At The Stroke Of Midnight (12 page)

That meant his only option was to
either give up the earldom or prevail upon his mother to change her mind.
 
As long as she relented, it did not matter
what Devonmont wanted.
 
Jane was of age
and free to marry him if she so chose.
 
He had already informed her father that her dowry did not matter.
 
He had his own fortune.
 
He did not need hers as well.

But he did need Jane.
 
And that, he feared, was not something that
could be easily changed.
 
If it ever
could be.
 
Hearts and minds were funny
that way.

He did not have a plan yet, nor any
idea how to avoid his fate or how to change it, but he was determined to do
so.
 
First thing in the morning, he
would send another messenger into London to see where his bloody solicitor
was.
 
Surely the man had found something
by now.
 
God knows, he was paying the
man enough that he should be able to work miracles.

Then, all thoughts of tomorrow were
gone as the door at the far side of the conservatory opened and Jane appeared
before him as if she was gliding on air, the pewter gray dress she had worn
earlier now thankfully replaced by something lighter.
 
She still looked pale and washed out in the frock, but it was better
than seeing the scorch marks that had relentlessly drawn his attention earlier.

Sebastian was so relived to see her
- whole, healthy and unharmed - that heedless of anything else, he rushed to
her side and swept her into his arms, gathering her close and raining kisses
down upon her.
 
It might be considered
unseemly in some circles but he didn't give a damn.
 
Jane was with him and unharmed.
 
It was a moment to celebrate.

When he finally pulled back, he
thought she might slap him for the liberty he had just taken.
 
After all, he had been far more brazen than
he ought.
 
Instead, she offered him a
dazzling smile, one that took his breath away and further ingrained in his mind
that they were destined for each other.
 
There could be no other woman for him.

"That was a lovely welcome,
indeed," she teased, relaxing into the circle of his arms and threading
her fingers through his hair.
 
"Though I have no idea what I did to deserve it."
 
Then she sighed and closed her eyes, some of
the light that had been radiating from her dimming a bit.
 
"Nor should I become accustomed to it,
I suppose.
 
But for tonight, I cannot
bring myself to care."

"Shhh."
 
Sebastian did not want to discuss the
future.
 
For the moment, he wished to
concentrate solely on the present.
 
"I am working on plans, sweetheart.
 
Let that be enough.
 
For
the moment, I merely want to hold you.
 
I want to know that you are well."
 
Then he dropped a kiss on the top of her head.

He thought she might protest, but
instead she snuggled deeper into his embrace, burrowing into him as if seeking
his warmth, though the conservatory was already beastly hot.
 
"This is nice."
 

Then she sighed when he tightened
his hold on her.
 
"Perhaps more
than nice."
 
He had no earthly idea
how he could give up this woman and find the same comfort in the arms of her sister.
 
It simply could not be done.
 
So he retuned Jane's sigh with one of his
own and simply stood there in the conservatory, allowing the heat to seep into
his bones and the scent of citrus and Jane to fill the rest of him.

For the first time since Sebastian
had taken over the earldom and become Covington, he felt at peace.
 
Jane did this to him.
 
She centered him.
 
More than that, she understood him.
 
They were of a like mind.
 
He knew that many of his peers did not care if their wives had a thought
in their heads.
 
In fact, many preferred
brainless, stupid wives, women like Lizzie who would be content with a babe and
a new gown as long as she believed she was getting her way and in control of
her husband.

Not Sebastian.
 
Perhaps it was because his own mother was so
strong or perhaps it was because his parents had enjoyed a marriage that was
also a true love match.
 
But Sebastian
wanted nothing less for himself.
 
It was
why he had never seriously courted a young woman, earning himself the
reputation of somewhat of a rake, and yet cold and aloof at the same time.
 
He was not.
 
He was merely choosy.
 
And, after
years of searching for the perfect woman, he had found her.
 
Jane.
 
His beloved, perfect Jane.
 
Jane,
who was nothing short of heaven in his arms.

Heaven was the only way Jane could
describe the way it felt to be held this closely and this tightly by Sebastian,
and even that was an inadequate word for the way he made her feel.
 
There was no single word she could think of
that would ever come close to containing all of the emotion that was in her
heart at the moment.

Cherished.
 
Desired.
 
Wanted.
 
All of those words were
good ones and she felt those things.

Most of all, however, she felt
protected.

When the fire from the game had
ignited her dress and glove, she had felt real fear.
 
It was icy and cold, snaking its way down her spine, even as the
fire licked at her fragile skin.
 
She
had thought, for a moment anyway, that she might die.
 
No one was supposed to die playing such a silly parlor game, but
in one moment of blinding clarity, she remembered the fire at Clover Hill and
the Aubusson rug that had ignited when the bowl of brandy tipped over, setting
the entire house ablaze.
 
In her mind's
eye, she had seen herself going up in flames as well, dying in the middle of
Blackstone's grand ballroom while everyone else did naught but watch.

Except Sebastian.
 
A part of her had known that he would rescue
her, both from the fire and from Rockville.
 
He, above all others, would not allow her to die.
 
She was not certain how she knew, only that
her heart never doubted, even when her head had.

Now, standing here in the warmth of
his embrace, she wondered how she could ever go on without him.
 
Though she also knew that she had no choice.

He was not hers to love.
 
He never would be.
 
Except that for these stolen moments out of time, she could
pretend that he was.

And that was precisely what she
would do tonight.
 
For this stolen hour
or so that they had alone, she would not think of tomorrow or what came next,
just as he requested.
 
Instead, she
would simply be with him.
 
She would
enjoy the time they had been gifted and not ask for more.

When she felt his grasp on her
loosen, she looked up at him to find him looking back at her, those magical
brown eyes of his deepening to an almost midnight black.
 
They swirled with emotions that she could
not define, making her worry that something was amiss, or that she had taken
his embrace far too seriously.
 
"Sebastian?
 
What is
it?
 
What troubles you?"

"You nearly died tonight,"
he choked out, his voice rough.
 
"I
stood there and almost watched you die.
 
Stupid, idiotic game."
 
Then
he closed his eyes as if the sight of her brought it all back.

Shaking her head, she pulled back
and stripped off her glove, offering him a look at her hand.
 
"I'm just a bit singled.
 
I will heal, though there might be a
mark."
 
Then she frowned as another
cold stab of fear ran through her.
 
He
had saved her life.
 
Did he truly not
understand that?
 
"Were it not for
you, my injuries might have been more serious, but they are not.
 
I am well, Sebastian."

She thought he would be happy at
her reassurances, but he was not.
 
Instead, he spun away from her, almost angry now.
 
"And what of the next time, Jane?
 
What then, when I am not there to save
you?
 
What happens when Lord Rockville
or another like him decides that he wants you for his bed but not to wife?
 
Who will save you then?"

So they were to discuss the future
after all.
 
Drat him, anyway.
 
She did not like it, but better to do so now
than become any more involved with him than she already was.
 
"Then I shall save myself."
 
She took a tentative step towards him.
 
"It is all I can do.
 
My future has been made plain to me, and
yes, my virtue will be at risk the moment I leave here for Scotland.
 
But I am also powerless to stop it.
 
As are you.
 
So therefore, I must learn to rely on myself for protection, however
ineffective that might be."
 
How
she would do this she had no idea but she also knew that there was no other
choice.

"Were I able..."
 
His words and his voice both failed
him.
 
The idea of Jane in another man's
bed, forced there because of circumstances she could not control sliced through
him like a dagger to the heart.
 
He
could not allow it, but neither could he prevent it, either.

"But you are not."
 
She took another step towards him and
reached out, laying her now bare hand on his arm, wishing she could feel his
skin beneath hers.
 
"Neither of us
are.
 
And in two days time, this,"
she waved her hand in the air, "whatever
this
is between us, will
end.
 
Your impending nuptials to my
sister will be announced and I will depart.
 
Those are events we cannot change."
 

Jane looked at him through large,
pleading eyes.
 
"So we have a
choice.
 
We follow the plan we have
already set out upon and spend the last few days of our freedom together or we
end this now.
 
This back and forth has
worn me, even though it has only been one day.
 
Either we are together until Christmas Eve or we are not.
 
I cannot continue to guess."

Looking at her lovely face, Sebastian
could see the pain and weariness there.
 
She deserved so much better.
 
She
deserved better than him certainly, a man not free to commit his life to hers,
damn his father and his mother both.
 
Her family too, while he was at it.
 
But he also knew he was too weak to let her go.
 
He wanted these last few days and he would
have them.

"Come here," he whispered
and reach for her, gratified when she entered his arms willingly.

She sighed with contentment once
more and he took that as a sign that she was precisely where she wanted to
be.
 
So when he brought his lips to
hers, more urgent this time, he allowed himself the freedom to plunder her
mouth and take what he desired just as he had in the sleigh earlier in the day.
 
She returned his kiss just as fiercely, pouring
all of her desire for him into that single moment.

He was undone, both with emotion
and desire.
 
So when he reached down to
tease her breast from the bodice of her gown, Jane did not resist.
 
Instead she pressed herself into his hand,
silently begging for more.

Sebastian felt himself grow
enflamed with even more need and, unable to stop himself, he lowered his lips
to her peaked nipple and began to suckle her, teasing the fire that he knew was
growing within her as well.
 
He wanted
more.
 
In fact, he wanted so much more,
but for the moment, this would have to suffice.

When Jane let out a keening cry of
delight as he palmed her other breast and began toy with her nipple, he knew
she felt the same.
 
The only question
remained, what to do about it.

The next morning, Jane was awake
well before dawn, even though she had only managed a few meager hours of
sleep.
 
Her body was still vibrating
from the delicious sensations Sebastian had been able to coax from her last
night.
 
Truly, she had not thought
herself capable of such desire or need.
 
Those were things reserved for other women, not her.

She was Plain Jane.
 
Or she had been.
 
Once.
 
She did not think
she was any longer.

Somehow, Sebastian had managed to
bring her to release twice, both times merely from touching her.
 
She shuddered to think what he might manage
were they both naked in a bed together.
 
At the same time, she also knew that it would never happen.
 
The next woman to share his bed would be
Lizzie.
 
Her father and Angeline had made
certain of that.

Pushing the troubling though aside,
she rose without bothering to call for her maid and dressed quickly in the
dark, her room lit only by the last remaining embers of the fire in the grate
that had been lit the night before.
 
She
had stoked the fire when she had returned to her room in the early morning
hours, but without more fuel, it had mostly gone out, leaving the room
chilled.
 

Not that Jane noticed all that
much.
 
Instead all she could feel was
the heat of Sebastian's touch, as if his hands were still caressing her body at
that very moment.
 
As her friend Amy was
so fond of saying,
if only
.
 
Then
again, Amy's "if only" had come true and, for a moment anyway, a
spark of hope ignited inside Jane's breast.

Then she looked outside and the
spark died.
 
At some point after she had
left the conservatory, where the winter moon's light had lent an almost
mystical glow to the scene, clouds heavy with snow and ice had moved in,
trapping everyone at Blackstone on the estate.

Normally, Jane did not mind.
 
In many ways, she loved the silence of the
snow-bound grounds, as it brought her a sense of peace she could not find
elsewhere.
 
Today, however, it made her
heart hurt as she would not be able to sneak away for her planned outing with
Sebastian.
 
Just before they had parted,
Sebastian had asked her to meet him just before dawn so that they might take a
brisk horseback ride together.
 
As
Blackstone boasted some of the finest stables in all of England, and as Jane
herself was a fairly good horsewoman, she had been eager for the
adventure.
 
It had been ages since she
had ridden and any excuse to spend time with Sebastian in secret was a welcome
one.

This morning's snow, however, would
not be conducive to a ride, and Jane was certain that both Lizzie and Angeline
would be busy devising activities that would be designed to keep Jane and
Sebastian apart.

Neither of the women were fools and
at this point, especially after Sebastian's defense of her the previous
evening, one or both of them surely had to suspect that feelings between the
two ran deeper than anyone imagined.
 
Angeline certainly did.

The idea of losing one of her
precious days with Sebastian hurt - far more than it probably should have - and
Jane was feeling restless.
 
She had felt
thus ever since the previous night at dinner when Rockville had intimated that
she should become his mistress.
 
And no
one, save for Sebastian and eventually her father, had seemed to mind.

Jane's mother had despised the
local baron, often reminding her daughter to stay well away from the man who
had, even from the time that Jane was a mere child, shown an unnatural interest
in a young girl who had yet to become a woman.
 
Catronia had cautioned her daughter that, perhaps, just perhaps, that
was the baron's ultimate goal - to prevent Jane from growing into womanhood and
remaining trapped at his side for a youthful mistake.

At the time, Jane had not taken the
meaning of her mother's words, even though she had studiously avoided Rockville
at all costs, but she did now.
 
There
was no question that the very moment Rockville could get her alone, he would
compromise her and attempt to force her into his bed.
 
As he was already betrothed to another woman from a neighboring
village, there was no question that marriage would not be forthcoming.
 
She would be his mistress and all of her
mother's fears would be realized.

That knowledge, combined with the
loss of her day with Sebastian, left her feeling out of sorts and before she
could change her mind, she quickly donned her warmest clothing and set out for
the stables anyway.
 
She was sure enough
in the saddle that a short ride that morning would do her good and clear her
head, allowing her to think.
 
At least
she hoped that would be the case.

"I was praying that you would
still show."

Sebastian's deep, rich voice caught
Jane unaware, and she turned to see him standing between two horses, one her
own dapple-gray mare named Selene and the other a monstrous black stallion
named Zeus.
 
No one, save for her
father, rode Zeus, yet clearly Sebastian meant to try.
 
The very idea of the obstinate horse paired
with what she suspected was an even ore obstinate rider brought a smile to her
face.

"Do I amuse you somehow, my
lady?" Sebastian asked as he led the horses towards her.
 
They were already saddled so she knew that
Horace, the head groom was probably now also in on their secret as well.
 
"Do you really think me that poor of a
horseman?"

Jane laughed, unable to help
herself.
 
"No, but I do think that
you chose the most difficult mount in my father's stables for your trusty steed
this morning."
 
She withdrew an
apple from her pocket that she had snicked from the kitchen a few moments ago
under Cook's ever-watchful eye.
 
She
offered Zeus the apple before producing another one for Selene.
 
"He is a handful at the best of times
and has never been properly broken."
 
And that, she decided, was probably an understatement.

Yet, at the moment, Zeus was calm
and, for him anyway, rather docile.
 
There was still a spark of mischief in his eyes, but no more so than in
any other horse in the stables.
 
It was
as if the magnificent stallion had taken one look at Sebastian and decided that
the human was a kindred soul.
 
Perhaps
he had.
 
No one else, save for Horace,
could lead Zeus out of the stables and not get kicked at for their efforts.

"You mean he has never been
properly ridden.
 
There is a difference,
my dear, and I think you well know it," Sebastian countered and for a
moment, Jane was transported back to the night of the musicale and how easily
she had verbally sparred with this man.
 
Suddenly, her heart lightened, as if merely being in his presence could
cheer her.
 
That was not a very
comforting thought.
 
Though she decided
it best not to examine it too closely.

When Jane said nothing, merely
looked at him with a knowing grin, he brought the horses to her.
 
"Horace and I have been having a simply
delightful chat this morning about all manner of things.
 
Including Zeus.
 
It was his idea for me to ride him, actually.
 
Says the poor fellow hasn't had a proper
exercising in years."

That much was probably true, Jane
decided as she took the hand Sebastian offered as he helped to her mount
Selene.
 
Zeus had been Angeline's folly,
a mighty horse she had chosen for her son the moment he was born - apparently
forgetting that by the time William was old enough to ride Zeus, the horse
would be well past his riding prime, if he were still alive at all.

Her father had made numerous
attempts to break Zeus over the years, but Charles Ashford was not a horse man,
no matter his title and eventually, the magnificent creature had become an
after-thought, much like Jane herself in many ways.
 
It was, she knew, why she had been the only one to ride him in
recent years, and even then, only for short periods of time.
 
He was still too spirited a creature for her
to control for long, but she did her best, and, in some way, the horse must
have recognized her efforts on his behalf for he was often far gentler with her
than would have been expected.
 
Even
Horace had remarked upon it many times.

Now, as Sebastian mounted the proud
stallion, Jane decided that finally - finally! - Zeus had found a rider worthy
of him.
 
Both man and beast looked
suited to each other and it gladdened her heart that the horse might finally
receive the attention he deserved.

As they trotted out of the stables
and into the yard, Jane was also pleased to note that once more, Sebastian kept
to the west side of the estate so that no one would see them.
 
It was unlikely that any of the houseguests
were up this early, but one could never be too careful.

They rode together in silence for a
bit until they were well clear of the house, then, Sebastian stopped and looked
back at her, giving her a rather cocky and mischievous grin.
 
"Race you to the wall," he said,
nodding in the direction of an overgrown stone wall that had once been the
foundation for the estate's small chapel.
 
Then, before she could reply, he was off, racing Zeus across the frozen
ground, the snow flying around them in little swirls, a sure horseman on his
mount.

Jane had no choice but to dig her
heels into Selene's side, sending the usually more sedate mare into a full
run.
 
She had not done this in so very
long and it felt magnificent - the wind in her hair, which had been torn free
of its confining bonnet the moment they left the stables, and the smell of
fresh snow against her face.

Catronia had loved riding and had
made certain that her daughter became an excellent rider as well.
 
Angeline referred to Jane as "passable
at best," but in her heart, Jane knew the truth.
 
She was every bit as good as a man, even hampered as she was by
riding sidesaddle.
 
Were she to ride
astride like Sebastian?
 
She felt
certain that she could probably beat him, though maybe not by much.

Together, Jane and Selene followed
the path set by Sebastian and Zeus, gaining little ground but loving the
complete freedom the wild ride offered.
 
Jane felt herself becoming one with her horse once more, and she knew
she would miss this fiercely when she was gone from Blackstone.
 
However, she pushed that thought aside and
instead concentrated on what was before her.
 
She would not wish her life away.
 
She had made that vow to herself last night when she had returned to her
room.

She would enjoy her remaining time
with Sebastian and her family.
 
She
refused to allow her mind to get away from her - though that was often easier
said that done.

By the time she pulled up next to
Sebastian - not as far behind as he had expected, at least if the expression on
his face was any indication - Jane was feeling euphoric.
 
This wasn't the way she had expected the
morning to play out but she was thankful that it had.
 
She would not trade this moment for the world.

"Horace told me you were an
excellent horsewoman," Sebastian said as Jane slowed Selene to a stop next
to Zeus.
 
"I believe he understated
your talents, my lady."
 
Then he
grinned in the way that only he could and she felt herself flush with the
praise.
 
"You are nothing short of
magnificent."
 
Then he gave her
that wicked, sinful smile, the same one he had graced her with in the garden
only a few months ago.
 
"In more
ways than one."

"Behave yourself," she
teased in return, sliding off of Selene and landing on the ground in a small
puff of snow.
 
"Else I shall have
to best you at yet another skill."
 
Then she smiled too, so that he might know she was only kidding, though
she suspected he already knew.
 
This was
Sebastian, after all.
 
He knew her
better than she knew herself, it seemed.

She startled a bit when he reached
out to take her hand after he secured the horses to an old hitching post near
where the chapel door would have been located.
 
"And I would be glad of it."
 
He tugged on her hand and they began to walk.
 
"I would be glad, if only because it would finally allow the
world to see you for the magnificent creature that you are."

Jane was about to protest, to tell
him that she was still "Plain Jane," but he pressed a finger to her
lips and she shivered at his touch.
 
"Do not argue with me on such a fine morning as this.
 
Better yet, do not lie to yourself.
 
You are a jewel among women.
 
I know we joked of it once before but you
were right.
 
You
are
a jewel and
far more precious than you can possibly know."