Cinderella Ate My Daughter (23 page)

138 must be derived: Self-esteem is defined as “the value an individual attaches to the mental picture of himself or herself.” Patterns of self-esteem are made up of combinations of competence and worthiness: Carol Lynn Martin and Richard Fabes,
Discovering Childhood Development
, p. 301. If what makes a girl feel “high worth” is looking sexy and she achieves that, her self-esteem may be great but perhaps not derived from the most appropriate or most sustainable of sources. What’s more, as the psychologist Jean Twenge has pointed out, self-esteem without basis breeds narcissism. “Study Sees Rise in Narcissism Among Students,”
Day to Day
, NPR, February 27, 2007, www .npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyid=7618722&ps=rs.

138 an article I recently saw: “Stars Who Make over 40 Look Fab,”
More,
October 2009, www.more.com/2049/9377-stars-who -make-over-40#1. To be fair, the magazine also ran groundbreaking pictures of the famously fit actress Jamie Lee Curtis, then forty-three, posed in her underwear, without benefit of stylists, makeup, or Photoshop. She looked as bulgy as any of us. The next page showed Curtis glammed up like a star—a transformation, she said, that took thirteen people three hours to achieve. Amy Wallace, “Jamie Lee Curtis: True Thighs,”
More
, September 2002, www.more.com/2049/2464-jamie -lee-curtis-true-thighs.

138 “Should women simply”: Cited in Catherine Saint Louis, “Appreciating Your Value as You Age,”
The New York Times
, March 18, 2010, p. E3.

139 Most of the 9.3 million: American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery,
Cosmetic Surgery National Data Bank Statistics
.

139 a new picture book: Michael Salzhauer,
My Beautiful Mommy
; the recommended reading level for this book on Amazon .com is four to eight years of age; www.amazon.com/Beautiful -Mommy-Michael-Alexander-Salzhauer/dp/1601310323.

139 Nearly 43,000 children: American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery,
Cosmetic Surgery National Data Bank Statistics
.

139 That does not include: Ibid.

139 the 12,000: Catherine Saint Louis, “This Teenage Girl Uses Botox. No, She’s Not Alone,”
The New York Times
, August 12, 2010, p. E1.

140 for girls growing up: Joan Jacobs Brumberg,
The Body Project
, p. xxi.

141 try not commenting: A 2004 survey of 3,000 women in ten countries commissioned by Dove’s “Real Beauty” campaign found that only 2 percent of women said they would describe themselves as beautiful, while two-thirds said they avoided basic activities—including going to work or school and voicing opinions—on days they felt unattractive. Nancy Etcoff, Susie Orbach, Jennifer Scott, and Heidi D’Agostino, “The Real Truth About Beauty: A Global Report,” www.cam paignforrealbeauty.com/uploadedfiles/dove_white_paper_ final.pdf.

142 I took the quandary: Author’s interview with Catherine Steiner-Adair, director of eating disorders education and prevention at the Klarman Eating Disorders Center at McLean Hospital, Belmont, Mass., May 2, 2010.

146 Consider a 2007 survey: Catalyst,
The Double-Bind Dilemma.

147 40 percent of men: J. Walter Thompson, “Millennial Women Face Gender Issues,” press release, April 24, 2008.

148 “Excellent question!”: Marc Santora, “Pointed Question Puts McCain in Tight Spot,”
The New York Times
, November 14, 2007, www.nytimes.com/2007/11/14/us/politics/14mccain.html.

148 Rush Limbaugh declared: Ellen Goodman, “Eek! It’s a Wrinkle!” December 19, 2007, www.truthdig.com/report/item/20071219_eek_its_a_wrinkle/.

148 “aging and resentful female”: Christopher Hitchens, “Identity Crisis,”
Slate
, January 7, 2008, www.slate.com/id/2181460/.

148 the novelist Susanna Moore: Susan Morrison, ed.,
Thirty Ways of Looking at Hillary
.
New York Times
reviewer Michiko Kakutani commented that the book underscored “this willful focus on the personal” in the analysis of Clinton; see “Candidate Clinton Scrutinized by Women,”
The New York Times
, January 15, 2008, www.nytimes.com/2008/01/15/books/15kaku.html.

148 “The mind… strays”: Robin Givhan, “Wearing the Pants,”
The Washington Post
, December 9, 2007, www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/12/08/AR2007120801502 .html.

148 she used her position: Jo Becker, Peter S. Goodman, and Michael Powell, “Once Elected, Palin Hired Friends and Lashed Foes,”
The New York Times,
September 14, 2008, p. A1; Katie Couric, “One-on-One with Sarah Palin,”
CBS Evening News
, September 24, 2008, www.cbsnews.com/stories/2008/09/24/eveningnews/main4476173.shtml.

149 Palin had been dubbed: Carolyn Lockhead, “Who’s Sarah Palin? She’s Hot Where He’s Not,” Weblog entry, “Below the Beltway,”
San Francisco Chronicle
, March 1, 2008, www.sfgate .com/cgi-bin/blogs/nov05election/detail?blogid=14&entry _id=24593.

149 a woman at a firehouse: Tony Plohetski, “Defacing at Fire Station Unsolved,”
The Austin American-Statesman
, January 10, 2007, www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1765197/posts.

151 the culture ultimately offers: Sharon Lamb and Lyn Mikel Brown,
Packaging Girlhood
.

153 the movement went alt-rock: Hole, in turn, paved the way for Alanis Morissette, whose 1995 album,
Jagged Little Pill
, a sometimes scathing—but endlessly catchy—ode to female coming-of-age, was one of the decade’s top sellers.

154 something called “girlie feminism”: See Jennifer Baumgardner and Amy Richards,
Manifesta (10th Anniversary Edition)
, p. 80.

Chapter 9: Just Between You, Me, and My 622 BFFs

160 A digital divide was looming: Matthew DeBell and Chris Chapman,
Computer and Internet Use by Children and Adolescents in 2003
, p. v.

160 35 million kids: Ibid., p. iii.

161 Girls spend the same: Ibid., p. v.

161 Girls, meanwhile, are: Amanda Lenhart, Mary Madden, Aaron Smith, and Alexandra Macgill,
Teens and Social Media
.

161 Doll sales have declined: Lini S. Kadaba, “Girls Abandon Dolls for Web-based Toys,”
The Philadelphia Enquirer
, March 31, 2010, www.philly.com/inquirer/magazine/89579552.html #axzz0nvMSGtfF.

162 It chilled me: Ibid.

162 Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act: For more on COPPA, see www.coppa.org/coppa.htm.

163 3.7 million teens: Mike Shields, “Kids’ Virtual Worlds Gain Traction,”
Mediaweek
, May 22, 2009, www.adweek.com/aw/content_display/news/digital/e3i9659c5aa3ebf28066173d de9ce1c5366.

165 young people’s real-life identities: Author’s interview with Adriana Manago, Department of Psychology and Children’s Digital Media Center, UCLA, May 7, 2010; Adriana Manago, Michael B. Graham, Patricia M. Greenfield, and Goldie Salimkhan, “Self-Presentation and Gender on MySpace.”

166 scores of the 16,475: “Study Sees Rise in Narcissism Among Students,”
Day to Day
, February 27, 2007, www.npr.org/tem plates/story/story.php?storyId=7618722&ps=rs; Associated Press, “College Students Think They’re
So
Special,” February 27, 2007, www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17349066/.

166 empathy, too, seems: “Empathy: College Students Don’t Have as Much as They Used to, Study Finds,”
Science Daily
, May 29, 2010, www.sciencedaily.com/releases/ 2010/05/100528081434.htm.

167 provocative photos: Author’s interview with Adriana Manago; Manago et al., “Self-Presentation and Gender on MySpace.”

168 the first high-profile case: Jennifer Steinhauer, “Verdict in MySpace Suicide Case,”
The New York Times
, November 27, 2008, p. A25.

169 Phoebe Prince: Brian Ballou and John Ellement, “9 Charged in Death of South Hadley Teen, Who Took Life After Bullying,”
The Boston Globe
, March 29, 2010, www.boston.com/news/ local/breaking_news/2010/03/holding_for_pho.html.

169 Alexis Pilkington: Oren Yaniv, “Long Island Teen’s Suicide Linked to Cruel Cyberbullies, Formspring.me Site: Police,”
Daily News
, March 25, 2010, www.nydailynews.com/news/ny_crime/2010/03/25/2010-03-25_li_teens_suicide_linked_to_cruel_cyberbullies_police.html; “Cyber Bullies Harass Teen Even After Suicide,”
The Huffington Post
, March 24, 2010, www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/03/24/alexis-pilking ton-faceboo_n_512482.html.

169 half of young people: Associated Press and MTV, “A Thin Line: Executive Summary,” MTV, December 2009, www.athinline .org/MTV-AP_Digital_Abuse_Study_Executive_Summary .pdf. A report by the Pew Internet and American Life Project put the rates of cyberbullying at one-third of teens; 38 percent of girls in that survey experienced harassment versus 26 percent of boys. Amanda Lenhart,
Cyberbullying
, www.pewinter net.org/reports/2007/cyberbullying.aspx.

170 39 percent: The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy,
Sex and Tech: Executive Summary
.

171 the annual “slut list”: Tina Kelley, “A Rite of Hazing Now Out in the Open,”
The New York Times
, September 18, 2009, p. A13; Tina Kelley, “When the Cool Get Hazed,”
The New York Times
, September 27, 2009, p. WK5.

172 Megan Meier, the girl: Steinhauer, “Verdict in MySpace Suicide Case”; “Cyber Bullies Harass Teen Even After Suicide.”

172 Phoebe Prince seems to have: Emily Bazelon, “What Really Happened to Phoebe Prince?”
Slate
, July 20, 2010, www.slate .com/id/2260952.

Chapter 10: Girl Power—No, Really

180 café au lait variation: While young black women are not affected by exposure to idealized images of white women, they report higher levels of body dissatisfaction after viewing those of African-American women. Cynthia Frisby, “Does Race Matter?” See also Taneisha S. Buchanan et al., “Testing a Culture-Specific Extension of Objectification Theory Regarding African American Women’s Body Image.”

180 the first pass: Bobbi Misick, “Controversy over ‘The Princess and the Frog,’ ” Weblog entry,
Essence
, November 30, 2009, www.essence.com/entertainment/film/critics_dispute_prin cess_and_the_frog.php.

180 Disney also miscalculated: Ibid.

181 by consulting Oprah Winfrey: Chuck Barney, “Disney’s First Black Princess Has Parents Excited,”
Contra Costa Times
, December 11, 2009, www.popmatters.com/pm/article/117751 -disneys-first-black-princess-has-parents-excited.

182 marketing to children under twelve: Sarah Ellison, “Marketing to Children Sparks Criticism in Europe,”
The Wall Street Journal
, December 18, 2000, p. 1. Denmark, meanwhile, bans ads aimed at children within ninety seconds of children’s programming. State broadcasters in Belgium can’t air ads directed at kids for five minutes on either side of a children’s show. In Greece, there are no toy advertisements before 10
P.M.
Norway, the Netherlands, Ireland, and Austria all have some restrictions.

184 squat thrusts in an oversized cage: See Miley Cyrus “Can’t Be Tamed” video, released May 2010, www.youtube.com/watch?v=sjSG6z_13-Q. Cyrus also made headlines in 2010 for kissing a female backup dancer during an onstage rendition of that song. “Girl-on-girl” action between straight women is another example of female sexuality as a performance for others’ pleasure.

186 Your attempt to deconstruct: Author’s interview with Sahara Byrne, Department of Communications, Cornell University, May 28, 2010. See also Sahara Byrne and Philip Solomon Hart, “The Boomerang Effect”; Sahara Byrne, Daniel Linz, and James W. Potter, “Test of Competing Cognitive Explanations for the Boomerang Effect in Response to the Deliberate Disruption of Media-Induced Aggression.”

186 the “forbidden fruit” effect: Amy I. Nathanson, “Identifying and Explaining the Relationship”; Nathanson, “The Unintended Effects of Parental Mediation of Television on Adolescents.”

186 Meanwhile, a 2009 study: Byrne, Linz, and Potter, “Test of Competing Cognitive Explanations.”

186 pointing out inaccurate: Nathanson, “The Unintended Effects.”

186 talking to little girls: Byrne et al., “Test of Competing Cognitive Explanations.”

186 Going all Amish: Nathanson, “The Unintended Effects”; Byrne and Hart, “The Boomerang Effect.”

187 Lyn Mikel Brown: Lamb and Brown,
Packaging Girlhood
, pp. 263-294.

187 otherwise, your presence: Nathanson, “Identifying and Explaining the Relationship.”

187 ones who are skeptical: Author’s interview with Erica Weintraub Austin, Edward R. Murrow School of Communication, Washington State University, May 8, 2010.

189 The studio’s lack of interest: Manohla Dargis and A. O. Scott, “Memos to Hollywood,”
The New York Times
, May 3, 2009, p. MT1.