You Can't Help Who You Love (4 page)

Halee

I was at home, cleaning up and twerking my ass all over the fucking place. I bet y’all like ‘White girl can dance?’ Well HELL yea, my lil ass can dance. Put some of y’all black girls to shame too. But anyways, I was waiting on Marquis’ ass to slide through. He wanted to come chill and I wasn’t going to turn his ass down. Both of my parents were at work, like always. They were never here and after the talk we just had the other day, I had no other choice but to deal with the shit. After I cleaned up, I went and took a nice shower. Just in case we take it to the next level with shit, I had to be prepared.

I was listening to Tony Braxton, singing along with her. Lol! I bet y’all like what the fuck, white girl be on it. Well yeah, I do actually. Shit, I get this shit from Miracle. After I got out of the shower, I headed in my closet and tried finding something cute to wear, not trying to look like I did it on purpose. Well, just something to catch his attention. After I did that, I straightened my jet black hair and did my make-up. I was cute, nonetheless. I didn’t need half of the shit that I had. I could rock a face with no make-up and some around the house clothes and probably be able to take y’alls man.

Ha! But yeah, anyways, after I did all that, I lit a blunt of loud and heard the doorbell ringing. I knew it wasn’t nobody but Marquis, so I skipped downstairs to open the door. I swung it open and there he stood, looking like he belonged on the front of a fucking magazine and shit. I blushed at his ass before passing him the blunt. I led him back upstairs to my room, which looked like a mini apartment.

“Damn, this shit is laid out,” he said, looking around at my room. He didn’t have to tell me what I already knew. I was conceited as fuck; I knew I was the shit and couldn’t a bitch alive bring me off my square. Fuck that. My self-esteem higher than someone’s mother’s rent. I decided that we would watch some movies. He was straight with that, so I popped in Love and Basketball. It was my favorite movie of all times.

“What yo ass know about that?” he asked me, cocking his head.

“Niggaaaaaa, I know all about this shit. I loved their relationship. It was so cute. He did some fucked up shit, but who doesn’t?” I asked him, shrugging my shoulders. Right when we snuggled up, my doorbell started ringing like crazy. I don’t have nobody coming here, my parents have a key, and I know damn well that Miracle’s ass ain’t ringing it like that, so I glared at him before stomping my foot in a pair on Timbs. I skipped downstairs two at a time because I know whoever it was on the outside of the door wanted some problems, and I was going to give their asses exactly that.

I swung the door open and saw none other than the girl I punched at the mall, Marquis’ baby mother. I wasted no time as I jumped on her ass like a lion protecting its prey. I wasn’t feeling that shit. I don’t bother nobody, so ain’t a muthafucking soul gone fuck with me. Point blank, period. I was literally beating this girl beyond recognition before I felt four more hands going in on my ass! This bitch had come with a crew and they were jumping my ass.

“What the fuck! Get off of her; what the fuck is wrong with y’all bitches!” I heard Quis yelling. They didn’t let up on me, so I heard one loud smack and figured he had popped off on one of their asses, in which he did.

“Oh hell nah!” some girl, whom I never seen in my fucking life, yelled. She and the other girl, who called themselves double teaming me, started jumping on him. I took this as my time to fuck up his baby mama. This bitch would think twice before she followed someone to my fucking house. What the fuck is wrong with bitches these days?

“Halee! What the hell!” I heard the voice that belonged to Miracle. I paused and looked up at her as she immediately threw down her bag and helped Quis out. I bet, to a stranger walking by, you would’ve thought some crazy shit. They had finally had enough. The two girls who jumped me started backing away, as the bitch, whose name I learned was Toya, was screaming all kinds of shit at Quis. I took that as the time to grab my best friend and walk in the house. I wasn’t mad at Quis because I see this bitch really is off her shit.

“What the fuck happened? I’m on my way to go pop up on Dallas, who by the way isn’t fucking with me, to see y’all out this bitch having an all-out brawl!” Miracle yelled.

“Girl, I don’t know! One minute we about to watch a movie, the next minute, those bitches ringing my doorbell like they’re the fucking police. So, I politely took my ass outside and read that bitch her rights, so then her girls started jumping me while I’m beating her ass. Quis comes out and hits one of them because he tried to break it up and they didn’t stop hitting me. So, they start jumping on him and, poof, there you came. And why the hell isn’t Dallas talking to you?” I asked her.

I had my blunt lit again and I was unbothered like a muthafucka. That little kid shit didn’t bother me at all because I know what my hands do, so it’s whatever. One thing I didn’t like was the fact that if he was fucking with me, then he needed to check her and let her know she couldn’t come fucking with me. Because every time she came for me, I was beating that ass. I don’t care who liked it or didn’t. If they couldn’t get with the shit, then they could most definitely get LOST. She was about to tell me something, but in walked Quis, looking like he had the weight of the world on his shoulder.

“Sis, call me if you need me. Y’all need to talk,” she said, gathering her things so she could leave. I sat there, waiting on him to say something, I didn’t feel like I had shit to say. Hell, she came to my house fucking with me, so I defended myself on my property.

“You ain’t have to go all out like that Halee,” he started. I stopped his ass right then.

“Hold on, let me correct you. I went all out because that bitch came to my house with that bs, so I went off. Fuck that, if you looking for an apology, you can exit stage left too cause it ain’t happening,” I said, keeping shit 1k. I wasn’t apologizing for shit because wasn’t shit wrong with nothing I did. Like I said, he could leave if he didn’t like it.

“Man, this bitch talking about putting child support on me and shit, all because I’m not fucking with her no more. But it’s cool, I’m not mad at you; you handled yours. You and the little firecracker, Miracle,” he said, smirking. I didn’t say a word as he came over and kissed my lips all soft and shit. I slightly turned my head because I wanted him to know I was pissed. I broke my fucking nail fighting those Amazon ass bitches. I should’ve just pistol whipped one of their asses. That shit would’ve scared their asses straight. Bet their asses won’t follow nobody else though.

All that shit had me amped up, but watching him stand there pacing the floor had me wet like a fucking tsunami. Right when I was doing my slow walk over to him, in walk the fucking maid. The way she was eyeing Quis had me wanting to run one with her ass too, but I let the shit ride.

“Let’s postpone this movie night and let me head my ass to check in at the trap,” he told me. I simply nodded my head before giving him a kiss on the cheek. After he left, I didn’t feel like being bothered at all by anyone, so I headed to my room. I checked my phone and saw Miracle texted me, telling me they were having a cookout Friday and to be dressed to impress. She said that shit like I never do. I told her of course I would be there and dozed off. I was tired as hell.

Miracle

Pulling up to Dallas’ condo had my nerves jittery as hell. I saw that his car was in the garage, so besides being jittery, I was relieved that he was home and not elsewhere. “He better not be in here on no fuck shit either,” I said to myself. After I gathered my thoughts, I exited my car, making sure to hit my locks twice. Before I could knock, he swung the door open. He looked so good; I had to erase the thoughts that was in the back of my mind. All I wanted to do was ride his ass like a bull at the county fair. “Hey,” I said, staring in his eyes. He looked surprised to see me, but he may as well get used to this shit.

“What’s up?” he replied, opening the door to let me in.

“Didn’t mean to pop up unexpected and shit, I just came by to see why you was ignoring me,” I told him, sitting down on his couch.

“Nah, it ain’t that,” he told me, looking at the floor.

“Then, what it is then?” I asked him, cocking my head. I felt an attitude coming on.

“Nothing M, what’s up though? I was just on my way out.” he said, finally looking at me. I looked at his attire and could tell that his ass was lying. I instantly regretted coming over.

“Ok, well I’ll see you later,” I said, walking to the door, hoping he would stop me, but he didn’t. I made my mind up that if he didn’t want me, I wasn’t going to push myself on him. Fuck it.

Carter

What’s up? I’m probably all late and shit. Y’all probably know all about me through Miracle’s ass, huh? No? Aight, well let me tell y’all about ME. I’m Carter, the most realist nigga outchea. Lol, nah foreal, let me stop. I’m 21 and Miracle’s second oldest brother. I didn’t play about my sister. She was my baby, my fuckin heartbeat. Shit, a nigga’s world all in one. We cherish her because she was a miracle. Hence, the name. My mother died giving birth to her. It was either her or the baby and let my pops tell it, moms all but made him promise to choose Miracle over her, and that’s some real shit to me. Had it not have been for her and her decision, my little baby wouldn’t be here.

Anyways, I slang work and help throw out a few orders underneath my father. Lately, he had been talking about leaving the game, and I want to leave a good impression on him. Though he was my father, all that daddy-son shit go out the window when we in the streets. He didn’t want anyone thinking he showed favoritism and I didn’t blame him for that. That’s just real. But anyways, I knew he would be choosing who he handed shit over to and though I knew nine times out of ten, it would go to Justin, I just wanted to prove to him that I had what it took also to get shit done.

Nah, I don’t have no kids. Shit, I don’t have no girl, but I do have my eyes on someone. It was Halee, Miracle’s best friend. I’ve always had a thing for her white black ass. I mean, foreal. We had a small fling a few years back, but that was it. I couldn’t fuck with her because at the time, she was younger than me and being in a relationship was something I wasn’t quite ready for at the time. She the most trillest fucking white girl I have ever met. She wasn’t afraid of shit and shawty could cook any beef that was brought to her. She crossed my mind because I was leaving pops when I saw Marquis’ ass heading there. I wasn’t jealous or no shit like that, but I didn’t like it. I didn’t trip because I knew no matter what or who she fucked with, she would always choose me. So, I would let her have her fun for now, I guess.

I was heading to this little freak bitch I met at the mall earlier; her name was Michaela. She was bad. Not as bad as Halee, but she would have to do for now. She stood at 5’4”, thick little jant. The only thing I didn’t like was she was ratchet as shit. But hell, she was from the hood, so I would bet my bottom dollar she knew how to blow on some wood. Shit, majority of the hood hoes knew how to suck a mean dick. I chuckled to myself as I thought about it.

When I pulled up to the address she sent me, it was too many folks on the porch and too many cars outside, leading me to believe either she stayed with these folks or she was having a party. Either way, I wasn’t taking the chance of getting robbed or any of that shit. Y’all know half of these hood hoes wasn’t trustworthy; they’ll set ya ass up in a minute. Not only that, but I wasn’t planning on wifing this bitch, so I didn’t need all the extras in my business.

I rode right on by, bumping The Game and Dej Loaf’s song Ryda. This song reminded me so much of Halee until it was crazy. I know shawty would always have my back. I was fighting with myself day in and day out to be honest with the both of us and tell her how I felt for her, but I couldn’t do it and I don’t even know why. Now, two years later, she even badder than she was back then. She was popping foreal. I headed back to my pop’s crib, thinking about her little ass the entire way. Something had to give and soon.

Miracle.

It’s been damn near four days since I last talked to Dallas and I haven’t heard from his ass yet. The shit kind of got me annoyed, but now I see how we are rocking. It’s cool; I like a little play time. Tomorrow was the day that we were having our little cookout and I had already invited someone from high school who always liked me, (I didn’t like him, he was more so just a front). I wanted to show Dallas I would be fine without his ass. It’s crazy because the feelings that I had developed for him are real and now that he was pushing me to the side, I wanted to show him that he could EASILY be replaced. Like K Michelle said, I need another one to get over the other one. And I was doing exactly that.

Anyways, the guy I chose to come to the cookout name was Cashmere, aka Cash. He was fine and all that, but he wasn’t Dallas. I don’t know what it was, but I liked Dallas on a whole different level. Halee and I were heading out to find us some swimsuits and I knew I had to be popping if I wanted to capture Dallas’ attention. We went into the mall and came out with so many different swimsuits, until it was a shame.

We jumped right back in her car and blasted the music all the way up; we were jamming to Lucci’s song, Many Men. I heard this song through my brothers and I loved it, especially when he said ‘I sleep with that two three with me, I’ll put a hole in a nigga for fucking with me.’ It reminded me so much of my brothers. I couldn’t help but fall in love with the song. Halee’s ass changed the song and started twerking in her seat to some wild, crazy song that I really didn’t understand the lyrics to. But I was jigging right along with her ass.

We made it home and rushed to my room to try on the swimsuits; we already saw one another naked, so that wasn’t an issue. And plus, we both knew we loved dick. So shit, it didn’t bother me to see her naked body and vice versa. She stepped out in an all-black onesie and hunnnny, it was fitting! She matched it up with a sheer pink coatlike thing and I must admit, it was cute.

“Don’t try on anymore, that one is just fine! It’s really cute on your little tan ass!” I told her. I looked at myself in the mirror and fell in love with the royal blue two-piece swimsuit I had on. I was glad my body was in shape because if I had a pudge of unwanted fat anywhere, we were going to have a problem. But my body was PERFECT. I paired it with a wraparound waist piece and it was cute. After we decided on those, we called the hair salon, 1102, to schedule a hair appointment. We knew nine times out of ten that we would have to get it done again the day after, but that was all fine and dandy between us. We settled down in my room, turned on my iPhone and iHome and started vibing to Tink. Her song, Bonnie and Clyde, was life to me. I listened to it damn near every day. I had no complaints. We were both twisting up blunts, about to get lit. No words needed to be spoken as we let the words sink us in and the blunts take us away.

*****

The day had arrived and I was heading out of the house, so I could meet Halee at the hair salon. Today, I wanted something different and I knew she did too. I was racking my brain the entire way trying to figure out what I wanted done to my head. I was thinking just get a blow out and rock my real hair. Just because I rocked weave didn’t mean I was a bald headed bitch because I was far from that. So, when it was my turn in the chair, I instructed the hair slayer to take the hair out and just give me a blowout. When I spun my chair around and saw the finished look, I was fully satisfied. My real hair was longer than I remembered. I guess it was the sew-in. I thanked her with a hefty tip after I paid and sat to wait on Halee.

When she stepped out with a fresh cut bob, I almost didn’t recognize her ass. She had gotten her hair dyed red, not burgundy, but red red and it was gorgeous on her! She was indeed to turn heads with this one! We complimented one another and headed back to the car.

“Girl, I’m so ready to see Quis. I can’t lie; I’m feeling his little thuggish ass!” she vented and that was different. Halee never been the type to want to settle, but now that I’m hearing this, I knew rather sooner than later it was coming. I couldn’t blame her because in all honesty, if Dallas had his shit together, then I would’ve been on the same shit. But whatever. We headed to go pick up Cash and that’s another thing I didn’t like about him, how he wanting to be a hot boy... when he didn’t even have a fucking car. I wasn’t throwing slams, but damn.  It’s a turn off when the nigga I’m bringing to the family house claim to have shit and to be the shit, but not have shit to show for it. I sighed and shook my head as I turned into his driveway. He came running out with a knapsack, I’m sure his trunks and what not were in.

“Hey beautiful,” he said, trying to kiss me. I turned my head though, I didn’t need him thinking the shit was ok and trying it in front of my family. They wouldn’t hesitate to barbecue his little ass.

“Y’all ready to turn up?” he asked us. Neither of us said anything. Halee knew why he was here. I didn’t want him feeling any type of way.

“Yeah, turn up!” I said, giving off my fake laugh. The entire way back we vibed to Boosie. When I pulled my car in the yard, Halee and I spotted both Quis and Dallas’ cars. My heart started skipping beats, but I promised myself I wouldn’t let him see me sweat. They were all posted up outside, so I waited until Cash’s slow ass had all of his things, so we could walk in the house hand and hand. Yeah, I know that I was petty, but I didn’t give any fucks! Play with my emotions, I’ll play with yours! Only, I’ll do it better than it’s ever been done.

“What’s up baby sis?” Both Justin and Carter gave me hugs like they hadn’t seen me today. I knew they were just checking out Cash. Quis and Dallas walked over, so I grabbed Cash’s hand and we sped off to my room with Halee behind us.

“Wait, sit out here. Let us get dressed and we will be back!” I said to him. I was ready to slide in this swimsuit. I knew, without a doubt, that today was going to be eventful as hell, and I couldn’t wait.