Azure (Drowning In You) (8 page)

It made sense. Fit in with stories of immigrants’ children she’d heard over the years. They wanted to blend in, not stand apart and be bullied for it.

“Your turn,” he said as their orders arrived, his sweet in a tiny metal plate, and her coffee in a Lilliputian cup, together with a large jar of water and two glasses. “The story of the ring tossed into the sea.”

She sipped the coffee and looked around for sugar. “This is bitter.”

“The ring story?”

“The coffee, actually.” Was it a bitter story, too? Her heart was bruised, not broken, she told herself again, and it was true. “Why did you want to hear about it, anyway? Maybe I just like tossing gold into the sea. It’s an old tradition. Offerings to the gods so they don’t get mad at you, or to be granted a favor.”

He stared at his sweet, but made no move to eat it. “You looked sad.”

Bummer. Talk about turning the tables.
Not to mention she’d promised Panos to make this guy laugh, when all the while Kai was concerned about her gloomy mood.
Terrific
.

But it warmed her inside. So sweet of him that he’d noticed. If only she’d noticed with
Andria
...

Don’t think about that.

“Tit for tat,” she said, gulping the bitter, scalding liquid to find her courage. “If I tell you the story, I want you to tell me one of yours.”

He stilled, his mouth tightening. “Like what?”

“Anything.” She reached for the water and he beat her to it, pouring them both a glass. “Or else, if you prefer, I can ask you three questions and you give me truthful answers.”

He put the pitcher down, his jaw working. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“It will be fun.”

“No, it won’t.”

“One question.”

He chewed on that, his dark eyes flicking to the sea and back at her. “You don’t really want to tell me the story of the ring,” he said.

Touché
. She didn’t, it was true. But it wouldn’t kill her. Answering a question from her seemed to be killing him, though.

Which only made her more curious.

“All right,” he said. “One question. But I want your story first.”

She smiled behind her glass. Then frowned, because she couldn’t avoid telling him any longer. But where to start? Better ease him into it.

“It’s an engagement ring,” she said and saw his eyes widen.

Yeah, so much for easing him into it.

“He left you?” he breathed, and she was instantly angry at him for thinking that.

“He proposed two weeks ago, actually.”

“Proposed.” Kai blinked and frowned. “Are we talking marriage here?”

“What do you think?” She put the glass on the table, watched the marks left by her fingers on the condensation, wrestled down the anger. Not Kai’s fault. “Yes, marriage. He proposed all formal, too, down on one knee, the whole nine yards.”

He tugged on the neckline of his tee, as if he couldn’t breathe, and leaned forward. “You refused.” It wasn’t a question this time.

Still, she nodded. “I did.”

He leaned back, letting go of his tee. He watched her as if reading her face. “But that’s not all.”

Damn right it wasn’t. But he wouldn’t know, would he? Nobody could. “It was too soon. I wasn’t ready. I didn’t feel...”
Didn’t feel like I loved him.
“He mentioned babies and a house, and I tried to picture myself with his kids, with him, and I couldn’t. I’ve only known him for a few months!” She shook her head.

He said nothing; seemed to be waiting for more, and she wondered yet again why she was telling him all this.

Maybe because he’d asked. Persisted. She hadn’t even told Kirsten what happened afterward, but he gave her that expectant look, as if it mattered to him, as if he really cared to know why she was sad.

“I said no. He said I’d come around. We had a huge fight.” The things he’d said... Horrible things. Too close to home. That she didn’t pay attention to others’ feelings, didn’t seem to notice or care. “I hadn’t known the ring meant anything. He bought it for me just a month after we started going out together. I didn’t think...” She never thought. That was her problem. “He was supposed to come to
Crete
with me, but after the fight we didn’t speak again and he didn’t show up at the airport, so... Here I am.”

With my heart bruised. Sort of shredded. But not broken.
Because she didn’t love Justin as she’d thought she did, and the way he’d smashed things and yelled at her during the fight told her there was a reason. Many reasons, probably. Anyway, it was over now.

 
“But you kept the ring,” he said, thoughtful. “You were still wearing it around your neck two days ago.”

“I guess I hoped we’d make up.” Though really, had she hoped that? She’d been confused, that much was true.

Her chest felt too tight and it wasn’t for Justin. No, it was all that had happened in the past year, rising up to choke her.

The soft noises of their surroundings — the low voices of the other customers, the rustling of leaves overhead, the clinking of spoons on dishes — rose to engulf her and she feared she might break down, right there, in front of this beautiful stranger who owed her nothing.

She wanted to run out of the cafe and find a quiet corner to sob. She hadn’t cried after the fight, hadn’t cried... in a long time.

Oh god, how mortifying.

His hand was suddenly on top of hers. “
Liv
. Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” She shook her head, her breath caught on a sob. “Yeah, I’m all right.”

“Here,” he said. “Try this.” He pushed the sweet toward her.

Glad for the diversion, she leaned forward and gave the sweet a suspicious look. “What is it?”

“Watermelon preserve.”

“You’re kidding me. Watermelon’s red, and this is a yellowish strip of something.”

“Watermelon rind, the white part between the red and the green. Cooked with sugar.”

“Really?”

“Try it,” Kai said again and she stabbed the small fork into the rubbery thing and lifted it to her mouth.

It was crunchy and very sweet. Flavored with something.
Cloves? Cinnamon?
She swallowed and looked up to find him staring, his eyes gone dark as night, his lips parted.

He licked them when he caught her gaze and looked away. His cheeks colored and it made her smile, lifted the weight off her chest.

Oh my god.
He was way too cute.

“It’s delicious.” She grabbed her glass, gulping down water. Her mouth was gummy with sugar. “Thank you.”

The sun was sitting low over the sea, a golden disk. The light reflected in the pebble she wore around her neck.

“What’s that?” He pushed his chair back and came around the table, a shadow against the sun. “Let me see.” He leaned over her, washing her in his scent, and lifted the pebble with his finger.

“Just a pebble I found on the beach.”

He hissed and let it go, his eyes darkening. “I’ll take you back to the hotel.” He turned, tossed some money on the table and left toward the car with big strides.

“What? Wait!” She grabbed her purse and ran after him. “It’s still early.”

“I need to talk to Panos.”

“Why?” She reached the car as he started the engine. She slipped inside and she’d barely closed the door when they were rolling out onto the road. “Why are you doing this?”

“Doing what exactly?” His teeth were clenched.

“Going off without explaining why. Last time it was when I said I majored in English literature,” there, a flinch, a tightening of his jaw, “and now because I gathered a pebble from the beach. What the hell is wrong?”

He said nothing, driving so fast the tires squealed.

“You promised to answer a question,” she said as they reached the main road and took the direction of
Kissamos
.

“I promised nothing,” he muttered, his eyes fixed straight ahead.

“Oh right. Be that way.”
Make me open my heart to you and then walk away.
She turned away from him, staring at nothing as they passed outside villages and restaurants. She saw a convenience store and reluctantly turned back toward him, catching a flash of his eyes before he was looking back at the road.

“Can you stop? I need to buy some water.”

“There’s a mini market closer to the hotel.” But he swerved and parked in front of the grocery store.

“Do you need anything?” she asked as she opened the door and stepped outside.

He shook his head, his face unreadable. “Just hurry up.”

Bastard.
Fuming, she stomped into the dimness of the market. A smell of must and stale bread hung inside. Fridges hummed at her right and she went and grabbed two big bottles of water. Two old men were talking in low voices at the cashier, stroking their huge, bushy mustaches and shooting her covert glances.

What?
She looked down at her shorts and sandals. She was decent, thank you very much. She paid and lugged the bottles outside. Dusk had gathered like a mist, blotting outlines and giving the car headlights a ghostly aura.

An old woman stood, bathed in the eerie light, wrapped in a black shawl and hunched over like a vulture. She was muttering in Greek, her gnarled hand making the sign of the cross over and over again. She shouted something unintelligible to Olivia, gesturing at the truck.

Then she spat twice on the ground, raised both hands, and turned to leave, still muttering. She disappeared among the trees by the side of the road.

Olivia frowned as she climbed inside the car. Kai was gripping the wheel tightly, his knuckles white.

“What was that about?” she asked.

“Nothing,” he whispered and revved up the engine. “Nothing new.”

 
***

Olivia was distracted when Kai left her at the hotel. So distracted, in fact, that she walked up to the reception desk, asked for her room key, took it and turned to go before she realized Panos was talking to her.

“Sorry?”

“I say, decided to leave the boy, come to the man?” He wagged his brows, grinning.

She sighed and shook her head. “I quit, Panos.”

“Quit?”

“I can’t do what you asked me. Can’t make him laugh.” She glanced over her shoulder, but Kai didn’t come in. “I’m not sure I want to spend time with him. His mood swings are so sudden... and he flips out over strange stuff, like this pebble.” She held it up for Panos to see. “Why? What’s this all about?”

He squinted at her new pendant and rubbed his chin. “A rock?”

“A rock.” She let it fall back against her chest. “And an old woman was swearing at him and spitting. Did he do something bad? Is he a criminal?”

“No criminal.” Panos’ face was serious. “No do nothing bad. Old people... old habits. How you call it?” He snapped his fingers. “
Superstit
.”

“Superstitious?”

“That. They think he do something bad, but they are wrong.”

She hadn’t wanted to pry, but this felt important. “So what did he do?”