Boston Boys [01] - A Life Without You (12 page)

He moans softly against my lips when I touch the rim, so I massage it with my wet finger. I drive my tongue into Jesse’s mouth and push just a little bit against the rim. Jesse moans deeply into my mouth and tightens his hold on me while nudging his ass back into the touch. Encouraged, I push my finger a little farther with a groan.

Jesse moans against my ear and pushes his body closer to mine. I edge my finger deeper, little by little. Jesse’s cock is hard against my stomach, and my own is throbbing so badly that I think I might come any second now. He frees my dick from my pants, but abandons it when I use my other hand to lift his other thigh to my hip.

I hold him up by pressing him against the wall. My finger A Life Without You
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is in all the way now, surrounded by hot moisture. I breathe hard against his neck as his moans increase and turn into hoarse growls. His eyes close and he throws his head back, exposing his bare neck for me. I graze my teeth against his tanned skin while I fondle his prostate with my finger.

A high cry rips from Jesse’s throat. I press against the spot inside of him that makes him cry the highest. His body is ridged, his fingers are digging into my shoulder blades.

“Adam,” he gasps.

I can hardly feel my own body. I’m lost in Jesse’s ecstasy. But I am well aware of my own cock so stiff that it would only take the slightest touch to make it erupt. Jesse moaning, groaning, and panting against me has my mind spinning so fast that I can barely stand.

I move my head downwards and press my tongue against his hard nipple.

“Oh God, Adam,” he moans loudly. “Fuck, that feels good.” I’m no longer just rubbing against his spot. I’m finger-fucking him, moving it in and out, pressing against his point of pleasure each time. I want to pull my finger out and replace it with my cock, but I know it would hurt Jesse and that would ruin this blissful magic. But by God, I want to fuck the man in my arms.

I half-suppress a primal growl from somewhere deep inside of me and press my face against Jesse’s neck. The hot sensation around my finger, the soft spot it presses against, Jesse’s body in my arms, Jesse’s screams, Jesse’s high. It’s all too much. My climax hits me so hard that I’m having a hard time standing on my feet.

“Adam – Aaaah,” Jesse’s voice is a little hoarse when he cries just as the muscles around my finger retract. His body jerks as it squirts pearly semen up to my jaw, and then it goes limp in my arms.

He pants against my neck while I clutch him to me. My body’s so weak, and I’m shivering so badly that I have to slide him from my arms. But I don’t let him go.

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“Mmmh, Adam,” Jesse murmurs against my shoulder.

The sound of my name is so passionate, so intense that it is sweet music to my ears. The way he whispers my name sounds better than any love confession ever could.

“Come on, hotness, why don’t we go out tonight and get something decent to eat? Benji and Rick invited the whole gang over to a little pre-Christmas snack before the big feast tomorrow.

We’ll bake cookies, listen to Christmas songs, and help decorating.

It’s an annual event at their place,” Eric leans forward on the frayed couch opposite mine and gives me a whole five seconds before he sighs dramatically and goes at me again. “Come oooon, it’s Christmas Eve. Where’s your holiday spirit, Mr. Grinch?” My heels kick against the sofa where they dangle over the arm. There’s a split in the ceiling that reaches from the chandelier to the far corner of the living room. A cheesy Christmas movie plays on the TV, but I don’t care to watch it. A copy of Publishers Weekly lies tented on my stomach – I can’t even remember what the article was about.

“Told you like five times already to go without me,” I mutter.

“Come on, Adam. Stop brooding. Or at least if you’re gonna continue, don’t sit so close to that cactus. You’re bumming the both of us out. See? Its tiny little cock has gone limp.” The magazine slides to the floor as I turn my head to see the sorry-looking cactus behind the couch. What Eric is referring to as its penis hangs limp on the ‘body’ like it always has.

Poor Eric. There are a few people still on campus, but he and I are the only ones in this dorm. I know I’m brooding, but I don’t feel like doing anything else. There’re still three weeks until Jesse gets back.

“Who was that you were talking to on the phone earlier?” Eric asks.

“Jesse.” He’s called me three times in one week. That’s more often than he cares to hear from Chirpy over the same period of time. Chirpy has answered Jesse’s phone twice when I’ve called him and we ended up snapping at each other like two hissing cats.

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I know I’ve given her every reason not to like me – more than she knows – but I have no idea if Jesse knows about our animosity.

What are they doing right now? Swapping amusing stories by a fire with their families? Drinking eggnog, roasting chestnuts, or whatever the hell loving families do on Christmas Eve? Is he sitting squished against her with an arm around her shoulders, or has he planted himself into a single seat, wishing he was curled up in my arms?

Eric is chattering non-stop in the background. It takes me a minute to realize that he’s talking to me and not to his best friend Benji over the phone.

“…had a friend like that. In high school. Speaking of, wasn’t high school difficult for you since you were never in the closet?”

“Wasn’t high school difficult for everyone?” I say, my voice sounding horribly monotone.

“Yeah, you got me there. Well,” – I hear him smack his hand against the rhinestones on his pants – “if we’re not eating out, we’re eating in. But you know, unrequited love is a lonely dove, so just give it up, bro.” He dials a number and orders food.

It’s not unrequited. I was assured of that in the shower where we stood embracing under the hot water, our mouths locked in a kiss. Jesse’s hand found my cock and he began working it, but I told him I had already come. The look of surprise on his face, the look of delight in his eyes…

“So it
is
possible to come without anyone touching it,” he said against my mouth.

“Also while being penetrated,” I added before losing myself in his kiss again.

We stood like that for a long time, hands clutching, tongues lapping, hearts beating. He let me dry him off and take him to bed and fool around some more until we fell asleep and spent the night together, our limbs laced in a full body-hug. He didn’t speak of Chirpy the day after, but I could tell that he felt guilty again.

Someone’s calling my name.

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“I said food’s here, Adam.”

I open my eyes and see Eric pop his head into the living room.

My head is all groggy as I yawn. I must have fallen asleep.

“Before it’s cold,” Eric adds and I follow him to the Box.

The green and red rhinestones on Eric’s pants catch the light and send little dots of light on the yellow walls. He notices that I’m looking. “I did offer to buy you a matching pair, but you declined.”

I stifle a yawn. “I’m not gay like that.”

“There’s nothing wrong with flaunting it a smidge,” Eric says and dumps a number of boxes in front of me. Chinese takeout.

“At least we managed to get the Box cleaned up before the holidays. It’s nice to sit in a clean kitchen, isn’t it?” I grab a box and chopsticks. “How much do I owe you?”

“Don’t worry about it. I owe you from two weeks ago. Say, since you’re still suffering from an unhealthy Jesse-obsession, I’m sorry I outed you that time at the dorm party.” I stuff strings of noodles into my mouth with a shake of my head. “You didn’t.”

“He already knew?” Eric’s tone rises at the last syllable. He holds a chopstick in one hand and a box in the other, but doesn’t look like he’s about to eat.

I shrug and swallow the noodles. I grab a different box and fish out a piece of meat.

“Well how did he react?”

He literally crawled away from me, but then he got curious and we’ve
been having on-and-off sex since then.

I swallow down the meat.

“No differently. He’s fine with it.”

“Really? I thought he was the homophobic type.” Eric shakes off his surprise and starts to eat, eyebrows knitted in thought.

Bastard. Was he trying to get a reaction out of Jesse that night or was it just a thoughtless introduction that’s been eating at him
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ever since?

“What do you mean?” I ask. It’s my turn to put a pause on my chowing.

Eric stuffs his mouth. “Hm?”

“Why would you think he’s homophobic?” Eric shrugs. “It’s nothing.”

“Tell me,” I say, my voice sounding firmer than I meant it to.

“After dinner, caveman,” says Eric. “I don’t want my food getting cold. It’s kind of a long story.” I quickly close all the boxes to keep the heat inside.

“Ugh, fine,” Eric yields with a dramatic eye-roll. “Well, you know how he stayed at the frat house as an initiate for the first two weeks?”

“Uh, no he didn’t. He had a roommate who kicked him out because he sleeps naked.”

“Jesse sleeps naked?” Eric asks, a naughty smile forming on his lips.

“Focus.”

“Right, well, if he told you that, he lied. I was an initiate as well –”

“You? Okay, now I know you’re making this up.”

“Hello. Food getting cold! If you wanna hear this, hotness, then listen because I’m gonna talk very fast.” I shut my mouth and fold my hands over my chest.

“My dad was a member and he insisted that I apply for membership. I just thought, hey cute guys, so why not? Anyway, we slept in their living room and had to go through three levels of humiliation before being accepted.

“Jesse didn’t have it so bad, you know, because he has the ideal look and body for any fraternity. I think they’d already decided to accept him and a few others as well on the very first day. But there were also guys there the frats kept purely for their A Life Without You
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entertainment. Like Zeke the Geek.”

“Tomato-juice guy,” I say with revelation.

“Yup, so you’ve seen that he’s the complete stereotype: computer geek, short, gangly limbs, pimply face and mousey hair that could seriously use a good conditioner. The whole package and a perfect target for a bunch of bullies to pick on. It was so obvious that he’d never get in. I once asked him why he bothered after a whole day of him being leashed to a pole in the living room, having to eat anything the frats could think of stuffing into his mouth – and no, I’m not talking cocks. They made him eat the most ridiculous things that I’m just not gonna go into right now – ew. They sort of rounded up on him, laughed at him, and shouted dumb things at him. You know, what bullies do. One day ended with one of the frats pulling out his penis and peeing on the tiles by Zeke’s feet. Poor guy got pee-splatters all over his hands and feet.”

“Sheesh,” I say with a grimace.

“I know. Anyway, Zeke shrugged it off and said that it was the price he had to pay to get in. They’d performed some pell-mell speech on our first day. Something about honoring traditions to test our endurance and our loyalty to the frat house, bullshit like that.”

“What did you and Jesse have to do?”

“I had to clean the kitchen once and provide snacks on trays while Jesse just had to follow the frats around while they told him about the frat parties and such. As I said, he was already in so they didn’t put him through those humiliations. I was probably on their maybe-list simply because my dad used to be a member.

“Anyway, at the beginning of level two, every frat applicant was herded into the party room. They’d set it up with six chairs on either side, facing each other, and then five chairs in a half circle in between. Everyone on the twelve chairs had a good view of the five chairs. There were TV screens everywhere. The guys who were ‘definitely’ and ‘maybes’ were seated on the twelve

‘audience chairs’, while the obvious ‘no’s’ were sat on the five
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chairs.

“I didn’t see Zeke anywhere until the gay porn was playing on every screen and he was pushed through the door, stark naked.

He did this awkward dance and some of the guys watching laughed.”

I swallow repeatedly. I don’t like where this is going.

“Jesse was sitting opposite me and had this look of disbelief on his face as he watched. He didn’t seem to know whether to watch awkward Zeke or the hardcore ass-thumping on the screen. Both obviously made him uncomfortable.

“Then a voice through the speakers said that because the five in the half circle hadn’t proved their devotion enough, they had to pull down their pants. They all did and then the voice told Zeke to go ahead.

“He had this smiling-frown on his face, but I could see tears forming in his eyes as he bent down in front of the first of the five and put his limp dick in his mouth.”

“What?” My throat tightens with a sickening pressure in my stomach.

“I know, it was almost enough to de-homofy me.”

“Isn’t he underage?” The skin on my body threatens to crawl right off when I picture that poor kid being forced to suck a cock. My limbs are already beginning to feel a little numb.

“No, he’s eighteen, he just looks fourteen. But anyway, as the guy’s dick hardened he was ordered to watch the ass-fucking on the screen while being sucked off by Zeke.

“Jesse sat through about half of that first one, but when Zeke was choking while being ordered to swallow all of the guy’s cock, Jesse stood up and left. He was probably just as disgusted as I was, but I always had an inkling that he was homophobic since he couldn’t even look at the screens. He just kept rubbing his sweaty palms on his thighs and he was sort of rocking in his chair a smidge like he was deciding whether or not to make a run for it.”

“Well, what did you do?” I take a drink of soda to wet my dry A Life Without You
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mouth once I get a little bit of feeling back in my fingers.

“I left, too, along with two of the five ‘no’s.”

“So, Jesse wasn’t accepted.”