Bitter Winds (4 page)

She returned to swirling her fingers in the soft dirt. They sat in the quiet, watching Jojo ride around until his face was barely distinguishable under the dim streetlights.

“Watching the evening unfold from here is so different than anywhere else I’ve ever watched it,” Li Jin said.

“How so?”

She looked out toward the street at the few people left walking by. It was obvious which people were strolling as an evening ritual, and which were on their way to somewhere important. It was all in the abundance or lack of determination in their pace.

“Before, in different places I’ve been, I have always wondered what it would feel like to be part of a family. I spent a lot of time alone—then when Jojo came, it was just the two of us. Now, I know when I go in for the evening, I’ll be surrounded by people who care about me. It’s not just us against the world anymore. It’s strange.”

She suddenly wished she hadn’t shared so much again. He’d always had a family. He’d never understand the complete feeling of isolation she’d lived with for so long. She saw Jojo’s bike veer wildly when he swatted at the mosquitos around him. If she got him through the day without blood or tears, it’d be a miracle. She stood and stretched, realizing how tired she was.

Sky took her cue and stood, too. “Well, the bugs are getting bad out here, aren’t they? I’d better go. Do you want me to help you get Jojo’s bike in? I brought a chain and lock for it.”

“No, we can manage.” Li Jin stepped forward a few steps. “Jojo! Time to put it up. You need a bath for school tomorrow.”

Jojo mumbled his reluctance under his breath but began to bring the bike in.

“Well, I’ll see you tomorrow then,” Sky said.

“Tomorrow?”

“Yes, aren’t you all painting the animals on the walls in the playroom?” he asked.

Li Jin nodded. Linnea had offered to come and draw animals, and Li Jin and the other girls were going to help her fill them in with color. So far they had a small handful of children and wanted their gathering room to be stimulating and fun, anything to cover the drab walls.

“Yeah, but I didn’t know you were coming.”

Sky laughed. “Linnea already roped me into it. She said my sense of color was needed, but I think she just needed more muscle. I’m bringing the paint, and wait until you see what I’ve got planned.”

Li Jin smiled. She knew now that she need not worry about how it would turn out. With Sky’s unique sense of style, the room would probably be the most colorful in the house.

Jojo pulled up and hopped off the bike.

“Night, Jojo.” Sky held his hand in the air and waited for his high five.

“Night.” Jojo slapped his palm, then took off into the house, sending a small cloud of dust up at Li Jin as she stood holding the bike upright.

She shook her head. “Off to the next thing, I’m sure.” She looked at the door he’d disappeared through and saw Sami staring at them before she moved out of view.

Sky took the bike from her and guided it into the small shed at the back of the lot. He pulled the lock from his pocket and attached it, then handed Li Jin the key. In the dirt at their feet a few pesky dandelions competed for space. Sky bent down and picked one up, then stood and pushed it through the hair over Li Jin’s ear.

“Tomorrow then.”

She smiled and looked away quickly. “Tomorrow.”

B
enfu struggled to carry a load of diapers as he followed Li Jin into the storeroom. Jasmine trailed behind them, silently moving her lips to a song only she could hear. He dropped his boxes on the stack of others, then pulled his hankie from his pocket and wiped the sweat from his brow.

Li Jin had already stacked her load and stood waiting for him. His grandson’s birthday a week before made Benfu wish he were at least a decade younger. He hated the way his body refused to cooperate with the pace of his mind.

To add to his worry, he’d awoken from a dream of ants crawling up his bedpost. Though he tried not to allow old superstitions to dictate his thoughts, he couldn’t help but hope the symbolism the ants brought of impending bad news was wrong. Things were going well in his life and he wanted it to stay that way.

“We’ve got enough diapers to last until the end of the month,” he said, counting the boxes once again. “That was a nice gesture those foreign ladies made. Their donated milk powder should last awhile.”

“
Dui,
unless we get more babies,” Li Jin answered, a twinkle in her eyes. “Have you seen our latest dark-eyed beauty? She’s a keeper.”

Benfu knew the one she spoke of—an infant brought to them after being found in a box outside the hospital. Poppy was no longer their youngest, but now a big sister. In their home, all incoming children were considered part of the family. The new child—Coral, they’d decided on—had a cleft lip, but even so, her complexion and beautiful eyes more than made up for that slight imperfection. He didn’t know how just yet, but they’d find a way to fund her operation when she met the minimum age and weight requirement. For now Coral was being cared for by Auntie Rae, an elderly woman who’d found her way to the center after being on the streets for the last several years. After only a few weeks with shelter, regular meals, and a purpose in life, the woman already looked years younger and was proud of her position as an
ayi
to Coral. Benfu knew soon they’d probably give the woman another child or two to be in charge of. If his daughter would let them loose from her own care, that was.

It was obvious that Li Jin had a soft spot for all babies, but especially those abandoned. She wouldn’t be able to turn any away. He’d try to counsel his daughter about taking on too much but what room did he have to talk? He’d taken in dozens of baby girls over the years. He couldn’t turn any away, either!

“That reminds me, how’s Sami doing?” he said as he began arranging the boxes in a neat stack.

Li Jin sighed. “Other than her feeling under the weather every day, I guess she’s okay. I just wish I knew what keeps triggering her dark moods. She’s told me a lot about her past but I think there’s something more—something she can’t speak of.”

Benfu patted the top of a box and he sat on one next to it. “Have a seat, Daughter.”

Li Jin sat down. Benfu took a deep breath.

“Jasmine, run on into the kitchen and see if your Nai Nai is ready for your lessons.”

The little girl smiled at him, then turned and scampered out of the room and down the hall. Benfu shook his head. She was still his little shadow and had yet to say one word since the day she’d joined their family. He sighed. Maybe one day. He gave his attention back to his eldest daughter.

“Your mother and I have been talking. Now don’t go getting all riled up, but we think maybe Sami needs to see a doctor.”

He watched as Li Jin wrinkled her forehead, a look he’d come to know that she used only when deeply confused.

“She’s seen a doctor several times now. You both know that.”

“Not that kind of doctor, Li Jin, though I’m glad you finally talked her into seeing to the health of the baby. We mean someone she can talk to about her problems. I don’t think you see what we do, and I’m afraid the girl might be in more serious trouble than you know.”

Li Jin shook her head. “Baba, Sami’s been through a lot and I think that if everything goes well with the birth, she’ll be much better. A child will give her a purpose in the world, rather than just floating from place to place as she’s always done. Just give her some time. Please.”

Benfu watched his daughter closely. If she really believed a child would cure the girl of her constant melancholy, then she was hiding her head in the sand. And it was more than sadness he saw in Sami—it was something darker.

Li Jin continued. “And anyway, I think she and Sky would make a great couple. He’d be good for her. I’m working on that, too.”

“She doesn’t think I’ve noticed, Li Jin, but she’s been sneaking out after we’ve gone to bed. She doesn’t come back until just before daybreak sometimes.” He avoided telling his daughter that he’d walked in on Sami cornering an uncomfortable Sky in the storage room the week before. The poor boy had looked relieved to see Benfu and had fled as if the emperor’s ghostly army were after him.

“I know. I woke up one morning when she was climbing back into bed and she said she just likes to sit outside in the quiet. She’s fine, Baba.”

“And she does an awful lot of sleeping during the day, Li Jin. I don’t think she’s too fond of anyone here, except you.”

“She’s just shy. But you’re right that she is really loyal to me.” Li Jin moved away, fidgeting and turning her head.

Benfu wanted to say more.
Aiya,
he
needed
to say more. But it was such a touchy subject with Li Jin. She was overly protective of the girl and in her eyes, Sami was just temporarily troubled. But Benfu suspected her problems went much deeper than Li Jin knew, and from what he knew of Sky, even that young man wouldn’t be able to break through Sami’s icy wall.

“We should have a few more rooms available by the end of the month, too. Maybe we can move Sami out of your room, to give you both some privacy.”

He was hopeful that they’d soon be done with all the construction. Already they’d filled six of the extra rooms and were busy converting one of the attached warehouse areas into smaller living accommodations. The walls were up and he’d arranged for a group of unemployed laborers to finish working on the plaster. They wouldn’t be paid much, but in these times, a little would go a long way, and they were eager to get the job. Overall, the place was coming along fine. Even their first priority—a small private bathroom with a shower and bench for Maggi—had turned out much nicer than they’d thought possible with their tiny budget. Yes, their new house was fast becoming a home. And they even had another empty building once used for storage that they could expand into later, if needed. He still couldn’t believe the terrible shape the property had been in when they’d first seen it, but luckily his daughter had seen the potential. It had been priced at just enough to cover the overdue government taxes, and he felt they’d gotten a steal.

Sometimes Benfu missed their little house where they had lived for so many years, but then he realized it wasn’t the place that made the memories—it was the people. And anyway, his father was tickled to death to have moved into their old house and it was a perfect fit for the old man. Calli was glad to have someone in it who would take great care of the garden and flowers she’d left behind, and his father had even made a lot of new friends in the
hutong
.

“Your idea to have one adult to live with and oversee three children per room was perfect. And now that we’re holding competitions for the cleanest kept rooms and children, everyone is working hard and things are falling into place,” Li Jin said.

Benfu nodded. It was an easy plan. People wanted to have a home—that much was simple. Putting good, honest men or women in charge of rooms and giving them the responsibility of a few children in their care only brought out the best in people. And the ones who’d come forward so far were just regular citizens down on their luck. A few of the older women were simply forgotten mothers of grown children, left to fend for themselves
without the security of a husband or family. It was a second chance for them and feeling needed was helping them improve their outlook on life again. The old women—and even some men—were seen smiling ear to ear, or laughing as they pushed their charges around the center to eat, play, or finish chores. The transformations of their personalities once they felt needed were amazing.

Li Jin sighed. “I wish the rooms could be bigger, but I understand. It’s just that there isn’t much space to accommodate people’s belongings.”

She was right, Benfu thought. Each room was outfitted with two sets of bunk beds and a small table and chairs. They had splurged on small propane heaters for each room, too. But that was enough and probably more than most of their residents were accustomed to. And material things were overrated—even Lao Tzu taught “to have little is to possess and to have plenty is to be perplexed
.
” In all Benfu’s years, he’d also known this to be true. In his life, he’d been blessed to have shelter, food, warmth, and most of all, family. That was all he needed and he’d tried to give the same to others out there walking the world alone. When Li Jin had approached him with the idea, her selflessness had made him proud. In their room that night as they’d marveled over it, Calli had only nodded and told him of course his own daughter would’ve inherited his altruistic tendencies.

So far their shelter hadn’t been approved as a welfare institution, meaning Benfu couldn’t get the financial help he really needed, but they were making it work with donations—and a bit of bargaining and bartering. Li Jin had mostly used her own money to buy the property, but from what he could gather, her funds were also running low. He wasn’t even sure why her ex-boyfriend had given her the large amount of cash, as she’d said, but that wasn’t his business. He was just glad the purchase meant she’d probably be in his life permanently.

“Did you hear that our latest teen boy, Jace, is painting the inside of a store downtown and they’re going to pay him with some secondhand high chairs?” Li Jin smiled triumphantly.

Benfu was taken aback. Jace’s disability usually resulted in others not giving him a chance in the outside world. That was how he’d come to them—tired and defeated from life on the streets, being ostracized because of his deformity. It hadn’t taken long for word to spread about their shelter, sending the boy their way. And despite only having one arm, he could paint! He was a really nice kid and the best painter they had. Benfu was proud that Jace had taken it a step further and gone out to see what he could do to help his new family. He was proving his loyalty, and a few high chairs would come in handy, to be sure.

He held his hand in the air and Li Jin slapped it. “See! That’s what I’m talking about! We all use our strengths and connections and we can make this place run like a finely tuned machine.”

More than anything Benfu was full of pride. Rose Haven was even more special because he and Calli were creating it with their daughter. It was Li Jin’s dream they were helping her fulfill. The project had given him a burst of energy he hadn’t had in a long time, and it was amazing how coming together to make decisions, organize rooms, and run the place had done wonders to mend the frac
tured r
elationship with their daughter. Slowly Li Jin was beginning to trust again, and Benfu hoped with all his heart that one day she’d forgive all the transgressions that had been done to her. He didn’t have much time left on this earth—he was an old man—but he planned to spend it helping this daughter and the others get on track for their futures. He knew he needed to slow down. His aching legs told him so each morning as he traveled his usual route to look for abandoned or lost children on his side of town. The gods had been good lately—no recent discoveries of little ones left behind.