A House Without Windows (15 page)

“The front door wasn’t locked.”  Beth whispered and looked around.

“Nobody locks their doors around here.  There’s no need to.”  Liam placed Amy carefully on one of the bunk beds and took off her socks and shoes:

“Don’t wake her up, I’ll sort through the cases tomorrow and find her pyjamas.”  Beth covered her daughter up, noticing the attractive bedspread.

“Mom made the quilt when I was born.  Every stitch was sewn with love.”  Liam whispered and smiled.

“I can’t wait to meet her again.”  Beth smiled back as she placed the baby in his cot.  “I need to make up some bottles for Joss now in case he wakes up in the night.”

“Everything you’ll need will be in the kitc
hen.  Mom knows about these things.”

Beth made her way back to the kitchen, approving of the welcoming feel of the cottage.  Scores of old family photographs hung upon the walls of the main living area, which had obviously been set up to accommodate many branches of the family all at the same time.  Liam as a moody toddler stared out at her from the wall adjacent to the back door which led out to the sun deck.  Comfortable sofas and armchairs surrounded a low central table.  The log burner gave out a pleasing heat, and children’s toys were scattered about in large baskets.  A bookshelf of well-thumbed novels stood in one corner behind the TV.

“Oh Liam it’s such a lovely cottage.  I’m going to love it here.”

“And I love you, baby.”  He put his arms around her and laid his cheek against the top of her warm head.

“I love you so much.  I’ll make up the bottles and then have a nice hot bath.”

“Ah.  No bath I’m afraid; only a shower. We Canadians like showers.”

“Ok.  A nice hot shower then!”  She kissed him and put the kettle on to boil.

CHAPTER 40

Refreshed and glowing and wrapped in a towel, Beth rooted around in the suitcase for her night clothes.  She smiled as she heard Liam singing in the shower.  She could hardly believe that only a few months had passed since being freed from Evans’ grip. 

By the time Liam had come out of the shower Beth had made herself comfortable on the sofa in front of the log burner.  Her eyes felt heavy:

“Room for another one on there?”  He sat down by her side wearing a clean t-shirt and jogging trousers, and smelling of a mixture of shower gel and toothpaste.

“Absolutely.  I think I’m in heaven, but I don’t remember dying.”  She smiled as she cuddled up to him.

“And you haven’t.  You’ve got a lot of living to do first.”  He kissed her lips and she buried her head in his shoulder.

“
Liam, I think I ought to get something out in the open straight away.  I don’t know if I’m ready for a physical relationship again yet.  I hope you understand.”  She breathed a sigh of relief at getting the worry off her chest.

“Of course, darling, you’ve been through a lot.  If you want to sleep alone there are plenty of beds here.  I totally understand.”  He held her tighter and she relaxed in his arms.

“I’m so sorry.  It’s just that…………”  She broke off, unable to go on any further.

“I know.  I have a pretty good idea of what he did to you.
If I ever hear that he’s got out of jail he’d better keep looking over his shoulder. We’ll just take it one day at a time.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be.  I don’t want to hear another word about it.  Just keep cuddling me.”

“I can do that.  I don’t want to sleep alone though
like I have to do at Mum and Dad’s; I’m so used to Amy in the bed with me.  Is it fair to ask you?”

“Well, there’s nobody else about
and Amy’s asleep, so I guess it’ll have to be me then.”  They snuggled nearer, enjoying the closeness.

“We used to sleep naked.  Do you remember?”  She sighed and listened to the clock ticking on the wall.

“How could I forget?  We used to lay together like two spoons.” He tried unsuccessfully to block the memory.”

“I can’t do it again just yet.”

“Will you behave yourself?  I told you, I don’t want to hear another word.”

She lifted her head and kissed his neck:

“Can you stroke my hair like you used to?”  She closed her eyes and smelt the warmth of him.

“Sure can.  I’m good at stroking, but there’s not much hair to play with these days.” He took a small piece of the blonde hair between his fingers and twirled it around.

“I couldn’t bear it any longer.  The way he looked at it and touched it; I used to cringe inside.  If he’
d ever given me a knife or a pair of scissors I would have cut it off myself.”

“I’
ll never do anything to you that you don’t want me to.”  He kissed her hair and felt tears forming in his eyes.  He blinked them away.

“Will I ever be able to get over this?”  She looked up at him and his heart gave a lurch.

“With time, darling.  I’ll help as much as I can.  I’ll be your counsellor. Soon the good times will outweigh the bad.”

She gazed into the fire:

“What about your little boy?  Will Patty let you see him?”

“She wouldn’t at first, but then she told me he kept asking for his daddy and she’s relented.  I’ve only seen him a few times in the last couple of months though, but she’s thawing out a bit now I think.  It’ll get better in the long run.”

“I’m so glad. 
He’ll need his daddy as he grows up.  Where are they living now?”

“With her mother.  I’m as good as dead
though as far as Cathy’s concerned.  I’ve given Patty money for a new place.”

“Of course. So you’ve kept the old place in Toronto?”

“Yes.  It’s turned into a bachelor pad now.  It needs a woman’s touch again.”

“Will I see it before I go back?”

“Sure.  It’s not too far from the airport.”

He ruffled her hair:

“Come on; time for bed.  I want to be your spoon.”

With Liam’s warmth against her back, she knew no more until daybreak
.

CHAPTER 41

The sound of a baby’s cries broke through her dreamless sleep:

“Mummy!  Where are you? Joss is hungry!”  Amy’s worried voice at finding herself in unfamiliar surroundings brought Beth suddenly back to reality.  She felt Liam’s arm tighten around her waist as she began to climb out of bed:

“Let’s stay here all day.”  He yawned and chuckled.

“Oh yes, that’ll work well with our two little people.”  She gently removed his arm, swung her legs over the side of the bed, and rooted around for her slippers.

“Just kidding.  Let’s get up and at ‘em!”

“I’m in here darling!”  She smiled as the bedroom door flew open and Amy appeared.

“I looked out of the window, and all I can see is water!  Is that the sea like Philip and Jack sailed on in Bill Smugs’ boat?”

“It’s Lake Huron, Amy.  When we’ve had breakfast we’ll wrap up warmly and go down onto the beach.  You won’t want to swim in it though, it’s very cold at this time of the year.”  Liam wrapped a dressing gown around him and followed Amy and Beth out to the kitchen.

“I can’t swim yet anyway.  Mummy, can I pick Joss up out of his cot?”

“Yes of course.  I’ll warm up his bottle.” 

She placed
a bottle of formula milk into the microwave.  Liam came up behind her and put his arms around her waist:

“Love you so much, honey.  I’m so glad you’re here.”  He kissed the top of her head.

“Me too.  It’s a dream come true.  I used to think about you every day and wonder what you were doing.”

“Mummy, Joss has done a poo!”  Amy entered the kitchen, wrinkled her nose, and handed the baby to her mother.

“Babies do tend to do that Amy.  Tell you wha
t; I’ll change his diaper and Mommy will fix you some cereal, eh?”  Liam laughed as Beth handed Joss to him.

“Can I sleep in your bed tonight like I used to in the house with no windows?”  Amy carefully poured cereal into a bowl.

“Well, Daddy sleeps with me now darling.  You have your own bed here like you do at Nanny and Grandpa’s house.”

“Why does Daddy sleep in your bed and I can’t?” 

“You slept in my bed because there was nowhere else for you to sleep and there was no room to put another bed down.  Children usually sleep in their own bedrooms in houses that have windows.  This house has windows, and Nanny and Grandpa’s house has windows.”  Beth shook the bottle of baby milk and hoped she’d given a good enough explanation.

“Why doesn’t Daddy have his own bedroom here?”  Amy was not going to be put off so easily.

“Daddy is not a child.  You and Joss have your own rooms and Daddy and I share now.  It’s what grown-ups do.”  Beth gave a sigh of irritation as she waited for the next question. 

“So can I sleep in your bed when I’m grown up then?”

Beth smiled at the childlike logic and gave in:

“Yes; when you’re grown up, but only if you still want to.”

She sat down in the peace and quiet of the main living area and fed her son with the sound of the lake lapping against the shore in the background.  She looked down at the baby, and two soulful brown eyes stared back.  What wisps of hair he did have on his head were dark.

He had his father’s eyes.  She would never forget those eyes for as long as she lived.

She turned to look out towards the lake, and tried to ignore the tears that were blurring her vision. 

Joss was her saviour.  He’d released her from a hell on earth.  Why was she suddenly thinking about Evans?  She had Liam back now.  All was well.

“Some coffee here for you, darling.”  Liam placed a steaming cup on the table in front of her.

“Thanks.  I’m nearly done now.”

“Amy’s getting dressed.  She wants to go down on the beach.”

“
Yes; give me another half an hour and I’m there.”

Warmly dressed against the March elements and carefully holding the baby, she followed Liam and Amy out of the back door, across the decking, and down a wooden flight of stairs.  Standing on the sand close to Liam with the chilly wind on her face, she watched her daughter run happily along the vast expanse of empty beach.

“This is a dream come true for her, and for me.  You’ve no idea.”  She cuddled her son closer, pulling a blanket in around him. 

“It’s quite a bit warmer in the summer, but there’ll be more people around.”

“I’ll bring a bikini next time then.”

“I’ll look forward to that.”  He kissed her and waved to Amy. “Mom
and Harry will be here soon. They’re probably on their way now.”

CHAPTER 42

“Beth, it’s so good to see you again!”  Constance Ayres kissed the woman whom her son obviously adored, and whom she wished could have become her daughter in law.

“Connie!  We meet again at last!  This is your granddaughter Amy.”

“Hello.”  Amy shyly came forward to meet her grandmother.

“My, my!  What a pretty child!
She has the look of Liam about her.”

“Yes I know.  The older she gets the more she’s looking just like him.”

Beth turned her gaze to a tall, elegant, quiet middle-aged man keeping himself in the background as Connie made the introductions.

“Beth, this is Harry.  We’ve been married a few years now.”

“Hi, Beth!  Pleased to meet you!”  Harry kissed her and solemnly shook Amy’s hand. “That’s a fine little brother you have there
, Amy!” 

“He’s called Joss, after Philip’s uncle.”

“Who’s Philip?”

“He’s in my
old book, but I don’t read it now.  I used to read it when I slept with Mummy in the house with no windows.  Daddy sleeps with Mummy now because they’re grown-ups, and I have a new book that Daddy bought me.”

“I see.”  Harry looked slightly puzzled.

“Shall we go into Kincardine?  The market’s on this morning.”  Connie saw the look of embarrassment briefly fall across her son’s face, and decided
to change the subject.

“Sure.  I’ll just put a clean nappy on Joss and then we’ll be ready.” Beth reminded herself to have a little word with her daughter in private regarding their sleeping arrangements.

“Lunch out; our treat!”   Connie took Amy’s hand.