Z-Burbia 7: Sisters of the Apocalypse (5 page)

The shadows down the tunnel rush at me. They are a lot closer than I thought since they are dressed all in black. Tunnel ninjas! Fucking tunnel ninjas!

I want to yell that at them, since that's what Long Pork would have done and I miss him, but I can't squeeze out no words. I barely get my head turned and I can see Froggy Girl behind me, her whole body braced against the grate, her arms pulling the rope tight, tight, tight.

Well, I still got a trick up my sleeve. Not really up my sleeve. It's on my belt.

I pull my knife and slash at the rope just as the shadows reach me. I take a blow to the gut from a table leg that's been made into a club. I grunt, but fall to my knees and avoid the next hit as the rope around my neck is sliced away by my knife. It's a sharp fucking knife.

Froggy Girl cries out as she's sent falling into the culvert outside. That's what happens when you put all your weight in one place. That place being my throat. There's a loud splash and one of the tunnel ninjas looks past me and cries out.

"Inez!" the tunnel ninja shouts.

Huh? Inez? That wasn't Inez. I saw Inez and she was a lot older than Froggy Girl. Which is what I'm going to call her because I ain't calling her Inez when she ain't Inez. That's stupid talk.

The first tunnel ninja, the one that hit me with the table leg, brings it up high like she is going to smash me. Yeah, it's a she. I can see boob mounds under her black shirt. She's also a total rookie when it comes to fighting. With that table leg up high, she's left herself wide open.

Wide open for me to slash her belly and let her guts spill out all over the sidewalk ledge. She screams and drops the table leg which I catch in my free hand. As she screams, I sweep her legs with the table leg and send her into the stream. The other tunnel ninja, the one that shouted at Froggy Girl, screams too and reaches for her ninja buddy. Yep, she's a girl too. I know that not just because I hear her screechy voice, but because I can see more boob mounds.

Boob mounds. That's funny.

The second tunnel ninja gets a knife to the side of her neck as she reaches for tunnel ninja one. Blood spurts across my face and she falls into the stream after her friend. Her body gets pushed up against the grate then goes under. Not just under the water, but under the grate. I watch as her body falls into the culvert and joins her friend's.

Neither of them is moving, so I guess my knife did the trick. I wipe it off and slip it back into its sheath then find my metal bars and tuck those into my belt. Once I know they're secure, I take a deep breath and jump into the stream. I was right, it's only two feet deep.

I grab onto the grate as the stream pushes at my legs. I let my legs get swept away and I feel them go under the grate without a problem. The bars have been cut loose below the water line. More of those amazing deep breaths and I swing my legs under, duck my top back, and let the stream carry me out into the culvert.

It would be nice if it was an easy drop, but this being the apocalypse and shit, there's debris in the culvert. My ass hits hard on something and I go all the way underwater. A quick twist and I see an old car upside down at the bottom of the culvert. My ass hit a rotten tire.

There're two Zs inside the upside-down car, still strapped into their seats. They ain't got no eyes left, but the thump from my ass must have woken them up because they're reaching out the broken windshield at me. Keep reaching, Zs, keep reaching.

I let the culvert stream carry me for a while. It's good to rest the bod. My gashy shoulder hurts and my throat is sore from Froggy Girl's rope. Time to just relax and go for a ride.

My head is above water and I constantly spin myself around to make sure I ain't being hunted. I don't see a soul. Don't mean there ain't somebody watching, just means they ain't close enough for me to see them.

The sun is hot as shit and it starts to cook my head. I pull off my tank, which ain't easy to do when you're floating down a culvert stream, and wrap it around my skull so I don't get fried. Feels nice and cool.

The tunnel ninja bodies have washed up along the side of the culvert, caught on some sticks and shit, so I paddle over and pull myself up onto the concrete edge by them. The heat sucks at the water on my body and I figure I'll be bone dry in less than an hour the way the sun is cooking.

It takes me a couple of minutes to pull the bodies out of the water, but I'm glad I do. One of them has a sweet pocket knife in her black pants. Thumb-flipper kind. Sharp as shit. I tuck that away and search the other tunnel ninja, but she's got nothing on her. Well, except for her guts. She's got that shit all over her.

The tunnel ninjas aren't as old as Inez. They're older than Froggy Girl, but not by much. Maybe late teens? Early twenties? Younger than me. I think. Pa always celebrated my birthday, but it wasn't my real birthday. My sisters say they know my real birthday, but birthdays don't mean shit anymore. Why the hell would they? Ain't no cake left.

Done searching the bodies, I stand and stretch. Heat feels good on my bare skin. Got my shirt on my head, so my torso is all naked and shit. I keep stretching and turn around, ready to climb up out of the culvert.

"Hello," Inez says from the top of the concrete. She's got a few friends with her. They all have firearms. No more table leg clubs.

Well, shit.

Chapter Five

"You're a good actor," I say.

"Community theatre for ten years before the Zs showed up," Inez replies.

"You want me to clap, bitch?" I ask. "Because I ain't." I glare at her. "What you gonna do now?"

"It was supposed to be easier than this," Inez says.

"Why the hell would you think that?" I ask, crossing my arms. Not because I want to cover my bare tits, but because I'm annoyed and I cross my arms when I'm annoyed. I could give two fucks who's staring at my tits. Stare away, shitfuckers! "You saw me take down those Zs outside your place. With a fucking lamp. You think some living flesh is going to be harder? You're dumb as a Z if you think that."

"She's a strange one, Inez," one of the other women says. They are all women. All of them. The talking one has a shotgun aimed at my belly. "Too independent. Dangerous. We should leave her."

"No, Inez," Inez says. "She is a fit for us. I had hoped she would submit to Inez and we wouldn't have to be here."

Huh?

"Hold the shitfuck on," I say. "Which one of you is Inez?"

"We are," they all say together.

I do not like it when crazies talk like they're one person. Freaky shit. Super freaky.

I take my tank off my head and shake it. I make a long show of this, hoping all eyes are on the shirt. I glance up, but all eyes are on me, waiting. I put my tank on and give them a thumbs up.

"I'm leaving," I say as I clamber up the edge of the culvert and stand right in front of the first Inez. The one I met in the basement. Inez One. "You chicks is nuts and shit. Adios. That means goodbye in Spanish."

"No," Inez One says, a rifle in her hand, the barrel jammed into my hip as I try to squeeze by. "You are staying."

The others—all Inezes?—move in close and there's no way I'm getting out of here without taking a few down. I don't want to take any of them down. Too easy. Not fair for them.

"Take her knife," Inez One says. "And those bars. I shouldn't have let her have them."

"No, you shouldn't," Inez Two says, the one with the shotgun that spoke before.

A different Inez grabs my knife from my belt and I start to grab for her, but end up with six shotguns in my face. Okay, maybe not too easy. But not hard.

A stand of scrub brush rustles and two chicks dressed as tunnel ninjas walk out with Froggy Girl between them. They are helping her walk as she coughs and gags.

"She almost drown," one of the women says. "Barely got her out of the river in time."

I look behind me. "That's a river?" I laugh. "That's not a river."

"We call it a river," Inez Two says. "So it's a river."

"Whatever, Heather," I say.

"What? My name is not Heather," Inez Two says.

"It was a rhyme," I reply.

"Shitty rhyme," she spits back.

I shrug. "I don't make the rules."

"We should kill her," Inez Two insists. There are more than a couple agreeing voices. "She killed two Inezes and almost killed this one. We cannot take her with us."

"We will bring her around to our ways," Inez One says. "We always do. She can help take the town back."

I shake my head and Inez One frowns. Well, the bitch was already frowning, so I guess she scowls. Is that it? Scowl? Or is that something you wear on your head? No, that's a cowl. Right. Words. They're hard.

"You do not have a choice in this," Inez One says.

I snicker. It pisses her off.

"Stop that!" she yells and shoves me with the barrel of her rifle.

Looks like an AK-47 knock-off. Probably taken from one of the gun shops around here on Z-Day. Civilians don't know the difference. Doesn't matter. She won't keep it for long.

"Ow," I say and push the barrel away from me. Inez swings it back into place, which I knew she'd do, and I use the momentum to grab the rifle and wrench it out of the woman's hands.

I spin it around and have the tip of the barrel up Inez One's right nostril before anyone can even take a breath. Inez Two moves at me, her shotgun going for my head, but Inez One holds up a hand and she stops.

"I want to leave," I say. My voice is soft and sweet. Okay, it's not really, but I don't yell at her. No yelling from me means soft and sweet. "I am going to leave. That's what's going to happen. It's happening. Yes, it is. I am leaving. You all can fuck off and stay here. Do not follow me, do not try to take me down. You make a move and I kill you all."

"We have more guns!" Inez Two barks.

"Oh, shit, do you?" I laugh. "I give up."

The women are confused. None of them know who is calling the shots. Inez One is busy staring me in the face, ignoring the rifle barrel up her nose. Inez Two is trying to be a tough bitch and intimidate me. Neither of them are giving the others any help on how to act or what to do next. Chaos.

I like chaos.

"Listen up, bitches," I say loudly. "I can blow this bitch's head off and turn and kill half of you before you sorry sacks of shit even pull the first trigger. That's a bunch of dead bitches. Even if you get a shot off, you won't hit me because I know exactly which one of you is going to fire first and I already have my sights set on you."

They all twitch and shuffle their feet. A few of them look around as if they can figure out who I've pegged as the first shooter. No way for any of them to do that because I'm full of shit. How the fuck would I know who is going to shoot first? All I care about is taking down as many as possible in the first second before I dive to the ground and let them tear each other apart.

Which is exactly what they'll do. There are a couple of other rifles, but mostly shotguns. I hit the dirt and they pull those triggers? Inez soup is all that will be left.

"If any of you fire, you'll hit one of our own," Inez One says.

Dammit, she ain't completely stupid. Ruins all the fun.

She focuses back on me and tries to smile. It's worse than when I try to fake smile. I made a little girl cry for two days with nightmares when I fake smiled at her back at the Stronghold. Her mom still won't talk to me.

"Put the rifle down, please," Inez One says. "Then we can talk."

"If I put this down then one of your freaky clones is gonna blast me," I say.

"We aren't clones," Inez Two snaps. "None of us even look the same."

"Those two do," I say and point at two chicks standing by the edge of the group. They really do look the same.

"They're twins!" Inez Two shouts. Man, she gets angry fast.

"Oh," I say. "Well they should color their hair or something so they don't look so much alike. It's confusing."

"This woman is insane," Inez Two says to Inez One. "Let's blast her and—"

Her forehead explodes all over me. Blood, brains, bone. It just splatters across my face and I start spitting out gunk as I hit the ground. The sound of the gunshot reaches me just as I reach the dirt. Then a whole bunch of gunshots ring out and I cover my head as more brains and blood spray everywhere.

The Inezes are screaming their heads off, the ones that still got their heads, and running this way and that. Dumb broads. They should have just dropped to the ground. Better chance at living. The gunshots continue, the screams start to go away. When there is only a few sobbing Inezes left, I lift my head to see the damage.

"Shitfuck me," I say as I stare into an Inez's lifeless eyes. She got a bullet through the neck and it tore her voice box right out. I can see through her throat and out the back of her spine, which ain't there no more. "Damn."

"El!" Steph yells from far off. "You good?"

I lift my hand and give her a thumbs up. Makes me think of Long Pork.

I feel footsteps, but barely hear them as my sisters sprint from their hides to get me. I'm already up on my feet when Antoinette reaches me and gives me a big hug.

"You hurt?" she asks.

"All good," I say. "But they ain't."

I turn in a circle and look at the dead. Most were taken out with one shot, some with two. Out of all the Inezes, only three are still alive. One of them is Inez One, the dumb bitch that thought she could trick me. I kneel next to her and slap her on the cheek. Her eyes turn to me and try to focus, but there's really just pain left in there. Half her right shoulder is no more. Goodbye, right shoulder.

She's bleeding out fast.

"Why?" she asks. "You could have joined us. We didn't want to kill you."

I pick up her rifle and show it to her.

"These are for women, not girls playing at army," I say. "You pointed them at the wrong sister and paid the stupid price. Next time, just ask a bitch if she wants to join your crazy Inez club. I'd have said no and there wouldn't have been any hard feelings."

"Or mass murder," Audrey says as she comes up to us.

"You okay?" Steph asks, following right behind Audrey.

"I'm okay," I say. Inez One ain't breathing anymore. Bye bye, Inez.

The second Inez still living tries crawling away, but Audrey puts a .45 slug into her back and she doesn't do no more crawling. That just leaves one Inez.

"Help me," a weak voice pleads from a few feet away.

"Froggy Girl," I say and move to her. She's got a gunshot wound to her left bicep, but that's all. "You'll live."

"Don't leave me," she cries as I start to walk away. She's boring and she ain't gonna live on her own anyway. "I won't survive out here. Not with the Doyles everywhere."

"The Doyles? What the hell are the Doyles?" Steph asks. She puts a boot toe against Froggy Girl's arm and the chick pisses herself right there. "Jesus."

"I got this, I got this," I say and push Steph out of the way. "You gotta be gentle."

I grab Froggy Girl by the shoulders and shake her ass hard.

"Who the fuck are the Doyles?" I shout in her face.

She screeches and tries to get away from me, but she ain't gonna be able to do that. Even without a shot arm, she ain't even close to my league.

"Doyles," I snarl, my nose almost touching hers. "Who the fuck are they?"

"Men," she says. "They're like us, but men. A lot more of them than us. We've been fighting for years. They find us and take—"

"Why does this matter?" Steph asks. "Gut her and let's go. We don't have time for crazies, El. We have to track those kids."

"The kids?" Froggy Girl asks, her eyes shifting from mine to Steph's. I don't think she likes what she sees, so she looks back to me. "Blind kids? A couple deaf ones?"

"Yeah," I say. "You know them?"

"I know where they're hiding," she says. "They ran into the Doyles and messed a couple of them up, but they got away. The men have been hunting them for days."

"She's full of shit," Steph says. "The kids are probably long gone by now."

"No, no!" Froggy Girl cries. "They aren't! The Doyles have the town sealed off. No way for anyone to get in or out."

"We got in," Audrey says.

"Easy," Antoinette says. "Except for all the Zs."

"The Zs," Froggy Girl says. "The Doyles control the Zs. If you ran into trouble with the undead, it's because the Doyles sent them after you."

"Did they now," Steph says and crouches next to me and Froggy Girl. "How the hell did they do that?"

"They've been training them," Froggy Girl says. "Like dogs. They use fresh meat to make them go where they want then ring a bell. Anytime the Zs hear that bell, they start shuffling that way."

"And you just let them do that?" Antoinette asks. "Why not kill them? Or leave?"

"Too many Doyles," Froggy Girl sighs. "Always too many Doyles. They hunt us too. Use us as the fresh meat and other things. Some of us tried to escape the town, but the Doyles found them and…"

"We get it," Antoinette says. She smacks her rifle and gives Steph a nudge. "Rapists. Killers. Z users. I think we should check these Doyles out."

"Forget the Doyles," Steph says. "We find the kids. They're why we're here. Stick to the mission."

"Our job is not to save the wasteland," Audrey agrees. "We go find those damn kids."

"Doyles will find you first," Froggy Girl says. "They're on their way now. You made too much noise. They'll be here any second."

I look over at Steph, but she's busy glaring at Froggy Girl. I look up at Antoinette and she gives me an exaggerated frown.

"Where's Marcie?" I ask.

"Overwatch," Audrey says. "She's got the Barrett covering our asses."

"Call her," I say. "See what else she sees. Tell her to look for Doyles."

"What the hell do Doyles look like?" Audrey asks.

"Men," I say. "You know what men look like. Cock and balls and shit."

"You got the shit part right," Audrey laughs. She pulls out her radio and walks off so we can keep talking to Froggy Girl. Nice of her.

"You know where these kids are?" Steph asks.

"Yes," Froggy Girl says. "I'll take you there. But we have to go back into the tunnels. The Doyles stay out of the tunnels."