Dream Chaser (43 page)

Who was this
new
woman?
The new Suzanna wan
ted a relationship among equals…
with her son, and with a man, and yes, even with
her daughter
who, for some reason was more threatened by
her mother’s
new
persona
than anyone else.

Had
Penny
recognized the new Suzanna before she, herself, had—and was
she frightened because this was no longer
the mother she knew? Suzanna got up from the chair, surprised at her own dawning awareness. Poor
Penny…
she must have been terrified.
First to lose the father she adored, a father she’d so recently learned was not the paragon she thought he was. And, then to
los
e
the only mother she had ever known.

Suzanna’s mind skittered off
Penny
and
back
to Jonathan. She
hoped
he
also wanted
a relationship among equals. He had introduced her to his love with such great tenderness
and passion, as if he couldn’t get enough of her pleasure. Y
et when she took the initiative, he seemed as pleased as
when
he made the first move. Was that why it was so easy to enjoy a physical relationship with him, even though she hadn’t been able to
tell him until recently what he wanted to hear, that she loved him
with all her heart, that s
he trusted him,
that she want
ed
to share her life with him?

When they were together, Jonathan seemed to fill the room with his strength of character, his gentle calmness. He had always been truthful with her, and open. With Jonathan, she’d felt uplifted, able to try new things and not be afraid. Scenes of their time together, when he’d shone her how he felt about her, yet gave her a chance to tell him how she felt, to come to him because she wanted to, flashed through her brain.

Her
old
fears had pr
evented her from moving forward,
had trapped her in a recurring nightmare in which she fell over a precipice into a pit of unknown depth, a pit from which she could not escape demands she wasn’t prepared to face and overcome. She stood up.

“It’s time,” she declared
, the words echoing in the nearly-empty sunroom
.

She reached for the phone to call Jonathan
and
had to settle for voice mail again.
Another meeting?
Disappointed, she went back upstairs to pack away some of the
children’s
toys and games. She spent most of the
afternoon cleaning closets
and rearranging furnishings.

She took another short
break when the realtor came by.
“Let me show you what I’ve done.” As they moved from one room to the next, Suzanna assured her, “I’m not quite ready for you to put
up
the sign. But, if you have someone who wants to look and doesn’t care about the mess, bring them over. I don’t mind.”

When she went to bed
in the guest room
, she dreamed of the new
cottage
at the ranch, seeing her grandmother’s quilt on a bed there. Sam Two sat on the front porch and barked at her as she moved closer to consciousness.

Chapter 22

Jonathan settled back in
the taxi
. He set his
Stetson
on his knee, rubbing the brim to dispel his nerves. Were two days enough for her to decide to come with him? Every hour at Jamie’s, even planning the upcoming retreat for the grad students, had been agony. His mind wasn’t on it, his heart wasn’t in it. That first night, Jamie had finally told him to go take a cold shower and go to bed so he could concentrate the next day.

As if that had helped. But Jonathan had promised to give Suzanna time. No pressure from him.

He gave a little cough and cleared his throat as the cab moved smoothly through the traffic and turned into the residential neighborhood near her home.

“You say something?” t
he driver asked.

“No, just clearing my throat.”
He ran his fingers along the hat brim and mentally practiced what he was going to say. One hand slid inside his coat to his inner pocket, assuring himself he hadn’t forgotten what he wanted to show her. He let his breath out in a slow hiss, willing himself to be as calm as the trees that canopied the road, their leaves still. Even the birds seemed to have ceased their singing, waiting for Suzanna’s decision.

The cab driver’s voice intruded.
“
Summer colds are going around.
You got
one
?”

“Uh, no.” But Jonathan
cleared his throat again
as the cab turned onto her street. The homes they passed were set in the middle of spacious lawns, the tall trees along the boulevard seeming to hush all extraneous noise.

Would Penny be there? He prayed not. Their conversation at the wedding reception had been polite enough, each of them trying extra hard, it seemed.

When the cab pulled up in front of the stately Tudor, Jonathan grabbed his hat and reached for the door.
If she wasn’t home, he’d just wait on the porch, or maybe in the backyard.
I’ll go talk to Sam in the flower bed if I have to.

“Nice neighborhood.”

“Yes
, it is
.” Jonathan paid
the cabbie
and
turn
ed toward the house.

“Don’t forget this.” The cabbie handed him his overnight bag
, which Jamie, with a telling grin, had insisted he take with him
.

“Thanks.”

“You want m
e to wait?
”

“
No
.”

His heart thudded as he approached the door. He rang the bell
. The cab drove away and silence descended. He waited, feeling his pulse begin to race
.
He was about to ring the bell again when Suzanna opened the door.

A
scarf
held
her hair
off her face. She was
wearing a paint-stained tee-shirt that did nothing to hide her curves,
jeans
cut off above the
knee
s,
and a pair of mismatched
knee
socks.

He looked her up and down for a moment, unable to stop beaming. “Nice outfit.”

She opened her mouth to say something, and he took advantage to kiss her after stepping into the foyer.

He brushed a piece of lint off her cheek.
“
Hello. How have you been?” When he hugged her
again
, he could f
eel her heart pumping, keeping time with his own.

She looked up at him
, smiling broadly
. “Busy
.”

She
linked
her
hand with his as they strolled into the living room
. “Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?
I thought you must be trapped in meetings when I called your cell and you didn’t pick up. But then I figured, hoped, actually, that you might come over.”

“It took Jamie and me a little longer than expected.”
He put down his bag.
“We had some extra planning to do for the next academic year. I figured this was as good a time as any to do it.”
And I didn’t want to leave without you.

“Oh.” A smile played about the edges of her mouth, a mouth he wanted to cover with his own again. His pulse picked up.
“
And I wanted to surprise you.
Don’t you like surprises?”

“As a matter of fact, I do…when the surprise is you.
”
She grinned.

“I’m glad.” He kissed her again
, willing his heart to stop jumping in his chest
.

She put down the dust cloth
she’d been clutching
. “I had an epiphany the other day. I k
now what’s been holding me back,
keeping me from making a decision.”

“That’s good to hear. I… uh, I
als
o have…
I need to—”

“Are you getting ready to sneeze?
Let me get you a tissue.
”

“No, sneezing isn’t my problem.”
His foot jerked up and down. He decided to ease into the topic.
“I had a nice chat with Kevin
before he went off on his honeymoon
.
He reminded me that I have been remiss.
”

At her quizzical look, he smiled, feeling better after taking another deep breath.
“
I debated calling you and then decided
it would be better if I…uh, just came over
.” He paused. “Do you have
some tea or coffee? My throat…it i
s kind of dry.”

“Of course.”

He followed her into the kitchen, happy to concentrate on the look of her rounded bottom in those old jeans. The corner of one back pocket was torn away. The hole showed him she was wearing a pair of panties with a leopard print design.

He gulped down
a
glass of water
while the tea kettle heated
.

She reached for his hand and pulled him
in the direction of the stairs
. “
Before the kettle starts singing, I’d like your opinion…
about the house.”

She took him through
each of
the rooms
, describing what she’d done in each
.

“You’ve
made more changes. I like what I see,
”
he said as they went back downstairs.

“Do you t
hink someone will want to buy this place
?”
she asked.

His heart soared.
She must have called the realtor.
But there was no sign out front. Maybe they didn’t do that in this neighborhood.
“What about Kevin and
Penny
? Do they know you want to sell the house?”

She looked sidelong at him
and a slow smile grew
.
“Doesn’t matter. It’s
my decision.”

He squeezed her hand
, thrilled at the news
. “Good for you.”

“Well,
what do you think?”
she pressed.

He looked around again when they had returned to the living room. “The
house feels—different. Warmer,
more you.” He s
at her down on the couch. “
I’m sure
someone will love it
.”

She stood up.
“Super!
I’ve been
cleaning and sprucing
for hours and I can’t even remember
if
I
stopped for lunch. Can we grab a bite to eat? I’m starving. But let me change into something better than these old jeans. People will think you’re feeding a bag lady if I’m seen in this outfit.”

He laughed. “We can do that. But n
ot just yet.
You asked for my advice. Now
I need your
s
.”

He pulled a small box from his pocket
and opened it to reveal
an antique ring with a large diamond
set in
a silver filigree
setting. “This was my mother’s. M
y Dad had it made for her for their
twentie
th
anniversary. When Neil was home this spring, Christine, too…
we talk
ed. I thought Neil might want it
for when he gets married.
He’s pretty serious about a woman.
” He paused
, aware that his heart was thudding against his ribs.

“
But
his girlfriend doesn’t like antiques
,
”
he continued, and
cleared his throat again. “So I thought I would ask if you thou
ght the stone should be removed and placed in
a more modern
setting.”

Suzanna
held the ring up to the light, angling it first one way and then another. “It’s beautiful.
I’ll bet
your mother
loved this ring.
” She looked down at the ring again.
“W
hoever wears it will be wearing history, the history of your family. That’s so important, Jonathan, not something to be
changed
.
I’d leave it just as it is
.” She slipped the ring back in its box and patted the lid.

“Maybe your
granddaughter will want it someday,
”
she added.

The tea kettle began its shrill singing.

“Let me get that.”

He watched her prepare the pot and take down two cups and saucers.

“Let it steep. Come sit with me.”
He was silent
for a long moment
. “I was hoping
, uh…
” He took her hand in his. “I—uh—I—”

She stood suddenly. “Let me get
the tea
.
You must be bothered by the dust I’ve been stirring up…
from all the furniture moving I’ve been doing.”

“I don’t need
anything more to drink
.” He reached for her hand
s
and pulled her back down on the couch next to him.
“Suzanna
, I had a long talk with Chrissie
and
Neil before my trip to London
.”
He remembered how concerned they had seemed at first. Was it Chrissie who had asked if he wasn’t rushing into things? It didn’t matter now, because gradually they had relaxed, particularly after they had a chance to think about what he’d said that evening and the next day, too. He suspected Curly had spoken to Neil when they rode out to check the cattle. He knew Nate had added his two cents when Chrissie had helped him bake cookies the night before she drove into town to see Abby. He guessed Abby had probably said something, too, while she was playing with the baby. Abby was never at a loss for opinions, especially about him.

“I’m so glad they came to see you.
How’s baby Melissa?”
Suzanna
smiled.

You’d be the best grandmother for that child.
“Cute as can be. She has a
fierce
temper. I t
hink she’s going to give Chrissie
a run for her money when she’s a teen.” He
beam
ed, and imagined Jamie telling him to stay on track
, to get on with it
.

“I know she’
ll grow up loving her wonderful grandfather.” S
uzanna
brushed her hand along the
near
side of his face.

“I told them—Christine and
Neil
—about this person who out
-
negotiated me last year
,
something that doesn’t happen very often. I lost a long-standing bet to Jamie on that one.”

“I hope you figured out a way to make that negotiation
a win-win. Isn’t that what you’
re always aiming for?”
She placed her hand in his.

He cleared his throat. “Well, that depends
,” he said, and took a deep breath. “O
n your answer to my question.” He looked into the pools of her green eyes, his heart
seeming to skip a beat
. He
removed the ring from the box again. “
My mother love
d
this ring.
She would have wanted… if she were alive,
she would love
for
you to wear it. So would I.”