Beginnings (10 page)

“Well, that didn't work. Do you think the nurses have a pamphlet on how to reconnect with your comatose body?” Even though he was trying to make light of the situation I could tell he was growing impatient.

“Adam, this will work. We just have to think.” I looked down at his body. It was so weird seeing him there, knowing I could finally reach out and touch him. Then it hit me. A wave of emotions ran through me. I felt myself growing nervous with what I was about to do. I went to reach for his hand, then stopped myself. I was about to touch Adam for the first time and the thought both exhilarated me and terrified me. I took a shaky breath and gripped his hand. It was colder than I expected. I felt tears form in my eyes.

“Adam,” I barely whispered. He looked at me. Then followed my eyes to where my hand was. “Feel me. Feel my hand touching yours.” Tears were falling fast down my cheeks. I was overcome with emotions. “Feel me, Adam. I'm right here touching you. This is what we've always wanted.” I locked eyes with his, “Feel my touch.” He closed his eyes for a long time, taking deep breaths. Then he opened them. He lifted up the hand that I was holding while a smile started to form on his face, and then he was gone.

Chapter 11

His monitors started coming alive with action. I noticed his eyes start to flutter and his hand started to grip mine.

“Adam.” The tears just kept coming. He opened his eyes and just stared at me. I reached over and stroked his hair.
My Adam
. To describe the moment is impossible. I felt such joy and excitement. He was here, flesh and blood.
My Adam, alive and holding my hand.

“What are you doing here?”

The nurse's voice startled me. I jumped back as she stormed towards me.

“I, um...” I couldn't think of what to say.

More nurses starting coming and I got pushed aside. I stood there, frozen.

One of them turned to me, “You need to get out of the way.”

I nodded, then made my way to the hallway in a daze. I watched as they pushed his bed out the door and down the hallway.

The next few hours were torture as I tried to find out were he went and how he was doing. Eventually he was brought back to his room and then a crowd of people started showing up. I recognized his parents and siblings right away. The others I assumed were family as well. I felt a pang of jealousy; I was his family. Why had none of them come looking for me?
I'm sure Adam told them to find me.

His mother was weeping, holding his hand. They were talking but I couldn't hear what they were saying.

“Ma'am, can I help you?” The nurse's voice made me jump. Everyone in the room turned to look at us. Adam looked straight at me. I held my breath.

“Hey, mommy. I think that was the girl in my room.” His voice sounded different; younger, less mature, and he stuttered a bit. Then he turned to look at his mom, “Since everyone’s so happy with me can I get a new toy?”

I stumbled backwards. I hadn't thought of this. I turned around and blindly made my way to the elevator.
He doesn't remember me
. It had never once crossed my mind that he could forget. What's more is I didn't take into consideration that when he went into the coma he was eight years old, so of course when he woke up he would still believe he's eight. I felt so naïve and stupid. This wasn't how it was supposed to happen.

The elevator doors opened and I just stared at it. I was in too much shock to move.

“Um, miss? Are you coming?”

I couldn't answer. Eventually the doors closed and the elevator went down. 
Now what?
I couldn't just leave without talking to him.

A little spark ignited inside me. I just needed to see him face to face, to talk to him.
How can he not remember? It's us. His brain is just confused and trying to work everything out.

I felt myself calming down. I found a waiting room on another floor; I didn't want to take any chances of his family seeing me. I stayed there until well past visiting hours to make sure everyone was gone. When I got to his room I breathed a big sigh of relief. It was empty. I walked in and stood at the foot of his bed. He was sleeping. I was mesmerized. I'd never seen Adam look so peaceful. My whole body yearned to crawl into bed with him.

He slowly opened his eyes and looked at me. Once again my heart started pounding. I was too scared to speak.

“Hi! I remember you from earlier,” I smiled at him as he continued to speak, “Did you come to bring me a present? Look,” he pointed to the window sill covered with toys, balloons, and stuffed animals, “You can have a teddy bear if you want. Those are for girls and babies. Want to help me color?”

“Yes, I'd like that.” I walked over to the window and grabbed what he needed and brought it to him. I felt my throat constrict. I tried to ignore it.

I heard heels walk into the room. Adam's face lit up.

“Hi, Mom! Look, I made a friend. She's gonna help me color.”

His mother stared at me with a glare that made my hairs stick up.

“You're the young lady from earlier.” Her lips stayed in a straight line. She had an air of superiority to her. “Well, are you mute?” Her expression reminded me of one she'd given countless times before when she was growing impatient with someone.

“Yes, yes I am.”

She stepped right in front of me. I felt myself cowering. She only stood a few inches taller than me, but she was very intimidating.

“Explain yourself,” she ordered.

I started to grow nervous like I was under prosecution.

“I was looking for my uncle and ended up in your son's room by mistake,” I stuttered. I hated this woman for making me feel inferior.

“Why are you here?”

“My uncle's room is only a few rooms down. I heard the nurses talking about your son's situation and I was curious, so when I saw him here I thought I would come say hi and see how he was doing. His story is fascinating.”

“My son is none of your business.”

I felt like I had been slapped. I wanted to yell at her that he was; that I deserved to be here just as much as she did.

“I think it's time you left.”

I turned my head to look at Adam but he was busy trying to color, “Bye, Adam.”

He didn't look up. I was already forgotten.

I held it together all the way back to the car. When I slid into the back seat I lost it. The pain was too much. Haley scrambled into the back and wrapped her arms around me.

“Anna, what's wrong? Is Adam okay?”

I sobbed harder. I heard Jeremy get out of the car and walk away. Haley held me and stroked my hair.

Jeremy returned and slid back into the drivers seat. He twisted his body around and looked at Haley.

“He's okay. They ran some tests earlier, but so far everything appears normal. They don't believe he's suffered any brain damage.”

“What's wrong then, Anna?” Haley asked and I started to cry again.

Jeremy spoke up, “His brain still thinks he's eight years old.”

I looked up at him, “How did you find all this out in such a short time? I tried for hours.”

He gave me a huge grin, “I just flirted with the nurses.” He looked so proud of himself.

His answer made me laugh; I was glad they were here with me.

I looked to Haley, “He doesn't remember me and I'm not sure if he ever will.” I was having a hard time getting my words out from crying so hard.

“You can't give up! We'll go back every day. We'll bring things that might trigger his memory.” Haley looked determined.

“I can't, his mother found me in his room and basically told me to stay the hell away.”

“Then we'll just have to find another way.”

PART II

Chapter 12

Four Years Later

“Was it really necessary to bring this huge ass chair?” Haley complained, huffing as we climbed the flight of stairs to our new apartment.

“Was it really necessary to bring six boxes of shoes?” I snapped.

“We haven't even moved all the way in yet and you two are already fighting?” Jeremy scolded as he lifted most of the chair's weight. “I don't know why you two are griping, I've moved most of our stuff.”

“Sorry, Jeremy,” we answered in unison as we set the chair down in my new room.

“It's okay girls, now kiss and make-up,” he replied, casting us his most devilish smile.

“How many times are you going to try that one?” Haley complained, collapsing on my bed.

“Until it happens,” he answered confidently, laying down next to her.

“Maybe for your next birthday,” I stated casually, falling back into the chair.

He put a hand over his heart, “Don't say that unless you're serious.” He sat up and let out a long sigh, “I guess I better unload the rest. I'm assuming I'm on my own?”

I could tell he was waiting, hoping one of us would volunteer to help.

“I think you've got this covered. We would only get in your way,” I smiled sweetly at him.

He grunted and left to get the remaining boxes.

Haley turned her head to look at me, “Are you nervous for next week?”

“Not really. I'm assuming our second year of college won't be much different.”

“Yeah, I suppose. At least we don't have to live in dorms this year. That was awful. Closets that small should be outlawed.” She shuddered, remembering the horror. “Thank god we roomed together so my clothes could filter into your space.” She made it sound like it was a good thing that her clothes had extra space to devour. She had taken over our entire room with all of her stuff. “I think it will be a lot more fun this year. My sorority is already planning lots of mixers and I've already heard about loads of parties going on this weekend. Oh, don't give me that look. You might actually enjoy some of them. That is if you don't let Adam determine your mood.”

The mention of his name brought a stab of pain to my chest.

Haley sat up and slapped my knee, “Hey, don't let him bring you down.” I looked up at her and gave a weak half smile. “Seriously, Anna, I know last year was hard for you. Hell, the last four years, but you have to have faith that it will work out.” She got up, “I'm going to go order us Jeremy's favorite pizza to make him less grumpy.” She closed my door on her way out. I let out a huge sigh of relief that I finally had a moment to myself.

After Adam had woken up, all we could do was wait for an opportunity for me to get close. Jeremy kept track of everything he was doing, but being as secretive as his family was, there wasn't much to find out. All he did for the first few months was physical therapy to start regaining his strength. Then we went months not knowing anything, and I felt like I was going insane. I had to stop myself from spying behind a bush in front of his house all day, every day.

One day Haley had had enough of my moping. I'm not sure how she did it, but she found a way to get information from Charlotte's dad without giving away that we knew Adam. Apparently, he spent his days being tutored and getting physical therapy. They didn't let him go anywhere but the garden, for fear of the gossip. I was livid and my heart was in pain for Adam.

I was grateful to Haley because she was able to find out who both his tutors and physical therapists were. Again, I have no clue how she did it; she could probably find a way to get secret services to tell her anything she wanted.  Jeremy was able to hack into their systems and we started keeping track of Adam through their notes.

His tutors were amazed at how fast he was learning and advancing in maturity over the next year . They often wrote how it seemed “as if his brain somehow already knew the information.” We always got a good laugh out of that.

I had to start enduring life without him; It was strange. I found myself wanting to tell him so many things. I missed Adam every day, and some days it was unbearable.

Jeremy took me under his wing and forced me to start socializing at school. To my surprise I found myself liking some of them. I stopped doing my homework in the library to hang out with Jeremy and our little group of friends. Sometimes Haley even joined us. After school Haley, Jeremy, and I would hang out, unless Haley had a popularity thing to conquer. I saved my school work for after dinner to distract myself from the pain of missing Adam.

I didn't see Adam again until the summer before my senior year. That summer, the three of us went to a park his younger sister hung out at with her friends. We sat as close to them as we could, but nothing was ever said. Then one day she mentioned that her brother agreed to take them to see the midnight showing of the latest “epic trilogy.” She couldn't believe her parents had agreed to it.

Haley was bouncing with excitement. It still amazed me how determined Jeremy and Haley were with helping me find a way to be with Adam.

The following Thursday night we got in line as early as we could. I didn’t want to miss a moment of seeing Adam. I was shaking from the adrenaline overdrive. When they finally arrived I couldn't breathe and my stomach dropped to the floor. I couldn't stop staring at him. He looked so different. His unkept sandy blond hair was styled, and his normally soft brown eyes where harder, less expressive. I didn't see him smile even once. His body had changed too; it had filled out more. His shoulders were broader, his cheeks a little rounder, he was no longer lanky. I wouldn't have known it was him if I hadn't been purposely seeking him out.

His sister and her friend went to the concession stand not long after they arrived, so I followed. I had to scurry past people to make sure I got in line behind them. All they talked about was how dreamy the lead actor of the movie was. I was mentally begging them to say something about Adam. They were putting straws in their drinks waiting for their nachos when her friend finally mentioned something.

“Is your brother always this moody?”

“For the most part. My grandma says it's because he had to grow up in such a short amount of time, and my parents have him studying every second of the day so he can catch up to others his age.”

“Lame.”

Adam's sister shrugged her shoulders. They grabbed their food and went on their way.

“You gonna order anything?” The cashier asked as I stood watching them.

“Oh, yeah, sorry. Large coke please.” I paid and headed back in line.

“Anything?” Haley asked hopefully as she grabbed my soda and took a sip.

“No, just that he's moody, which his sister assumes is from being overworked.”

“Lame,” Jeremy said, gulping my soda.

I laughed, “That's the same answer her friend gave.”

The next few hours were boring as we waited in line. Thankfully Jeremy thought to bring cards, so we sat on the floor and played. Eventually I stood up to stretch and looked over in Adam's direction but he wasn't with them. I cursed myself for not keeping better watch. I scanned everywhere, but didn't see him.

“I'm going to the bathroom,” I quickly told them before hurrying off. I was taking a chance and I hoped I was right.

I was walking so fast I almost didn't see him getting water out of a vending machine. I was at a loss of what to say, but I knew I needed to speak up before he got back in line.

“Hey, aren’t you Adam?”

He turned to look at who was talking to him. He gave me an irritated look as I stepped forward. I felt like I was walking up to a stranger, which left a bitter taste in my mouth.

“I'm Annie.”

He raised his eyebrows as if to say “that's it?”

“Um, we used to go to school together,” I was fiddling with my hands knowing I was blowing it.

He looked me up and down with uncaring eyes, “Don't remember.”

He turned to keep walking. Without thinking I grabbed his hand, not knowing when I'd have another opportunity to be this close to him. He instantly yanked his hand away.

“Sorry, I just wanted to see if you and whoever you're with want to wait in line with us? We could catch up and help keep each other from getting bored? We are pretty close to the front,” I was rambling desperate for more time.

“Not interested.” He said it in a way that left me feeling like he was talking about me as well, then he walked away.

I was devastated. I grabbed Haley and Jeremy, and we left. Jeremy tried making me feel better by explaining that right now he was at the maturity level of a young teenager, but it didn't stop the tears from escaping.

My senior year had been uneventful. If it wasn't for Jeremy and Haley I would have lost my mind.

Jeremy and I went to prom together, something we both swore we would never do, but we wanted to watch Haley win Prom Queen. We were both so proud of her, she even got elected class president and valedictorian.

I was getting used to not having Adam around. We still followed anything we could find, but not much had changed.

One day Haley and I were hanging out playing video games in Jeremy's room (something I could never do with Adam but found it to be a blast) while Jeremy read out loud the latest notes on Adam. His parents still had him seeing a nutritionist that made him keep a food log to monitor what he was consuming, which was the same thing almost every day. He never had any caffeine, sugar, white flour, or processed foods. It broke my heart, I knew how much getting to taste food meant to him. I understood his parents wanting to keep his body healthy after the coma, but I just wished once in a while they'd give him a slice of pie or something. The physical therapist was proud of how strong his muscles and bones had gotten. He believed it was from the work they did while he was in a coma. The tutor was the most impressed with Adam. He learned in record speed and was close to getting his diploma, before us even.

“Interesting, I think we finally found you an in Anna.” Haley and I reached Jeremy's side in record time. “It looks like Adam and his tutor are talking about the possibility of college.”

“How is that even possible?” Haley asked.

“It's not that out there, he's almost done with high school and scored decent enough on his SATs that he could get into one.”

“I'm surprised his parents would want anything but ivy league.”

“His tutor wrote that it's Adam who's insisting.” I smiled, that sounded like him. “His parents think it's a bad idea, insisting that he's not ready. If he goes to college you're aware of what that means, right Anna?”

You bet I did.
We finally had a way for me to get close to Adam.

Adam's parents reluctantly agreed as long as he went to the local university, so naturally I did the same. Haley and Jeremy also applied but didn’t tell me at first. I finally felt a glimmer of hope. The rest of my senior year was a blur as my excitement for college overshadowed everything. I was glad Jeremy and Haley were coming with me; they helped keep me grounded and reminded me when I needed to focus more on the present.

Our first year of college was not what I had anticipated. Not once did I get to talk to Adam. He came to all his classes with a tutor and then left immediately after. The only social activity his family allowed him was pledging for the top fraternity.

I knew this year he was living at the fraternity’s house, and he would no longer have a tutor attend classes with him. I was hopeful once again.