Chasing the Wild Sparks (23 page)

I glance over to the bar where Finn is talking to two women. They’re standing close to him, laughing and chatting with them enthusiastically; nothing that I haven’t seen before, but his grin is genuine, not a manufactured one. He’s so fucking sexy and those women want him. I do notice his eyes fly over their heads to monitor me before Rod dips me the traditional way, my leg sliding up his. Is Finn working
me
now? Is he trying to make
me
jealous? He’s going to have to do more than talk to women to make me jealous, since I’m quite used to him being inundated with them.

I let go of Rod and dance close around his body. My hands wander over his chest and back, while wheeling my hips around and knocking into him. He grabs both of my hands and twirls me under his, twisting our hands over and under. He then unwinds me and I stretch our arms out, shimmying back to him. Morgan claps and dances around us. She’s also one of our biggest cheerleaders, but usually from afar. She doesn’t let Rod see her make a big production of how much she loves our dancing, so this is a rarity for her to do.

Rod whirls me and wraps his arms around me, quickly swinging us to the incredibly fast rhythm. He’s kept it a lot more descent this time since we have an audience and refrained from the hip popping, crotch shots, and the ass riding. I guess I did ride him, though. Oops.

A slow song comes on. Morgan points over to our table as she moves off the dance floor. Rod lets go of me and he gives me a questioning look. I put my arms around his neck and pull my body closer to his, facing away from the bar and from Rod’s chest hair.

He leans into my ear. “Did you do all that to make Wilder jealous?”

I cringe. “Yes. Sorry.”

He shrugs his shoulders underneath my arms. “It’s okay. I thought you were a little less…inhibited.” He chuckles. “Do you think he’s jealous?”

“He says he’s not, but I think he’s lying.”

“How could he not be? He had to watch his woman dirty dancing with another man, Hadley. I kind of feel bad now.”

“He’s getting drunk anyway.”

“Because of you.”

I lift my head from his chest and look at Rod doubtfully. “Me?”

He narrows his eyes at me and looks at me like I’m crazy for not knowing why. “He’s in love with you. I mean, he did all of that to find you.”

I raise an eyebrow. “It wasn’t that hard for Ricky to search for Morgan’s plate and car.”

“Still, he had him do it. For you.”

I pull my arms down so my hands are at the top of Rod’s arms. “What should I do?”

He glances over to where Finn was standing earlier, but I don’t look. He slides his gaze back down to me. “Why don’t you go ask him to dance?”

I shake my head. “He won’t.”

“He might. Fuck, I bet he will. He probably feels left out.” He shrugs again and looks around us. “I don’t know.”

I hesitantly peek at Finn, who is sitting on a stool where he’s holding court, surrounded by even more female Finnatics now. One even boldly has a hand on his shoulder, her fingers stroking the top of his chest, while leaning close to him. The hair on the back of my neck stands.
I
should only be that close to him. He looks buzzed, but still coherent and a smile on his face.

I growl, “He’s in the middle of a fan club meeting.”

He laughs. “All the better! Like Morgan says, ‘Show those bitches that Finn Wilder is
your
man.’”

“Why do you care how he feels right now, Rod? He was going to annihilate you earlier.”

Rod lightly swings us to the song and regards me before saying, “I care because I care about you. I want you to be happy, Hadley.”

I smile. “Rod, that’s so sweet.”

Rod looks down between us. “I mean it. You two belong together. Married or not.”

I observe Finn once more. He’s doing more shots while his harem cheers him on.

I swiftly hug Rod and whisper into his ear, “Thank you, Greg. You’re the best.”

He hugs me back and blows out a sigh next to my ear. “No prob. I’ll grab us some more beers in case you’ll need one.”

Fuck that. I might need what Finn’s having.

CHAPTER 15

I take a deep breath as I stride over to the small crowd and bravely squeeze through. Finn’s smile drops and his eyes seem to glaze over, his jaw strongly clenching. His Finnatics clamber to get his attention back, but his eyes don’t leave my face. The women around him look like models posing with him for his next
Wild Side
segment. How do I compete with them?

Wanting to show them who Finn Wilder belongs to, I daringly step forward into the gap between his knees, and he slightly opens his legs wider so I can stand between them. I boldly put my hands on his legs and slide them up along his gray suit pants to the top of his thighs. A few of the women gasp and complain about my brazenness. I want to yell at them that I saw him naked this morning. I think I hear one of them call me a whore. Wow. It’s different when it comes from someone other than Morgan or Rod.

I unflinchingly lean close to him and his quickening alcohol breath blows across my face. I self-consciously smile and ask, “Finn Wilder, will you dance with me?” He glances down to my lips and he swallows, his Adam’s apple sliding up and down, before his lips part. I hear a few of his Finnatics scoff and laugh. That makes me wonder how many of them had asked, but were turned down.

The plucky bleach-blonde with huge tits, holding onto his arm huffs, “Finn doesn’t dance. Believe me. We’ve already tried, honey.” Is this bitch his spokeswoman?

“Oh.” I look down, trying to appear dejected. Somehow, I know Finn’s gaze has dropped with my own and I feel his solid muscles tensing beneath my fingers. I bring my eyes back up, and as I correctly guessed, bringing his back up with me. “Please, baby?” I slide my bottom lip into a delicate pout. I hear more snickering and a few more names being tossed around. Finn doesn’t say anything or take his eyes off of me. What’s he thinking now? Is he really turning me down? I guess I wasn’t prepared for that. I’m not even sure why I wasn’t. Why would he change his mind about dancing with me all because I’m his girlfriend?
Am I still
? Does he really think I broke up with him? Has he let me go? He tried to dance a little with me earlier, but now I’ve indubitably pissed him off even more by dancing with Rod again.

I feel the sting of rejection spreading through my veins like a malicious drug. I’m fully aware of that burning effect on a daily basis. Slowly and unwillingly, I drag my fingers down his legs, utterly horrified that I tried this in front of such gorgeous, younger women. My fingers graze his knees and I experience the blatant threat of tears. Not now! Not again... I rapidly blink to fight them off and I make the mistake of looking into his eyes to see that nothing’s there. I don’t see any emotion, like he doesn’t give a fuck anymore. This is it. He’s had his fill of my bullshit.

I glance anxiously at the women around me, who are all smiling like sharks that have trapped their meal. I can’t believe I did this. I’m so stupid. Of course he was going to reject me. That’s what Finn Wilder does best. However, this time the pain is so much sharper because he rejected me in front of people that he wouldn’t have introduced me to in the first place; therefore, rejecting me twice in one swift blow to the heart. I so much want to die right now.

Hearing tittering and heckling from his admirers, I move back and lift my hands from his legs. Suddenly, Finn reaches down and clutches my wrists. Leaning forward, he tugs my arms back up along his legs, pulling my upper body closer. He releases a wrist, grips the back of my head, and brings my face roughly to his, kissing me hard and in front of his fan club. I vaguely hear murmuring around us as Finn makes a show of licking my bottom lip and then thrusting his tongue forcibly into my mouth, the taste of whiskey engulfing me, and mixed with Finn’s flavor, it’s the best thing I’ve ever sampled. I’m beyond stunned. I never expected him to do this in a million years. Although he’s most likely drunk, he actually kissed me so explicitly…
first
…right in front of his devotees. He kissed me at the track, but not with women actually hanging on him.

He lets go of my other wrist and holds my bare arm, stroking my skin with his fingers, leaving a blazing trail. I grip onto his thighs, my fingers wanting to migrate between his legs, but I have to remind myself we’re not at home. I kiss his lips fervently and he, equally as passionate, kisses me back, firmly holding my head to his.

Reluctantly, I haul my lips from his, stopping our makeout session before it gets way out of control; however, his eyes flit heavily over mine and he drives my lips back onto his. I lift my knee and prop it on the stool between his legs, hoping nobody sees my underwear. He shifts, brushing his groin against my knee, and I can feel his groan reverberating throughout my mouth. He drops his hand from my arm and strokes the inside of my thigh up to the hem of my skirt. Now I do have to end this before our spectacle either gets him fired, or Ricky having to arrest his best friend.

I pull away, but kiss him once more before transiently peering at the women around us. The blonde on his shoulder is long gone. Most of the others left, but the ones remaining are ready to claw my eyes and yank my hair out.

With his hand still on my thigh, creeping under the hem, I give a small smile to our audience, feeling a little embarrassed now, even though I had started this. I turn my head to his and he’s staring at me with a ridiculous grin on his face. Must be the liquor.

Finn grabs my hand and shifts to stand. I move my leg as he slides off his stool. He politely smiles at his remaining Finnatics. “Sorry, ladies. I’m going to dance with my girlfriend of three years now, who I’m madly in love with. Thanks for the company, though.” His sexy grin temporarily changes the evil stares to giggles and sighs. I dazedly smile in happy shock. Looking back down to me, he puts both of his hands on either side of my face, bending to kiss me sweetly. He takes my hand again and leads me out to the dance floor just in time for another slow song to start.

The club’s lights have been brought down to only a few white lights aimed down onto the dance floor, which is a different effect for after midnight, creating a more intimate ambiance for slow dances and a mysterious mood for fast ones. Finn takes us over to the far corner of the floor. Is he that nervous about slow dancing? He coils his arms around me and before I can put my arms around his neck, his lips are on my collar bone. My hands don’t make it down to his shoulders, but dig into his already-fucked-up hair. His kisses turn to hard sucking as he moves a hand up to my necklace, clutching my key. He’s making good on his word of giving me a love bite. Once he’s satisfied with making sure I have a large bruise, he trails his lips up to the base of my neck and sucks there. I move my head down to dissuade him, but he keeps going. There’s no way I’m going to be able to stop him now.

He finally lets go of my necklace, lifts his lips off of me to whisper in my ear, “That was so fucking hot what you did back there.”

“What did I do?”

“You took a gamble and declared me as yours in front of other women,” he says breathlessly. “You were telling them to back off. I fucking loved it.”

“I only asked you to dance with me.”

“You had your hands on me.”

“So did that bitch.”

“Jealous are we?” he asks mockingly.

I mutter, “Yes.”

“Me, too, baby. I’m sorry.” He
is
jealous? Why? I don’t have a huge following!

“He’s my friend, Finn. I’m not in love with him. I’m in love with
you
.”

“Oh, Becks.” He shakes his head and hesitates. “I was so afraid that you were breaking up with me.” He sucks air between his teeth. “I never meant to hurt you. I panicked. I hadn’t introduced you to anyone besides my family before. Rita knew you were my girl. She reamed my ass for not telling anyone about you. I’m such a dick. That’s all I can say in my defense.”

I’m confused. “How did she know who I was? Did you tell her first?”

“No. She said that she saw it in my eyes and on my face.”

“Saw what?”

He gazes down at me, his expression solemn. “My love for you. She asked me how long I have been in love with you.” He smiles as we sway together. “I told her three years. She nearly had a stroke.”

“What did she say when you told them my name is Becks?”

He shakes his head. “I didn’t. You’re
my
Becks.
Nobody
else’s.”

He’s not going to tell anyone my name? “So, you left me nameless?”

Narrowing his eyes, he says, “No.” Oh?

“You actually told them my name?”

“Yeah.” I want to hear him say it, but I’d better not ask him to right now. Shit. It might be like a grenade.

“I’ll tell everyone your name and who you are. I won’t hide you anymore, baby. I only did it to keep you to myself and to protect you from my public life. I’m so sorry.”

“I want to be part of your life, Finn—good or bad. I don’t want to be left out or kept in the dark.” He nods and my gaze falls to his full lips before returning to his guilt-ridden brown eyes. “And, I want to share my life with you, even though mine is boring.”

He chuckles and shakes his head. “Don’t say that. Sometimes excitement is overrated.” He sighs, the whiskey invading the space between us. “I want you to be a part of my life, baby. I don’t want to live my life without you. I want us to share our lives together. I know it’s lame and cliché, but you’re the air that I breathe.” I smile and look down to his chest as tears sting my eyes again. Am I finally getting through to him? Will he soon change his mind about other things, too? I don’t want to push my luck, though. I just want to enjoy this small victory.

I move my hands so I can stroke my fingers against the nape of his neck. Peeking up at him, I see him staring down at me. I say, “Same here, baby. To also risk being cliché, without you, my heart painfully aches. You’re my missing puzzle piece.” I rest my head against his chest and glance up. His head is inclined over mine and I see his lips spread into a smile as he rocks us slowly to the song. I’m impressed that he’s trying these things for me that he said he never would. “I love dancing with you, Mr. Wilder.”

I feel his small laugh and he clears his throat. “I didn’t know you could dance like that…with Rodwell.”

I straighten and study the tie I bought for him. “How much did you see?”

“A lot.”

“Oh.” Yikes. “You weren’t really going to punch him, were you?” I bite my lip, fearing the answer.

He raises his head as I slightly pull back from him so I can see his face. He regards me momentarily before resolutely saying, “Positively, and then rip his balls off.”

I look up at his baby face. “Finn.” I notice he suddenly looks tired. “Why were you that mad about us dancing in front of a crowd?”

He glances over my head, like he can’t look at me as he makes his confession this time. “I can’t tell you what I was thinking because I was numb. I thought I’d see you dancing, but not like that and not with Rod. I couldn’t believe it was the two of you.”

I sigh and skate my hand to his jaw, stroking his prickly hair. “I’m sorry. Rod and I always dance together at the firm’s parties. It’s our thing, I guess. You’re just not there to see us. It’s fun.”

“It was hard for me to watch,” he confesses, while still avoiding looking me in the eye. I nod as I stare at his jaw, feeling the tension underneath my fingers. He continues, “You two looked great together, which at first, shocked the hell out of me. And then someone nearby commented that you and Rod must have a hot sex life. That enraged me. I thought maybe I had been missing something and that you belonged with him instead of me.”

I shake my head, and slide my thumb over his bottom lip. He lowers his head, pushing his lip against my thumb and closes his eyes. “No. I love
you.
There’s no comparison.” The smell of alcohol encircles me as he heavily sighs and tightens his grip on me.

Abruptly, he stands straight and I move my hands from his lip to his biceps, where his tattoos are hiding. His eyes scour my face and then down to my chest. He says, “I didn’t mention how fucking sexy you look, did I?” What?

“No. I do?” I look like a streetwalker on payday.

“I saw the pictures and I didn’t know it was you at first with all the heavy makeup. I didn’t know why I was getting pictures of some woman on my phone, or who they were from. I looked again trying to figure out who it was when I realized it was my Becks.” He looks down and I can hear him swallow through the music. “Morgan nailed it.”

I examine his face in uncertainty. “What do you mean?”

Finn looks up, his eyes weary. “I couldn’t concentrate at all. I kept stammering, messing up scores and not reading the teleprompter right. I blamed it on my contacts. Our director, Alan, told me to get the surgery already. There’s no way I’m doing that.” My daredevil can get tattoos and jump off buildings, but not have corrective eye surgery. A pained look traverses his handsome face. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you out dancing somewhere and getting hit on. And since I’ve been such an asshole to you, I thought that you might leave me. I was so pissed off. It was driving me fucking crazy.” Hesitantly, he peers at me again.

“Rod wouldn’t have let that happen anyway. He’s protective of me, too, Finn. You may think he’s just a goofy guy, but he’s a great friend to me. He’s like a brother. He wouldn’t have allowed anyone to do that.” I playfully smile. “I think he could take you on.” I giggle as his big laugh vibrates the air between us.