Zombie Rules (22 page)

             
Macie broke the silence. “Well, I’m glad you’re alive, Zach.”

             
I scoffed. “If you say so.” There was more awkward silence. “Anyway, I guess I am glad the two of you have survived as well. I mean it. But you two did not drive all the way out here just to convey your heartfelt love. What’s going on here?”

             
She looked down a moment and then inhaled before answering. “We were hoping you would provide us with some food.” She said.

             
“Now why in the world did you think Rick and I, of all people, would have enough food to go around?” I was met by downcast stares.

             
“I guess what I’m asking is, is there some kind of information you two possess which makes you think that we have loads of spare food? Spit it out.” There was no pun intended in that last remark. I swear.

             
Jason looked up then. He had a hint of a scowl. He did not like the way I was talking to them. “We’ve met some people that said you guys have plenty, more than enough in fact.” He said.

             
I thought about his statement and how he said it. “What exactly do you mean by more than enough?” I got more silent stares. “Who told you that load of crap?” I tried to sound casual. I knew who they were referring to. I just wanted to see if they would give me an honest answer.

             
“Janet, Julie, and Tommy Frierson.” Macie answered. Jason cut his eyes at her, but said nothing.

             
I slowly nodded. “They were here a while back along with a man named Don, but they’re exaggerating a great deal. We have some stuff Rick and I canned back this fall, but quite a bit of it is gone, thanks to the Friersons. All they ever did was sit around and eat.” I acted as though I were thinking it over. I kicked a pebble with my boot. “I suppose we can spare a small amount. What do you have to trade for?”

             
This earned me a stupefied look from both of them. I frowned. “Wait, am I to understand the two of you rode up here expecting a free handout?”

             
Jason could not hide his scowl any longer. “Look Zach, we aren’t looking to bother you or anything.” Lie. He suddenly squinted up toward the house. I bet he was wondering where Rick was, and if he was about to be shot. Good. “As you can see, Macie is pregnant. She needs food.”

             
“Not just food, she needs sustenance. Nutrition. Have you two even bothered to determine the daily nutritional needs of an average person? Calorie intake? How about the daily amount of water the average human needs?”

             
I did not get a verbal response, only silent stares. I sighed and shook my head. Yeah, I was being a smartass, but so what. “So, you two didn’t answer me. Do you or do you not have anything to trade?”

             
Macie actually hung her head now, like a puppy dog being scolded for crapping on the carpet. A part of me hoped I had punched some buttons with her self-esteem. Much like she did to me not so long ago. Jason, on the other hand, narrowed his eyes and rubbed his hands together, like he wanted to hit me again.

             
He took a slow breath and spoke. “No Zach, we didn’t think to bring anything. I have no idea what you would want anyway.”

             
I clenched my teeth together and forced myself to be silent for a moment. My emotions and my aforementioned logic of putting aside old grudges were contradicting each other. I got my thoughts in order before responding. “Okay, fair enough. Think of it from this perspective. There are many products out there which would be sought after commodities. Food, fresh water, medical supplies, fuel. You get the idea. One thing I really want from you two is honesty, and I believe you are being at least somewhat honest with me Jason.”

             
I walked over to the ATV and retrieved the MREs. “Here.” I said handing the cases over the wire to him. I then did a quick signal behind my back. It was good for now, but it could change. I watched their hands and kept an eye back down the road. I mean, it was entirely possible the two of them had dropped their friends off before driving up here and they were now sneaking up through the woods to take a few shots at me. “It’s not much, but if you ration it out, it’ll keep you two going for a couple of weeks. How many are in your group?”

             
Jason looked over at Macie. She answered. “There are eight of us altogether.”

             
I whistled and shook my head. “There is no conceivable way we can feed all eight of you. I might be persuaded to butcher a cow, but cows are hard to come by these days. What you have in your hand now will be the only freebies you’ll get. We’re not a welfare agency. You come back with stuff to trade for, or don’t bother coming back at all. And only you two, I’m not interested in meeting your friends. In fact, if any of your friends show up, it will tell me you told them where Rick and I live. Then it’ll be open season on all of you, you included Macie.” Her eyes widened at this threat.

             
“Oh…” I acted like I was in deep thought. “Speaking of friends, Jason what was the name of your center on the football team?”

             
His eyes narrowed. “Jasper Goad, why?”

             
“He was one of the punks who put the boots to me. The other one, your friend Darius, did he survive?” They both nodded. I looked at Macie. “Have you seen Felix?”

             
“I haven’t seen him.” She answered. “I’ve not seen anyone else from High School.”

             
Jason interrupted. “Wait, wait. Why did you want to know Jasper’s name?” He demanded. His eyes were still narrowed at me.

             
I fixed him with a stare of my own. “We bumped into each other one night in a parking lot. He never bothered telling me his name, but he attacked me again and tried to rob me. He bit off more than he could chew, metaphorically speaking.” Both of them paled in realization. My voice went down an octave. “Jason, keep your boy Darius away from me. As far as I’m concerned, he’s a kill on sight target.”

             
Jason nodded his head slowly, but there was no friendliness in his eyes. “I wouldn’t go around making offhanded threats like that if I were you, Zach. Darius is pretty tough.”

             
“I’m sure people said the same of Jasper. If Darius is truly your friend, you’d best warn him.” I was through with the chit chat, Jason was starting to irritate me and I really wanted this to be a civil meeting.

             
He stared at me for a moment. I was not sure what he was thinking. Any thoughts he may have had about how he was going to handle me seemed to have fizzled. He did not like me, but hunger was the stronger feeling. He looked over the boxes. Macie pointed at them. “What are those?”

             
“Military rations. They’re stored in individually sealed packages. Each package is supposed to have the correct amount of nutrition.” I did not tell her they tasted awful. She looked at me appreciatively and silently said thank you.

             
“When can we come back?” Jason asked.

             
“I’m thinking Sunday afternoons will be good for Rick and me. Make it two weeks from today.”

             
“Where is Rick?” Macie suddenly asked. I bet they were wondering the whole time where he may be.

             
“Oh, he’s nearby. Guys, I guess I should have said this earlier, just don’t do anything sudden or anything which could be perceived as hostile. He’s probably got his crosshairs on one of you. I don’t know which of you he dislikes the most.” I looked around nervously and lowered my voice to just above a whisper. “Listen, steer clear of him. Just between us, he’s gone off the deep end. He thinks he’s back in Vietnam and wanders around the farm dressed like Rambo. It’s got me a bit worried.”

             
Jason scoffed and kicked at a rock. Macie looked around worriedly before she continued. “Uh, okay. What kind of items are you willing to trade for? I mean, like Jason said, we have no idea what you want.”

             
I sighed deeply. I couldn’t help it. “I’m getting the distinct impression you two, and your group, have done no planning whatsoever.” Jason scoffed again. He did not like being on the defensive. “Here is why I say that. If you think it through, you will know exactly what commodities are valuable items. Those same items would make them good for barter as well.” I tried to keep it simple. “Food for example, if you find four boxes of Corn Flakes, bring two of them back here and we’ll work out some kind of trade. And of course, there are many other items which would be considered valued commodities like gasoline, hygiene products, toilet paper, toothpaste, dental floss, weapons, ammo, any type of medical supplies. C’mon you two, think it through. Put together a plan with your friends on how to most efficiently gather supplies. You get the idea, right?” They looked at each other and nodded grudgingly.

             
“Good, because we only have a limited supply. Rick and I will be lucky if we can last until summer, but I’ll try to work with you two.” I looked at them. They seemed to be accepting the advice that I was offering them, but you never know.

             
I glanced at my watch. “We need to wrap this up. I’ve got stuff to do now, so we can talk again in two weeks. Meet me at this spot at, let’s say four p.m. By the way, congratulations on the pregnancy. I truly hope you two are happy and you have a healthy baby.” I turned to go, but stopped. “If you don’t mind me saying so, get away from those so-called friends. Find an out of the way place and make yourselves a home. We’ll try to help if we can. We’ll give you some cattle. We’ll help you get a garden going in the spring. I mean it.”

             
Jason motioned with the boxes of rations. “Thanks man.” I nodded in acknowledgement. Macie did not respond. She just stared at me sadly. I could see her eyes watering up. They drove away soon after.

              It all started with sharing the shower. One evening after a hard day of work, Julie pointed out we’d save water and generator fuel if we shared a shower. I immediately concurred with her astute logic. Sharing was always good, right? She was even kind enough to help soap me up. I returned the favor of course. After helping dry each other off, we agreed, by extension of her logic, sharing the same bed would keep us both warmer at night rather than the illogical practice of using separate beds.

             
You get the idea. We were attracted to each other. I think we both knew it from the start, but we were still awkward teenagers. Nevertheless, the more time we spent together, the stronger our mutual attraction became. It was inevitable I suppose. I missed Rick, I missed him a lot. But, Julie was turning into a pretty damn good friend.

Once we became intimate, it was like the dam had burst. We went through a couple of boxes of condoms in no time. After one particularly invigorating lovemaking session, we were entwined in each other’s arms talking about an unplanned pregnancy.

              “I think I’d like having your child.” Julie commented. It was muffled because her head was buried in the crook of my neck. Even so, I heard it clearly. “What do you think?”

             
“There is the potential for a lot of problems in pregnancy and childbirth. Back before the outbreak, the maternal death rate was approximately 200,000 to 800,000 a year. A lack of access to health care in the third world countries accounted for the largest percentage of those numbers. That’s essentially what we are now, a third world country. It’d be risky, nothing at all like that old Brooke Shields movie.”

             
“Which one?” She asked.

             
“Blue Lagoon.” I answered.

             
“I’ve never seen it.”

             
“It’s one of those mushy romantic movies made in 1980. Two kids played by Brook Shields and Christopher Atkins are stranded on an island together. They grow up. They figure out how to have sex. She gets pregnant and has a beautiful healthy baby. All is perfect. They never even get a mosquito bite.”

             
“Sounds cheesy.” She said. I grunted in agreement. “So what will we do?”

             
I shrugged. “Out of all of these survivors, one would hope there are a few doctors and nurses out there. I need to get on the Ham radio more often and reach out to these people.” I chuckled. “Maybe you should be the one on the radio. If it’s your voice, some old lonely, horny doctor will surely come out of the woodwork.”

             
Julie giggled. “I guess in the meantime I should learn how to give a blowjob. Maybe I should start right now.” She moved her head off of my shoulder. I soon let out a long involuntary moan.

             
Afterward, I got up and checked on the laundry. We had clothes lines strung up inside the house due to the freezing temperatures outside. I retrieved the clean clothes from the washer and handed them to Julie. She started hanging them to dry. “I need to turn the generator off before bed. I’ll be right back.”