Young Annabelle (9 page)

When we got home, I went to my room to see if
my cell phone was finished charging. I turned it on and it beeped
several times, telling me I’d received five text messages while I
was gone.

Who sent me messages?

TIGER sent you a message! (4)

Jenna sent you a message! (1)

I felt like I was about to have a mini heart
attack when I saw ‘Tiger’ on my screen. I was so confused. I’d told
myself that I was no longer interested in that douche – who dared
to flirt with that attention-whore Donna right in front of me, as
if I didn’t exist. He was supposed to be ‘so whatever!’ from now
on.

My body dared to disagree with my mind. It
shivered in anticipation of discovering what he wrote to me. I
resisted the urge and tapped on Jenna’s message first. Her text was
probably going to be funny and I needed funny and lightheartedness
before delving into more pressing matters that concerned my
sanity.

From: Jenna

My dad’s kur-azy! He ordered special
t-shirts for my swim meets. Jenna’s Dad, arrow pointing up. And 1
for mom 2! Think I can get away with telling everyone we’re not
related? Bitch you better answer me! Laters

Okay, that didn’t exactly help. In fact, it
made me depressed knowing that her parents cared enough about her
to get lame t-shirts made. They were proud of their daughter and
weren’t afraid to show it. Maybe Mom would get custom shirts made
if I managed to lose twenty-five pounds – my first achievement.

‘
My daughter lost twenty-five pounds and
I’m so proud!’

I laughed, thinking about my mom walking
around the neighborhood proudly sporting the t-shirt, a huge grin
on her face.

That feels better!

I had a new smile on my face that I
desperately needed before diving into James’ texts. I tapped on his
name. Four messages popped up, one after the other.

From: TIGER 6:00pm

Hey you there?

That’s it?
Yes I’m here! But I’m gonna
need a bit more than that if you want me to text back,
DOUCHE!

From: TIGER 6:28pm

R u ignoring me? Because of Donna? Fireball,
you know it wasn’t like that!

I shook my head. Wrong again.

First of all, it wasn’t
entirely
about Donna; second of all,
you’re a spoiled little brat who thinks his shit doesn’t stink.
Some of us have to work, unlike you.

From: TIGER 6:46pm

Fireball! Don’t ignore me :( It was nothing.
We were just talking about nothing

Then why was she blushing like you just told
her something dirty? I’m not stupid!

I mouthed ‘Whatever’ to the screen and move
to the next message.

From: TIGER 7:25pm

Wow, so its gonna be like that huh!

What the hell did he want from me!

He was the one who walked away from me!

Yeah, so I’d told him I had to get back to
work, but he didn’t have to agree right away and return to the
attention-whore!

Not cool!

I tapped ‘reply’ on the newest message; I was
going to give him a piece of my mind.

From: Me 7:45pm

Thats right its gonna be like that. I don’t
owe u anything. We don’t even know each other! Get over yourself,
it wasn’t about DONNA! Some of us aren’t as lucky as you, we still
have to work! Remember that the next time you decide to gloat!

I pressed ‘send’ and threw the phone onto my
bed.

Boom! That’s what’s up, douchebag!

Beep! Beep!

If I was honest with myself, I was a bit
scared to pick up my phone, like it would burn me if I touched
it.

New Message from TIGER!

I reluctantly opened his text.
Here goes
nothing.

From: TIGER 7:47pm

Oh yeah! U need to have your ears checked, I
didn’t gloat! Weren’t you the one who tried to lock lips with me?
Stop lying to urself. It was about Donna, jealous I was talking to
her and not you :) From your hot studded fantasy

Oh my god, he did
not
just write that! I almost kissed
him?! Is he kidding?
I’m not jealous!

I threw my phone back onto my bed, it bounced
and landed on my pillow. My body felt like it was in flames. I
struggled out of my sweater and whipped it across the room. It
didn’t make me feel any better.

I grabbed my black sweater from my closet;
its zippered pockets were perfect for carrying my iPod. I shoved my
arms through the sleeves and placed my iPod in the pocket, pulling
out my headphones as I closed my bedroom door behind me.

“I’m going biking!” I yelled from the front
door.

“You’re going to exercise?!” Mom exclaimed
from the basement. “That’s wonderful, Annabelle, I’m so proud of
you!”

Maybe some exercise will help clear my
mind!

August 21
^st,
2012

“Go Jenna!” I screamed from the top of the
bleachers at the Royal Heights High pool.

It had been three whole weeks since I last
saw or spoke with James.

Like I care!
I
reminded myself, turning my attention back to the mock swim
meet. The team’s first competition was scheduled for the end of
September. Jenna had quit the club a week ago to focus on the new
training schedule.

She is so getting that
scholarship!

I beamed like a proud parent as Jenna brought
it home for her relay team, finishing off her freestyle with a
quick tap on the wall. Losing her at work and pretending not to
care about James’ absence had turned working at the club into true
torture. I couldn’t wait to finish at the end of the summer.

Like I care if I see his – very
cute – ass anymore… I’m a fraud!
I shook my head and laughed at the
realization.

Damn it.
I exhaled a long, slow breath. I thought
my body and mind had reached an understanding, but thoughts of
James had been plaguing me since he left. I’d been tormented by
these stupid, inexplicable feelings every time my mind drifted to
something even remotely linkable to him.

Need a boyfriend. Like, now!

What was happening to me? All of a sudden I’d
become a desperate horn-dog! Maybe I’d have a boyfriend able to
suppress these out-of-control feelings if people weren’t always on
my ass about my appearance, destroying any remnant of confidence I
possessed. How could I snag a man if I never believed I was good
enough?

According to Jenna, I was cute. And I was
sure there was a guy out there who wouldn’t mind his girl having a
little junk in the trunk.

I’m sure he’s out there…somewhere…

The buzzer rang loudly, signally that the
meet was over. I looked down the bottom of the bleachers; Jenna’s
parents were sitting with the other parents, all abuzz with
excitement.

A pang of jealously shot through me as I
watched her parents’ mirth. They were wearing the t-shirts her dad
had ordered: his in blue, hers in pink. Her dad jumped from his
seat to enthusiastically applaud his daughter’s victory.

“Yeah! Jenna, my girl!” He fist-pumped the
air then nudged his wife to join in on his embarrassing display of
affection.

Jenna’s mom laughed and put her arm up in a
haphazard attempt at a fist-pump. He laughed and grabbed her arm,
shaking it to match his own excitement. As soon as he released her
arm, she dropped it to her side, shaking her head at the mother
seated beside her.

“I can’t bring him anywhere,” she smiled,
unashamed. This was an everyday thing for her and she clearly loved
him for it.

I let out another long breath and headed down
the bleachers. As I passed Jenna’s parents, they told me to tell
Jenna not to take an hour to change. I chuckled, knowing exactly
what they meant.

“I’ll try,” I promised and headed into the
hall to the alternate entrance to the change rooms. That was the
only way I could enter because I had street shoes on.

“Fireball?”

I froze.

Nervousness consumed my body. I was only
‘Fireball’ to one person. I hesitantly turned around. James was
walking down the hallway towards me. His dark hair, normally so
messy, was damp and slicked back. He’d obviously just had a
shower.

Do not go there! Annabelle, for
Christ’s sake, do
not
go there… Shower…James…God!

My mouth went as dry as the Sahara as he
came closer. With his hair combed back, I could see more of his
beautiful –
stop it!
– face,
and his green eyes…
Damn!

Why does he have to be so good
looking?

I had to calm down or he’d think I was some
jittering freak.

“Hey,” I said nonchalantly – or did my best
to, at least.

Play it cool, don’t let him see he affects
you, at all.

“What are you doing here, come to watch me
practice?” He smirked and folded his arms across his
tightly-shirted chest.

Sigh... I mean, hell
no!

Shaking out of the brief imagining of muscles
and how his tight shirt would look so much better on the ground, I
took a step back and did my best to seem bewildered at the audacity
of his claim.

“You need to get over yourself,” I
scowled.

“Why would I? I don’t see you running away.
Guess you’re not as offended as you think you are,” James stated
smugly.

My light brown eyes widened at his comment.
“What!”

“Be honest, you miss me!” He smirked again,
taking a step closer.

“I don’t!” I took another step back, keeping
the distance between us.

“Then why are you here? It’s still summer,
beautiful. School doesn’t start for another few weeks.” His grin
got wider, thinking he’d got me.

Something about the way he gazed down at me
made me melt. Calling me ‘beautiful’ had sent me over the edge.

I’m beautiful!
I gushed silently, feeling a
joy reserved only for Christmas and birthdays.

Be on your guard, girl. He knows what he’s
doing!

I tried to shake it off, realizing he
probably thought he had me in his pocket. I leaned towards him.

“I’m here to see my best friend swim in a
mock meet,” I explained. “So go screw yourself!”

His jaw clenched tightly and the warmth in
his green eyes seeped away, leaving a stony coolness.

“I wish I could, but it’s usually better if
there’s two people doing it,” James responded, his smile no longer
reaching his eyes.

Don’t fall for it; he’s playing you!

I stood silently. It took me a moment to
register the words pouring out of his –
sigh –
beautiful mouth. Then, like lightening, it all
came crashing down, making sense.

Was he…did he mean us?
Doing
it
?!
Like together?

I felt my cheeks slowly turning crimson.

“I’ve got to go,” I muttered, swallowing my
heart back down. I hoped he didn’t notice how uncomfortable I
suddenly was.

James nodded, his expression unchanging. My
body felt incredibly drunk; my brain, too incapacitated to send a
signal down to my sluggish legs to turn and walk away.

Thankfully, it didn’t last. I slowly regained
control and pushed into the girls’ change room. I stopped between
the outer and inner doors, resting against the wall for a moment as
I composed myself. My heart rate needed to slow way down if I had
any hope of forgetting what just happened, especially if I had to
explain it to Jenna.

There was a mirror with a counter along one
wall of the little hallway between the two doors. My closed eyes
faced the mirror, preparing to check my reflection to see how bad
the damage was. If it was anything like how I felt at that moment,
it would not be good. But, I was ever hopeful.

Please…not a
disaster!

Carefully, I opened my eyes. All I saw was
red.

I was literally
red
.

Shit!

I was horrified as I examined the shade of my
cheeks. Thankfully, my hair was fine except for the beads of sweat
that threatened to ruin the flat-ironing job I’d put my long
strands through this morning.

Jesus!
I could walk twenty minutes in the
blistering heat then sit in the sauna-like pool area, and not sweat
like I was now.

What is he doing to me?! It’s like I’ve
never see a cute – okay, really hot – guy before!

I shook my head; I was confused at my body’s
weird reaction to him. I wiped the beads of sweat off my forehead
and stared at my reflection. My pupils looked dilated – honestly, I
looked like I’d just gone through the biggest shock of my life.

You know why you feel like
this,
I explain to
myself,
’cause
he brought up having sex with him.

I clung to the counter for support, trying to
control my breathing. The thought of doing anything like that with
James was sending my body into sweaty tremors.

The sound of excitement and shouting come
from beyond the inner door.

Jenna!
I suddenly remembered why I was here. I
threw off the lust-filled tremors and glanced at the mirror one
last time. My cheeks had regained some of their original
color.

I pushed open the door to look for Jenna and
congratulate her.

******

It was late afternoon by the time Jenna and
her parents left the school for a celebratory dinner. They’d
invited me to come but I graciously declined, telling them I had to
eat at home tonight. I didn’t mention that Mom would blow a gasket
if I had dinner at a restaurant for the second time this month. As
far as she was concerned, the pass day was a one-time indulgence.
And she had made it irritatingly clear how much she regretted it
every day of the past three weeks, always complaining that she
didn’t understand how she’d let it happen.