You Are a Medium: Discover Your Natural Abilities to Communicate With the Other Side (14 page)

‘”Hair was important in my family.” Kareem told me. “You

couldn’t go out looking anything but the best. Didn’t matter where

you went, the grocery store, the post office, people would look and
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talk. I did my grandmother, my mother, my aunts and even the

neighbor’s hair. I was good. The women loved it, but the men not

so much. I was teased and called all kinds of names. I was a gay boy.

It was very obvious. I knew it and everyone else did too.”

Kareem took a breath and went on. “From a young age I was

one of those flamboyant types. I liked to wear bright colors, take

dance lessons and be me. My dad didn’t like this at all. He was

embarrassed. The whole family had a hard time with who I was. I

knew I had to leave. I didn’t have too much of a choice. I am who I am.”

In Los Angeles Kareem became a popular make-up artist. He

eventually went to England with an actress that he worked for. Even though he grew up cutting and styling his families hair, it was there that he took his first classes in hair styling. He loved it and continued his studies in Italy. Eventually he switched over to doing hair full time. Kareem told me a few funny stories from his travels and

then asked me what I did. He had been so self-disclosing that I felt it only fair of me to return his honesty. I told him that I was a psychic and a medium. We talked for a few minutes about my work

and he realized that a friend of his had a reading with me not too

long ago.

“That’s right.” He said. “My friend told me how you talked to

his mother who passed a few years ago. He never thought that she

approved of him. I am glad that he went to you. He was a lot like

me. We just did not fit in. Not in our families, not in school, not in church. I used to think that God had made some awful kind of mistake plopping me in the middle of rural North Carolina.”

“Well, you might be surprised how people change once they go

over.” I manage to slip this in as he talks.

“It’s not just angels playing the harp, is it?” He said. “Not like the preacher made us think. You know my grand-daddy was a preacher,

used to be at the tabernacle just up the road in north Durham. I

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wonder what he must be thinking now. He thought I was over the

top then. Lord he should see me now.”

As I am listening to Kareem and enjoying his friendly conversa-

tion, I look into the large mirror in front of the chair where I am sitting. I want to see the progress in my hair, but instead I see an older African American woman with a big smile staring back at me.

“I think that someone from your family is here.” I tell Kareem.

“I just saw an older thin woman with white hair tied up in a bun

in the mirror. I hear the name Elena, Elaine or something similar.”

“Oh, that’s my aunt Ellen. She was my mother’s sister.” Kareem

looks surprised.

Instead of shutting down this psychic intrusion, I gently allow

Kareem’s aunt’s presence to get stronger. The image that I see of her in the mirror is so vivid, I am intrigued.

“She has a big smile. I get the impression from her that she was

depressed before she passed over. She says that she is happy now.” I tell him.

Kareem stops cutting my hair and stares into the mirror. “She

was always so quiet. We all knew she was depressed. Never mar-

ried and never went out much. I always wanted to know her better.

But, she was quiet. She is the last person I would expect to pay me a visit.”

“She wants you to know that she is with you quite a bit. I am

getting images of different places. I see you laughing having fun.

She is with you, enjoying traveling and new experiences. Your

laughter is helping her. “

Kareem, staring at the mirror says. “You mean she has been fol-

lowing me around in spirit? Why?”

“Your aunt is telling me that she is learning from you. She says

that she is making up for lost time. I get the image of a bedroom. I see her sitting there in a rocking chair just staring out the window.

Not doing anything. I feel that her self-expression was stifled.” I tell
92 ~ Conformity and Breaking Free

Kareem. “My impression is that within her there was a very sensi-

tive artistic soul that she did not know how to let out.”

“That would be her bedroom.” He tells me. “She would just sit

there, in her rocking chair staring out the window.”

Kareem’s aunt begins to send me different images. “I see her

dancing and painting in the spirit realm. She is learning new things.

She says you are an inspiration.”

Kareem looks at me in a more serious way. “Being different in

my family was not easy. We all were expected to go to the same

church, marry and settle down close to home. When I came out as

gay, my father stopped talking to me. I had to leave home. It is only now many years after his passing that I feel like I can come home. I understand my Aunts depression. I wish her the best.”

I look at the wall on the clock and I had been sitting in Kareem’s

chair for an hour and a half. My hair is much shorter than I wanted.

As I get ready to leave, Kareem stops me.

“One more thing, before you go. Tell my Aunt to fly high and

keep dancing. I will be watching for her.”

Individuality Can Never Be Taken Away

True freedom and individuality is a gift. Many people believe that

freedom means having enough money to do what they please when

they please. Some of us feel that having no responsibility to others, to a job or to societal norms keeps us free. Even though the idea

of personal freedom is appealing to many, those we consider to be

“free spirits” are often ridiculed. People who are individuals and

follow the dictates of their inner conscience can surprise and baffle their friends and family. They may not always be appreciated for

their individuality and even teased and bullied for being different.

The fear of being criticized and humiliated for one’s personal

choices keeps many people imprisoned. We want to be liked and

accepted by others. We quiet our inner voice in favor of others ex-

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pectations. Yet, our striving and competiveness to fit in, be popular and better than others is a false victory.

You are not meant to follow the dictates of others. A unique

and individual expression of the divine, you fulfill your purpose

by shining bright in your beauty. You have come into this material

world to listen within and be true to who you are. When you do

this you discover a source of power that never goes away. No matter what the world throws your way, when you know who you are and

unlock the joy in your heart and soul it can never be taken away.

When you are an individual you become a light to others. Your

influence spreads far and wide and you shake others out of the sta-

tus quo and complacency. You act as a catalyst and motivate others

to take chances, discover their authentic self and risk being different. Not only does your individuality give your friends, family and co-workers the courage to express their individuality, it helps those on the other side as well.

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6

Heart Disease, Call to Love

The most common cause of the death for both men and women

worldwide is cardiovascular or heart disease. More women

die of heart disease that the next four causes of death combined,

including all forms of cancer. On average 2,200 Americans die of

heart disease each day. The main factors and causes said to contribute to this disease are tobacco and alcohol use, poor diet, lack of physical exercise, diabetes, obesity and heredity.

On the other side, there is no illness. There is no heart disease,

aches, pains, obesity, poor diet or alcohol or tobacco use either. But, the heart exists. It is as important in the spirit realm as it is in the physical world. Similar in some ways to its function in the physical body, the spiritual heart is the center of the energy body. It is through the heart that we are connected to the pure vital energy

of the divine source. In the spirit realm love feeds and nurtures

the energy body, just as food and water are essential to the physical body.

Love is the spirit realm. When you pass over to the other side,

you along with your guides and angels review your earth school les-

sons. The most important aspect of this is how well you loved. How

much forgiveness, kindness, compassion are you able to express to

95

others and to yourself ? Do you act on the positive and good? Do

you listen to your heart and make decisions that support your most

loving self ? These are the kind of questions that are of importance to your soul, both here and in the beyond.

Once on the other side we continue to grow and heal with those

who we were in relationship with in the earth life. Many of my cli-

ents want to know if their loved ones in spirit are with other fam-

ily members on the other side. They are often pleasantly surprised

when those in spirit tell them that they are working things through with a sibling or parent that they had a challenging relationship

with while in the physical realm. Sometimes it is not until we pass over that we forgive and heal our earthly relationships.

Learning the Relationship Lessons

It is through our relationships that our soul can make great prog-

ress on its evolutionary path. Our earth lessons for the most part, are centered on some form or expression of love. Before we come

into physical life we choose the people who we will be in relation-

ship with. Based on our shared lessons with them, we also choose

the type of relationship that best supports our mutual growth.

Before birth, you know who your mother, father, siblings and

future partners and children will be. When I first became aware of

this concept, I was taken back. I wondered why I would have cho-

sen such difficulties. Did I want to punish myself ? Had something

gone terribly wrong? It took me awhile to realize that struggling

through the significant relationships of my early life forced me

discover my inner strength and individuality. Had circumstances

had been different. I might not have developed the intuitive path

that I now cherish. The purpose of suffering is to become aware.

The soul is willing to create whatever experiences we most need for our awakening. Even if the human self would just as well run away

from the experience.

96 ~ Heart Disease, Call to Love

In the physical realm we do not always understand the impor-

tant role that others play in helping us to come into our most lov-

ing and powerful self. A distant or unloving father or mother may

compel you to become independent and discover the love within

yourself. A selfish sibling may help you to stand up for yourself. An abusive mate may force you to look within at hidden but deep feelings of unworthiness and shame and find your power. We regress

when we become victims and do not take care of ourselves. Emo-

tions like anger, guilt, shame and resentment are like poisons. They are a toxic and dense vibration that robs your physical body of vital life force energy. The negative emotions that you may be holding

onto cause your physical body stress, distress and eventually illness.

Your Emotional Purpose

You have come into this world with an emotional purpose. If you

suffer from cardiovascular or heart disease you may not be on track with your earth school lesson of loving self and others. Discover

your emotional lessons. Examine your relationship challenges. Is

there childhood hurt or pain that still needs to be resolved? Do you love yourself and allow others to love you? Have you forgiven yourself and others for any intentional or unintentional pain, slights or unloving behavior? All of your lessons of love must be learned, either here or on the other side.

Becoming aware of the lessons inherent in even your most dif-

ficult relationships empower you to learn and move on to more

positive experiences. Loving self is essential for good health, mind body and spirit. Heart disease has many physical causes and contributing factors, all of which are important. A good diet, exercise and maintaining a healthy weight are essential. When we truly love

ourselves it is easier to commit to eating foods that nourish our

body, exercising and adopting healthy habits. We feel good and be-