A Good Man (35 page)

Yeah, John thought. Why can’t I just go out with you without the challenge?

“The point of the challenges is education, Graham,” Sonya said. “I am learning about each of these men. They have all tried their hardest. Yes, Arthur burned the sheets. But what woman on earth would be angry if a man set her sheets on fire?”

Did she mean to say that? John thought. I don’t think she did.

“I mean,” Sonya continued, “a woman could always use another set of new sheets, right? And if she gets new sheets …” Sonya turned to Shani.

“Then she’d have to get a new comforter,” Shani said. “And new pillows …”

“New drapes, new carpet …” Sonya smiled.

Then Shani actually smiled. “New blankets, new furniture, a whole new bed.”

Sonya looked directly at John. “Arthur is just a bedroom makeover waiting to happen.”

Nice save, Sonya, John thought. What does a bedroom makeover cost? It must be expensive.

After the lights dimmed and winked out, Bob and Larry approached Sonya, Bob with his usual anger and Larry with the all-important online information on his BlackBerry.

“You are bound and determined to change all the rules, aren’t you?” Bob asked. “You were supposed to dump either Gary or Arthur, but, no, you can’t make up your mind! You’re destroying the integrity of the show!”

“You told me to keep them for a few weeks, Bob,” Sonya said. “So I’ve kept them all for another week. And I did make up my mind, Bob. I decided to keep them both.”

“I never said …” Bob blinked. “Oh, I did, didn’t I?”

“I’m glad you did, Bob,” Larry said. “Online, a full ninety percent think you did the right thing, Jazz.” He looked at his BlackBerry. “Listen to these comments. ‘Like, Jazz is my hero,’ and ‘You can’t rush love’ and ‘I hope she keeps ’em all till summer’ and ‘She made the only reasonable choice she could make’ and ‘I couldn’t decide either.’” Larry shrugged. “You’re a hit because you didn’t make a choice.”

“But I did make a choice,” Sonya said. “I chose to keep them all.” She smiled down at Bob. “Anything else, Bob?”

Bob shook his head and disappeared into the garage.

“How are the numbers, Larry?” Kim asked.

“We’re really no match for the NFL playoffs this week,” Larry said, “but I’m almost positive we’ll be a close second.” Larry laughed. “‘What woman on earth would be angry if a man set her sheets on fire?’ Classic stuff! Keep it up.” Larry, too, went into the garage.

“Classic stuff,” John whispered, “from a classic lady.”

Sonya drew him to the pool area. “You think maybe I said something I shouldn’t have said?”

“I’d like to set fire to your sheets,” John said. Whoa. And now I’ve said something I shouldn’t have said. “I mean, um, I’d like the opportunity to …” Wrong direction.

Sonya put her hand on his face. “I’ll bet you could do it, too.”

“I’m a bit out of practice …” And now I’m saying more things I shouldn’t say. What is this woman doing to me? No. What am I allowing this woman to do to me?

“You any good with babies?” Sonya asked.

John looked around for anyone within earshot. “From burning sheets to babies, Sonya? It is a logical progression, you know, burning up the sheets and making a baby, but …”

“I hope you’re good with babies, John,” Sonya said, “because the next challenge involves babies.”

“Whose idea was this?” Ah, the evil sister strikes. “Shani’s?”

“Mine.” She bit her lower lip. “I want to know that, um, my man can do his part should I one day have a child.”

“And you’re, um, actually planning to have a child?” John asked.

“Two, actually,” Sonya said. “A boy and a girl.”

My elbows are sweating. Why are my elbows sweating? “And who’s the lucky father?”

“Win the challenge,” Sonya said, “and I’ll let you know.”

I have to win this next challenge.

The producers asked Graham to take a few days off, and Graham was only too glad to oblige them. Darius assembled the Team in the great room Tuesday morning.

“I have created a unique challenge, guys,” Sonya said, “and it’s going to be fun.”

“Y’all are going to be shopping at Costco today to properly equip a baby bag for an infant,” Shani said.

Equipping a baby bag, John thought. That doesn’t sound too hard to do.

“Your bag must be adequately filled to last for an eight-hour outing,” Sonya said.

“You’re not allowed to ask for help at Costco or go online to look at lists,” Shani said. “You’re completely on your own.”

An eight-hour outing, huh? Babies sleep half the time, don’t they? Good babies do. I will have a good baby. So I really only have to prepare for four hours of awake time. Three, no, four diapers ought to do it. Let’s see … I’ll need wipes, a burp cloth or whatever they call it, a baby bottle, a rattle, and a pacifier. Done.

Piece of cake.

Later, each member of the Team unpacked his bag in front of Shani and Sonya.

Justin unpacked first. “I put in a full package of diapers and two packs of wipes, cuz my baby gonna like to eat.” He pulled out a huge blanket. “My baby also gonna be big.” He waved a stuffed rhinoceros in the air. “For entertainment.” He took out a bottle, pacifier, several candy bars, and two cans of Red Bull.

“What are the candy bars for?” Shani asked.

“Me,” Justin said. “For when the baby’s asleep.”

“And the Red Bull?” Sonya asked.

“Babies take the energy out of you, right?” Justin said. “I’m just putting some energy back.”

Tony displayed a full package of diapers, one package of wipes, a change of clothes but no socks, and a bottle.

“You have a lot missing there, man,” Shani said. “Good idea on the clothes, but no socks? Baby’s feet gonna get cold.”

“It’ll be a hot day,” Tony said.

“And no pacifier?” Sonya asked.

“I heard they can mess up a baby’s teeth,” Tony said.

“This is an infant, Tony,” Shani said. “They have no teeth.”

“I know that,” Tony said, “so when the baby does have teeth, they won’t be messed up.”

John’s diaper bag contained four diapers, a package of wipes, a burp cloth, a baby bottle, a rattle, and a pacifier.

“Four diapers?” Shani said with a laugh. “Are you kidding?” John smiled. “My baby likes to sleep. A lot.”

“One pacifier?” Sonya said. “What if he drops it?”

Oops. “Um, she won’t drop it because she’s going to be a future athlete, and if she does drop it, I’ll wash it off.”

“No change of clothes?” Shani said. “No blanket?”

Yeah, I screwed up there. “Um, we live in the desert, and we have a swimming pool.”

Shani shook her head. “Then where’s your sunblock?”

Shoot! “We’ll, um, we’ll sit in the shade of our, um, our cactuses.” Cacti?

Sonya sighed.

I have just lost another challenge.

“Let’s see what Gary has,” Shani said.

Gary counted out ten diapers. “One for each hour and two extra just in case.”

I didn’t know there was any math involved.

“I got wipes, diaper-rash cream,” Gary said.

Oh, yeah. And I was standing right in front of that gooey stuff.

Gary pulled out two cloths. “These are for the mess.” He held up a nice outfit with some tiny socks, and then he pulled out what had to be a XXXL T-shirt. “This shirt is for me in case the baby spits up on me.” He pulled out and displayed sunblock, a baby bottle, and two toys. “One toy for each hand. My baby gonna be two-fisted and ambidextrous.” He removed a small blanket and a stuffed teddy bear.

“So cute,” Sonya said.

Oh, rub it in, why don’t you!

John thought Gary was done.

Gary wasn’t done.

Two pacifiers, a changing pad, a bib, and two large freezer bags followed. “For the mess, you know, the diapers and wipes and such.”

John compared his little pile to Gary’s huge pile. My baby would hate me.

Sonya stood. “Fellas, there’s no doubt who the hands-down winner is on this one. Gary. You’ve done this before.”

“Yeah, I have,” Gary said.

“The rest of you …” Shani said. “Wow. Your babies are gonna be cryin’ for most of those eight hours.”

John tried to catch Sonya’s eye, but Sonya wouldn’t even look at him. C’mon, Sonya, John thought. You would have packed the bag for me, right?

When Sonya finally did speak to him after dinner, she only said two words—“Four diapers?”—and continued up the stairs to her room.

I should have followed Gary around, John thought. I should have crammed one of everything from that baby section into my bag. I should have paid more attention to the mothers at New Hope. I should have—

John sighed. I should have researched babies the second Sonya warned me about the challenge, but that wouldn’t have been fair to the other guys.

Lord, please help her make the next challenge something physical. It is obvious that my mind is not up to these challenges.

Instead of going on an all-day visit to David W. Streets Beverly Hills Fine Art, Galerie Michael, Spencer Jon Helfen Fine Arts, and the Sundaram Tagore Gallery in Beverly Hills, Sonya and Gary instructed their driver to take them to the Knott’s Berry Farm amusement park.

And big, tough Gary was afraid to ride any of the rides.

With an enormous amount of coaxing, Sonya eventually got Gary to ride the bumper cars and the Calico Mine Ride.

Gary was unsteady on his feet after the mine ride.

He was even a little nervous going up in the Sky Cabin.

The last ride they attempted, the Dragon Swing, made Gary sick.

Gary was later, however, still able to eat a XXXL Fatburger containing twenty-four ounces of beef and a large Fat Fries at Fatburger, where a single cameraman recorded him inhaling his meal in less than five minutes.

Sonya only had the Small Fatburger and Skinny Fries.

“Sorry about the rides,” Gary said, munching on some fries. “I had a time on that plane ride out here, too.”

“It’s okay,” Sonya said. “I’m not too good with heights either. You know, it’s still kind of early. We could go to a movie.”

I have to make this date last longer, Sonya thought. I have to punish John as much as I can. Four diapers? What was he thinking? I mean, I told him about the challenge. He should have been prepared. Maybe I just have to be more specific with him.

“It’s okay,” Gary said. “I’m kind of tired.”

But this is my date, man! “I did have fun.”

“You probably think I’m a punk,” Gary said.

“I don’t think you’re a punk.” I know you’re a punk, but only when it comes to amusement parks. Who gets sick on the Dragon Swing? He was even looking weak in the knees in the Sky Cabin.

“But you wanted to ride the big rides,” Gary said.

I did. “The little rides are just as fun if you’re with the right person.”

Gary nodded. “Yeah. It’s all about being with the right person. Or people. My kids are going to think I’m a punk.”

“I knew you had kids,” Sonya said. “Your diaper bag was perfect. How many?”

“Two. Two daughters.” He showed Sonya their pictures. “This one’s A’isha. She’s three. And this is Bria. She’s twenty months.”

Oh, they are so cute!

“I really miss them,” Gary said. “Don’t tell the producers,” he whispered, “but I’ve been talking to them just about every night.”

“As you should,” Sonya said. “And don’t whisper. You don’t have to hide your love for your children.”

“You’re right.” Gary smiled. “I really do love them. And, um, I’m not really that tired. I just promised I’d call them before they went to bed. With the time difference, I have to call them by six. I left my cell in my room.”

Sonya looked at the cameraman in the next booth. “You can use mine.” She gave Gary her phone. “Call them now.”

Gary looked at the cameraman.

“Why don’t you take a break, get some food,” Sonya said. “You know, give the man some privacy.”

“Nah, it’s okay,” Gary said, pressing the numbers. “Y’all can listen in.” He smiled. “I mean, this way I can get my girls on TV. Hey … Yeah, I know it’s a little early. I just went to Knott’s Berry Farm … I won a date, can you believe that? For properly filling a diaper bag … You taught me well.”

That has to be his baby mama, Sonya thought, and is that some … like in his voice? I think it is. There’s some definite respect there. But what’s he doing on this show if he still likes her? Maybe they parted as friends. Hmm. Who does that anymore?

“Put A’isha and Bria on the phone,” Gary said. “Hey, sweeties, it’s Daddy.”

This is too … This is something I could have done … Sonya stood. “I’ll give you some privacy, Gary. I’ll be out in the limo.”

Gary nodded. “You think I look bigger on TV? You like that doll I got you? What name did you give her? Oh, sure, we’ll play when I get home …”

Sonya stepped over to the cameraman. “C’mon.”

The cameraman tilted down the camera. “I’ll get something to eat.”

Sonya sat in the limo thinking about Kim. All those little moments I missed with Kim. I missed seeing her waking up, missed her running downstairs at Christmas, missed her birthdays, missed … too much. And here’s Gary keeping his kids in his mind all the time. He wasn’t brooding before. He was just missing his kids. Maybe that’s what I was doing during my playing days, too. Brooding. Missing my little sweetie.

Gary came to the limo, got in, and returned Sonya’s phone. “Thanks.”

The limo pulled away.

“Why’d you come on this show?” Sonya asked.

“Like the rest of the guys did, I guess,” Gary said. “Exposure. Maybe I could make some more money for my kids, you know? I did some modeling for Casual Male XL to make a few extra bucks, and a friend of mine convinced me I had a shot to do TV because of my looks and my voice. The producers of this show came to Memphis, and I talked to the old guy.”

“Larry.”

“Yeah,” Gary said. “He loves them shorts, doesn’t he?”

“Unfortunately.”

“I didn’t expect to be picked,” Gary said. “I’m kind of intimidating.”

“In looks only.” Should I tell him? Why not? “Shani calls you ‘Wider Wesley.’ She thinks you look like a bigger Wesley Snipes.”

“I’ve heard that before,” Gary said. “Not true, though.”

So humble. “How are your kids?”