1,001 Facts That Will Scare the S#*t Out of You: The Ultimate Bathroom Reader (85 page)

642

FACT :
Only a quarter of Americans know
two or more of the five freedoms
set forth by the First Amendment. More than 50 percent of Americans can name two or more members of the cartoon Simpsons family.
Yes, well,
The Simpsons
haven’t disappeared for years at a time.

Rick Shenkman, Just How Stupid Are We?: Facing the Truth About the American Voter (PublicAffairs, 2009).

643

FACT :
A majority of Americans don’t know that
we are the only country
that has used nuclear weapons in war.
Many Americans can’t even pronounce “nuclear,” so, once again, not surprising.

Rick Shenkman, Just How Stupid Are We?: Facing the Truth About the American Voter (PublicAffairs, 2009).

644

FACT :
Half of Americans believe that
the president has the power to suspend
the Constitution.
Some of them were presidents themselves. Isn’t that right, Mr. Bush?

Rick Shenkman, Just How Stupid Are We?: Facing the Truth About the American Voter (PublicAffairs, 2009).

645

FACT :
The Strategic Task Force on Education Abroad assessed Americans’ knowledge of world affairs in 2003, concluding that “America’s ignorance of the outside world” is
a “national liability” that creates a threat
to our security.
Not to be confused with The Strategic Ass Force on Educatin’ A Broad.

Rick Shenkman, Just How Stupid Are We?: Facing the Truth About the American Voter (PublicAffairs, 2009).

Burton Bollag, “Report Urges Federal Effort to Triple Number of Students Studying Abroad,” Institute Of International Education, Chronicle of Higher Education, November 21, 2003,
www.opendoors.iienetwork.org
.

646

FACT :
More than 50 percent of U.S. workers don’t
use all of their paid vacation time
; 30 percent say they don’t even take half.
For some Americans, every day at work is a paid vacation.

“Do Us A Favor, Take A Vacation,” BusinessWeek, May 21, 2007,
www.businessweek.com
.

647

FACT :
Forty-two percent of American professionals say
they are “regularly” forced
to cancel vacation plans.
The only way you’ll force me to cancel a vacation is with a gun to my head, and even then I’ll lie about canceling it.

“Do Us A Favor, Take A Vacation,” BusinessWeek, May 21, 2007,
www.businessweek.com
.

648

FACT :
Karoshi
—the phenomenon of
being worked to death
—is a Japanese phenomenon. Even the Japanese take more vacation than Americans.
Karoshi—because karaoke wasn’t enough punishment already.

“Do Us A Favor, Take A Vacation,” BusinessWeek, May 21, 2007,
www.businessweek.com
.

649

FACT : Seven percent of Americans believe that Elvis Presley is still alive
, even though the singer died in 1977. Interestingly, the percentage is even higher (ii percent) among people under age thirty, the group least likely to be Elvis fans.
Elvis is dead, trust me. If he were alive, he would deny the story that he died on the crapper. That’s just embarrassing.

“The King’s Popularity Contest,” CBS News Polls, August 11, 2002,
www.cbsnews.com
.

650

FACT :
In a 2008 poll, 41 percent of respondents said
they believe that creatures like Bigfoot exist
.
I didn’t—until I got a good look at Rosie O’Donnell.

“CNN Poll,”
BigfootForums.com
,
www.bigfootforums.com
.