All's Well That Ends Well (14 page)

PAROLLES
    Ten o'clock. Within these three hours 'twill be time

enough to go home. What shall I say I have done? It must be

a very
plausive
invention that carries
it.
They begin to
smoke
²⁴

me, and disgraces have of late knocked too often at my door.

I find my tongue is too foolhardy, but my heart hath the fear

of Mars before it and of his
creatures
,
not daring the reports
²⁷

of my tongue.

FIRST LORD
    This is the first truth that e'er

thine own tongue was guilty of.

PAROLLES
    What the devil should move me to undertake the

recovery of this drum, being not ignorant of the

impossibility, and knowing I had no such purpose? I must

give myself some
hurts
³⁴
, and say I got them in exploit: yet

slight ones will not carry it. They will say, ‘Came you off with

so little?' And great ones I dare not give. Wherefore, what's

the
instance?
Tongue, I must put you into a
butter-woman's
³⁷

mouth and buy myself another
of
Bajazet's mule
³⁸
, if you

prattle me into these perils.

FIRST LORD
    Is it possible he should know what he is, and be that

he is?

PAROLLES
    I would the cutting of my garments would
serve the
⁴²

turn, or the breaking of my Spanish sword.

FIRST LORD
    We cannot
afford
⁴⁴
you so.

PAROLLES
    Or the
baring
of my beard, and to say it was
in
⁴⁵

stratagem.

FIRST LORD
    'Twould not do.

PAROLLES
    Or to drown my clothes, and say I was stripped.

FIRST LORD
    Hardly serve.

PAROLLES
    Though I swore I leaped from the window of the

citadel.
⁵¹

FIRST LORD
    How deep?

PAROLLES
    
Thirty fathom.
⁵³

FIRST LORD
    Three great oaths would scarce make that be

believed.

PAROLLES
    I would I had any drum of the enemy's. I would

swear I recovered it.

FIRST LORD
    You shall hear one anon.

PAROLLES
    A drum now of the enemy's—

FIRST LORD
    
Throca movousus, cargo, cargo, cargo
.

ALL
    
Cargo, cargo, cargo, villianda par corbo, cargo
.

PAROLLES
    O, ransom, ransom! Do not hide mine eyes.

INTERPRETER
    
Boskos thromuldo boskos
.

PAROLLES
    I know you are the
Muskos
⁶⁴
' regiment,

And I shall lose my life for want of language.

If there be here German, or Dane,
low Dutch
⁶⁶
,

Italian, or French, let him speak to me,

I'll
discover
⁶⁸
that which shall undo the Florentine.

INTERPRETER
    
Boskos vauvado
. I understand thee, and can speak

thy tongue.
Kerelybonto
. Sir,
betake thee
⁷⁰
to thy faith, for

seventeen
poniards
⁷¹
are at thy bosom.

PAROLLES
    O!

INTERPRETER
    O, pray, pray, pray!
Manka revania dulche
.

FIRST LORD
    
Oscorbidulchos volivorco
.

INTERPRETER
    The general is content to spare thee yet,

And,
hoodwinked
as thou art, will
lead thee on
⁷⁶

To
gather
⁷⁷
from thee. Haply thou mayst inform

Something to save thy life.

PAROLLES
    O, let me live,

And all the secrets of our camp I'll show,

Their force, their purposes. Nay, I'll speak that

Which you will wonder at.

INTERPRETER
    But wilt thou faithfully?

PAROLLES
    If I do not, damn me.

INTERPRETER
    
Acordo linta
.

Come on, thou art granted
space.
⁸⁶

FIRST LORD
    Go tell the Count Rossillion and my brother

We have caught the
woodcock
, and will keep him
muffled
⁸⁸

Till we do hear from them.

SECOND SOLDIER
    Captain, I will.

FIRST LORD
    
A
⁹¹
will betray us all unto ourselves:

Inform on
⁹²
that.

SECOND SOLDIER
    So I will, sir.

FIRST LORD
    Till then I'll keep him dark and safely locked.

BERTRAM
    They told me that your name was
Fontybell.
¹

DIANA
    No, my good lord, Diana.

BERTRAM
    Titled
goddess
³
,

And
worth
it, with
addition!
⁴
But, fair soul,

In your fine
frame
hath love no
quality?
⁵

If the
quick
⁶
fire of youth light not your mind,

You are no maiden, but a
monument.
⁷

When you are dead, you should be such a one

As you are now, for you are cold and stern,

And now you should be as your mother was

When your sweet self was
got.
¹¹

DIANA
    She then was
honest.
¹²

BERTRAM
    So should you be.

DIANA
    No:

My mother did but duty, such, my lord,

As you owe to your wife.

BERTRAM
    No more o'that.

I prithee do not strive against my
vows
¹⁸
:

I was compelled to her, but I love thee

By love's own sweet
constraint
²⁰
, and will forever

Do thee all
rights
²¹
of service.

DIANA
    Ay, so you serve us

Till we
serve
you, but when you have our
roses
²³
,

You
barely
leave our
thorns to prick ourselves
²⁴

And mock us with our
bareness.
²⁵

BERTRAM
    How have I sworn!

DIANA
    'Tis not the many oaths that makes the truth,

But the plain single vow that is vowed true.

What is not holy, that we swear not by,

But take the
high'st
to
³⁰
witness. Then, pray you tell me:

If I should swear by
Jove
³¹
's great attributes,

I loved you dearly, would you believe my oaths

When I did love you
ill?
This has no
holding
³³
,

To swear by him whom I
protest
³⁴
to love

That I will work against him: therefore your oaths

Are
words
and poor
conditions
but
unsealed
³⁶
,

At least in my opinion.

BERTRAM
    Change
it
³⁸
, change it.

Be not so
holy-cruel
³⁹
: love is holy,

And my integrity ne'er knew the
crafts
⁴⁰

That you do charge men with. Stand no more off,

But give thyself unto my
sick
⁴²
desires,

Who
then
recovers.
⁴³
Say thou art mine, and ever

My love as it begins shall so persèver.

DIANA
    I see that men make ropes in such a
scar
⁴⁵

That we'll forsake ourselves. Give me that ring.

BERTRAM
    I'll lend it thee, my dear, but have no power

To give it from me.

DIANA
    Will you not, my lord?

BERTRAM
    It is an
honour
⁵⁰
'longing to our house,

Bequeathèd down from many ancestors,

Which were the greatest
obloquy
⁵²
i'th'world

In me to lose.

DIANA
    Mine
honour's
such a
ring
⁵⁴
:

My chastity's the jewel of our house,

Bequeathèd down from many ancestors,

Which were the greatest obloquy i'th'world

In me to lose. Thus your own
proper
⁵⁸
wisdom

Brings in the champion honour on my part

Against your vain assault.

BERTRAM
    Here, take my ring.

My house, mine honour, yea, my life, be thine,

And I'll be
bid
⁶³
by thee.

DIANA
    When midnight comes, knock at my chamber-window:

I'll
order take
⁶⁵
my mother shall not hear.

Now will I charge you in the
band
⁶⁶
of truth,

When you have conquered my
yet maiden
⁶⁷
bed,

Remain there but an hour, nor speak to me.

My reasons are most strong and you shall know them

When back again this ring shall be delivered:

And on your finger in the night I'll put

Another ring, that what in time
proceeds
⁷²

May
token
⁷³
to the future our past deeds.

Adieu, till then. Then, fail not. You have won

A
wife
of me, though there my
hope
be done.
⁷⁵

BERTRAM
    A heaven on earth I have won by wooing thee.

DIANA
    For which live long to thank both heaven and me.

You may so in the end.

My mother told me just how he would woo,

As if she sat in's heart. She says all men

Have the
like
⁸¹
oaths. He had sworn to marry me

When his wife's dead: therefore I'll lie with him

When I am buried. Since Frenchmen are so
braid
⁸³
,

Marry
⁸⁴
that will, I live and die a maid.

Only in this
disguise
⁸⁵
I think't no sin

To
cozen
⁸⁶
him that would unjustly win.

FIRST LORD
    You have not given him his mother's letter?

SECOND LORD
    I have delivered it an hour
since
²
: there is

something in't that stings his nature, for on the reading it he

changed almost into another man.

FIRST LORD
    He has much
worthy
⁵
blame laid upon him for

shaking off so good a wife and so sweet a lady.

SECOND LORD
    Especially he hath incurred the everlasting

displeasure of the king, who had even tuned
his bounty
⁸
to

sing happiness to him. I will tell you a thing, but you shall let

it dwell
darkly
¹⁰
with you.

FIRST LORD
    When you have spoken it, 'tis dead, and I am the

grave of it.

SECOND LORD
    He hath
perverted
¹³
a young gentlewoman here in

Florence, of a most chaste renown, and this night he
fleshes
¹⁴

his
will
in the
spoil
¹⁵
of her honour. He hath given her his

monumental
ring, and thinks himself
made
¹⁶
in the unchaste

composition.
¹⁷

FIRST LORD
    Now, God
delay
our
rebellion!
As we are
ourselves
¹⁸
,

what things are we!

SECOND LORD
    
Merely
²⁰
our own traitors. And as in the common

course of all treasons, we
still
see them reveal
themselves
²¹
, till

they
attain to
their abhorred
ends
, so
he
²²
that in this action

contrives
against his own nobility, in his
proper stream
²³

o'erflows himself.

FIRST LORD
    
Is it not meant
²⁵
damnable in us, to be trumpeters of

our unlawful intents? We shall not then have his company

tonight?

SECOND LORD
    Not till after midnight, for he is
dieted to his hour.
²⁸

FIRST LORD
    That approaches
apace.
²⁹
I would gladly have him

see his
company
anatomized
³⁰
, that he might take a measure

of his own judgements, wherein so
curiously he had set this
³¹

counterfeit.

SECOND LORD
    We will not meddle with
him
till
he come, for his
³³

presence must be the whip of
the other.
³⁴

FIRST LORD
    In the meantime, what hear you of these wars?

SECOND LORD
    I hear there is an
overture
³⁶
of peace.

FIRST LORD
    Nay, I assure you, a peace concluded.

SECOND LORD
    What will Count Rossillion do then? Will he

travel
higher
³⁹
, or return again into France?

FIRST LORD
    I perceive by this
demand
, you are not altogether
of
⁴⁰

his council.

SECOND LORD
    Let it be forbid, sir! So should I be a great
deal of
⁴²

his act.

FIRST LORD
    Sir, his wife some two months since fled from his

house. Her
pretence
⁴⁵
is a pilgrimage to Saint Jaques le Grand;

which holy undertaking with most austere
sanctimony
⁴⁶
she

accomplished. And there residing, the tenderness of her

nature became as a prey to her grief; in fine, made a groan of

her last breath, and now she sings in heaven.

SECOND LORD
    How is this
justified?
⁵⁰

FIRST LORD
    The stronger part of it by her own letters, which

makes her story true, even to the point of her death. Her

death itself, which could not be her
office
⁵³
to say is come, was

faithfully confirmed by the
rector
⁵⁴
of the place.

SECOND LORD
    Hath the count all this intelligence?

FIRST LORD
    Ay, and the particular confirmations, point from

point, to the full
arming
of the
verity.
⁵⁷

SECOND LORD
    I am heartily sorry that he'll be glad of this.

FIRST LORD
    How mightily sometimes we
make us comforts of
⁵⁹

our losses!

SECOND LORD
    And how mightily some other times we drown

our gain in tears! The great dignity that his valour hath here

acquired for him shall at home be
encountered
⁶³
with a shame

as ample.

FIRST LORD
    The web of our life is of a mingled yarn, good and ill

together: our virtues would be proud if our faults whipped

them not; and our crimes would despair if they were not

cherished
⁶⁸
by our virtues.