Breach (21 page)

I nodded at his words
, and willed my muscles to uncoil, my body relaxing back into him. He was playing my body in a way only he could. No other man would ever be able to make me feel that way.

H
is fingers slipped into me, while his other hand moved across my chest to tease my nipple. “Come back to me, baby. Don’t let them take you from me.”

N
athan would not be ignored, least of all because of my past. I loved him for doing that for me. No therapy could ever get me out of my head like that…but Nathan could. He knew what I needed, since his head was equally as fucked up and rife with past trauma.

My legs shook
as his fingers pushed deeper, my whole body tensing as I moved closer and closer to the edge. He was pulling me into that trance-like state I craved and needed.

I moaned and pushed my hips back i
nto his as I fisted his hair. “You are
my
cock slut,
my
sex goddess, and
my
beautiful girl. That’s all you need to know.”

I was panting, so close to release. Every time he called me his
, I almost came and sobbed at the same time. I was undone. I couldn’t think at all about anything but his possession. My walls clenched around his fingers, my muscles seizing in ecstasy as he pushed me over the edge.

My body was limp against his, my arms at my side
s. The spray of the water was cooling my now heated skin.

His hands ran soothing circles on my skin.
“Feel better? Are you okay now?”

I nodded as best I could, unable to talk. I soaked up the feeling of him pressed against my
back, and tried my hardest to push back the dark doubts that were writhing at the back of my mind.

CHAPTER
16

I
t was a long emotional weekend with Nathan, and I was happy to have my weekly schedule of work ahead of me to focus on. Work helped to take my brain off my Nathan-obsession for a little while. At least until I was sucking on a pen. That move had gotten me into quite a bit of trouble on more than one occasion. It wasn’t entirely intended, but just as he clicked on pens to think, I sucked on them.

Nathan worked
very
hard that weekend to make sure I couldn’t remember my name let alone walk by the time he was done. He had returned me to normal, my nightmare pushed to the back of my mind, and by Sunday night I was back in control of myself. I hated showing how weak I was to anyone, let alone him. That was why I created an alternate version of myself. I yearned to one day be as strong as the woman I made people believe I was on the outside.

I
also learned I had given Nathan great power over me. He had the ability to heal me or destroy me, and I didn’t know which way it would go. A thought that scared me, but I pushed it back with all the other bad thoughts.

It was a little
before seven in the morning when the elevator landed on the first floor, and I stepped into the parking lot, heading to work. After rounding the corner, I stopped in my tracks when I noticed a very familiar man leaning on my car.

I took a deep breath
as I walked toward him, unsure why he was waiting for me. I was still pissed about Friday night somewhere in my head, but I felt like Nathan had fucked that loose as well.

Andrew greeted
me when I was within earshot. “Hi.”

I crossed my arms over my chest. “Hi.
”

“I came by to apologize
.” He shoved his hands into his pockets, and I knew he meant it. He always did that when he felt bad about something.

“You did, did you?” I
wasn’t planning on letting him off the hook, yet. His words hurt, and I wanted to know what sparked them.

“Yes. I thought about the other night and realized what
the problem was.”

“And?”

He rubbed the back of his neck and let out a nervous little laugh. “I’m jealous. I’m a jealous asshole.”

My mouth dropped open, and my breath escaped in a hiss.
His confession took me completely off guard and my eyebrows scrunched together. “
What
?”

“My behavior was horrible
. I guess I was in shock and, to be honest, a little turned on by the thought of sex with you in a public place. I mean, if you wanted sex, why didn’t you come to me? We were always very good in that department. It wasn’t just that, though.”

“What was it then?”

He gave me a pained smile and sighed. “I can see you’ve changed since I last saw you. It’s not much yet, but there’s a light every now and again in your eyes and it wasn’t me who put it there. I faced that hard truth the other night. It wasn’t your issues that broke us apart, it was me. It was
me
that didn’t understand, and I was frustrated with myself for failing. I am never going to be what you need. I am never going to heal you. He understands you, doesn’t he?”

I nodded, too stunned by his admission to speak.

“Did I help? At least a little?” His eyes were dim with a sadness I’d never seen in him.

I placed my hand on his chest. “You helped
me more than you’ll ever know.”

He pursed his lips and nodded.
“But it wasn’t enough.”

I gave him a small, sad smile.

“I’m sorry, really sorry about the other night. Please don’t hold it against me,” he begged.

I gave him a stern look before smiling and pulling him in for a hug. “Just don’t hurt me like that again, ok
ay?”

“I’m so
sorry. You know I was worried and flew off the handle. I mean, I know you’re a horny girl, but rather than some random guy, just jump my bones next time, okay?”

I laughed and pulled back, swatting his chest.
“He wasn’t random.”

“Ok
ay, just jump me next time,” he said with a bright smile.

“You’re going to get me in trouble.”

“Why? Is he the possessive type?”

I lau
ghed at his accuracy but stopped when I felt his body stiffen. His face was no longer lighthearted, but hard.

“Andrew
?”

My gaz
e followed his. Nathan had just stepped through the exit and he was glaring at us. My eyes locked with his, and a shiver ran down my spine at the icy look he gave me.

He was angry.
Very angry.

“A little early to be flirting, isn’t it? Get going, Delilah, we have a meeting this morning, remember?” He called as I watched him walk into the parking lo
t, his eyes still locked on us.

“I was just leaving, thank you for the reminder, Nathan,”
I replied.

He got into
his car a few spots down and pulled out, gunning it out of the parking lot.

Andrew spoke up, startling me.
“I don’t like him.”

I turned back to him, noticing
my hand was still resting on his chest, and that I was leaning into him.

Shit. I was in deep trouble. I had just inadvertently set Nathan
off, and I would be punished all day long by the anger that was rolling off him. He didn’t like Andrew, and standing like that with him, laughing? What the hell was I thinking?

“
Why
don’t you like him?” I was getting tired of their pissing contest. Though it did make me feel good knowing that two good looking men were on the verge of fighting over me. “You don’t even know him.”

“Do you?”

“A little,” I lied. “We’ve worked together for a few months now.”

“He has a reputation with women
, and I don’t want that to include you.”

I quirked my eyebrow at him.
“Is that really it? Because I can assure you he doesn’t see me that way.”

No, I’m different from them.

Andrew sighed and looked down at me. “I’ve also heard some things about him. He has anger management issues. He was thrown out of the courtroom more than once for his outbursts. That’s why he isn’t in the courtroom anymore.”

I sighed in relief. A
ndrew only seemed to know water-cooler talk, nothing more. I wasn’t sure if I was happy about that or sad. I wanted to know more about Nathan, but I wanted it to come
from
Nathan.

“Well, it’s getting late, we need to head in,” I said, dropping the Nathan
subject.

“Sounds good.
I’ll see you in the office.” He leaned down and hugged me. He placed a kiss on my forehead then walked to his car.

I opened the door to my own car and slid insid
e. We weren’t really running late, I was always early, but I didn’t want to argue with Andrew because I knew it would end with me giving myself away. I knew about Nathan’s anger, I bore witness to it almost daily, but I had never felt threatened by it. It was all self-destructive in nature.

I looked down at my watch:
quarter after seven. My hand turned the key, starting the car and heading to meet my fate; my angry war god of sex and whatever punishment he decided to deliver upon me. My body was already heating up at the thought. It was going to be a very long, very frustrating day and I had Andrew to both blame and thank for it.

I
knew I was in deep trouble as soon as I pulled into the parking lot at work. Nathan was standing there, leaning against his car.

Waiting.

How odd they were, the feelings I held. They were so different from what I had known. His anger didn’t scare me, it electrified me. It stemmed from his desire for me, and I was vibrating in anticipation.

W
hen he punished me, I could feel my whole being open up to him. He filled me with an emotion I couldn’t describe, but I knew I wanted more of it. I craved it.

The car slid into the parking spot next to his, and he started
walking toward the building. I grabbed my purse and bag and headed in after him.

It wasn’t quite seven thirty;
most of our coworkers didn’t start until eight or nine, so the building wasn’t that busy with people yet. There was a sprinkling of people in the lobby; many of them were headed to the coffee shop before heading up to their respective floors.

He was standing at the elevator bay
when I caught up. Alone.

As I approached I could feel the
mounting tension rolling off him.

“Thorne
.” I stepped up to wait beside him, facing front.

“
Palmer.” His voice was even, covering what was just below the surface.

In my peripheral
, I could see him looking at me. His expression was impassive, but his body said something completely different.

The elevator car arrived and we stepped on.

Alone. Damn. We were alone, the space stifling, making it hard to breathe. I wanted him already. Then again, I always wanted him.

The second
the doors closed he was on me, pinning me to the wall. Hidden from the camera, his lips crushed mine. Hard, controlling, punishing. The way I loved him; the war god of sex. I moaned into his mouth, and I felt his hips flex, pushing his cock into my stomach.

“What the fuck was that?” he asked
, pulling away.

I blink
ed up at him. “What? Andrew came by to apologize for Friday night.”

Nathan growled and reached over to press the stop button an
d the elevator halted in place. “I can’t believe he was fucking touching you and you were letting him. You’re mine, remember?” He growled, his fingers pushing my skirt up, making their way up inside my thigh, brushing over my panties, and pressing against the thin fabric.

H
is other hand ripped the flimsy strip of cotton at the side seam before pushing two fingers all the way in my pussy. My body arched toward his, my hands fisting the fabric on his suit. “I’ll make sure you don’t fucking forget. Don’t
ever
touch another man again, do you understand me?”