Family Ties (Hidden Secrets) (18 page)

Chapter
Twenty-One

Mary

Leaving
Tobey was the hardest thing I have ever done, but what I found even harder was watching as my family tip toed around me. They treated me like I would break any moment. Maybe I would, but I definitely won’t do it in front of them.

When
I drove away from the ranch, I contemplated staying in a hotel versus going home to my parents but in the end I wanted a hug from my dad. His hugs were always what helped calm every emotion I had. Only this time it didn’t work. It only made me long for the arms of a man that betrayed me.

Pushing
him out of my head was proving difficult even as the days dragged on. For the first two days I stayed up in my room. I didn’t want to be bothered by anyone. Of course when you live in a family like mine that never happens. Being left alone when you’re hurting is absolutely not possible.

Even
ignoring everything everyone said to me and not responding didn’t detour them from coming in and bothering me. I just wanted to be left alone. That wasn’t happening so I finally started coming down the stairs after that. Never talking to anyone, but at least they were off my back about staying up in my room.

I
got a text from Tobey, but I just couldn’t bring myself to read it. It hurt enough just seeing his name show up on my phone. I was half tempted to delete it but then I knew when I could handle seeing his name on my phone, I would always wonder what it said. I would read it later when it wouldn’t hurt as bad.

Tonight
a week since I left Tobey, I ventured outside and sat on the porch swing. The cool evening air was nice and gave me a moment of peace. Just a moment. Taking a deep breath, I lean my head on the back of the swing and just tried to shut off my brain.

“
Hey.”

My
head snapped up. “What?”

“
I, uh, was just checking on you.”

“
Well you checked now go away.” I snapped.

“
Mary, please-”

“
Elijah, I don’t want to see you.”

“
Marebear.” He walked toward me.

“
Shut up, Eli! I was happy. I was happy for the first time in my life! But you couldn’t butt out of my life long enough to let me be happy! You’re just as bad as he was. I hate you!” I yelled before storming into the house and slamming the door.

“
Mary Elizabeth Williams! You bring your butt back here right now!”

Stopping
my hurry to get upstairs and away from each other, I walked back over to the door. When I got by the door, I could see Eli just standing there. He looked broken. The pieces of my heart sank in my chest at the sight of him.

“
We have been tip toeing around you for a week now. Not wanting to upset you or make matters worse. I’m sorry you’re hurting. Really I am. It breaks my heart to see one of my children hurting, but blaming Eli is not helping matters any.”

“
Do you know what he did, Mom? He investigated him. Eli investigated Tobey because he feels I can’t take care of myself! It is his fault I’m hurting right now. Tobey lied to me and hurt me too, but had Eli just stayed out of my life for one damn second I might still be happy right now!”

“
Mary Elizabeth!”

“
Forget it! If I’m so in the way…” I don’t even finish my sentence.

Turning,
I stormed upstairs and grabbed my bag that I didn’t even unpack and walked out the door with my mom yelling behind me. As I shoved past Eli, he grabbed my arm stopping me.

“
Take your hands off me Eli! I’m done. I’m in the way. Apparently I’m not hurting properly for all of you. Or not enough for some of you,” I glare at Eli. “I’m leaving.” I finished, yanking my arm from Eli’s grasp and run down the road.

Honestly
I had no idea where I was going to go, but I just couldn’t deal with the looks from my family anymore. I walked for a long time. Soon I found myself in front of Carson and Colleen’s house.

“
Mare? Are you okay?” Carson said groggily when I came inside.

“
I’m fine. Just wanted to check in on Colleen. Sorry didn’t realize the time. I’ll call her tomorrow.” I said as I started heading to the door.

“
No hun, I’m awake. What’s going on?”

“
Can,” I swallow hard. “Can I stay here tonight Curry?” Trying hard not to cry.

“
Of course. Why aren’t you at mom’s?”

“
Please don’t ask me. It’ll only be tonight please.” I was on the verge of tears and prayed he agreed before I started crying.

“
Mare you don’t have to ask. You are more than welcome here. I’ll set up the guest room.” He kissed the top of my head, took my bag, kissed Colleen and left the room.

“
Come here,” Colleen said holding out her arms.

I
went in for a hug. Well the best I could give her. The minute she wrapped her arms around me the tears started to fall. I had managed to keep them in while at mom’s. I don’t like people seeing me cry. I feel stupid.

“
Shhh, it’s okay. I have you. Just let it out.”

After
a few moments, she led me over to the couch where she held my hand and looked at me with concern.

“
Do you want to talk about?”

“
What’s there to say? I hate them both.”

“
Eli and Tobey.”

“
What the fuck did Eli do?” Carson says coming into the living room.

“
He did his normal nose into my life thing only he took it a little too far this time.”

“
What happened?” Carson asked sitting down.

So
I explained everything to both of them. I saw the tension in Carson as I explained everything that happened between me and Tobey then about what happened a week ago. My heart ached just talking about him. God I missed him. I hated myself for it, but I did.

“
Jason too?” Colleen asked shocked.

“
Yeah they were both there.”

“
Has he contacted you since you left?” Colleen asked.

“
He sent me a text message, but I haven’t read it.”

“
You loved him, didn’t you?” Carson asked.

“
Love. I love him Carson. How can I shut it off?”

Colleen
leans forward and holds my hand. “Honey, why would you want to shut it off? Love is a wonderful thing.”

I
look down. “You can say that because you have Carson. He said all the right things, made me feel things I’ve never felt before but you know what the worst part of it all is?” I ask looking up at them with tears burning my eyes.

“
What?” Colleen choked out, seemingly just as emotional as me.

“
I felt safe with him. Like no matter what, as long as I had him nothing could touch me. Then he’s the one that hurt me. He hurt me more than Kyle ever has.”

“
What do you mean?” Carson asked stiffening in his seat.

“
God, Eli’s slow. Hell I’m surprised Tobey didn’t tell everyone. Kyle’s been beating the shit out of me for a while. Happy? He did this to my face the night that Eli and Jason decided to come and ruin my happiness.”

Carson
flew up out of his seat screaming ‘what!’ accidently pushing Colleen forward. “Oh shit! I’m sorry angel. Are you okay?”

Colleen
laughed. “I’m fine.”

He
turned back to me. “What the hell Mary! Did you learn nothing from Kayla? Why the hell didn’t you tell us?”

It
was my turn to fly off the couch. “For this very reason! It’s not your problem to solve damn it! This isn’t like Kayla. I can handle Kyle!”

“
Yeah because you’ve been doing a bang up job so far!” Carson yelled in my face.

“
Fuck you!” I screamed then stormed upstairs to the room he was letting me stay in and slammed the door.

Looking
around the room, I spotted a radio. Turning it on, I walked out onto the balcony. It was cool out tonight, but it wasn’t the peacefulness I’ve been used to out on the ranch. The peacefulness I found in the eyes and arms of a man that wanted to hurt me. The song registered through my thoughts. It was Christina Aguliera and Blake Shelton’s
Just a Fool
. Boy did this song fit how I felt right now. I was just a fucking fool for ever believing anyone could love me. Turning around, I shut the radio off and crawled into bed.

** *** *** ** *** *** **

Waking up, I hear voices carrying up the stairs. Once I jumped in the shower and dressed, I grabbed my phone and called a cab then headed down stairs. When I walked into the kitchen I set my bag down. Walking out into the living room, I saw Carson, Colleen, Kayla, Jason, and Jackson.

“
Hey I’m headed out. Thanks for letting me crash here guys.” I turned to start walking out when Kayla grabs my hand.

“
Not going to say hi?” She smiles sweetly at me.

“
Hey Kay. I really have to get going. I’ll call you later.” I look at Jackson. “Hey Jacks. I’ll call you later too.” I turned to start heading out.

“
What am I invisible?” Jason joked.

“
To me you are,” I said without turning around.

Just
as I bent down to pick up my bag, Jackson pulled it from my hands. “I need to get those stitches out.”

I
huff. “Whatever. Hurry up. I have a cab waiting for me outside.”

Sitting
on the stool, Jackson started working on removing the stitches. “I talked to him, you know?”

“
Who? When?”

“
Tobey and a couple of times now,” he said but doesn’t explain.

Waiting
for him to elaborate, finally giving up. “Why are you telling me this?”

“
You always looked up to me. Always trusted my judgment.”

“
What’s your point?” I sighed.

“
The point is little sister,” he squated down in front of me, “I truly believe he never meant to hurt you. I think even if he hadn’t fallen in love with you,” he puts his fingers under my chin, “and I honestly believe he loves you. I don’t think he’d have gone through with it anyway.”

I
scoffed at him. “Why do you think that?”

“
Because when I talked to him the night Kyle beat you up, he was upset that he didn’t protect you. That you got hurt and he wasn’t there to stop it. Then when I talked to him yesterday…”

That
grabbed my attention. “You talked to him yesterday? Why would you talk to him?”

He
smirked. “Well I went by to take your stitches out and he told me you weren’t there. Honey that is a broken man. If he didn’t care about you, I doubt he would have looked like that.”

“
Why are you defending him? He wanted me for revenge Jack! Revenge. Not just sex or something like that. He intended to hurt me. That was the sole reason we met.”

“
You keep holding on to that and you’ll lose the happiness you long for. Trust me I know what I’m talking about.” He stood up, walked over to his bag, pulled a package from it, and then handed it to me. “He wanted me to give this to you. Oh and just so you know, he’s lost more than you over this. The guys left him too. They continue to work, but won’t have anything to do with him.”

Staring
down at the package he handed me, I looked up at Jackson as he started to walk way. “Jackson?”

He
turns. “Yeah?”

“
Why?” I looked up at him then.

“
Because I love you and I don’t want you missing out on a great thing.” He smiled sadly.

Placing
the package in my bag, I say my goodbyes to everyone and head outside. Kayla yelled behind me. “You’ll be at my wedding in a month right?”

Turning
around I smiled sadly at her, “I wouldn’t miss it for the world hun. Even if I’m mad at my brother-in-law.”

Climbing
in the cab, I drove off. Telling the cab driver to head to the nearest car dealership, I sit back in my seat and think about what Jackson just told me. It was funny actually. My brother seemed to be a crusader for everyone else to be happy, but himself. He thinks no one notices his sad eyes when someone falls in love or looking at our siblings that have their happily ever after, but I see them. Though I’m most curious as to why he trusts a man that broke me so much.