Beginning with Forever (14 page)

“No more questions here, well, maybe just one.
How do you know my entire schedule?” I grill him, wondering how this man is able to access my information, overstepping some personal boundaries. It’s a little creepy to me, especially since we’ve just met several days ago.

“I make
it my priority to know everything about you.” His tone is completely serious, making me even more nervous. First, he tracked me down to the beach and now he knows my daily routine, hour by hour…maybe even by minute. I hope he’s not some crazy stalker. Really? Just the thought of it is absurd. A man as handsome and affluent as he is doesn’t need to stalk anyone. I’m positive he probably has women beating down his door daily for an opportunity to be with him.

I open the bag of clothes Amelia packed for me last night and pull out a pair of
capris jeans, a pink cotton t-shirt, and a sexy matching bra and undies set which doesn’t belong to me. There’s an amused look on my face as I force myself to suppress my giggles. I guess Amelia wanted to make sure I look
hot
for my mystery man. She’s unbelievably thoughtful and sweet. I’ll have to thank her tonight. Carson arches one thick, dark brow up, curls his lips sideways and gives me a look that says,
How incredibly sexy would you look in that?

Feeling quite embarrassed, I
sloppily hug the items into my arms and rush over to the bathroom to dress myself. There’s a brand new toothbrush and some feminine toiletries especially for me to use. He’s certainly attentive to details. After I freshened up, I walk over to the terrace to thank him with an innocent morning peck. My aim is for his cheek, but I end up on his lips instead. What a sly guy, he purposely turns his head so our lips would meet. “I can get used to starting my mornings like this, thank you,” I whisper against his mouth while blushing.

He licks his lip
s, savoring the kiss he practically stole from me. “Give me the okay, and I can definitely make it happen for you.” He detains me in his arms and helps himself to more of my lips, enjoying our playfulness.

____________________

The drive to school is peaceful with a cheery, golden sunrise that reminds me of a radiant sunflower. Pathology is what I’m trying to absorb as Carson centers his attention on the GPS direction. His reflecting eyes are completely distracting, pulling me away from my focus. “Carson, what are you thinking about?” I interrupt his pondering, wanting to know what’s consuming his thoughts, the morning after our first night together.

H
e reaches over for my right hand, brings it up to his lips, kisses along my knuckles and says, “Why couldn’t I have you in my life sooner?” The sincerity in his tone is crystal clear.

“Because I
’d be jailbait,” I tease him and giggle.

He g
ives out a throaty laugh. “I was wrong about my first impression of you. You’re not coy at all. You’re independent, strong willed, and most definitely capable of handling yourself.” He looks impressed and almost proud.

“By the way, is it rude for a woman to ask a man his age?
” I, of course, already know this information from his medical record, but wanted to see his reaction when he tells me we’re ten years apart.

“Would you l
ike to know how old I am, Lily?” He narrows his eyes and gives me a playful and skeptical look.

“Well…yes!”
I excitedly urge him.

“I’m thirty-t
wo.” There’s a combined look of guilt and hesitance on his handsome face as he anticipates my reaction.

“Wow, you’
re really old!” I continue to tease him.

He laugh
s and pretends to look hurt at the same time from my old age comment. “Ouch! That hurts, Lily. I didn’t think you had that in you.” He releases my hand and presses his hand to his heart as if I just stabbed it with my evil comment. “Just to let you know, along with old age, there’s wisdom and perfected skills,” he adds and looks over at me with his sultry eyes.

“Is that so?
I can’t wait for you to share some of your wisdom and perfected skills with me.” He smiles and shakes his head at my amateur flirting. I enjoy this more personable side of Carson. He’s not as arrogant and cold as I initially pegged him to be.

Carson
reluctantly drives up to a gated entrance. I flash the guards my school ID badge and they grant us permission into the school with friendly smiles. The idea of leaving him for a few hours is already unsettling. How did I let him affect me so easily? The answer is obvious, just look at him. He’s everything a girl wants in a single package; sexy, charming, thoughtful, attentive and mysterious. I hope he doesn’t catch me visually lusting over him while I pretend to study my notes.

My gawking stops the minute the SUV stops. “
Where should I drop you off?” Carson asks, and I point to a sign for Journey Hall. He pulls up along the sidewalk and puts his SUV in park. Carson is promptly on my side with the door opened before I can even reach for my books in the backseat. He offers his arm while unloading my books from me and then closes the door. I grab my books from him as he proceeds to lean into me. Automatically, I step backward and fall against the metal door. He steps forward and cages my body against the SUV between his long, toned arms. His focus is only on me while locking his beautiful eyes with mine.

“Thank you for an amazing time
,” he whispers into my ear. Curious eyes target us, but it doesn’t faze him. He tilts my chin up and plants an intense kiss, one that I know will stay with me for the rest of the day. He pulls away, leaving me tongue-tied and verbally unresponsive. “I’ll meet you here at 12:30 p.m. sharp. Don’t keep me waiting because every minute counts when I spend them with you.” All I could do is nod my head in response while trying to hide my satisfied expression. It puts an instant smile on his face, knowing his kiss is responsible for my reaction.

I finally break free from his trance
and assure him, “I’ll be here at 12:30.” He watches my unsteady legs carry me towards Journey Hall, waves his hand and then drives away.

Amelia had witnessed my knee-buckling moment with Carson
. She was among the crowd of curious, staring eyes. Her arm excitedly waves me over to our usual seats, and I’m ambushed with a hundred questions before I could even sit down. Thank god Richard isn’t here yet. “Shh…Ame, I’ll tell you everything tonight, but you have to keep it on the down-low when Richard gets here. I need to explain Carson to him. I owe him at least that much.” She pretends to zip her lips shut and sticks her pinky finger out to me. I roll my eyes at her while linking my pinky with hers. Amelia is super smart, but I sometimes wonder if her parents sheltered her too much. She can be such a big kid sometimes.

Richard
greets me with a simple, “Hi,” and then takes his usual seat to my right. He seems withdrawn as he stares directly at the professor’s podium with tunnel vision. I have to talk to him soon. His stiff body language tells me he’s upset about something or with someone. Obviously, it’s me since he refuses to look into my eyes. I can’t imagine how more disappointed he’ll be when I tell him I can’t meet for lunch today. Forcing myself to stop overthinking, I relax in my seat, and direct my attention to Professor Roentgen.

Minutes later, I’m restless again. I
t’s impossible for me to concentrate, knowing Richard is unhappy because of me. I fidget restlessly in my seat while I plan out my talk with him. My eyes avoid his as I formulate the words I think will hurt him least. But no matter how I put it, the truth is, Richard isn’t the man my heart wants. I’d be lying if I said we didn’t have any chemistry between us. However, with Richard, my emotions are suppressible, but with Carson, it’s impossible. He makes me desire things I thought I could wait for until later on in life.

Richard
finally turns to look in my direction, but still avoids any prolonged eye contact. I think he’s noticing that I’m not taking any notes like I routinely do. A concern expression spreads across his face, causing me more anxiety and guilt. Fortunately, the class ends, and we make a mad exodus for the next one. Seeing how tense he already seems, I decide our talk can wait until we’re finished.

The
second class drags on forever, and I’m thankful when it’s finally over. My anxiety feels like the carbonated pressure behind a well shaken soda can ready to explode. Richard leads the way to our usual seats in the lunch room. I elbow Amelia subtly, signaling her to disappear, so I can have a private moment with Richard. She fabricates an excuse about leaving something back at our room and will meet us in a few minutes.

My
palms are clammy, and my tongue is all knotted up. I’m struggling to find the considerate words I’ve been practicing over and over in my head. It’s not going to be easy no matter how prepared I think I am. “Richard, I don’t know how to tell you this. I’m…um…going to meet Carson for lunch today. We’ll be seeing more of each other. Please don’t be upset with me,” I release in one big breath. My eyes are moist, and I’m fighting hard to hold back tears as my voice becomes shakier. The idea of hurting anyone’s feelings torments me. I don’t want to be the cause of anyone’s sadness.

He looks both
troubled and wounded. He’s also at a loss for words. Finally, he takes my hands into his and says, “Lily, I’m hurt that you didn’t give me a fair chance to show you how much I care for you. I know you’d feel differently about me if you did. But no matter what happens, I’ll always be here for you. This will never change. I care for you more than you’ll allow yourself to know.” His voice remains soft and brittle.

“Richard, please don’t be hurt because of me. You know how much I care for you.
Both you and Amelia are the closest friends I have on this island. I cherish what the three of us have.” My tone is pleading and shaky while my eyes immediately well up with emotions, but I refuse to show him tears. It’ll only add misunderstanding to his already disheartened state. He pulls me into his chest and hugs me tightly. I slowly drop my guards, and welcome the comfort of his caring arms. Since the first day we met on the plane, Richard has continued to be a nurturing friend, always offering a hand to me whenever I need it. This is why I’m struggling so badly. I hate that I’m the cause of his sadness.

I know t
his soothing moment has to eventually come to an end, but I let him appreciate it just a tad bit longer. “Richard, I have to go,” I tell him glumly. Disappointment is painted all over his face as I break away from his embrace. I leave a bittersweet kiss on his cheek and gesture for him to release his hold of me. Sadly rejected, he drops his arms to his sides, and I slowly walk away.

Carson
is punctual as he said he would be with his SUV parked in the same spot as this morning. The door to my side is promptly opened the second our eyes meet. I try my best to conceal my fragile emotions as I walk closer to him. I don’t want to have to explain my Richard situation to him. We’ve barely known each other, but a few days, so I don’t feel like I owe him any explanations. His face is intimidatingly expressionless as I approach him. What could possibly have happened in the elapse time between us to leave him in this kind of state? No friendly
hello
. I’m baffled by his quick change in mood. “Hi, how was your day?” I try my best to deter his unpleasantry with a forced smile.

“Fine
,” he responds curtly with narrowing eyes. His temperament is bothering the heck out of me. At this point, I debate whether I should get into his SUV or walk away. We definitely don’t know each other well enough for him to act like a total prick, but I do anyways against my better judgment. He shuts the door behind me with a loud slam, startling me in my seat. I can feel my temper slowly rising, but I force myself not to act on it, so I look straight ahead to avoid his tapering eyes.
One Twizzler, two Twizzlers, three…
,
I count in my head to level my erupting mood that’s about to detonate. Candy always seems to sweeten up any situation for me, especially Twizzlers. If only I had some right now, I can chew my irritation away. With a phony smile, Carson waves at the red uniform guards as we drive off in testy, stark silence. My eyes can’t refrain from rolling. Once we exit the campus and hit the main road, he carelessly speeds off. Now I’m pissed. “Carson, stop this damn vehicle!” I yell out. “Let me out if you’re going to continue to act like a jerk! I don’t want to die because of your recklessness,” I angrily demand.

Carson is stunned as he slows the SUV down. I’m guessing he’s never been called a jerk
by a woman. Well, let this be his first and not his last time either. My heart is beating so rapidly that I swear I can almost hear it. I hate confrontations, but I hate skin-crawling behaviors even more. He parks the SUV along the side of the road with the blinking emergency lights on. The thick silence between us is slowly cut with his deep, accusative voice.  “I saw you in Richard’s arms, hugging and sealing whatever it was with a kiss. Would you care to explain yourself?” He moves his arms in front of his chest and crosses them tightly. His burning green eyes and crude tone tells me he’s jealous. Carson’s possessiveness doesn’t suit him, but this time I can’t fault him altogether, I did look rather guilty.

“Richard and I are good fr
iends. I had to explain to him why I chose to have lunch with you instead of him.” My voice is mellow, hoping to smother my temper.