Chase the Storm (8 page)

“Thanks, love you too,” I scowled, wiping his spit off my forearm. He pawed at the ground, then stomped it when a fly landed on his knee. His tail constantly swished back and forth as he watched me with large, curious eyes. “I’mfixingthe gate, hopingit might cheer Chase up.”
I repeated the process on the other two hinges. Dropping the wrenchand screwdriver into the box, I stood up.
“Time to test it out,” I said to Lakota, who’d grown bored watching me and begun grazing. Holding the top rail, I tentatively stepped onto the bottom one, waiting for it to sink, or worse, fall off completely. When it did neither, I moved up another rail and paused again. The hinges held, and the gate was leveland solid.
“I did it!”I jumped off, prettydamned proud ofmyself.
I could hear the tractor and knew Chase was probably returning for lunch. Deciding to help out, I returned the toolbox, then went to the house to wash up. By the time he walked in, I had two sandwiches made and the ice tea poured. I heard his boots on the wooden floor as I sat at the island withmyhead down.
Ignoring me and his food, he went to the sink and washed before he joined me. Sitting on the stool across from me, he bit into his sandwich. His sound of approval gave me a satisfied smile as he tilted his head back and drank the iced tea in one long gulp. The movement of his Adam’s apple as it bobbed up and down was hypnotizing, and I found myself lickingmylips as I fantasized about runningmytongue alonghis throat.
Just like almost every other meal, we ate in complete silence. I waited until he was about to stand up before I spoke. “I fixed the gate to the pasture.”
“Do youwant a medal?”
“I just wanted to let you know,” I said dejectedly. “Is there anything youwant me to do this afternoon?”
He seemed to consider my question as he stood and put his dish in the sink. “The gardenneeds water, and pick anythingthat looks ripe.”
I nodded, but he was already walking out, clouds of dust following him. Sighing, I cleared my dishes and rinsed them before going back into the summer heat. I walked through the garden with a basket, gathering everything that looked edible, before watering it. When I was done, I nailed the loose planks Keno had kicked out in his stall, replaced a pane ofglass inthe door to the storage shed, and thenmowed the backyard.
The sun was just about behind the horizon, and I expected any minute to see Chase walk out from the house dressed in his Sunday best to visit Owen, though I wasn’t completely surprised when I didn’t see him leave. He rarelylet me know whenor where he was going.
It wasn’t until I whistled for the horses and saw Admiral galloping through the field with the rest of the herd that I realized Chase hadn’t left yet. One by one, I led the horses inside, leaving Admiral for last. He pawed at the ground and whinnied when he heard his friends eating dinner in their stalls. Following Chase’s strict instructions, I never touched Admiral.
Placing my hip and shoulder against the doorway of the barn, I crossed my ankles and watched Admiral pace back and forth in front of the repaired gate. Debating on whether or not to bring him inside, I thought back to the night before, to the sorrow I’d seen in Chase’s eyes. Pure pain had darkened his blue eyes to midnight black, and while it was obvious he suffered daily from the loss of his husband, I yearned for someone to feelthat kind ofall-encompassinglove for me.
Chewingonthe end ofa piece ofhay, myeyes were drawnfromthe frustrated black beast to the setting sun decorating the sky with breathtaking pinks and oranges until it lowered and the day finally gave way to dusk. Admiral snorted, bringing my attention back to him. He shook his head and twisted his lip up in a long whinny. There was still no sign of Chase. I couldn’t hear the tractor or him working in either of the barns. I was tempted to saddle up Lakota and ride out to the grave, thinkingmaybe Chase had walked there.
Almost an hour passed before I straightened and headed for the gate.
“Fuck it,” I said lowly. Anxiously, I held Admiral’s halter, and he waited patientlywhile I unlatched the gate. “C’mon, boy.”
Opening the gate, I stepped aside and let him walk through. He pranced eagerly as we headed for the barn, but he never acted up. At his stall, I released him as he entered, and he immediately went to his grain bucket. Closing his door, I slid the latch and then smiled to myself. There was probably going to be hell to pay for disobeying orders, but it would be worthit. Pickingmyshirt up offthe ground, I flungit over myshoulder, turned out the lights, and partially closed the doors before crossing the drivewayto the house.
I was shocked when I entered and smelled dinner cooking and heard the sound of movement in the kitchen. Making my way down the hall, I found Chase in the kitchen dressed in the black jeans and crisp white shirt he wore to visit Owen, making me wonder if he was going later. Standinginfront ofthe stove, he stirred somethingina fryingpan.
“Everythingdone?”he asked casually, his back to me.
“The horses are inside.” I paused, taking a breath for courage to prepare for certainwrath. “
All
ofthem.”
“Did he give you any trouble?” he asked without looking at me. I knew exactlywho he was referringto.
“Not at all,” I answered. There was a new energy in the air around us, one that held somethingI was unfamiliar withbut that excited me.
“Dinner willbe readyina few minutes, whydon’t youwashup.”
Following his orders, I went upstairs to the bathroom and washed the grime off my face and arms before finding a clean T-shirt to wear. I joined him a few minutes later, noticing the same country station that always played in the barn was on in the kitchen for the first time. I offered to help, but he shook his head. Sitting on the stool, I watched him cook and humalong with the music, and I swear he even swayed to the beat a few times. When the food finished cooking, he served me a plate of steaming chicken and pasta before opening the fridge and pulling out two beers. Surprisingly, he slid one across the island to me. He knew my age; he knew it wasn’t legal for me to drink. Eyeing him, I lifted the bottle to mylips and took a sip, enjoyingthe heartytaste. He didn’t look at me, but there was a slight smile on his face. It wasn’t until he sat down across fromme that I saw the difference inhim.
The darkness inhis eyes fromthe night before had lightened. He was far fromhappy, but bordered on content as he drank his beer and cut into his chicken. I assumed we would eat in silence like we always did; it was something I’d grown accustomed to and accepted. Then he did the unexpected.
He spoke.
“Mind ifI ask yousomething?”he asked around a mouthfuloffood.
“Sure.”
“Whyare youhere?”
“Mytruck broke down, and it was goingto—”
“That’s not what I mean,” he interrupted, raising his eyebrow. “I mean, whyare youreallyhere?”
Lowering my head, I mixed my food with my fork. It was a legitimate question, just not one I was sure I could answer. Keeping my eyes safelyonmyplate, I shrugged. “I don’t fit inanywhere.”
“What about your home?”
“That’s where I fit in the least.” I snorted. “My parents are all about making a lot of money and having the best of everything, but that’s not who I am.” Having not seen any evidence of them, I was tempted to ask about his family, but I was afraid his answer would be what I feared about myown—he’d beenshunned because he was gay.
“And college?”he asked before I could muster anycourage.
“School is all final club boys partying and college kids rallying for causes they don’t really believe in. Plus, I’mstudying something I couldn’t care less about. I’m only there because it was where my parents wanted me to go.”
“So leave,”he said casually.
As ifit was that easy.
“I am,”I replied calmly, decisively.
Pickingup his beer, he took a sip. “You’re droppingout?”
“For a while. At least untilI figure out what I want to do withmylife. Where I want to be,”I answered honestly.
It felt amazing to reveal my inner thoughts out loud. It made them seem more real and possible. Out there, in the middle of nowhere Nebraska, I was realizing just about anything was possible. It was where a city boy could learn to enjoy physical labor, ride a horse, harvest hay, and drive a tractor, evenwhere a boycould find his soulmate.
“Are yousure that’s the answer?”he challenged quietly.
“Honestly? No, but I know I don’t belong there. I—” I stopped, debatingoncontinuing.
“What?”he hedged.
Slowly lifting my eyes from my plate to him, I swallowed before saying, “I just feel so lost sometimes, but it’s different out here. No one’s judgingme, I canbe myself.”
“We all get lost sometimes,” he divulged softly. “That’s completely normal.”
“Have youever felt lost?”I asked him, not expectingananswer.
“Every damn day,” he confessed wistfully before dropping his gaze to his food.
My dinner forgotten at his words, I observed him, wondering what was churning behind the bluest eyes I’d ever seen. He shoveled some food into his mouth, chewing quickly before taking another forkful. I wanted so much to ask him about Owen, about their relationship, everythingfromhow theymet to how he died, but I remained mute.
When his plate was empty, he stood and brought it to the sink. Without turningto me, he spoke again.
“I don’t know much about the world, Elijah. I’ve hardly been outside Nebraska. I was born and raised right here on this land, but I know a man needs to find his own path, his own way in life. He can’t let anyone, evenfamily, dictate what he’s supposed to do.”
“How?”I wantedno,
needed
the answers.
He released a long breath and ran a hand through his hair. “By being true to himself, and who he is and what he reallywants.”
“Youmake it sound easy,”I said witha sigh.
Turning, he folded his arms across his chest. “It’s not. It takes time and you’re young, but listento your heart, Elijah. It won’t ever failyou.”
Our eyes met, and the intangible spark I always felt when he was near crackled and I shivered. I was certain he saw it, and without breakinghis stare, he walked purposefullyover to me. Stoppinginfront of me, he caught me in the indigo fire of his eyes, and I took the opportunity to inhale his tantalizing scent. Swallowing, I looked up at him, the way his lips parted as his tongue darted out to run along them, the way his eyes intensified witheachagonizingsecond that passed.
“Get some sleep,”he advised before turningonhis heel.
He left, striding down the hall and taking my breath with him as he entered his office and closed the door. As I washed the dishes, I knew I should have beenthankfulhe’d talked as muchas he had, but it onlymade me crave himmore, want to learn everything about him. The kitchen was clean, but I wasn’t ready to go up to bed. I went outside to the porch and leaned my hip and shoulder against the post at the top of the steps. Stuffing my hands in my pockets, I gazed up at the inky black sky dotted with bright stars. I had no clue what any of them were, I only saw the beauty in their twinkling. The night breeze washed over me, and I could hear bugs buzzing and the horses moving in the barn, communicating to eachother insoft nickers.
I thought about everything Chase had said, how honest and open he’d been for the first time since I’d arrived. He was right, I knew that, but it wasn’t that easy. His advice about living life wasn’t like when he’d given me instructions on how to drive the tractor or feed the horses, and I wasn’t sure I knew how to find my own path. Leaving school and not going home was a start, but was I living my life or just running away from it? Lost in my thoughts, I didn’t hear the screen door open and shut, but I heard his footsteps cross the porch and I felt him inches behind me. Not daringto look at him, I kept myface turned up to the sky.
“It’s beautiful,”I mumbled.
He moved closer, his heat radiating through our clothes to seep into my skin, sending a shiver of awareness through me. Gently pressing his chest to my back, his strong arms wrapped around my waist as his nose caressed my hair and he breathed me in. Gasping at his touch, I reacted instinctively to my thirst for him and angled my head to the side. Surprisingly soft lips kissed the sensitive skin behind my ear. I was afraid to move, afraid as soon as I did, the mirage of his body against mine would disappear and I would be left alone.
“You’re beautiful,”he whispered against me.
It was the lightest of touches, but I was already bursting with a hunger I’d never felt for anyone before. Long fingers moved across my abdomen until one slid under the hem of my T-shirt to graze along my skin. A vicious tremor went through me, and I leaned back into him, letting him support my weight in my weakening state. While he left openmouthkisses alongmyjaw, he slid his hands under myshirt and traced my newly defined muscles before taking the hemand expertly edging the shirt up my body to expose my flesh to the night air. My breath hitched in my throat.
“Lift,” he prompted when the shirt got stuck on my arms, dangling uselesslyat myside.
Hesitantly, and with a hammering heart, I raised them and he pulled the shirt over my head, letting it fall to the ground. Lacing his fingers with mine, he brought my hands back down to my sides. Dropping them, he splayed his on my chest, holding me to himwhile he ran the callused pad of a thumb over my already pebbled nipple, and my cock strained against my jeans. He continued to ravish me with his mouth, biting and nipping his way over the tender skin, always sure to soothe it afterward with his warm tongue. One hand remained on my chest, rubbing a pert bud and earning keening sounds from me while his other hand traveled down my body to the trail of hair just above the waistband of my jeans and stroked the skin there with his rough fingers. Laying my head on his shoulder, I relished the overwhelming sensations. He was only one man with two hands and a mouth, but it seemed he was everywhere at once. Movinghis hand lower, he palmed myerection, and myhips bucked forward, seeking more ofwhat they’d never had.
“Please,”I begged, not capable ofsayinganythingmore.
He responded with a thrust of his own, and his lips found my ear, nibbling on the lobe. Returning both hands to my waist, he lifted his head and put some space between us. Just when I thought it was over, that he would turn and run like he always did, he spun me in his embrace. With widened eyes, I watched as he took my arms and wound themaround his shoulders. I buried my fingers in his hair. For the first time in my life, I felt another man’s erection against my own. I searched his eyes that so often carefully veiled his emotions and thoughts, only to find themas fullofneed and want as myown. Whenhis hands danced up myback, I shivered and his lips turned up in a crooked, dazzling smile. He had to know the effect he had onme.