Allison's Journey (29 page)

“I. . .I’m not sure. I want to, but I’ll have to wait and see how things go.” She sniffed. While she wouldn’t tell Aaron, she believed that once she returned home, she would never see him again.

A
s Allison stood with Aunt Mary in front of Lazy Lee’s Gas Station on Monday morning, tears welled in her eyes and mixed with the raindrops that had begun to fall. The much-needed rain they’d been praying for was finally here, and it seemed fitting that the clouds overhead would add their tears to her own. Instead of taking her homemade Amish dolls to the chiropractor’s office so the receptionist could offer them to a gift shop in Branson, Allison now waited for a bus that would take her home.

It pained her to leave Aunt Mary and her family, and it especially hurt to be going away from Aaron. It had been hard to tell him she was returning to Pennsylvania, and even more difficult to admit she didn’t know when or if she might return to Missouri. Even though she and Aaron had promised to write to each other, it wouldn’t be easy to carry on a longdistance relationship. She wished she could have offered Aaron
a guarantee that she would come back, but there were no guarantees. She didn’t know how long she would be needed at home, and if Aunt Catherine died, Papa would need someone to cook and keep house for him.

Allison could still see the forlorn look on Aaron’s face when they’d said good-bye yesterday in front of the buggy shed. She had longed to say she loved him and ask if he would wait for her, in case she was able to return to Missouri. But that wouldn’t have been fair. As much as it hurt, she would have to let Aaron go. He deserved the freedom to move on with his life and find someone else to marry.

“We’ll surely miss you,” Aunt Mary said, breaking into Allison’s thoughts. “We’ll be praying that God might offer a miracle for your daed’s sister.”

Allison nodded. “It would be wunderbaar if she was healed of her cancer, but as I’ve mentioned before, I’m more worried about healing for her soul.”

“We’ll be praying about that, too.” Aunt Mary smiled and slipped her arm around Allison’s waist. “I’ll ask God to give you the chance to witness to your aunt Catherine, just as you did with James.”

“Danki, I’m praying for that, too.” Allison glanced over her shoulder. A part of her had secretly hoped Aaron would come to see her off this morning. But maybe it was for the best that he hadn’t shown up. A tearful good-bye in front of Aunt Mary or anyone else waiting for the bus would have been too difficult.

“I appreciate your willingness to see if you can sell the dolls I’m leaving with you, and I’m also glad you gave Bessie permission to take my kitten,” Allison said, hoping the change of subject might lessen her pain. “There wouldn’t be much point in me
taking the dolls with me, and since Aunt Catherine doesn’t like pets, I couldn’t take Shadow.”

“I don’t mind keeping the dolls or your cat,” Aunt Mary replied. “But I do hope you will continue making faceless dolls when you get home.”

Allison shook her head. “I doubt there’ll be enough time for that, since I’ll have so many chores to do. Not to mention that I’ll be needed to help care for Aunt Catherine as she nears the end.”

“I understand, but if you do find any free time, sewing might be good therapy for you.”

“I’ll have to see how it goes.” Allison looked at the piece of luggage sitting at her feet. All the clothes she had brought to Missouri were inside the suitcase, but one important item was missing—the little faceless doll her mother had made for her before she died. It didn’t feel right leaving without that precious doll; yet all that remained of it was the small white kapp Aaron had found in the flower bed.

After Allison had made a thorough search of the room, she’d resigned herself to the fact that someone had indeed taken it. She had questioned everyone in Aunt Mary’s family and searched the house and barn, but the doll hadn’t turned up anywhere.

“If you ever find the faceless doll my mamm made, would you mail it to me?” Allison asked Aunt Mary.

“Of course, and I’ll ask everyone in the family to keep an eye out for it.”

The rumble of the bus pulling into the parking lot brought a fresh set of tears to Allison’s eyes. She was about to leave Webster County behind, along with so many people she had come to
love. At least she was returning home a little better equipped to run a house, and for that she felt thankful.

While Allison’s suitcase was being loaded into the baggage compartment, she turned and gave Aunt Mary a hug. “Danki for everything—especially for showing me how to find the Lord.” Her voice broke and she swallowed hard. “Come visit us sometime if you can.”

Aunt Mary nodded as tears trickled down her cheeks. “I’ll be praying that you’ll be able to come back here again, too.”

“There’s something I need to tell you,” Herman said as he took a seat on the sofa beside his sister.

“What is it?” Catherine asked, barely giving him a glance.

“I wrote Allison a letter the other day and told her about your condition.”

“Figured you would,” she mumbled. “Never could trust you to keep your word.”

Herman fought the urge to argue with her. Catherine always had to be right. He cleared his throat a couple of times. “The thing is I asked if Allison would come home.”

“You did what?” Catherine’s voice trembled, and her usually pale face turned crimson.

“Allison is needed here, and—”

“I told you I didn’t want her help.”

“I know what you said, but I also know that you can no longer keep up with things around here.”

“Write her back and tell her not to come.”

“It’s too late for that; she called me the same day she got my
letter and said she’s coming home. Fact is, she should be on the bus by now and will be here in a couple of days.”

Catherine folded her arms and stared straight ahead. “Then I guess there’s nothing more to be said.”

As Aaron guided his horse and buggy into Lazy Lee’s, he scanned the parking lot, filled with numerous mud puddles. There was no sign of Allison or her aunt out front. Had he arrived too late to say one final good-bye?

A vision of Allison’s face popped into his head. He could still see her sad expression when she’d told him she was leaving. He could still smell the aroma of peaches from her freshly shampooed hair and hear the pain in her voice as she’d murmured, “I’ll write you as often as I can.”

Aaron pulled on the reins and halted his horse near the back of the station, where a hitching rail had been erected for Amish buggies. Maybe the bus hadn’t come yet. Allison might be waiting inside, out of the rain. He jumped down from the buggy, tied the horse to the rail, and dashed into the building.

Aaron glanced around the place, noting the numerous racks of fast-food items and shelves full of oil cans, wiper blades, and other things the Englishers used on their cars. A man and a woman sat at one of the tables near the front of the store, eating sub sandwiches. But there was no sign of Allison or Mary. Could they have gone to the ladies’ room?

“Has the bus come in yet?” Aaron asked the middle-aged man behind the counter.

“Yep. Came and left again.”

“How long ago?” It was a crazy notion, but if the bus wasn’t too far ahead, Aaron thought maybe he could catch up to it along the highway.

“It’s been a good ten or fifteen minutes now,” the station attendant replied.

Aaron’s heart took a nosedive. He was too late. There was no hope of him catching the bus; it was well on its way to Springfield. He’d thought saying good-bye to Allison yesterday would be good enough, but this morning as he was getting ready for work, he’d changed his mind. With Paul’s permission, he had hitched his horse to a buggy and headed for Seymour, with the need to see Allison burning in his soul. He needed to hold her one last time and let her know how much he loved her.

“You wantin’ to buy anything?”

The question from the store clerk halted Aaron’s thoughts. “Uh. . .no. Just came in to see if the bus had come yet.”

“As I said before, you’ve missed it.”

With shoulders slumped and head down, Aaron shuffled to the front door, feeling like a heavy chunk of leather was weighing him down. Would he ever see Allison again?

I
want you to be prepared for the way things are at home,” Allison’s father said as their English neighbor drove them from the bus station to their home in his minivan.

Allison turned in her seat and faced her father. “What do you mean, Papa?” His grave expression let her know things weren’t good.

“Your aunt Catherine won’t accept any of the treatments her doctor’s suggested, and she won’t even talk about her illness.”

“Why not? Doesn’t she realize the treatments might prolong her life?”

“I think she’s afraid of the negative side effects the treatments could cause.” He pulled his fingers through the side of his hair. “To tell you the truth, I don’t think she cares about prolonging her life.”

“Oh, but—”

“This is her decision, and I’ve agreed to abide by it.” He reached for Allison’s hand. “She’s irritable and tries to do more than she can. Then she exhausts herself and ends up unable to do anything except rest for the next several days. Peter and I can fend for ourselves when it’s necessary, but we don’t have time to cook decent meals or keep the place clean. And someone needs to be at the house to take care of my sister when she’s having a bad day.”

“Maybe she will rest more with me there to do the cleaning and cooking.”

Papa nodded soberly. “That’s what I’m hoping for, and I thank you for coming.”

“You’re welcome.” Allison leaned her head against the seat and tried to relax. The days ahead would be full of trials. She could only hope she was up to the task.

“Wie geht’s?” Gabe asked as he stepped into the harness shop.

Aaron pulled his fingers through the back of his hair. “I’m doin’ okay. How about you?”

“Can’t complain.” Gabe moved toward the workbench where Aaron stood. “I came over to start working on Rufus’s dog run. It’s about time I got around to it, wouldn’t you say?”

“I suppose.”

“You don’t sound too enthused. I figured you’d be desperate to get your mutt in a dog run.”

Aaron gave a noncommittal shrug.

“You seem really
nunner
today.”

“You’d be down, too, if the woman you loved had moved
to Pennsylvania,” Aaron mumbled.

Gabe shook his head. “Allison didn’t
move
to Pennsylvania, Aaron. She lives there and had to return because her aunt is sick.”

“I know that, but she was planning to stay here—at least longer than she’d originally intended.”

“She’s only been gone a few days. I wouldn’t think you’d miss her so much already.”

“Jah, well, how would you know what I’m feeling? You’re married to the woman you love, and you know she’ll be waiting for you when you come home every night.” Aaron removed his work apron and hung it on a wall peg. It was past quitting time, and Paul had already gone up to the house. Aaron had figured he would stay and work awhile longer, hoping to keep his hands busy and his mind off the emptiness he’d felt since Allison left. Now that Gabe was here, he figured he might as well quit for the day. Truth be told, he was tired and didn’t feel like working longer, anyway.