Authors: Elda Minger
Danielle – she thought it was Danielle – practically spit her nipple out. The nurse tried again, showing Mel how to stroke the tiny cheek with her nipple, but the baby fussed and started to cry.
“Maybe her sister,” the nurse suggested. She unwrapped the second tiny bundle, flicked her feet gently to wake her, then handed her to Mel.
It was more of the same.
They hate me. They hate me because I didn’t bond with them the minute they were born.
They
did
seem more comfortable with the nurse. She bit her lip and handed her daughter back.
“I guess I’m not very good at this.”
“Oh, no. We fed them in the nursery. They probably aren’t even hungry.”
They probably don’t like me.
“Can I hold them?”
“Of course.”
Both babies simply slept, oblivious to who was holding them. Mel didn’t dare wake them, suddenly realizing she had absolutely no idea what she was doing with two children.
The thought of taking care of them overwhelmed her. She’d have to start looking for another place to live. Bubba wouldn’t –
But he would. She remembered the way he’d cried in the delivery room, the expression on his face when he’d looked down into his daughters’ eyes.
“I’m still kind of tired,” she admitted to the nurse.
“Of course you are,” she said, taking the sleeping babies smoothly out of her arms. “I’ll wake you for the next feeding.”
“I’d appreciate that.”
* * *
When she woke up again, Bubba was sitting in the chair next to her bed. One side of his face was discolored, a purple, shiny bruise prominent on his cheekbone.
“What happened?” She tried to scramble over toward him but winced as her body protested.
“Your brother and I had a little talk.”
“Donnie? Here? Oh, no!”
Bubba sighed. “He came up with your folks and overheard the nurse congratulating me. He figured out the rest for himself.”
She touched his face gently, careful not to hurt him. Damn her brother Donnie and his self-righteous attitude! Why couldn’t he just leave them alone?
Bubba closed his eyes tiredly. “He thinks we should get married.”
She stared at him, incredulous. The feelings of failure that had been washing over her since the birth of her twin daughters finally peaked.
We should get married.
Not
I want to marry you.
Well, no one else was going to run her life. Not now. Not ever.
“No.” Her voice was low.
He opened his eyes. For a moment her heart went out to him, he looked so tired.
“Mel, it’s different now. We have two other people to consider.”
The babies. Donnie. The world. Damn it, Bubba, want me for myself.
But why should he? She was the only woman she knew who got not one, but
two
chances to breastfeed – and blew both of them.
Why would he want an incompetent like her to mother his children?
“You can have them. I quit.” There was nothing but quiet resignation in her voice.
“Mel, be reason – ”
“Or we can give one to your mother and one to mine. I’ll move out and things will be just like they were before.”
“Things are never going to be that way again, Mel.”
“Yes they will. We’ll make them that way.”
He stood up shakily. “I’m going to go home now before we both say anything more we’ll regret.”
“You do that.”
As soon as she heard his footsteps fade into the distance, she burst into tears.
* * *
What had happened?
Bubba lay on the couch in his living room. He couldn’t sleep. All he kept thinking about was the past twenty-four hours. He and Mel had been so close, had shared something so profound. Now they were further apart than when they’d started.
Why did Donnie have to come back into it?
He had to settle things with his friend once and for all. What happened between him and Mel was none of her brother’s concern. He had to make Donnie understand that.
What puzzled him was his friend’s – his ex-friend’s – attitude. He’d gone to college with Donnie, for God’s sake! He knew what excesses his college buddy had been capable of.
The sharp knock brought him out of his moody thoughts. He swung his legs over the side of the couch and headed slowly toward the door. If it was Donnie, he wasn’t going to answer.
It was Joanie. He let her in, relieved it was someone who was relatively uncomplicated. Joanie had accepted his love for Mel with good-natured grace. She was currently dating a stockbroker but he knew the guy bored her. Joanie lived for a challenge.
“Where’s Mel?” she asked, looking around.
“She’s in the hospital.”
Her eyes lit up. “Boy or girl?”
“Girls. Twins.”
“That’s great, Bubba! Congratulations!” She frowned. “You don’t look too happy about it.”
“I’m just tired.”
“Don’t pull that bull on me. Come on, spill it.”
So he told her, poured out everything he’d been thinking in the last hour. How he felt shut away from what was going on at the hospital. How Donnie was making himself a complete pain in the ass. How Mel had reacted when he’d asked her to marry him.
“I don’t understand her. I just don’t understand what she’s thinking.”
Joanie poured him a glass of wine. “Have you ever heard of the baby blues?”
For the next fifteen minutes, she filled him in on what she’d felt after her son was born. Joanie, married when she was seventeen and divorced shortly thereafter, told him all her feelings, her confusion.
“She probably thinks you asked her because of Donnie.”
“That’s ridiculous! She knows me better than that!”
“Bubba, women are never rational at a time like this. Wait, let me amend that. Maybe some women are but not Mel. Not from what you’ve told me. Hell, sometimes one baby is frightening enough. Twins? She must be ready to slit her wrists.”
When he looked up at her he was sure his terror showed in his expression.
“It was a figure of speech, Bubba. Mel isn’t going anywhere. But I want to hear more about this Donnie character. Where does he get off telling the two of you how to run your lives? And why is he so hard on Mel?”
They talked for two hours, ordered in a pizza, talked some more. Then Joanie made him get in the hot tub with her and relax. Afterwards, she dragged him back to the sofa and plopped him on it, bathing suit and all.
“Take your suit off as I go out the door but wait until you hear the door shut. I don’t want the Reverend Donnie to catch us together.”
He smiled. He and Joanie had made the transition from dating to friendship with ease. “You’re a pal, Joanie.”
“Sleep on it and call her in the morning, okay?”
* * *
Mel couldn’t sleep.
She’d managed to do an adequate job of nursing the twins that night and for a moment she’d wanted to call Bubba and share her feelings with him. But then she remembered the look on his face as he’d slowly walked out of her room.
She’d cried for almost an hour after he left. One of the nurses had sat with her, held her hand, urged her to talk about her feelings. Then she’d told her it was quite normal to feel completely overwhelmed after the birth of a child – let alone two.
So do you call him and apologize or hide in bed like a coward?
Her hand was inching toward her phone when it rang.
Bubba?
Her heart soared.
“Melanie. It’s Donnie.”
She felt sick to her stomach.
After listening to his harangue for two minutes, she said calmly, “Stuff it, Donald.”
“What!” He was sputtering now and she smiled. She’d been completely surprised when he’d backed off slightly the day of their argument. When had she finally realized her brother was ninety percent hot air?
“I said you can…” She described what he could do to himself in excruciating detail then disconnected their call.
She felt wonderful. All those years of childhood tyranny were finally in the past. Donnie making her do things he knew scared her. “Come on, Mel, if you jump off the garage roof you’ll fly.”
Well, she was flying now. What an insecure little creep he’d been.
And he had nothing to do with Bubba’s proposal. She felt more clearheaded after her cry, ready to pick up the pieces of her life and begin again.
Why not? She had the best man in the entire world who loved her and wanted to marry her, two beautiful daughters, a booming career, a supportive family – minus one – and enough energy to put things right again.
But most of all, she loved Bubba.
* * *
When the phone rang Bubba was so startled he fell off the couch.
“Hello. Who is this?” he asked belligerently, his words slurring slightly. Why was it he couldn’t seem to get any sleep?
“Bubba?”
Mel.
He fought his way out of the tangle of pillows and blankets Joanie had spread on the couch and sat up. “Mel? Are you all right?”
“I’m fine, Bubba. A little ashamed of myself, but fine.”
Was he hearing things? Was he talking again to the Mel he once knew? He clutched his cell phone tightly.
“About today…” she began.
“I phrased it all wrong, Mel. I didn’t mean – ”
“I know.”
She knows
. He closed his eyes and rested his forehead against his palm. The rest was going to be smooth sailing.
“So we still have that date we talked about?” he asked softly.
“As soon as I’m back to my normal size.” Her voice lowered to a whisper. “I love you so much, Bubba. I just want to be beautiful for you again. I want you to be proud of me.”
“Aw, Mel.”
Didn’t she know?
“I already am.”
* * *
“The banner goes over the fireplace, and the balloons…” Bubba reached for the package of pink and white balloons and handed them to Joanie. “The balloons go everywhere. I want this place crazy with balloons.”
“I’ve got my digital camera, the cake’s in the fridge, the nursery’s ready and the lasagna’s in the oven – ”
“Where’s Henry?” Bubba asked suspiciously. His furry friend was usually never far away from food.
“He’s sleeping in one of the cribs. He thinks you bought them both for him.”
“Wait till he sees the company he’s getting. He’ll wish we got that kitten instead.” He gave Joanie a quick kiss. “Thanks. I’m going to leave now. Mel should be just about ready to check out.”
“Drive carefully, Daddy. Don’t wrap your car around a tree.”
He blew her a kiss and rushed out the door.
What a guy
, Joanie thought as she began to blow up another balloon. It touched her, the way Bubba was so involved. He was nothing at all like Mike had been – he hadn’t even picked her up from the hospital. She’d been a frightened eighteen-year-old, knowing the only reason he’d married her was because she was pregnant.
Those days are behind you,
she thought as she tied off the balloon and set it down on the couch. Within fifteen minutes she had several balloons blown up and the banner taped in place along one wall.
“Welcome home, Melanie, Skip and Moondoggie.” She’d tried to make Bubba explain why he hadn’t used the twins’ real names – Danielle and Alexandra – but he’d simply laughed and pulled her hair, telling her he’d let her in on the joke when he brought Mel back.
He’d bought a special cake from Mel’s favorite bakery that was shaped like a surfboard. It seemed a little strange to Joanie, considering the twins were still infants, but it made Bubba happy and that was what mattered.
When she heard the impatient knock on the door, she cursed and carried the balloon she’d been blowing up with her as she walked down the short hallway. Swinging the door open, she looked up into dark blue eyes.
“Hi.” He was cute, a little reserved, but his mouth hinted at a sensual nature. She’d met so many guys like this one she could peg him with a glance. Stuffed shirts who went wild in the bedroom. Banked fires.
Interesting.
“Is Bubba home?”
“No.”
“Who are you?”
“I’m his maid,” she replied sweetly, deliberately making it sound like a lie. Something about this man made her want to annoy him.
“His maid? I don’t… is Mel here?”
“She’s coming home from the hospital today.”
“Today? Why wasn’t she home sooner?”
“Aren’t you the nosy one.” Here he was, expecting her to give him everyone’s life story on the front steps and she still had a million balloons to blow up and a lasagna in the oven.
She decided to give him a break.
“They give you more time with twins.” She smiled slowly. “Why don’t you come in… ”
“Donnie.”
Donnie.
This was
really
interesting – much more so than her stockbroker. “Why don’t you come on in and wait for them, Donnie? I’m sure they’ll be glad to see you.” As she remembered Bubba’s anguished night after Donnie had interfered, an amusing little plan began to form in her mind.
Oh, Joanie, you’ll fry in hell for this one.
He followed her inside and she started him blowing up balloons.
“Would you like a drink, Donnie?”
“Rum and Coke if you’ve got it.”
She filled the glass to the brim with rum and added a splash of Coke for color. As she handed it to him she said cheerfully, “Just let me check what’s in the oven and I’ll be right back. This’ll be a fun party, huh?”
She was aware of him checking out her body. She didn’t mind. She’d met Bubba at the health club and they’d become friends because of their interest in physical fitness. Joanie was proud of what she’d made of her life. One of the things that made her proudest was that she looked damn good.
She went into the kitchen, checked the lasagna, pulled it out and set it on the kitchen counter.
So far, so good.
Walking back out into the living room, she took a quick glance at Don’s glass. Half empty. Great. Slowly, with great deliberation, she peeled her cotton sweater over her head.
“It's hot in here, don’t you think, Donnie? Should I turn on the air conditioner or what?” She knew the bikini top she had underneath barely concealed her full breasts. She watched the way his eyes slowly devoured her.
Men. So predictable.