. Instead, he asked, “How bad is it?” referring to the gossip at his yacht club.

Megan looked unsure of how to respond to the question. “I’m not really sure, sweetie. People are shocked. It’s definitely the talk of things around there right now, but I guess that was to be expected. No one’s saying bad stuff about you. It’s just that there’s nothing else going on and what you did is the flavor of the moment.” She had a smile on her face but she still looked sad for him.

It didn’t really make him feel better. “So, Jackie is the one getting all the slack then?” He sounded unintentionally hostile. He couldn’t get over how unfair that was to her.

“Nathan, people are going to talk. Jackie is the adult and she was already in a position to be gossiped about. Just relax. This will all blow over.”

He hoped it would, but he wasn’t feeling like much of an optimist. He told Megan he was tired so that she would show him to the spare bedroom where he could lie down and collect his thoughts. He didn’t normally sleep here when he slept over at the Rousseaus’ home, but he got the eerie feeling that this room would serve as his purgatory for the foreseeable future.

The bed at least felt comfortable as he climbed on top of it. Megan brought him fresh sheets and said she’d be happy to swing by the Thompsons’ house to get anything he needed. Nathan just wanted to be by himself.

In less than twelve hours, he had seen his chances with Jackie improve when she told him of her intentions to leave her husband, only to see them snatched away out of nowhere by the clutches of overbearing, nosy adults. In the back of his mind, he’d always seen this as a possibility. Even when he danced with the devil on the train ride back from the city, he’d never considered the idea that their affair could actually become public knowledge.

His feelings of loss were secondary to the anxiety he felt for Jackie, who had significantly more to lose in this public scandal. It was anyone’s guess as to whether or not Steve had figured it all out, which would make their divorce both faster and far more complicated at the same time. He thought of April, whom he hadn’t seen in a long time and wondered what she would say when she found out he’d been sleeping with her mother.

The pain he’d caused to Jackie and her children made him sick. His guilt came from feelings of selfishness, as if this fate was a forgone conclusion that he had allowed to happen. He’d been warned about it by Griffin, and chose to write off the possibility that someone in this town might catch on.

He thought of what he’d do to Corrine Kalford if he could be alone in her presence. Nathan wasn’t certain she’d been the one responsible for the leak, but he couldn’t think of anyone else who would do such a thing. Her gossiping was legendary but she’d never done something this cruel before. Either she was jealous of what he’d had with a woman far more attractive than her, or she did it out of pure evil against two human beings who were simply enjoying each other’s company. He suspected the latter.

Nathan dialed his phone once again in an effort to divert his attention from feelings of hatred. Despite his anger, he wanted to know Jackie was okay more than anything else. The call went to voicemail. Nathan thought about leaving a message but ended up just dialing again.

By the fourth ring on the second attempt, she picked up. “Nathan, I can’t really talk right now.” She spoke in a tone that seemed uncharacteristically empty of emotion. If anything, she sounded scared.

“Jackie, are you okay?” Going to her was the last thing that he should do, but he wanted to be ready for that.

“We’re heading to the airport soon. Steve called, and then his lawyer after I stopped speaking to him. We have to go to Seattle to deal with this. He’s coming at me hard. Nathan, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for it to happen like this. I’ll call you when I get the chance. Goodbye.” She hung up the phone, depriving Nathan of the chance to get the answers he so desperately desired.

He fell back against his pillow in a motion that was almost reactionary. He knew things were bad, but he never guessed they could’ve gotten this bad this quickly. He cringed at the thought of Steve, who was undoubtedly in a state of pure rage. His moves against her would be without mercy. He wondered if Corinne Kalford knew Steve at all.

She would be waiting across the street if he tried to get anywhere near Jackie. He wanted to give her a hug and a kiss and tell her everything would be all right, but he had no idea if that was the case. It probably wasn’t.

He wanted to go to her and be the knight in shining armor that she needed. It ate him alive to know there was nothing he could do for her. He thought going to Seers Point might take some of the attention away from Jackie. The best thing that could happen right now would be for there to be as much distance between them as humanly possible.

Instead, he laid there and wallowed in his own sorrow. A few minutes prior, he wondered if there was any way things could get worse for him without thinking of how they were getting worse by the minute for Jackie. He had nothing to lose from their affair, but she sure did.

Sleep felt like an escape he was undeserving of at the moment, not that he could fall asleep even if he’d tried. He was left with a void that nothing could fill. Time was elusive and unimportant to him.

He had nowhere to go and nothing to do except wait to hear from Jackie, who wouldn’t be able to call for hours even if she wanted to. This felt like a big
if
, and he could sympathize with that sentiment. Nathan wouldn’t want to talk to the person who’d ruined his life either, even if these negative thoughts only existed as figments of his vivid imagination.