Courting Mrs. McCarthy (14 page)

The pendulum thought otherwise as it decided to take a swing for the worse as an unfortunate passenger made her way into their train car.

“Nathan. Jacqueline. What a pleasant surprise,” said a nosy voice that belonged to Corrine Kalford. “What brings the two of you here on such a pleasant evening?”

If there was one person he could hope would never see them out and about together, it was Mrs. Kalford. She had already gossiped to the Rousseaus, and could just as easily tell his aunt about tonight. Nathan didn’t think that Jackie knew how horrible she was, so he took it upon himself to handle the situation.

“Oh, hello, Mrs. Kalford. I was at the New York Public Library and ran into Mrs. McCarthy on my way back,” he said. He took a bite of his hot dog to calm his nerves.

“Interesting. Well, you do like libraries more than the average teenager,” she replied with a sly grin. Nathan had no idea why this woman knew that he was a frequenter of the library. “And how about you, Jacqueline?” she asked.

Jackie looked a bit nervous as she caught on to the vile nature of the woman in front of them. “Shopping,” she replied. This was not a great answer. She had no bags.

Mrs. Kalford picked up on this and continued her Spanish inquisition, all while continuing to stand on the moving train. “I see. Nothing met your fancy, I take it?” she said in a tone that reeked of suspicion.

Jackie displayed a look of bewilderment at the fact that this woman was interrogating her. “No, not really. No point in buying something just for the sake of buying it, if you get what I mean.”

Mrs. Kalford continued to look for things that were out of the ordinary as Nathan realized that he needed to do something in order to get her to ease up. Separating her from Jackie was the only way out of the mess. He pulled out his phone to pretend to answer it.

“Hey, Griffin,” he said. “What’s up? I’m on the train headed back, and I’ll be home in about half an hour. Tell me about your day.” He spoke in a loud and obnoxious voice that put a barrier between the two women.

A few people gave him unfavorable glances, but this was enough of a societal cue to disinterest Mrs. Kalford and cause her to depart to another train car. Jackie gave him a fist bump after the nosy woman had gone away.

Though Jackie appeared to understand what his ploy had been, he felt a need to explain. “That woman is the biggest gossip at Seers Point and probably the whole town. It is best that she know as little as possible.”

“Oh, that woman was horrible,” Jackie affirmed. “She was looking at me like I was lying to her. Who does she think she is?”

“She has too much time on her hands, that’s for sure. Better still, she’ll be getting off at the same stop as us, so let’s not do anything she might use as gossip when we get off the train. She does live across the street from you,” Nathan added, who again didn’t like that he had to be the responsible one in this situation.

Jackie nodded in approval. This incident had been unfortunate, but it could’ve been a lot worse. Adversity in public was something that was to be expected, although not necessarily from a gossip juggernaut like Corrine Kalford. The two had handled this well.

They gave each other a hug before getting off the train. He was surprised that she’d give him a PDA after what had happened. Nathan felt a little sad that he wouldn’t be able to walk her to her car, but Mrs. Kalford would be on the prowl once again when they were in sight. They gave each other nothing more than a wave upon departing the train.

The night had been a success in Nathan’s mind, even with the Kalford encounter. He had seen outdoor theater with a woman he cared about, and managed to roll with the hurdles thrown his way. He thought Mrs. Buchanan would be proud of the way he’d handled the situations if she knew about his night.

Nathan returned home a little before ten. He found his aunt waiting for him in the living room. This came as a shock to him, as he’d been expecting Martin to be there watching
Cheers
reruns on Netflix. She did not look amused.

“Hi, Aunt Cassidy,” he said as he walked in.

She rose from the couch but didn’t move, which made Nathan uneasy. “Hello, Nathan, how was Griffin’s?”

He could sense she knew something was up, but there wasn’t much he could do about it so he decided to stick with the lie. “It was fun, but not too eventful, so I came home. I think I will get up early and swim tomorrow,” he said while trying to brace himself.

Aunt Cassidy let her head drop in disapproval. “It’s funny you should say that. We saw Griffin and his mothers at the club tonight having dinner. We didn’t see you there.”

He had figured this was coming from the moment she’d stood up. Part of him failed to understand why he hadn’t just switched his story, knowing what was going to come anyway, but that time had passed. He was not completely sunk as she didn’t know where he’d really been.

“Yeah, about that,” he said, preparing to use the same lie he had told Mrs. Kalford. Her gossip could work to his benefit if she corroborated the story he was going to tell his aunt.

He didn’t get to explain just yet. “Nathan, why would you lie about where you’d been? Do you realize how worried I was? Where were you?” she asked, displaying a mixture of anger and disappointment.

He needed a little more than what he’d told Mrs. Kalford to get him out of this mess. “I was in the city. I wanted some alone time so I went off and wandered around.” He tried to look as sincere as possible, though the guilt of lying like this actually aided his cause.

He’d given his aunt a story she could understand. “If you were going into the city, why didn’t you just say so? I don’t really understand why that’s something to lie about.” The anger had switched to confusion, though sadness remained.

He decided to play the ace he had in the back of his pocket. It wasn’t the soundest decision, but he knew it’d get his aunt off his case. He took and deep breath. “I don’t know, I guess I sometimes feel like you think I’m weird because of the things I do. Telling you I was with my friends was a lot easier than saying I was going to go exploring in the city by myself. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have lied.”

His stomach felt a little queasy as this explanation was a mean, low blow. He also struggled with the fact that it wasn’t entirely a lie, but he was manipulating the situation to his advantage so that it felt like a lie. He did often grow annoyed with his aunt’s odd concern for his activities, but it felt wrong to use that against her to get out of trouble.

“Oh, Nathan, I don’t want you to feel like that,” she said, teary-eyed. He looked away to avoid feeling any guiltier. “I just worry about you, you know. You had a rough childhood and your father is out of the country. I want you to have a normal life, that’s all. I don’t mean to make you feel like you’re weird or anything, honey.”

Nathan found himself with an opportunity to do some damage control. He was in the clear for his whereabouts and he needed to make his aunt realize that nothing was her fault. “Don’t be sorry. I just need my space sometimes. It’s good to just disappear for a bit and not worry about the outside world. I am really grateful for what you and Uncle Martin have done for me over the past year. You guys have been great.”

His aunt gave him a hug and wished him goodnight. He felt better after he’d contained the situation, but he still felt terrible that he had stooped to that kind of level to avoid trouble. He took a seat on the couch to think about what he’d done.

The damage he’d just caused made him reconsider what he was willing to do to continue seeing Jackie. He could care less about lying to Mrs. Kalford, or other interested parties who chose to prod around in his business. His family, Griffin for a time, and Mrs. Buchanan were all different stories. His aunt bugged him a lot, but he didn’t want to make her cry.

He wondered why coming clean about his relationship was such a crime against humanity. There was collateral damage on Jackie’s end with her husband, but he didn’t get why the fallout wouldn’t end after her divorce. Her being married was just the tip of the iceberg for the shock value of their relationship.

The choice that Nathan needed to make was about whether or not a relationship with Jackie was worth the amount of trouble and potential pain that the inevitable lying would cause. They had fun together, but it came at a steep price. On their first public appearance, they’d run into trouble. There was little doubt as to whether or not Mrs. Kalford would keep quiet. If other people saw them, the rumors would gain more traction.

He struggled to grasp why people would care what they did, but that didn’t make the cold reality any easier to stomach. There was a decision to be made lest he continue to hurt his aunt or lie to his friends. It didn’t have to be tonight, but he would need to pick between continuing what he had with Jackie, and a life without needing to make sure he had his story straight about his whereabouts.

While it was only eleven, Nathan climbed into bed for some therapeutic home improvement TV shows. He tried to imagine himself applying some of the ideas to Jerome’s house when he received a text message from Jackie.

Hey thanks again for tonight, I had a great time. I really like you, Nathan.

Amidst his confusion, he could at least sleep well that night knowing that it wasn’t all a teenage idealistic fantasy. It was real.

Chapter 20

Nathan and Griffin met for breakfast at a local diner. Griffin had wanted to meet at their club, but Nathan was worried about seeing Mrs. Kalford so soon after their last conversation. He was also worried she was spreading rumors about him.

He had not slept well the night before. Though the text from Jackie reaffirmed that he was at least acting out of genuine reciprocated affection, that didn’t change the decision he was currently facing with regards to their potential futures together. It actually made the matter worse.

He hesitated to share these thoughts with Griffin, though he did seek the advice of his best friend.

Griffin, who could basically read his mind from knowing him for so long, asked, “So, did you have a hot date with the Mrs. last night?”

Nathan didn’t bother asking how he’d known about his date. The only times the two didn’t text at night was when they were with women.

“It was something all right,” he said. “Hot might not be the best word.”

This answer gave Griffin the cue not to make any sorts of jokes that might add to the apparent grief of his friend. “Something bad happen?”

“Parts of it were great, though it ended early because Jackie’s son wasn’t feeling well. It was smooth sailing until that point. Then we ran into Corrine Kalford.”

Griffin shook his head in disapproval. “Well, that’s a surefire way to get yourself caught. Do you think she suspected anything?”

“Of course she did, but some quick thinking got rid of her,” Nathan said, thinking of his little stunt with the phone. “She certainly doesn’t have anything solid to go on, not that it’ll stop her from talking. Keep an ear out, though.”

Griffin still looked concerned. “You dodged a bullet last night, man. It didn’t miss you completely though. Kalford will be back, and if not her, it’ll be someone she’s corrupted. Your little thing with Jackie is going to get out, probably before the summer is over. The woman lives to spread stories.”

Griffin confirmed what Nathan had been thinking all along without any hints of jealousy or other negativity that might have clouded his judgment. Nathan still wasn’t sure what to make of it though. He wondered if Griffin could shed some more light on it.

“I don’t really know what to do,” he admitted.

“Well, I guess you’ve got to ask yourself the question of whether or not you actually care if people talk. I doubt you’re really going to be caught in the act of anything, so if a little gossipy chit chat doesn’t bug you, then I wouldn’t worry about it.”

This advice was practical, because he never cared what other people thought about him. The people who knew them were all club members, which only meant these were seasonal rumors. The talk would end by winter.

But then his compassion for the other participant kicked in. “What about Jackie? She’s got a lot more to lose than I do.”

Griffin shook his head. “That’s her problem, Nate. She’s a grown woman and you shouldn’t really feel the need to base your every decision off the worst case scenario for someone else. It’s good that you care, but really…she can take care of herself.”

He didn’t want to admit it, but Griffin had made more than a few good points. His decisions had an effect on Jackie, but he didn’t have any insider information, which might prevent her from seeing the blatantly obvious problems their relationship might bring to the table. A chat might be necessary with her regarding what had happened with Kalford.

“Permission to speak freely?” Griffin said, seeming to pick up on his hesitation.

This might not be something he wanted to hear, but he knew the value of outside insight from a person who knew him better than anyone else. He nodded.

“As long as I’ve known you, you’ve had a fear of commitment,” Griffin began. “You’re not exactly open to new people. I’m not saying that’s a bad thing, but it explains what you’re going through with Jackie. After what happened with Sarah, it makes sense that you’d be drawn to someone you can’t have. What you’re feeling now is reservation over the fact that you defied all logic and your uncertainty over how to deal with that.”

Griffin stood up to give his friend some time to process. He told him to text him if he needed anything, and left.

What had been said had all been true. Nathan wasn’t hostile to new people, but he wasn’t always the friendliest, and he often turned down requests to hang out one on one until he had a firmer grasp on the other person’s psyche. Griffin usually explained this sort of behavior as “Nathan being Nathan,” but he was protective of his friend.

He hated to constantly flip-flop on his feelings about what to do with Jackie but he also accepted the idea that it wasn’t an easy decision. This went beyond a simple yes or no. Yes meant going out of his way to end what had so far been a fairly substantial display of personal growth for his mind and body. No meant a continuation of nothing, a plan suggested by Mrs. Buchanan.

As he contemplated that idea further, he started to see why he naturally rebelled against complacency, which had served as a very viable option thus far. Choosing to remain with the status quo had not necessarily benefited him in the past, but that didn’t mean that it would hurt him in the now. Yet, he still felt weird when it came to thinking about it constantly.

After deciding to stick with the way things were and to make a conscious effort not to care what people thought about what they would never know really existed in the first place, Nathan headed to Seers Point to take a swim. He didn’t care if Corrine Kalford was there blabbing about his personal life. He only hoped she’d cease to continue popping up in places where she didn’t belong.

Nathan was pleased to find his club had not turned into a watering hole of gossip about him and Jackie. Mrs. Kalford wasn’t there, and if she’d talked about them, he couldn’t see any signs of it from the adults or from his peers. He was also pleased he was without the paranoia that he’d expected would come.

The next few days were surprisingly relaxing given the intense self-scrutiny he’d gone through over the past few days. He took this as a form of catharsis for all his negative feelings. He settled back into his usual summer routine. He went with Griffin to the occasional beach party and returned to the library a few times a week to visit Mrs. Buchanan.

Jackie hadn’t faded to a distant memory, but instead Nathan had carved a little niche for her in his life that wasn’t all encompassing or controlling. This made her a nice contrast to Sarah, who had forcibly tried to become the center of his existence, much to his own annoyance. By allowing himself to accept the fact that Jackie was a woman with three kids, he lived his independent life without feeling like he was doing anything wrong.

The improvement of his romantic life was seen by almost everyone around him. Griffin noticed he was more social at parties, his aunt saw him with an acceptable amount of his usual distance and weirdness, and Mrs. Buchanan could converse with him at the library without the fear that he might ask her for philosophical romantic advice. Nathan didn’t necessarily see it for himself, but he was maturing a bit.

One day, he was going through the Groupons he’d purchased on his computer. He had rock climbing, Crossfit, and a pack of t-shirts, which meant that he was required to take advantage of all three deals. He thought about whether Jackie or Griffin would like to accompany him on these adventures when he saw that someone had sent him a Skype invitation. It was Sarah.

The ring of the video call wouldn’t last forever, giving Nathan only a short window of time to react. He panicked after first, thinking that he’d ignore it, only to change his mind a few times as it rang. He put his hand to the mouse as if he wanted to let fate decide what to do. It wouldn’t have been out of the ordinary to just let it ring. Sarah had often done that when Nathan called her.

He clicked
accept
. Knowing Sarah, she had probably spent at least twenty minutes in the bathroom in order to get ready for the call. Nathan didn’t particularly care for more than a few reasons, but he indulged anyway.

“Hey, Nathan, how’s your summer been?” she asked with a big smile. “Do you miss me?”

He ignored the fact that it had only been a few weeks since he’d seen her last. “It’s been good. Relaxing. How’s your internship going?” He didn’t even notice that he’d disregarded her second question, which was likely the only one she cared about.

Sarah looked a bit different than the last time he’d seen her. She was tanner and had highlights in her hair. He had no doubt that both of these modifications were artificial. Sarah was fond of tanning booths.

“A lot of busy work. I basically get coffee and make photocopies. Not the glamorous time that father had promised me,” she replied, displaying the pretention Nathan had once been attracted to.

“That’s…good,” Nathan said, who was still somewhat uncomfortable with the vid-cam session. He knew she hadn’t just called him at random to chat.

Finally, she skipped the pleasantries and cut right to the point. “Look, Nathan, I want to talk about the way we left things.”

He glanced down as he replied. “Don’t you mean the way things ended?” He made no effort to sugarcoat his hostility.

This caught Sarah off-guard. “So, Nathan, you just want to throw away everything we had together? I’ll admit I acted a little rash that night. I was drunk and nervous about going away, but I feel really bad about it. It wasn’t like your actions were all high and mighty. You were an ass.”

There were at least a dozen things that he wanted to say to her at that moment in time. He didn’t feel any anger toward her. This conversation was nothing more than an ill-fated response to the loneliness felt by a girl who wasn’t having the summer of her dreams.

Instead of berating her, he said, “It’s over, Sarah. You know that and I know that. It’s okay. It wasn’t meant to be.”

Her sincerity seemed to turn to desperation. “No, Nathan, you can’t mean that. I’ll get my dad to buy you a ticket to come visit. You’re not doing anything anyway. Please just give us one more chance.”

His next reply was reactionary. “Sarah, I’m seeing someone else now.” It slipped right out of his mouth without as much as a second of thought. He dealt a swift blow to put her out of her misery brought out by incessant pleading. Nathan gasped at what he had just done, fearing a potential opening of Pandora’s Box. He hoped she wouldn’t have one of her friends try to figure out who had replaced her.

Sarah’s facial expression changed from desperation to immense anger. “Go fuck yourself, Nathan,” she said, before ending the call.

He was left in confusion at what he had allowed to slip out. His content feelings for his situation had disappeared instantly.

Or had they? Nathan stopped to consider that what he had said might not necessarily be the worst thing in the world. He hadn’t said who it was. Sarah might ask her friends to search around for information, but they weren’t going to find much unless they pinned Griffin down. He’d have to have a chat about this little slip with Griffin so that he knew not to disclose anything if he ran into Sarah’s friends at any parties. His bases were covered.

The only thing he was really concerned about was the notion that he’d let out private information. Sarah didn’t exactly hang out with the same crowd as Mrs. Kalford, but if he had revealed information like this at his club, then he’d have to deal with people wondering who this mystery girl was. He made a mental note to be more careful in the future.

Sarah had ended the call with hateful words, but he didn’t blame her. He’d moved on pretty fast, and he’d surprised her. Sarah might learn that she wasn’t quite the perfect girl she thought she was, but that wasn’t what Nathan had set out to do. He felt bad that he’d hurt her again.