A Stray Drop of Blood (55 page)

“
It is not what you think, Mistress.” Phillip stepped forward, hand up in a calming gesture. “Caelia knows you and Titus are not lovers, and she has threatened to tell Caius of your deception unless Titus takes her back.”

Her gaze stayed on Titus all through Phillip’s short speech. “And you think the answer to this problem is doing as she demands? You would give up all you have worked for, you would open yourself to sin again just because she bids it?”

“
Yes!” Titus practically roared. “To save you, Abigail, I would do anything. I will
not
let my father have his way with you.”

Abigail regarded him cooly. “If your father forced himself upon me, it would be his sin, not mine. It would be painful, but the world would not come to an end. If you took Caelia, the sin would be upon
your
head, my friend.”

He threw up his hands and spun away. “She would kill you. And you would speak to me of
sin
?”

“
I love you!” Abigail cried in return. “Would you have me stand aside while you sacrifice yourself for me? While you give yourself to another? Am I to believe that when you are in her arms you would find no pleasure there? I have been there, Titus. Even knowing it is wrong, even trying to keep yourself pure of sin in such a situation, it is impossible. And you would put yourself into it willingly, so how could you even
hope
to stay free of sin? And once in its clutches, how will your motives remain untainted?”

Titus’s jaw clenched in anger. “What would you have me do? Let the old lecher ravish you?”

“
I would have you find a better answer.”

“
How?” He paced again, but the bitterness still caught him, swamped him. “Shall I pray, Abigail? What good will it do? I have been praying, seeking God earnestly for months, and I am rewarded with
this
.”

“
Titus.” Her rebuke was so soft that he had no choice but to halt if he wanted to hear her. “Will you lose faith at the first obstacle? Our Lord has not abandoned us. This is surely not as big a problem as it seems to us in this moment.”

Titus sighed, his shoulders slumping in defeat. “If this is a test, I know not how to pass it, my love. You are in my care, and you hold my heart. I cannot see you hurt. I would sooner condemn myself than see you in pain.”

“
Do not say that.” She moved to him, wrapped her arms around his waist, and pressed her cheek against his chest. “Please, beloved. More than your protection, I need your faith. It is God who brought us together, and through serving him that we have grown so close. If you give up on him, why should he not give up on us?”

He sighed and held her close. “I will not give up. Forgive my doubt. I spoke in passion, but it is not truly my heart. I
will
pray and await an answer. I will not take this upon myself.”

He kissed her, kissed her again. “Just please do not dismiss this, Abigail. It is a serious threat.”

She nodded, snuggled against him. But it did nothing to quiet the worry inside him.

~*~

Aquilia picked up the cup of warm drink from the table before her and leaned back, surveying the two silent men with whom she dined. They would be off to the Forum soon, she knew, doing whatever it was men did all day. She took a sip of the brew, wondering if she should try to be tactful or not. Deciding it would be far more entertaining to see her husband’s irritation at her question, she turned to her son. “Is Abigail not joining us this morning, Titus?”

Titus’s head jerked up, his eyes narrowed a moment before he regained himself. “No. She did not sleep well last night. She had only just fallen into a sound slumber when I left. I already asked Antonia to make sure a tray was sent up for her a little later.”

Aquilia was tempted to smile at the annoyance that flickered over Caius’s face at Titus’s casual intimacy with the Hebrewess. “I hope she is not unwell. I was considering visiting with her a bit this morning.”

Titus put down his knife and stared at her. “I . . . know she would appreciate that.”

“
Excellent.” Aquilia motioned one of her maids over to her. “Go help Antonia with the children. And when Abigail is awake and up for company, come fetch me.”

The girl hurried away, and Aquilia smiled into her husband’s scowl before looking to Titus again. “Have you heard anything more from the Visibullises?”

“
No. I am not certain we should expect to hear from them again before they arrive, either. But I begin to expect their arrival any day now.”

“
Good,” Caius pronounced. “The sooner that harlot leaves my house, the better.”

“
You may speak of your own women that way, Father,” Titus said calmly, “but I will thank you not to attach such names to mine.”

“
I have watched her with the children.” Aquilia studied her son, hoping his father would not see in his eyes what she could see so clearly. “She is a wonderful mother. Caring and patient, but firm. She will raise Benjamin to do honor to Jason’s memory.”

Caius made his usual grimace. “If she wishes to honor her husband’s memory, she should leave the boy in Rome with a guardian. You would do well, Titus, I see how you fawn over the babe.”

Titus rolled his eyes. “Abigail would not leave her son. Nor would she consent to staying in Rome. Therefore Benjamin will return to Israel with her until he comes of age to decide for himself if he wishes to return to his father’s country. And at that time, if he does wish to come back here, I will certainly step in and offer him my benefaction.” He stood up. “If you will excuse me, Mother, I would like to say goodbye to my guests before I leave.”

Aquilia nodded her assent, smiling into her cup as her son stalked away. Caius was practically steaming.

Her husband focused his foul humors on her. “What was that all about? I thought you only wanted her out of here.”

Aquilia was not about to tell him her real reasoning. “And soon enough she will be. I would rather not have it said that I had a guest in my house for so long without showing her any kindness.”

“
She is not our guest.”

Aquilia smirked and stood. “She is not yours, perhaps, but she is our son’s. It will not injure you if I have an hour’s conversation with the Jewess.” She waved a hand at him as she headed for the door. “Go play in your politics and your intrigues and your business, Caius. Do not concern yourself with me.”

She left the room before she could hear his response, and though she did not rush to her quarters, she also did not linger near him. She had a few household tasks to see to this morning, and she figured that by the time she was done them, Abigail would be up and ready to see her.

Her prediction proved to be the case; she had no sooner sat down to her embroidery after seeing to her duties than her maid came in to inform her that the young mother had sent her to say she was welcome to join her at her convenience. Aquilia nodded and put down her needle, rose from her chaise, and headed for her son’s rooms.

The door to Titus’s room was open. Abigail sat at the small table finishing off a glass of juice. Samuel was entertaining the baby, Antonia keeping a watchful eye over them both. In the corner stood the eunuch they had bought, looking formidable and impenetrable.

Abigail smiled when she noticed Aquilia and stood. “Good morning. I am so glad you stopped in.”

Aquilia smiled. “I should have done so long ago. Forgive my negligence.” She turned her smile on Samuel, who had scurried over to her. “Hello, Samuel. How are you today?”

“
Well. Look, my tooth is beginning to grow back in, and now another is loose!”

Aquilia laughed even as she bent down for a closer look. “Why, so it is. Pretty soon you will be as toothless as an old man.”

Samuel laughed in delight as Aquilia turned to Antonia. “Maita is going to the markets; she suggested you might like to join her and bring the boy.”

Samuel bounced up and down and looked over at Abigail. “May I go, Mother? May I, please?”

Abigail smiled. “If Antonia wants to go.”

“
I would love to.” She reached out for Samuel’s hand. “Come, my boy, we shall go get ready and leave the ladies to talk in peace. Kiss your mother goodbye.”

Samuel did as he was bidden, hurriedly, and ran from the room with Antonia on his heels. Abigail watched him with a smile and shake of her head. When they were gone, she looked back up at Aquilia. “Please, sit down.”

They both did so, and once they were seated Aquilia wasted no more time. “My son is in love with you.”

Abigail just looked at her for a moment, then drew in a long breath. “Yes. And I am in love with him. But you need not worry about what that will mean. We both know it can go nowhere, and we have no plans for changing that. I will return to Israel with my mother, and he will stay here and look for a suitable wife.”

Aquilia leaned forward. “I was not afraid that he would follow Jason’s lead and marry you. I am more concerned about what will happen if Caius realizes Titus is so attached to you. My husband hates you as much as he desires you, Abigail. He was very fond of Jason. When we received the news of his decision to marry you, Caius was enraged. He had entertained high hopes for him and saw you as his downfall. Up until then he had been fully prepared to pull the same strings for Jason as he had for Titus, getting him out of the military and back to Rome.”

Abigail’s shoulders rolled back. “Yes, Jason spoke highly of him. Although I am sorry to say I have yet to see the generosity my husband mentioned.”

Aquilia breathed a laugh. “Surely you did not expect it, Abigail. You were a slave. Jason married you only because of the babe. We cannot forget that as quickly as the Visibullises.”

She inclined her head. “I did not expect it. Having met Titus a year ago, having seen the cold man he was, I knew his family could not be much different. If your son warmed up to me, it was only because of the situation we found ourselves in. Mourning Jason, watching his murderer be released. He had promised my husband he would see I was taken care of, and he did that. He is still doing that. If Jason had not made him swear to it, I have no doubt Titus would have been content to forget that I existed.”

Aquilia lifted a brow. “Perhaps he would have. But he does not care for you now simply because of a promise to Jason. Indeed, I would say Jason has very little to do with the things he feels for you. The question now, Abigail, is what really happened to my son as he mourned for Jason, watched his murderer be released? He is not the same man who left here, who wrote us, who you yourself just mentioned. This new Titus is far from the cold man you said you met a year ago. What happened to him?”

Abigail drew in a long breath, obviously considering. “Much happened that day when Barabbas was released, Aquilia. We both watched an innocent man hang in that murderer’s place, a man who was nothing but a teacher who had offended the officials. We heard that same man, unjustly put to death, forgive those who did it to him. Can you imagine how small that makes you feel? Lusting for revenge, and hearing a dying man forgive his tormenters?” She shook her head at the memory. “The very earth shook at the crime. Most of the crowd fled, but I could not. My labor pains began. Titus saw me, came and helped me up. He took me home, but no one was there. They had moved Ester away, and I knew not where they had taken her. He stayed with me because he was afraid of failing Jason, afraid I would die if he did not get help. He stayed by my side the whole time, the following days, and we talked of all that had happened. The midwife had been a follower of this teacher who had been crucified, and she taught us his lessons. They made sense to us, so we decided together to live by them.”

She shrugged, as if anything could be so simple. “The changes your son has made he made because he chose to be different. He chose to put aside his bitterness. It really has very little to do with me.”

Aquilia measured her silently for only a moment. “Perhaps. Perhaps he will remain as he is now once you leave. Perhaps he will revert back to the man he used to be. Either way, I was not certain you realized how different he truly is now. He is smiling, laughing, seemingly taking joy from life. Before he lived only for pleasure, but it never brought him contentment. He has never treated anyone with the respect he shows you. Which brings me back to my initial concern. It is only a matter of time before Caius picks up on this. Be careful, Abigail, and advise Titus to do the same. If he keeps looking at you so warmly in his father’s presence, he will bring an explosion down on his own head.”

Abigail shook her head. “If Caelia does not beat him to it.”

“
What?” Aquilia’s spine snapped into alignment. “What does that wench have to do with anything?”

Abigail briefly explained what had passed between Caelia and Phillip the day before. Aquilia’s brows drew together. “I had not realized he had refused her, or any of the others for that matter. Will you try to tell me you have nothing to do with
this
, either?”

Abigail sighed. “It is part of the teachings of that man I spoke to you about that one should refrain from sexual relations until one is wed. Titus has been honoring that of his own accord. Although I will admit that last night, when he entertained the notion of accepting Caelia in order to silence her, I did not take well to the idea.”