Beautiful Mess (6 page)

“No,
it’s not that.  He’s totally supportive.  He just knows it’s hard to
make a living in the art world, and wants to make sure I have a backup plan.”

“Oh,
good,” she was relieved.

“What
about you?”

“I
really want to be an editor.  I’m going to go to Stanford, as long as I
don’t do anything stupid and mess it up, and major in English.  Then, I
might stay at Stanford and get my master’s degree, or I might go to New York,
and get it there.  I’m not quite sure yet.”

“Wow! 
It sounds like you’ve got your whole future all planned out already.”

“Well,
yeah.  You make it sound like a bad thing or something.”

“Oh,
no, not at all.  Nothing wrong with knowing what you want and where you’re
going.”

Their
food arrived, and they took a break from the heavy stuff, and talked about some
lighter subjects.  After sharing a delicious Tres Leches, they headed out
to the pier.  They wandered around the carnival-like atmosphere, played
some games and rode some rides.  It was the best time Bri had ever had on
a first date.  In fact, it didn’t feel like a first date at
all.   Except for those first few moments, there was no nervousness
or awkwardness.  It was surprisingly comfortable being around Cole. 
He was so personable and easy going, and he could make her laugh like no one
else could.

In
fact, the only thing Bri found difficult about the whole evening was keeping
her eyes off him.  She noticed the way his gray eyes lit up when he
smiled, and the way his hair fell across his forehead and into his eyes.
 And she was definitely aware of how hot his butt looked in those
jeans.  She was happy to find that Cole seemed to be having trouble
keeping his eyes off her, too.  This, combined with the way she felt drawn
to him, was beginning to make her nervous.  She hadn’t felt this way about
anyone in a long time, and it scared her.  She barely knew him.  She
shouldn’t be feeling this attracted to him already.  She was more aware of
him than anything else around her, and that set off warning bells in her head.

But
then Cole would catch her eye, and flash her a brilliant smile, and all her worries
would fade away.  Her heart would start fluttering, and there was nothing
but the way he lit her up inside.  Her body couldn’t get enough of it,
even if her brain was wary.

In
fact, her body was begging her for more as Cole walked her out to her car. 

“Well,
this is me,” she stopped next to her Mazda.  She fidgeted with her keys,
nervously.

Cole
took a step closer, catching her eyes and holding her gaze.

“I
had a really great time tonight,” she smiled, her heart picking up at his
closeness.  “More fun than I’ve had in a long time.  Thank you.”

“I
had a great time, too,” he said softly.  His eyes seemed to darken in the
moonlight.  He reached out slowly, almost like he couldn’t stop himself,
and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. 

Bri’s
breath caught as his hand moved slowly from her hair, tracing her cheek and jaw
with his fingertips.  Her heart began pounding as he leaned in closer.

Cole’s
lips inched closer to hers, and Bri’s body rejoiced.  It begged for
permission to press itself up against him, tangle her fingers in his hair, and
kiss the crap out of him.  She was shocked at how much she wanted this,
how much he already affected her.

His
lips were just millimeters from hers, when her brain started working again, and
all of her earlier fears and doubts came flooding back.  She had been
right, she wasn’t ready for this.  Things were moving too fast. 
Panic gripped her, and she forced herself to act.

“Wait,”
Bri whispered desperately, just before their lips met.

“Okay,”
Cole paused, his eyes darting up to hers questioningly.  “I’m waiting...”

“Cole,
I’m sorry, but I can’t,” she pleaded.  Her body and mind were at war with
each other, and it practically tore her in two to say that.  She couldn’t
hide the pain in her voice, or on her face, and she felt tears forming in her
eyes.  Cole let out a sigh and straightened.  Seeing her stricken
expression, he gently grabbed her shoulders, ducking his head a little to look
right in her eyes.

“Hey,
it’s okay,” he assured her.  “What’s wrong?”  He looked genuinely
concerned.

“It
has nothing to do with you, I promise.  It’s all me.”  Cole’s
disappointment cut through her, and she felt she had to explain.  “I know
this will sound incredibly lame, and like a total cliché, but... the truth is,
I went through a pretty rough break up and I’m just not ready for this
yet.  I just don’t think I have it in me to start anything romantically
right now.”  She felt a tear slip down her cheek as she realized just how
much she wanted Cole to kiss her, and what a bad idea that would be.  “I’m
sorry if I gave you the wrong impression, or led you on or anything, but... I
just
can’t
.”  More tears began falling now.  “I’m so sorry.”

“Oh,
hey, don’t cry,” Cole pulled her into his arms and held her.  “It’s
okay.  I understand.  Am I a little disappointed?  Only because
I’ve been wanting to kiss you all night.  But you’re not ready, I get
that.  How about this,” he pulled back so he could look at her. 
“What if we try just being friends first?  None of this romantic
stuff.  We just keep getting to know each other as friends for a while?”

“You’d
want to do that?” Bri sniffed doubtfully.

“Of
course!  You’re still the most interesting girl I’ve ever met.  And I
was serious when I said I wanted to know everything about you.  What do you
say?”

Bri
smiled.  “I think I’d like that very much.”

“Good,
me too!” he smiled back.  “Just so I’m clear, hugs are allowed, right?”

Bri
laughed and pulled him back to her.  “Of course,” she said in his
ear.  It felt so good to be held in his arms, that for a minute she
questioned her decision.  But this was for the best.  It was better
to be smart, take things slowly, be cautious, rather than just jump blindly
into something.

And
so, sooner than she would’ve liked, she released Cole and unlocked her door.

“Bye,
Cole.  Thank you.”

“Bye,
Ambria.  Have a good night.  Oh, Bri?” he called as she got into her
car.  “Come visit me down at the beach next week?”

“I’ll
be there Monday,” she smiled, and closed the door.  She checked her
rearview mirror as she drove away.  Cole stood there, watching her, until
she was out of sight.

Of
course, Bri’s dad was waiting up for her in the living room when she got home.

“So,
how’d it go?” he asked innocently.

Bri
smiled.  She was so onto him.  “It was fun.  I had a really good
time.  Cole is a lot of fun.”

“Good,
I’m glad.  Did anything… interesting happen?”  And there it was.

“Actually,
yes,” she paused, enjoying his stricken expression.  “We decided that we
are just going to be friends for a while.”

Connor
exhaled loudly in relief.  “That’s fantastic, Pumpkin!”

She
gave him the evil eye.

“No,
I mean it’s good that you are taking things slowly.  You barely know this
boy.  No reason to go jumping right into a relationship.  It’s good
you’re being careful.”

“Right,
Dad.  You’re just relieved there weren’t any bodily interactions
tonight.”  She leaned down and kissed her dad’s cheek.  “Night,
Daddy!”

“Goodnight,
Sweet Pea.”

Bri
walked off to her room. 

“Oh,
and Dad?” she turned.  “Cole’s last name is Marra.”

“Well,
I’m glad you covered that important piece of information.  Anytime you
want to bring you new friend by to meet your dear, old dad,  you just let
me know.  I got the shotgun all cleaned and ready to go while you were
gone!”

Bri
shook her head and headed into her room.  Different versions of how the
night could’ve ended between her and Cole swam through her head as she fell
asleep.

Monday
morning dawned bright and warm.  Bri waited until Summer left to take the
boys to the zoo, before hopping in her car and heading down to Venice Beach.

Cole
was busy drawing, and didn’t notice her approach.

“Hey
there!”

He
looked up and smiled as he quickly shut his sketch pad.

“Hi! 
I was wondering if you’d show up,” he teased.

“I
brought you something,” Bri held up the two cups in her hand.  “I didn’t
know what flavors you liked, so I got two and you can pick.”

“You
brought me a present!  Someone’s been thinking about me!”

“If
by “thinking about you” you mean that I was thinking it was hot today, and you
might like something to cool you down, then yes.”  She held out the two
Slurpee’s.  “Take your pick, Mountain Dew or Orange Fanta?”

Cole
grabbed the Dew Slurpee.  “Thanks Ambria!  Seriously, this was a
really nice surprise.”

“What,
your other friends don’t stop by to visit and bring you treats while you work?”

“No,
my friends never come down here.  They prefer Newport or Hunting
Beach.  I’m on my own out here.”

“Really? 
That kind of sucks.”

“It’s
not a big deal,” he brushed it off.  “Besides, I usually have a steady
stream of potential customers to keep me company,” he smiled wolfishly.

“And
those potential customers wouldn’t happen to be bikini clad girls vying for
your attention, would they?”  Bri raised her eyebrow.

“What
can I say?  Business is good!”

She
gave him an indignant slap on the arm, making him laugh.

“Come
on over, I saved a seat for you,” Cole unfolded a camping chair for her and
motioned for her to sit.

“Oh,
you brought me a chair,” she mimicked his tone from earlier.  “Someone was
thinking about me!”

“Ever
since you left the other night,” he replied, unabashedly.

Bri
felt her cheeks heating, and quickly changed the subject.  “So, I know you
like to paint.  What else do you like to do?”  She took a sip of her
Slurpee, and tried to ignore the way her heart picked up as he sat down next to
her.

“I
like to surf, play sports, mainly football and basketball, hang out at the
beach, play video games.  And me and my dad like to go camping and
boating.  What about you?  What do you do for fun?  Besides
reading.  I already know that one.”

“I
dance.”

“Really?”
Cole got a wicked gleam in his eyes.  “As in...?” he lifted his eyebrows
suggestively.

“Ew,
no!  Not that kind of dancer!  Perv!”  She shoved him, laughing.

“I
know.  I was just messing with you.  You wear way too many clothes to
be a stripper!” he laughed.  She went to hit him again, harder this time,
and he threw his hands up.  “Okay, okay, no more stripper jokes!  So,
you do ballet and stuff?”

“Among
other things.  I was a captain on the dance team at my old school, and I
taught at my studio for a couple of years.  My dad’s been working the
principal, trying to get me an audition for the team here.  But he’s
getting some resistance.  I also like to run, play tennis, and I also like
to hang out at the beach.  I love the ocean.”

“You
in one of those tiny tennis skirts… now that I have to see!”

“Ha,
ha!  And I’m dying to see you squeezed into some of those tight football
pants!”  Bri had been joking, but an image of Cole’s butt in said pants
flashed through her mind, and suddenly she wasn’t so sure anymore.

He
grinned wickedly.  “You just name the time and place and I’ll be
there!  Me in my pants, and you in your skirt.  Or, better yet, some
of those tight dance pants, the ones that show off your butt!

She
raised her eyebrow at him.  “I thought we were just going to be friends
here.  This is coming dangerously close to flirting.”

“Flirting?”
he scoffed.   “This is totally platonic, friendly banter.  I
can’t help it if
you
are trying to flirt with
me
.”

“Whatever,
Cole.  You just keep living in that deluded world of yours,” she laughed.

“As
long as you come visit me in those sexy dance pants!”

Bri
stayed a little while longer before deciding it was time to head home. 
True to his word, Cole was on his best friend behavior.  They exchanged
phone numbers, she hugged him goodbye, and drove home.

A
couple of hours later, Bri’s dad called her from work.

“Hi
Pumpkin, how’s it going?”

“Good
Dad, what’s up?”

“Just
wanted to let you know that I heard from the principal today.  She’s
convinced the dance team advisor to give you an audition!”

“Seriously? 
That’s great!”

“She
wants you there Friday at noon, and she wants to you perform one of your routines
from your old team.  Friday is their last practice before they break for
the rest of summer until school starts.  So, remind me to send you with a
check for fee’s and uniforms, just in case.”

“Okay. 
Thanks Dad, I know how hard you’ve been pushing for me.”

“Just
don’t let me down, Pumpkin.”

“Have
I ever done that?”

“Not
once!  Love you!”

“Love
you, Dad!  Bye!”

Bri
was so excited.  She decided to try out the whole texting Cole thing, and
let him know.

That’s
great! 
He texted back. 
You’ll have to come
down and show me your stuff.  I can let you know if you’re good enough for
the team. :)

Yeah
right!  Like I’m going to dance out on the boardwalk at the beach. 
People will think I’m nuts.

No
way, you’ll totally fit in out here.

He
did have a point.  She might even make a couple bucks while she was at it.

I’ll
think about it.

Just
make sure you wear those tight dance pants, or all bets are off for my help!

Friday
managed to sneak up on Bri rather quickly.  She’d been practicing all
week, though she’d declined Cole’s offer of dancing for him on the beach. 
Although she was confident she would make the team, she walked into the gym
feeling slightly nervous.  Of course, the twenty or so pairs of eyes
scowling at her and judging her didn’t help.

Turned
out, her audition was going to be in front of the advisor and the whole team,
who were eyeing her disdainfully.  Not about to let a bunch of teenage
girls psych her out, Bri straightened her shoulders and glided into the gym,
her head held high.

The
audition was fairly simple, and fairly quick.  Bri was asked to do a few
technique combinations, and then performed her routine from her team in
Dallas.  It was a routine that she had choreographed, and she made sure to
tell them that.  By the time she finished, the looks of disdain were
replaced by shock, and even some grudging acceptance and respect.  Bri was
asked to wait outside while the team deliberated.  It took only five
minutes for her to be called back in.

“Welcome
to the team!” the advisor, Belinda, hugged Bri.  “We’re so excited to have
you!  We think you’ll fit in beautifully!  And now,” Belinda guided
her to the gym door, “we have a few things to take care of.  The rest of
you are dismissed.  See you bright and early the first day of school!”

Belinda
pulled Bri into her office, and spent the next hour taking measurements, going
over practice schedules and team rules.  She gave Bri a list of required
items, including practice wear and team makeup.  Belinda’s face brightened
when Bri handed her a check paying all her dues in full.

“I
knew you’d fit in here!  We resume practices again at 6:00 am, on the
first day of school.  Feel free to call me if you have any questions at
all!”

Bri
walked out to her car, beaming.  She’d promised Cole she would call when
she found out, but she decided to stop by and tell him in person.  She did
call her dad, who was almost as anxious as she was.

“That’s
great, Sweet Pea!  I knew you could do it!” her dad exclaimed.  “They
are dang lucky to have you!”

“Thanks
Dad!  And, thanks for fighting for me.”

“Always,
Pumpkin.  Well, it all seems kind of official now, doesn’t it? 
Registration is in two weeks, and school starts two weeks after that. 
It’ll be here before you know it!”

Bri’s
stomach shifted nervously.  Four weeks of freedom until school
started.  She wasn’t sure she was quite ready to face life at a new
school.  But summer wasn’t over yet, and  she was determined to make
the most of the time she had left.

After
hearing the good news, Cole insisted on taking Bri out that Saturday to
celebrate.  They met at a sushi joint in town.  As Cole smiled at
her, Bri stopped, shocked.

“Okay,
what color
are
your eyes, exactly?”  She was utterly
confused.  The gray eyes she was used to seeing weren’t gray tonight, but
a dark blue.  Though they were no less sexy, it kind threw her that they’d
changed.

Cole
laughed.  “Well, they are officially hazel.  But they kind of change
color depending on what I’m wearing.”  He motioned to his dark blue
shirt.  “They look blue when I wear blue, or green if I wear green.”

“Okay,
that is really cool!  I wish my eyes could change color,” Bri was jealous.

“I
kind of like your eyes just the way they are,” Cole smiled.  “They are
like a cool, golden brown.  Almost the same color as your hair.  I’ve
never seen eyes like yours before.”

She
blushed, and he led her into the restaurant.  Bri had to remind herself
that there was a very good reason they were just going to be friends, though
sometimes it was hard to remember exactly what it was.  They spent the
night talking and laughing, and finding out they had even more in common than
they’d thought.

The
next couple of weeks flew by.  Bri would go visit Cole at “work”, and they
would meet to go run, or grab lunch a couple times a week, and they would go
out on Saturday, as friends.  So, they saw each other almost every
day.  Bri hoped she wasn’t coming off as clingy or needy, but Cole seemed
to enjoy their time together just as much as she did.  And, to his credit,
he hadn’t tried to kiss her again. 

Bri
decided that it was probably time to invite Cole over to her house.  They
had been meeting everywhere, so neither of them had been to the other’s
house.  It had seemed too personal before, but now that she and Cole were
well established friends, she felt it was time. 

They
had planned to meet Tuesday morning to run.  There was a park about
halfway between their houses that they had been running at.  It had a lot
of great trails and paths.  So after their three mile run, Bri brought it
up.

“Hey,”
she said to Cole as they were stretching.  “Do you want to come over to my
house and grab a drink or something?”  She tried to sound nonchalant, but
her heart started pounding nervously.

“Really?” 
He was obviously caught off guard by her invitation.

“Sure! 
That’s what friends do, right?  Hang out at each other’s houses, annoy
each other’s parents.  Only my parents won’t be there.”  Bri had
purposely picked a day when Summer and the boys wouldn’t be there.  Her
brothers had a gymnastics class that morning, not that the little monkeys
needed any more encouragement.  Then they had a lunch date with one of
Summer’s friends.  They wouldn’t be back until early afternoon at the
earliest.