Allison's Journey (26 page)

As Allison moved toward Aaron, his breath caught in his throat. He waited for Paul to shut the door, then held up his hands, encased in rubber gloves that were dark with stain. “Better not get too close. This stuff is hard to scrub off. Just ask my mamm; she’s had to deal with trying to get dye off my clothes, as well as my skin, ever since I was a boy and first came to work in this shop.”

“I’ll be careful.”

“What did you want to see me about?” he asked.

Allison leaned against one of their workbenches. “We haven’t had a chance to talk since the night of James’s accident. I had wanted to speak with you after the funeral dinner, but Joseph said you’d gone home with your folks.”

Aaron nodded.

She cleared her throat. “You’ve been acting kind of distant, and I’m wondering if something’s wrong.”

Aaron draped the piece of leather he’d just stained over a rung on the wooden drying rack and stood. Should he tell her what he thought about her reaction to James? Would it do any good to share his feelings?

“Are you upset about James?” Allison questioned.

He nodded. Maybe she had figured things out already.

“If you’re feeling guilty because you said unkind things about James before he died, all you need to do is confess it to God.”

Aaron’s mouth dropped open. “What?”

“You seemed so glum during the funeral service. I wondered if it was because you felt remorse and wished you could have made things right between you and James before he died.”

“I do feel bad for speaking against him,” Aaron admitted.

“It’s easy to let things slip off our tongue when we’re upset. I should know; I’ve done plenty of it in the past—especially things I said to Aunt Catherine.” Allison took a step toward Aaron, but he held up his hands.

“Stain, remember?”

“Right.” Her smile seemed to light up the room. “So the reason you didn’t say much when you took me home after the accident was because you felt bad about the way things had been between you and James?”

“Actually, I wasn’t talking much because I was upset over
you
and James.”

“Me and James?”

“Jah. The way you acted when he was thrown from his buggy made me think you had strong feelings for him.”

Allison’s mouth dropped open. “You thought that?”

He nodded. “You were determined to speak with James, and then you wanted to ride to the hospital in the ambulance with him. It made me believe—”

“I did care about James, but not in the way you think,” she interrupted.

“How was it then?”

“I cared about his soul—where he would spend eternity if he died.”

Aaron shifted from one foot to the other. Was Allison saying she had rushed to James’s side in order to speak to him about God?

“I told James he could be forgiven of his sins, and then I prayed, asking him to repeat the prayer in his mind. I believe in my heart that James understood and accepted Christ as his Savior.”

“I. . .I see.” Aaron felt as if someone had squeezed all the air out of his lungs. If Allison wasn’t in love with James, was it possible that she cared for him?

She stepped forward and touched his arm. “Are you okay? Have I said something to upset you?”

He pulled the rubber gloves off his hands and let them fall to the floor, then quickly reached for her hand. “I’ve been so dumb thinking you loved James.” He lowered his gaze. “It’s taken me a long time to deal with my feelings about my daed’s death and how it affected my mamm. I was scared of falling in love, because I was worried if I got married, I might lose my wife, the way Mom lost Dad.” He drew in a deep breath and lifted his gaze. “After talking to my mamm several weeks ago, I realized that God gave her a second chance at love with Paul and that it wouldn’t be good for me to live my life in fear of the unknown.”

“That’s true.”

“I’ve always told everyone that I’d never get married because I couldn’t find the kind of woman I needed. But the truth is I’ve been too scared.” He paused and moistened his lips. “Then you came along, and that all changed.”

Allison’s forehead wrinkled. “I. . .I’m glad you feel that way, but how can you think I’m the kind of woman you need? I can barely cook, and the things I enjoy doing most are considered men’s jobs.”

Aaron lifted her chin with his thumb. “That’s what I like about you—you’re not afraid to try some things other women might shy
away from.” He drew her into his arms, not even caring about what would happen if Paul stepped through the door. “I’m glad you came by today,” he murmured against her ear.

“Jah, me, too.”

“Catherine, you’ve got to listen to reason,” Herman said as he pulled out a chair at the kitchen table and sat beside her.

She shook her head. “There is no need to bring Allison home early.”

He held out the letter he’d recently received. “She wants to stay longer than originally planned.”

Catherine shrugged. “She can do whatever she likes.”

“But you’re going to need her help,” he argued.

“I’ll do what I can for as long as I can.” She took a sip from her cup of tea. “If I need any help, I’ll ask some of the women in our community.”

Herman was sure Sally’s mother, Dorothy, and several other women would be willing to help out, but they couldn’t be there all the time. Besides, Allison deserved to know about her aunt’s cancer, and he was sure once she heard, she would want to return home.

“Can I talk to you a minute?” Joseph asked when he stepped out of the barn and spotted his stepfather heading for the harness shop.

“Jah, sure. What’s up, son?”

Joseph hurried to his side. “I was wondering. . . .”

“You seem nervous. Is there something wrong?”

“Not wrong exactly.” Joseph cleared his throat a couple of times. “It’s just that. . .well, I know you and Aaron have been pretty busy in the harness shop lately, and I was wondering if you might need an extra pair of hands.”

“You mean
your
hands?”

Joseph nodded. “My job at Osborn’s tree farm is only parttime, and so’s the farm work I do for the neighbors.”

Papa studied Joseph intently. “Are you looking for full-time work? Is that what you’re saying?”

“Jah. I need something steady and reliable. Something I can count on all year long.”

Papa squinted as he gave his earlobe a tug. “You’ve never shown much interest in the harness shop before. You’d have a lot to learn.”

“I know.”

“Do you mind telling me why the sudden desire to work there?”

“I just told you—I need to find a full-time job.”

“And why is that, Joseph?”

“Well, I—”

“Is there a woman involved in this decision?”

“Jah. I’ve asked Katie Esh to marry me, but her folks won’t give their blessing unless I have a full-time job.”

Papa’s brows furrowed. “Is that the only reason?”

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t they have any concerns about the fact that you and Katie are only eighteen?”

“I suppose they do, but—”

“Don’t you think it would be better if you and Katie waited a few years to be married?”

“Katie and I are in love, and we want to be married as soon as possible.”

“Even if you did have a full-time job, I don’t think you’re mature enough to be a husband right now.”

Joseph’s spine went rigid. In all the years Paul had been married to Mom, he’d never made Joseph feel as small as he did right now. “I’m not immature. I’m a hard worker, and I make good decisions.”

“Do you now?” Papa gave his earlobe another quick pull. “Was it a good decision when you bought that very spirited gelding a few months ago and then it kicked one of the other horses because it has such a mean streak?”

“I had no way of knowing the horse was mean when I bought him.”

“A knowledgeable horseman would have known. Would have asked more questions before buying such a horse.”

Joseph grunted. “So you’re saying I shouldn’t marry Katie because I made one mistake when I bought a spirited horse?”

“I’m not saying that at all. I just think you need to wait a few years before you settle down to marriage and raising a family.” Papa sighed. “If you really want to work at the harness shop, I’ll have Aaron train you in his spare time, but that doesn’t mean you have my blessing to marry Katie right now.”

“Just forget it.” Joseph kicked at the stones beneath his feet. “I’ll find a job somewhere else.”

Papa put his hand on Joseph’s shoulder. “I didn’t say you couldn’t come to work for me. If you really want to work in the harness shop, then I’d like to have you here.” He smiled.
“Maybe someday, after I retire, you and Aaron can run the shop together.”

Joseph compressed his lips as he mulled things over.
If I learn the harness business and prove that I’m hard-working and reliable, maybe Papa will change his mind about me marrying Katie
. “I’ll think things over and let you know.” He hurried away before Papa could say anything more.

As Aaron walked past the front window of the harness shop, he spotted Paul talking with Joseph. His brother appeared to be quite upset. So did Paul, for that matter. Surely they couldn’t have had a disagreement. Joseph and Paul had always gotten along so well. For many years, Aaron had struggled with jealousy toward his brother because of his and Paul’s special relationship. Easygoing, happy-go-lucky Joseph had stuck to Paul like sticky tape when he’d first come to work for Mom in the harness shop. Aaron could still remember the irritation he’d felt every time he’d seen Joseph sitting beside Paul, looking up at him with adoration. And Paul had seemed equally mesmerized with Joseph. Zachary and Davey, too, for that matter. It was as if Paul had taken their father’s place right from the start. Back then, Aaron had thought Paul was buttering Joseph and Zachary up just so he could get close to Mom. He figured Paul was trying to worm his way into her heart so he could get his hands on the harness shop. But later, when Paul had taken more of an interest in Aaron and shown that he really loved Mom, Aaron had decided that Paul wasn’t after the harness shop at all.

“I brought our lunches,” Paul said when he stepped into the
shop a few minutes later.

“Danki.” Aaron took his lunch pail from Paul and placed it on the nearest workbench. “I saw you talking to Joseph outside. Is everything okay?”

Paul shrugged. “Jah, sure. Why do you ask?”

“Both of you looked kind of upset, and I wondered what was going on.”

“Joseph asked if I might consider hiring him to work here in the harness shop.”

Aaron’s mouth dropped open, and his heart raced. Did Joseph want his job? Was he hoping to get his hands on the harness shop after Paul retired?

“You look surprised.”

“I am. I mean, Joseph’s never shown much interest in the shop before. He’s usually avoided coming in here because he doesn’t care for all the strong odors.”

“I know, but some things change. People change.” Paul thumped Aaron on the back. “We’ve got a lot of work right now. I think we should give your brother a chance, and I told him you’d be the one to train him.”

Aaron’s face heated up. “Me? Why me?”

“Because he’s your brother, and I know you’ll do a good job teaching him what he needs to know.”

Aaron was getting prepared to argue the point, but the telephone rang.