Cimarron, Denver Cereal Volume 4 (16 page)

He wrapped his arms around her so that his
hands held the baby.

“
I can’t live in the dog
house forever. Help me be the person you need. Teach me how to be
your partner.”

“
I have to think,” she
said.

Sandy pulled on her clothing while Aden
watched. She was almost done when he pulled his pants on.

“
I still feel
stupid.”

She moved to leave. He grabbed her hand and
she looked up at him.

“
Why not feel brave?” Aden
said. “Sandy the lion hearted. You are incredibly
brave.”

“
Sandy the lion hearted?”
she laughed.

“
When you think of us,
Sandy, think of this,” Aden said. “No one is going to try harder
than I will. I want to be the very best person I can be – for you,
my children, but more than anything for myself. You’ve suffered
because of me. You have a right to be angry. But no man will ever
love you more than I do, fight harder to be your friend and
partner. No man.”

Unable to stop herself, Sandy’s eyes filled
with tears. Aden held her. When she was able to push her sorrow
away, he let go. He kissed her nose.

“
I have to get to work,” he
said. “Do you want to take some time?”

She nodded then turned to go. Slipping
around her, he caught her at the door. He kissed her in a way that
consumed her mind and ignited her body. She smiled.

“
Come back in about forty
minutes,” he said. “You can stay here until the kids get
up.”

“
They need to be up soon.
Nash has a soccer tournament today and tomorrow. Then we go to a
birthday party at one of those nasty cute girls’ houses,” Sandy
said. “Her mom invited both kids.”

“
I can’t tell you how much
I love hearing you mother Nash and Noelle.”

“
Sandy, the keeper of
schedules,” she smiled.

“
Thank you,” he
said.

“
For what?”

“
For giving me a chance,”
he said. “I will prove myself to you. You’ll see.”

Sandy gave him a soft smile and left the
apartment. Climbing the stairs to her apartment, she was overcome
with sorrow. She had to grit her teeth to keep from weeping in the
stairwell. She moved through the apartment to her shower. Under the
warm water, she wept.

~~~~~~~~

Saturday afternoon — 4:25 P.M.

“
Honey?”

Honey spun her wheelchair in place. Delphie
hadn’t spoken to her since she’d ‘died.’ It had been a week since
Johansen was killed, the Castle destroyed and Delphie had a stroke.
In the week, Honey had taken over planning the meals. Right now,
Honey was setting up for a family bar-be-que.

“
Delphie?” Honey
asked.

“
I wanted to ask you
something,” Delphie said.

Honey wondered if she should say something
about the ‘being dead’ thing or just let it go. She decided to just
smile. Delphie’s warm welcome into this life was one of the reasons
she’d moved in. Honey could return the favor.

“
I guess we haven’t spoken
in a while,” Delphie said.

“
I always like talking with
you, Delphie,” Honey said. “It’s one of the things I like about
living here.”

“
Is MJ home?”

Honey brightened at her husband’s name.

“
He’s home all week for the
sentencing.” She nodded. “Plus Alex wants to take care of her bees.
So they aren’t going anywhere.”

“
Do you have weekend
plans?” Delphie asked.

“
I’ve learned that when you
ask a question, you already know the answer,” Honey said. She
turned back into the refrigerator. “So you know that we’re staying
home this weekend. MJ is working with Jake on the Castle today.
Jill, Sandy and I have been working in the garden. Alex is coming
over on Sunday to teach me and Sandy how to take care of the
bees.”

“
I guess I knew that,”
Delphie said.

“
Tonight, we’re having a
bar-be-que,” Honey said. “Everyone’s coming: some of Val’s Denver
friends; my Mom and little sisters; Blane and Heather and little
Mack; Jill’s sister Meg and her kids; Steve and Leslie and their
brand new baby, Elisa; Jill’s other sister, Candy, and her Mom. I
guess Candy is living with Anjelika now. Anyway, everyone will be
here. We’re celebrating our lives, your survival, and Mike and
Val’s return to Prague.”

“
That’s what I wanted to
talk to you about,” Delphie said.

“
The
bar-be-que?”

Honey found the steaks Jill was marinating
in the refrigerator. Jill was always great about setting things low
enough for Honey to find them. Honey set the steaks on the counter
and turned back to the refrigerator to look for the chicken.

“
I wanted to talk to you
about being dead,” Delphie said.

Honey backed out of the refrigerator to look
at Delphie.

“
You and MJ… You both
died,” Delphie said.

Honey nodded.

“
I… Oh never mind,” Delphie
said. Delphie began walking out of the kitchen.

“
MJ says that Celia saved
his life,” Honey said.

Delphie stopped walking.

“
He says Celia made him
tourniquet his leg. He doesn’t know how he did it,” Honey said. “No
one’s really sure how he did it. But he did. If Celia hadn’t helped
him, he wouldn’t be my husband.”

Delphie stood still. She nodded and moved
toward the door. Honey wasn’t going to give up. Delphie wanted
something.

“
I remember dying,” Honey
said.

Standing in the doorframe, Delphie stopped
walking again.

“
Do you?” Honey
asked.

Delphie nodded.

“
It’s confusing, isn’t it?”
Honey asked. “I bet it’s really confusing for you. MJ and I, we’re
just people. No special powers, no sixth sense. We had this
experience and it’s like the deepest thing that’s ever happened to
us. But you have all these skills and powers. You’ve lived in both
planes for all your life. It would be really weird, I
think.”

When Delphie turned, Honey saw her lips
pursed. Delphie opened her mouth and closed it.

“
When I was first injured,
it was really hard to adjust,” Honey said. “It was like I walked
through this long hidden tunnel. Then whaa la, I’m on the other
side. But to everyone else, it was like a minute or two. At least I
looked like something happened to me.”

Honey gestured to her wheelchair.

“
Outside of your great new
haircut and the stitches on your leg, which no one can really see
because you wear those flowing dresses, you look the same,” Honey
said. “Even to yourself.”

Honey turned back to the refrigerator to
look for the chicken.

“
I see the change every
day. So does everyone else. That’s hard because I want to be
myself. Just me. MJ struggles with that too because of his leg,”
Honey said. “But in some ways, it’s a lot easier. Everyone knows
something happened to me. Of course, with the trial, everyone knows
a lot about me. There’s the chicken!”

Honey pulled the marinating chicken from the
refrigerator.

“
You look like you went to
a good hairdresser, not through death and back.”

When Honey set the chicken on the counter,
she saw that Delphie was crying. She wheeled over to Delphie and
held her arms out. Delphie dropped to her knees to hug Honey.

“
I bet Jake could talk to
you about this,” Honey said. “He has amazing gifts and he almost
died.”

“
Jake’s…” Delphie
shrugged.

“
Yeah, Jake’s a rock. He
doesn’t count,” Honey said.

Honey hugged Delphie until she sighed and
shifted back.

“
What was it like for you?”
Delphie asked.

“
It happened twice to me.
Once just over there.” Honey pointed to the spot near the long
stairwell where her sister had attacked her. “That time it was just
like bang. One minute I’m fighting with my sister and the next
minute I’m floating away. I saw MJ battling for my life and… I came
back to watch…mostly. I don’t think I knew I wasn’t dead until
later… like at Craig.”

“
And the other
time?”

“
Well, it wasn’t like they
say in the movies. No white light. No dramatic speeches or
anything. I remember being so, so sad. I’d just married MJ. Jake,
Sam, and everybody were becoming my first real family. I felt like
I had just gotten everything I’d ever wanted and it was taken from
me. Mostly, I didn’t want to leave the people I love. The first
time was so fast. But the second time… Man, I just have to think of
it and I feel that desperate sorrow again.”

Honey shook her head. Her eyes filled with
tears.

“
What sorrow?” MJ said as
he walked into the room. “What’s wrong?”

“
Dying,” Honey
said.

“
Oh hell, I felt that,” MJ
said. “God, I kept thinking about my sister and brother and how
screwed they would be. I felt so much regret for all the things I
hadn’t done… like make up with Honey or have a child
or…”

Rather than fumble through the rest of the
sentence, MJ shook his head.

“
Did you feel that sad?”
Honey asked.

Delphie nodded. MJ put his hand on Delphie’s
shoulder.

“
Jake,” MJ said to Jacob as
he walked in the door. “Did you feel sad when you almost
died?”

“
Sad? No. Horrible grief?
Yes. Why?”

“
I don’t know,” MJ said.
“Honey and Delphie were talking about it.”

Honey, Jacob and MJ looked at Delphie.
Delphie shook her head and stood up. She was about to walk out of
the room when Jacob reached her. He held her to him.

“
Thank you for staying. I
would have missed you so very much,” Jacob said.

Delphie began to cry.

“
What happened?” Valerie
asked. “Jacob Marlowe, what did you do?”

Without waiting for an answer, she hugged
Delphie. MJ lifted Honey from her chair so they could hug Delphie.
Coming into the kitchen, Sam saw the hug and without hesitation
joined. Jill and Sandy hugged Delphie. Katy squirmed her way
through the adults to hold on to Delphie’s legs. Noelle, Nash and
Aden held on. Even though Mike laughed when he saw the group, he
couldn’t help but hug Delphie too.

They held on to the woman they loved.

For the first time since her stroke, Delphie
held on too. After a moment, she sighed and they let go.

“
Now get out of my
kitchen,” Delphie said. “If it’s a celebration, I have some
cheesecake to make.”

And they laughed.

CHAPTER
NINETY-NINE
Stinky Trash

Friday mid-day – 12:11 P.M.

Jill closed her eyes. After a day of
sideways glances and whispers behind her back, she relished the
cool quiet of the fifth floor restroom at the Art Institute. She’d
thought she’d even made some friends in her first term of
college.

Today, she felt like she was a complete
outcast.

This morning was just another morning. She
had woken up with Jacob and helped him get to work at four-thirty.
She got Katy and went back to bed. She and Katy were sound asleep
when Jacob returned home an hour later. The horrified look on his
face told her more than his words:

“
Evette’s gone to the
press,” he said. “I wanted you to hear this from me.”

He held up today’s Denver Daily News. In big
bold letters, the headline read, “Denver’s own caught doing a
Tiger.” The article went on to say that Lipson Construction was
going to be investigated based on his ‘abuse of power.’ All of
Lipson’s city and state contracts, over half of their work, were
under investigation. Sam sent Jacob home for the morning until they
could figure out what to do.

Jacob had climbed into bed and pulled the
covers over his head. They had snuggled with Katy until Jill had to
leave for class. After all the drama of this term, she had to go to
class. She left Jacob and Katy in the loft at the Castle.

And twenty minutes later, she wished she
hadn’t.

Everyone knew.

Everyone assumed that whatever this Evette
said was one hundred percent true. Everyone!

In fact, she heard a woman whisper that she
had also had sex with Jacob not two weeks after their wedding. Jill
glanced at the woman with surprise when she mentioned a night that
Jill knew they had danced the night away at a fundraising gala.
Jacob was with her the entire night. But her mind wondered… when
she was in the bathroom, had he…? What about when she was checking
on Katy? No. He called to check on Katy. Or did he?

Megan gave her oldest sister advice - don’t
worry, don’t pay attention, just ignore them.

But who could do that?

Surely not Jill.

When Megan had to rush off to pick up a sick
child from the Marlowe school, Jill had escaped to the bathroom.
She planned to hide out until everyone left for lunch. Jacob was
working in his carpentry workshop. She would slip out of the
building and meet him. Together, they would decide what to do
next.

Or at least that’s what he said when she
called him from her stall.

She was about to get up from her hiding
place when she heard someone come into the bathroom. Jill jimmied
the lock so that no one could get in her stall. She lifted her feet
so that no one would know she was there.