Authors: Cheryl Douglas
“He didn’t waste any time moving in after
we broke up. I didn’t want to be that guy.”
She laughed. “You and Riley couldn’t be
more different if you tried.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“It was intended as one.”
He smiled. “Then you’re not interested in
him?”
“No, definitely not.”
It was nice to get the reassurance. “Glad
to hear it.”
She grasped his arm. “And for the record,
there was nothing between us. I went out with him a couple of times to try to
take my mind off you, but it didn’t work. I told him it was too soon for me to
think about getting involved with someone else.”
“He couldn’t have taken that well.”
“Actually, he was fine with it.” She
giggled. “He told me he could be patient because he knew our time would come.”
Jaxon rolled his eyes. “God, that guy’s
delusional.”
“Yeah, but he’s harmless.”
Jaxon wasn’t so sure about that, which was
why he intended to keep a close eye on him. “He better be if he knows what’s
good for him.”
* * *
Walking back into Jaxon’s penthouse after
all that time was bittersweet for Sela. She had so many memories in his place.
She’d even imagined she would be living there one day…
“Twenty for your thoughts,” he said,
wrapping his arms around her from behind when he closed the door.
“Isn’t that supposed to be a penny for your
thoughts?”
“Being able to read your mind would be
worth a lot more than that to me.”
She smiled as she leaned her head back on
his chest. “Big spender.”
“Tell me what you’re thinking, beautiful,”
he whispered, kissing her temple.
“Just being back here stirs up a lot of
memories.”
“Good or bad?”
“A little bit of both.” There was a time
when she would have been afraid to speak her mind with Jaxon. She had always
tried to please him, hoping if she said or did the right thing, he would admit
he loved her. But those words never came—until tonight. Could she believe him,
or was he just saying what he thought he had to say to get her back into his
bed?
“Can we focus on the good tonight?” he
asked, skimming her neck with his lips.
“We can’t pretend the bad never happened.”
It would be too easy to mentally erase the pain and anguish she’d felt, but if
she did, she could be setting herself up for more misery.
“Why not?”
“It’s a part of our history, Jax. An
important part.”
He kissed her hand as he led her into the
large living room. It was exactly as she remembered, a contemporary white-on-white
color scheme with a few punches of color for dramatic effect. The designer had
zeroed in on Jaxon’s need for minimalism while appreciating his preference for
the finer things.
“As beautiful as I remember,” she said,
appreciating the windows covering the south wall of his apartment.
“More beautiful,” he said, touching her
face with reverence.
She blushed at the compliment. “I was
talking about your apartment.”
“And I was talking about you.”
He kissed her softly, making it difficult
for her to tear herself away, but she had to. She’d meant it when she told him
she needed time to sort out her feelings. Given her history with Jaxon, they
couldn’t jump into a physical relationship, no matter how incredible the
short-term benefits would be.
“About that coffee… can I expect it anytime
soon or did you just use that as an excuse to lure me here?” she asked.
He laughed, looking happier and more
carefree than she’d seen him in a long time. She loved that she could make him
so happy, but she questioned whether it was possible for them to continue that
trend without hurting each other.
“Still a coffee hound, Sela?”
“There are worse things I could be addicted
to.” Caffeine was the only way she’d managed to get through the past four
years, between work and her studies. She thought school was tough the first
time around, but her parents had supported her decision to go to law school, so
they’d been happy to foot the bill. When she told them jewelry design was her
passion, they told her she was on her own to finance her dream.
“I can’t argue with that,” he said, leading
her into the kitchen.
Sela remembered a time not so long ago when
she’d been addicted to
him
. Once she started to heal, she’d vowed she’d
never go there again, yet she was back in his life. Was she a glutton for
punishment, or a woman who wanted to give the man she’d loved the benefit of
the doubt?
“Why do you look so serious all of a
sudden?” he asked, facing her as he waited for the single cup of coffee to
brew.
She was caught off guard. “No reason.”
“You’re a terrible liar.” He turned back
around to brew a second cup of coffee. “Would you like to try the truth now?”
“I question whether I’m crazy for being
here with you again.” Being honest with him felt good. Neither one of them had
excelled at that before. He’d been too guarded to be honest, and she’d been
afraid of falling too deeply and getting hurt.
The spoon over his mug froze as he looked
at her. “Don’t do that. Please. We’re here because we both want to be. Don’t
overanalyze it. Let’s just enjoy it.”
She reached for her coffee, thinking how
easy it would be to get lost in the moment and let fate guide them. She’d never
been big on taking the easy way though.
“You’re still doing it,” he said, looking
somber. “Why?”
“You can’t ask me to just forget. Too much
has happened.” She poured a drop of milk into her coffee and stirred while his
eyes bored into her. “I’ve cried too many tears, devoted too many months of my
life to getting over you…” She was sacrificing her pride to tell him how hard
it had been, but the only way out of the pain was through it.
“You think it was easy for me?” he asked,
captivating her with the raw emotion in his voice. “You think I didn’t shed
tears? That I didn’t tear this place up, put my fist through the walls in my
office… or think about wrapping my bike around a tree? You think I wasn’t
bleeding on the inside, Sela?”
“Maybe you’re not the same guy you used to
be.” She wanted to believe more than anything that losing her had changed him.
“Nothing has been the same for me since you
walked out the door. Nothing.”
She slowly expelled a breath as she fixed
her eyes on the countertop. She couldn’t look at the pain in his eyes. It would
break her, and she had to stay strong. If he really had changed, time would
prove it. Rushing back into a relationship with him would only prove she was a
fool.
“Let’s take this into the living room,” he
said when she didn’t respond. He reached for her coffee as well as his and set
them down on the glass coffee table while she settled on the couch. He sat and
pulled a velvet cushion out from beneath him, tossing it aside so he could move
closer to her. “So tell me about this new job of yours.”
Sela was mesmerized by his proximity. He
wasn’t invading her personal space, but if she leaned in a fraction of an inch,
he would too, and it would be game over. He’d always been a difficult man to
resist, but the softer, gentler Jaxon was practically impossible to refuse.
“The job?” he asked, handing her the coffee
cup.
“Oh, uh, right.” She lowered her head when
she felt her cheeks grow warm. If only he knew what she’d been thinking. “It’s
a great opportunity. A one-year paid internship with a company famous for
featuring exciting new jewelry designers. I thought I’d have to relocate for a
position like this, but it’s right in my own backyard, which is amazing.”
“I couldn’t agree more.” He sipped his
coffee and looked at her over the rim of the white ceramic mug. “I’d hate like
hell for you to leave town now when we’re finally
reconnecting
.”
The way he said the word made it sound so
intimate, or maybe it was the way his long fingers cradled the mug, reminding
her of how many times he’d used them to bring her ecstasy… She closed her eyes,
hoping that without the sight of him, the memories would be less poignant. But
when she did, he inched closer, and the familiar scent of his cologne conjured
up a whole new scent of memories. Like the way she used to kiss and lick his
neck as he pressed her into the mattress…
“You’re thinking about what it felt like
when we made love,” he whispered, his breath teasing her hair. “I am too. In
fact, I can’t get it out of my head.”
He took her cup and set it on the table.
Sela was grateful. Another minute, and she would have been wearing it. She
wanted to tell him to stop torturing her, but the words wouldn’t come. She felt
his face in the crook of her neck, his tongue licking the hollow that always
made her squirm.
Stop,
her mind screamed, but her body said,
Go, go,
go!
She fisted her hands at her sides, refusing to touch him. He popped the
first button of her blouse, his mouth moving to the opening before he popped
another.
“Jax…” If he wasn’t such a skillful lover,
she could easily say no, but rejecting him was akin to punishing herself. No
man could make a woman feel the way he could. “We should—”
“You’re right, we should.”
She could tell his lips were curved into a
smile as he pressed them against her skin. He was so cocky, so sure of himself,
probably because no woman had ever been stupid enough to reject him. But there
was a first time for everything. “I’m not ready for this.”
He retreated, searching her eyes. “I’m
sorry. I didn’t mean to push.”
“It’s okay.” She rested one hand on his
shoulder. “We got carried away, that’s all.”
“I should probably get you home.”
She reached for his hand when he stood.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to lead you on.”
“You didn’t, baby.” He kissed her hand. “I
never could keep my hands off you, but if that’s what it takes to prove myself
to you, I’ll take cold showers for as long as it takes. Days, weeks, months, it
doesn’t matter, because I intend to have every night for the rest of my life
with you.”
Dylan slammed Jaxon’s office door as
he stared his friend down. “You wanna tell me what the hell you were thinking
taking Sabrina to Kiki’s wedding? I thought you were into Sela. If you’re using
Sabrina to make Sela jealous, I’m warning you—”
“Are you crazy?” Jaxon asked, caught off
guard by his partner’s hostility. Dylan was the easy-going one who never let
anything get to him. Jaxon couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen him so
worked up. “Sabrina and I are just friends. She suggested I take her to the
wedding; I didn’t ask her to go with me.”
Dylan scowled. “Why would she do that? Oh
hell, is she into you? Did she give you the impression she was? Did anything
happen between y’all?”
Jaxon pointed at one of the chairs on the
other side of his desk. “Sit down, shut up, and listen.”
“You better tell me what I wanna hear,
man.”
Dylan collapsed in the chair, and for the
first time, Jaxon noticed the shadows around his eyes. “Didn’t you sleep last
night?”
“Don’t you answer your goddamn phone
anymore?”
“Yeah, I noticed I missed your calls. I was
with Sela.”
“Sela?” Dylan seemed to relax after he
heard that his friend hadn’t changed course. “You were with Sela?”
“Yeah.” Jaxon smirked. “Does that make you
feel better?” Sabrina had been a fixture at High Rollers for so long that most
of the partners treated her like one of the boys, but he sensed Dylan felt
differently. “Are you into Sabrina?”
“You answer my questions first,” Dylan
said. “Why did Sabrina want to go to the wedding with you?”
“She was being a good friend. She knew I
didn’t want to go alone and I didn’t want to take a real date because Sela
would be there, so she volunteered. Sabrina’s always had a good relationship
with Sela and Kiki, and I think she wanted to see her friend tie the knot.
That’s it, end of story.”
“You’re sure there’s nothing more to it?”
Dylan asked. “Nothing else happened?”
“No, she drove her own car and left before
I did. She said she had some big meeting the next morning. How did you even
know we went together?”
“I ran into her friend at the bar last
night. She told me.”
Jaxon smirked. “That explains why you were
burnin’ up my phone ‘til one in the mornin’. Why didn’t you just ask Sabrina
about it?”
“I can’t let her know I care,” Dylan said,
blowing out a breath. “She thinks of me as a friend, nothing more. She’s told
me that a dozen times.”
Jaxon was surprised. Women rarely looked at
Dylan as friend material. He was ridiculously good looking, even from a guy’s
perspective. He’d played professional football until a knee injury took him out
of the game, and High Rollers had made him successful beyond reason.
“Really? You sure about that?” Jaxon asked.
“Of course I’m sure,” Dylan said, looking
irritated. “You think I’d be sitting back doing nothing if I thought I had a
chance with her? She’s shot me down one too many times already.”
“I wish I’d known,” Jaxon said. “I could
have talked to her about it, figured out where her head was at.”
“No!” Dylan raised a hand. “Don’t say
anything to her about this. I don’t want her to feel pressured, and I sure as
hell don’t want her to stop coming into the bar because she feels
uncomfortable.”
“So what are you gonna do?” Jaxon felt for
his friend’s plight. At least he knew Sela was attracted to him. Last night had
reinforced that.
“I don’t know what the hell to do,” Dylan
admitted, looking dejected. “I’ve tried to be there for her, be her friend, but
it seems like that plan backfired. Now she sees me as a big brother or
something.”
Jaxon laughed at the absurdity of that
suggestion. He’d seen Dylan and Sabrina slow dance after she’d had a few
drinks. No way did she think of him as a brother. “I don’t think so, buddy.”
“Okay. Maybe she sees me as her brother’s
friend or something.”
“You are her brother’s friend,” Jaxon
reminded him. “Does Dalton know how you feel about her?”
“No, God, no.” Dylan looked horrified.
Dalton and Dylan were former teammates, and Dalton was a defensive lineman who
Dylan often joked weighed as much as a refrigerator. “Whatever you do, don’t
say anything to Dalton about this. He’d have my ass.”
“You’re a good guy,” Jaxon argued. “Dalton
knows that. Could be he’d put in a good word for you with his sister. It
couldn’t hurt to talk to him about it.”
“Yeah, it could. It could hurt a lot.”
Dylan smirked. “Seriously, I’m not afraid of Dalton, but I need to work this
thing out with Sabrina on my own. I don’t want her to feel pressured into going
out with me.”
“Fine, play it your way.” It was pointless
to argue with Dylan when he’d made up his mind about something.
“Tell me about you,” Dylan said. “What’s
going on with Sela? You said you were out with her last night. How do you think
her boyfriend would feel about that?”
“She doesn’t have a boyfriend anymore.”
Jaxon shouldn’t take pleasure in something that obviously caused Sela pain, but
he couldn’t help being happy that she was a free agent again.
“Wow.” Dylan checked his shiny diamond
watch. “That must be a new record for you. It usually takes you at least a
month to lure them away from the husband or boyfriend.”
“Don’t be an ass,” Jaxon said, glaring at
his friend. Jaxon had never been the odd man out before, and he wouldn’t have
put himself in the line of fire if it hadn’t been for Sela. “He broke up with
her, not the other way around. Apparently he didn’t think she was as committed
as she should be to the relationship.”
“His loss is your gain, right?”
“I hope so. We’re still testing the waters,
but I think we’re getting closer.” If their passionate kiss good night was any
indication, they’d be back together in no time. “I just have to be patient and
let her decide when the time is right.”
“And you’re okay with that?”
Jaxon gave him an incredulous look. “Man,
this is Sela we’re talking about. I’m just grateful she’s talking to me at
all.”
“You should be,” Dylan concurred. “So does
she know you got Joe to fire her so she could come work here?”
“No, and don’t you dare tell her.”
Dylan chuckled. “Keepin’ secrets from her
already, man? Not a good plan.”
“I’m gonna tell her, just not yet.”
“Didn’t you learn anything from the mess
Grayson got himself into with Alana? He almost lost her because he wasn’t
honest with her. For most women, that’s a deal breaker, and after everything
you’ve been through to get Sela back, I’d hate for you to lose her because you
weren’t upfront.”
“You’re right.” Jaxon thought about how and
when he could break that bit of news to her. “I’ll tell her. I swear I will. I
just need to find the right time.”
Dylan stood. “Just make sure you tell her
before she hears it from someone else.”
“Who else would tell her?” Jaxon asked,
feeling uneasy. “The only people who know are you, me, Joe, and Marlie, and I
trust y’all not to tell her.”
“Okay,” Dylan said, reaching for the
doorknob. “Just don’t waste too much time, Jax. Secrets always have a way of
comin’ back to bite ya in the ass.”
Jaxon frowned at the closed door. Dylan was
right. He had to find the right time to tell Sela the truth and hope she would
forgive him.
* * *
Sela sat across from Riley, wiggling her
toes as she kicked off her high-heeled shoes under the table. “Oh man, it feels
good to sit down. It’s been crazy busy tonight.”
“Must be because of the game.” Riley hooked
a finger over his shoulder at the big screen behind them before he reached for
her legs. “Here, put your feet up. Relax for a while. I took the liberty of
ordering you a drink. I knew you’d only have a few minutes to kick back.” He
nodded toward the soda in front of her.
“Thanks.” Sela felt uneasy when he massaged
her arch, but she couldn’t deny it felt amazing. She tried to pull her foot
away. “It’s okay. You don’t have to do that.”
“I want to,” he said, winking at her.
“You’ve been in a lot lately.” Sela had
agreed to have a drink with him so she could tell him she wasn’t interested in
picking up where they’d left off a year ago. Riley was a decent guy, or at
least he pretended to be, but he wasn’t her type.
“I have good reason now that you’re workin’
here.” He grinned as he dug his thumb into her instep.
She lifted her butt off the seat, torn
between pain and pleasure. “About that…” She took a long drink of the soda he’d
ordered for her. She hadn’t realized how thirsty she was until she drained half
the glass.
“Yeah?” He lifted an eyebrow. “What about
it?”
“I don’t want you coming in here on my
account.” When he frowned, she added, “Of course you’re free to come in
whenever you want. It’s a free country, and I know you’re a valued customer and
all, but—”
“But your boyfriend doesn’t want me sniffin’
around you, is that it?”
“I don’t have a boyfriend anymore,” she
said, trying to placate him. She wanted to be honest with Riley, but she didn’t
want to cost her employers business. “Sheldon and I broke up a few days ago.”
“I wasn’t talkin’ about that boyfriend,”
Riley said as he began working on her other foot.
Sela was decidedly uncomfortable with the
way his touch made her feel… hot.
But before she could ask him to stop, a
waitress passed by their table. “You didn’t get your break earlier, Sela. You
should take thirty now.”
Sela feared she might be reduced to a
puddle on the floor by then. “It’s okay, fifteen is good. I know how busy we
are.” She took another drink as Becky ran off to tend to another table.
“I was talkin’ about Jaxon.”
Sela looked at Riley, confused as she tried
to remember what they’d been talking about. “My head.” She rubbed her eyes. “It
feels kind of funny.” She reached into her bag, hoping she’d find a pain
reliever buried at the bottom of her purse.
“No better pain reliever than this,” Riley
said, obviously trying to distract her by working his magic on her instep.
Sela let her eyes drift closed. “That feels
so good. I should stop wearing these shoes to work.”
“But they look so damn sexy,” Riley said,
gliding his calloused hand up her bare leg. “Course, you’d look sexy in
anything… or nothing.”
“What the hell’s going on here?” Jaxon
demanded, fisting his hands on the table.
Sela opened her eyes to see Riley leering
at her and Jaxon looking ready to commit murder. “I was just telling Riley…”
What
had she been about to tell Riley?
“Seems our girl here has a bit of a
headache, Jax,” Riley said. “You should think about givin’ her the rest of the
night off.”
“Is that true?” Jaxon’s rage turned to
concern in a split second.
“I was feeling fine up until a minute ago.”
She reached for another drink of her soda. “I haven’t had time to eat today.
Maybe I’m just hungry and a little dehydrated.” She held up her near-empty
glass. “I’m sure this will help. I’ll be fine in a minute.” Her skin felt
prickly, and she squirmed when Riley’s hand glided farther up her leg. “God,
yes…”
“What the hell is with you?” Jaxon
demanded, reaching for her chin. He turned her head toward him. “Have you been
drinking?”
“No.” She tried for outrage but failed
miserably when her voice came out husky. “Of course not. This is all I’ve had
tonight.” She looked at Riley, wondering why he seemed so out of focus. “Don’t
stop. That feels
so
good. Higher.”
The murderous look returned to Jaxon’s eye
as he turned his attention to Riley. “Take your goddamn hands off her before I
knock all your teeth out.”
Looking smug, Riley said, “Why don’t you
ask Sela if that’s what she wants?”
“I’m gonna kill you, you worthless
bastard,” Jaxon said, lunging for Riley.
Jaxon was on top of Riley, dragging him out
of the booth and punching him in the face. He landed several solid punches
before one of the waitresses shouted for the bouncers to break up the fight. It
all happened so fast, Sela didn’t have time to scream.
“Get him out of here,” Jaxon shouted at the
man who pulled him off of Riley. “I don’t ever want to see his face in here
ever again!”
“You’re not above the law, Davis!” Riley
shouted as two bouncers ushered him out. “You won’t get away with this!”
“Do you need anything, boss?” a waitress
asked, gesturing to Jaxon’s lip. “An ice pack, maybe?”
Jaxon swiped his hand across his mouth,
narrowing his eyes when his hand came away bloody. “No, I’m good.”
Sela was too stunned to move as she tried
to process what had just happened. “Are you okay? You’re bleeding.” She felt as
if a mouthful of cotton was preventing her from forming the words.