Again (21 page)

After a simple fare of wild boar, quail, bread, and much ale, the floor before the high table was cleared for the entertainment.
 
The walls were lined with knights, servants, and villagers, all laughing and clapping with anticipation.
 
A troupe of performers, seeking shelter from the storm, entered the hall.  Dressed in rich, bright colors and head coverings of green, yellow, purple, and red, the troupe of men and women danced and somersaulted their way into the hall.
 
An exotic beauty, dancing seductively with swaying hips that were swathed in flowing skirts, was followed by a younger, but taller man.
 
His hands moved swiftly as he juggled four knives at once, tossing them in the air with breathtaking speed.
 
His bright yellow shirt with billowing sleeves was cut open to his navel and his muscular thighs strained the fabric of his breeches.
 
Straight ebony hair was captured at the nape of his neck, accentuating the strong line of his chin.
 
For one moment that lasted an eternity, the room and all within seemed to fade as he captured Catherine’s attention.
 
Visions of Jonathan assaulted her mind as the dark eyes of this man seemed to penetrate her thoughts.
 

Laughter, tangled with the sound of breaths being caught, broke the spell.
 

Feeling certain all in attendance were witness to her thoughts, Catherine’s eyes darted around the room, but the performers were the center of attention, not she.

Even Galen seemed thoroughly entertained.  She managed a smile for him.  The warmth of Galen’s hand upon hers only fueled the guilt coming to life within her.
 
She could no longer deny the feelings that grew within her heart, but those feelings were an obstacle she would have to overcome if she and Galen were to be together.

Suddenly too tired to pretend another minute, she bid her father good night and kissed his cheek before turning to Galen.  “Forgive me, Galen.  I grow weary.”  As he rose, she stayed him with her hand on his shoulder.  “Please, stay and enjoy the evening.  I only wish to retire.”

His smile faded as he captured her hand in his.
 
“Are you certain, Catherine?”
 

She stroked his cheek gently and nodded.
 
How could it be, she wondered, that she alone had the power both to make him smile and to take that happiness away?
 

She summoned Emelie to follow her and made her way to the door.
 
Once outside the hall, she turned to her maid.  “Draw a bath and await me in my chambers.” 

Emelie curtsied and ran towards the kitchen.

Catherine then made her way to the stairs leading to the walkways.  The stone walls were too confining tonight and the air was too stale.  She needed to breathe the air outside where she could be alone.

The storm had receded a bit, pulling away the darkest of the clouds, gifting Catherine with glimpses of the crescent moon and a handful of stars that pulsated with life.  She held her breath, listening for the sound of the ocean.  Jonathan was out there, somewhere.  He had given her a gift, one that she could not seem to share with anyone but him.  A gentle breeze caressed her cheek and brushed across her lips.  She closed her eyes to the sensation, summoning the vision of Jonathan.  Would he be thinking of her tonight?

“Catherine.”  The voice behind her was strained, the word spoken with uncertainty and perhaps a little fear.

Catherine turned to face him.
 
Galen knew, she thought.  She could hear it in his voice.  She had not fooled him.
 
His very soul lay naked before her, and her heart ached at the pleading in his eyes. 

With two steps he closed the gap between them and gathered her in his arms with the desperation of a man realizing what he loved was slipping away.
 
His strong fingers threaded through her tresses, bringing her face to his.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer, giving him what she could, taking everything that he offered.  Tonight they both could feel things were changing, and they clung to what remained for them.  Their past and future tangled together in this one kiss.  She could feel the heat in his lips, his desire to possess her, and his need to claim her for his own.
 
No, she would not deny him this kiss, for she needed him right now as much as he needed her. 

Chapter 21

Thumping on her chest with her fist didn’t relieve the ache that burrowed inside.
 
Eryn finished putting her hair in a ponytail, leaned against the balcony rail, and took a deep breath.
 
Focusing on the ocean only seemed to make it worse.
 
Eryn hardly noticed it at first, but the ache started to swell, and she couldn’t ignore it anymore.

She sat down.  Maybe it was time she faced it.  This wasn’t happily ever after.  The emptiness shot like a bolt through her chest. 
No
.
 
She shook her head. 
We’re supposed to be together.
 
We’ve hung in there all these years for a reason, didn’t we?
 

She leaned back and thought hard about the possibility of leaving Bryce.
 
No, she couldn’t quit!
 
He needed her.

But what was it she read about the unresolved issues from past lives?
 
We all have dominant traits that we need to overcome and if we don’t overcome them, we carry them over to the next life.
 
What were her unresolved issues?
 
For one thing, she was forgiving to a fault.
 
She tended to be everyone’s doormat, trying to keep everyone happy.
 

Oh, damn!
 
She needed to get out of here and the beach was the best place to connect with her past.
 
Maybe she would come up with answers there.
 

Ever since dinner with Troy, Bryce has been watching suspiciously.
 
He was even resorting to going to work later these days, and sometimes he worked at home instead of going to the office, just so he could keep an eye on her.

She closed the doors to the balcony and made her way to the back of her closet.
 
Grabbing her shorts, she hurried to pull them on.
 
She lost her balance, catching her foot in the shorts, and slammed her shoulder right on the edge of the closet door, sending a sharp pain through her back.
 
“Damn!”
 
Recovering her balance, she winced as rolled her shoulders to loosen them up.

Her cell phone chimed the arrival of a text message.
 
Hurrying out of the closet and sweeping the phone off the dresser, she glared at it and spat out, “Shit.”
 
It was Troy again, demanding she call him.
 
What part of my message didn’t you get, Troy?
 

The aroma of fresh ground coffee drifting up the stairs should have had enticed her, but instead it hovered like some sort of warning.
 

“Why is he still here?” she grumbled.
 
A glance at her watch told her Bryce wasn’t going in to work.
 

Maybe she could sneak out and avoid having to explain herself to Bryce – again.
 
Pulling her sweatshirt on and grabbing her shoes, she hurried towards the stairs, pausing at the top.
  
There was no way she could sneak out.
 
It would be too obvious.
 
She’d have to pass right by the kitchen.
 
She groaned.
 
The sound of coffee cups clinking together could only mean he was in the kitchen.
 
She crept down the stairs, holding her breath.
 
Maybe he would take his coffee and go into his office and get busy.
 
Then she could just run out the door and wave on the way out.
 
Maybe this morning would be different.
 
Maybe today she wouldn’t feel the guilt or the resentment.
 

“Eryn?” he said, coming out of the kitchen.
 

She took a deep breath.
 
“Mmm, smells great!”
 
Her forced smile made her cheeks ache as she made her way down the stairs.
 
She tucked her shoes under her arm and reached for the steaming cup, ignoring the scrutinizing look he gave her.
 
She slid past him into the kitchen to place her cup on the counter before putting on her shoes.
  

Bryce’s cup slammed onto the countertop with a little more force than was necessary, his agitation clearly showing.
 
“Going to the beach…again?”

“What do you mean?
 
I always go running,” she said, not looking up.

“It seems you’re getting more out of it than exercise.”

It amazed her how quickly he could go from cold to glacial.
 
His gray eyes were like shards of ice now.
 
She stiffened at his accusing gaze.

“What exactly is that supposed to mean?”

“I think you know.”

She rolled her eyes.
 
Whatever his issue, it would have to wait.
 
She just wasn’t in the mood and suddenly the house was feeling too small.
 
Pulling tight on her shoelaces, she took a few sips of her coffee and headed out the door.

Outside, the morning was clear, the air heavy with the tang of saltiness.
 
She made her way to her car parked outside the garage, patting her pockets in search of her keys.
 
The sound of jingling stopped her short.
 
How could I be so stupid?
  
Pressing her lips together, she forced a smile before turning around to face Bryce.

“Can’t get far without those.”
 
She mustered a small laugh.
 
“Here, toss ‘em.”

“Come and get them,” he tempted, holding them out.
 
His smile never reached his eyes.

“I could just run down to the beach,” she countered.

“You could, but if I leave, you’d be locked out of the house.”
 
He leaned against the door jam in satisfaction, one eyebrow raised.

The tension in her neck started to throb, renewing the pain in her shoulder.
 
Okay, she thought, two can play this game.
 
Taking a deep breath and letting it out loudly, she feigned defeat.
 
She tried to keep her steps light when she went to him.

He hid the keys behind his back when she reached for them.
 
“Come inside with me.”
 
His gaze burned hot and promising.

“After my run,” she said.

His eyes glinted steel when he spoke.
 
“Who are you meeting every morning, Eryn?”

She blinked in surprise, and couldn’t stop the laugh.
 
“Meeting? Are you kidding?”
 
He couldn’t further from the truth – or closer to the truth.
 

She sighed.
 
“I’m not meeting anybody.”
 
Was dreaming about a man from another life the same as meeting someone?
 
“Since when is it a crime to exercise?”
 
She put out her hand.
 
“Come on, I won’t be long.”

He shrugged his shoulder away from the door and tossed her the keys, his eyes never leaving hers.
 
He turned and went inside without saying a word.

She backed up a few steps before she turned on her heel.
 
Damn him!

Inside the car, she didn’t look at the house.
 
She hit the steering wheel with her palm, torn up with guilt.

But the beach was calling to her.
 
“I know, I know.
 
I want to go,” she whispered.
 
Pulling out of the driveway, she chanced a look at the bedroom window.
 
Her eyes locked with Bryce’s for a split second, then he was gone.

She sped down the street, feeling like she was pulling the thread that was slowly unraveling their marriage.
 
But she was compelled to go, to somehow connect with this man with whom she shared a life with centuries ago.
 
Jonathan.
 
A twin flame.
 
The other half of my soul.
 
The ultimate union.
 
What lesson did she have to learn to get to him?

The parking lot was empty.
 
The off-shore breeze blew past unobstructed, freely sweeping the sand into random piles.
 
Seagulls hovered, wings frozen in mid-flight, balancing on the wind.
 

With her hand poised over the keys, she couldn’t bring herself to turn off the engine. “I should go back.”
 
She shook her head at her own words.
 
“No!
 
I can’t be responsible for his happiness.
 
I have to take care of me!”
 
She leaned her head back on the headrest and closed her eyes as her mind and her heart warred.