Yearning Absolution (Yearning Series) (11 page)

Gwen tried not to hold her breath
as she sat tapping her foot in the reception area of an Obstetrician’s office a
few days later. It made her antsy to be around so many pregnant. She still
hadn’t quite comes to terms with the fact that she would fit right in with all
of them soon enough. Most had big round bellies that Gwen tried not to stare
at. While she knew how being pregnant went, it was a whole different story to
apply it to herself. She had been pregnant multiple times but never long enough
to even get past the very early stages. She wondered what it felt like to have
a huge, moving, living thing in your stomach.

Cole squeezed her hand making her
turn to look at him. “It’ll be ok.” He leaned over and spoke quietly into her
ear, before kissing her softly on the cheek.

Before Gwen could respond, she was
being called back into the room. Once in the private room, she didn’t have to
wait long before the doctor joined her and Cole. Gwen quickly caught the doctor
up with her numerous pregnancies and the abusive environment she had been in years
ago. She also informed the doctor of the fact that she had her tubes tied,
which lead to her complete confusion as to how she was now pregnant.

“Well, sometimes, over time, your
body can heal and reconnect the fallopian tubes again. Which would then allow an
egg to pass through, therefor opening the possibility for a pregnancy. I would
really like to get an ultrasound so we can really see what we are dealing with
and make sure that this is indeed a viable pregnancy with the proper placement
in the uterus.” The short female doctor, whom Gwen couldn’t remember the name
of, informed them. She stood and motioned for them to follow her. “We will just
move a few doors down to where the ultrasound machine is located.”

“Well, here comes the fun part.”
Gwen let out a deep breath before slowly following the doctor. Cole rubbed her
shoulders as they walked down the hall.

“Please, be seated.” The doctor
pointed at a table in a dimmed room. “Pull your pants and panties down to your
hip bones. Normally, I would do a transvaginal ultrasound first, but since your
blood work is showing you are further along, we should be able to do an abdominal
ultrasound.”

“Okay.” Gwen had no idea what she
was talking about but simply slipped her pants down her hips a bit, pulled up
her shirt and laid back on the table. Cole stood next to her, holding her hand.

The doctor squirted warm jelly on
her belly before placing a wand on her lower stomach. Almost immediately a fast
whooshing sound filled the room.

“It appears your little one is
ready for their first picture, didn’t even have to look at all.” The doctor
smiled and turned the screen to show a little black circle filled with a
whitish blob in the middle of it. “Well, how exciting. There appears there is
another baby right here.” She pointed to a second circle. “Congratulations, you
are having twins.”

“Excuse me?” Gwen had to clear her
throat twice before she could actually speak the words. “There is two babies?”

“Yes. See here is baby number one.”
The doctor pointed to the screen and a black circle. Then moved the wand
slightly to show a second black circle “And here is baby number two.”

Gwen just stared at the screen
completely dumbfounded. She literally had no words at all. She wasn’t sure how to
react to the news. She could barely wrap her head around one baby let alone
two.

“It looks like both babies are
doing good and in the correct placement in the uterus and not a fallopian tube
pregnancy or anything. I will now take a few measurements of them so we can
keep track of them as they grow and it’ll also give us a better idea how far
along you are.” The doctor was speaking but Gwen could barely comprehend what
she was saying. Gwen’s eyes were still locked on the screen looking at the two
little creatures moving around in her belly. She couldn’t feel them moving, but
she could see them moving on the screen.

Gwen knew she should look at Cole
or try to speak to him to see how he was feeling about this news, but she
couldn’t force her eyes to leave the screen.

Two. There was TWO babies in there.

After a few minutes passed, the doctor
had finished doing whatever it was that she was doing with the machine and she
turned her chair to face Gwen and Cole again.

“After taking all the measurements,
I would say you are right about 11 to 12 weeks pregnant. Both babies are right
on track with size and doing well. I am going to print you out a few pictures
to take home with you.” The doctor tore off a strip of black and white glossy
pictures from the machine and handed them to Gwen, who just stared at them
while the doctor wiped off the jelly from her stomach and turned off the
machine. “And we should see you back here in four weeks, unless you have any
reason to need to come in sooner. You can always also come into the emergency
room as well.”

“Thank you so much, doctor.” Cole
shook her hand. Gwen followed suit and lifted her eyes only briefly to meet the
doctors. She stood and walked down the hall in a haze. Cole made her follow up
appointment while she once again stared at the pictures. He ushered her out of
the office and into the bright sunlight. “Are you okay? You really haven’t said
much the whole time we’ve been here.”

“I think so. I’m not entirely
sure.” Gwen looked into his eyes. “I was just trying to grasp the fact that
there was one surprise baby and now there is two. I didn’t think I would ever
be pregnant again. I’m not unhappy. More like shocked.”

“I’m sure they are gonna keep us
busy for a few years. But I think it’ll be interesting and exciting. I can’t
wait to watch your belly grow and feel them move and kick.” Cole placed his hand
over her stomach and kissed her forehead. “I’ll take care of you, baby. These
are our babies. A little piece of you and a little piece of me. I’m sure
they’ll be so perfect.”

“I’m glad you are so comfortable
with all this. I feel like the ground just fell out of my world. Everything is
different than I had ever planned. My mind is so messed up right now. I can’t
even be happy over this. I just keep thinking what would McKayla say if she was
here. Would she be happy, would she be upset? Would they call her mom too? Or
would she be called an aunt? How would that work? I guess it doesn’t matter.”
Gwen trailed off as her eyes filled with tears. Too much was changing in her
life and all too fast for her to even come to terms with one thing let alone
the many things falling around her.

“That’s not at all what I meant. I
wish I could fix the McKayla situation. I wish I could change the way she is
acting. This isn’t exactly how I saw things going either. I am just trying to
find the happy side of it. I don’t want my children to ever think they weren’t
wanted and loved. They might not have been planned, but I will love them with
every inch of my soul.” Cole pulled her into a hug and pressed her head to his
chest. “This is all so overwhelming with huge changes for both of us. But we
will be ok. I hope that McKayla comes back and wants to be in their lives and
ours as well. I’m sure she will. She loves you. She is just having a hard time
with the changes being made.”

“I hope so. She doesn’t even know
about this new, huge change.” Gwen sobbed into his chest. “This is so freaking
hard and confusing.”

“Let’s get you home so you can rest
and take it easy.” Cole pulled back and led her to the car.

Once they returned to the
apartment, Cole had Gwen in bed before she could really object. Cole said he had
to work some so he tucked her in before going into the office off his room. He
wanted to be close at hand if she needed him. Gwen dozed off as images of two
sets of little hands and feet swirled through her mind.

“Damn it. I told you to make sure
no more calls got through. Block every number but the ones programmed into her
phone if necessary. I don’t want her dealing with this shit right now on top of
everything else.” Cole’s voice carried into the bedroom as Gwen woke. He
sounded very angry with whoever was on the other end of the phone.

Gwen slid out of the bed and
silently moved towards his office to see what had him so upset. She rarely
heard Cole raise his voice to anyone over anything.

“Yes, I’ll take any information you
were able to find. Send it over… No, I don’t think she knows anything, just take
care of Gwen’s phone now.” Cole threw his phone on his desk just as Gwen
entered the office. He had his fingers pressed into his eyes as he leaned back
in his office chair.

“What are you doing to my phone?”
Gwen stood with her hands on her hips, glaring at him.

“Well, Cole, do tell. Who are you
trying to keep me from talking to? Is it McKayla? Is that why I haven’t heard
from her?” Gwen crossed her arms over her chest ready to have their first big
fight.

“Absolutely not. I would never do
something like that.” Cole shoved back from the desk and swiftly moved in front
of her. “Please, sit. We can talk about this, but you should be sitting.”

“I don’t want to sit. I want to
know why you are messing with my phone. You can’t just control shit in my life.
It doesn’t work that way.” Gwen huffed but sat down in a chair in front of his
desk. “Spill.”

Cole ran his hand roughly through
his hair and took a deep breath as he sat in the chair next to Gwen. He grabbed
the arm of Gwen’s chair and moved it so they were facing. “It’s not what you
think it is.”

“Damn it, Cole. Just fucking tell
me what is going on. I don’t want to play these games and stretch it out. Just
fucking tell me.” Gwen nearly growled at him. She could feel her blood pumping
through her body as her heart sped up. She couldn’t help it. Her hormones were
raging from the pregnancy and if it wasn’t McKayla he was keeping from her,
there was only one other person she could think of. The mere thought of him
closed her throat. Especially now that she was pregnant.

“I need to explain a lot and I need
you to hear it through, okay?” Cole spoke calmly as he reached for her hand.
But she pulled her hand away and crossed her arms over her chest.

“Fine.”

“Ever since you moved in here. I
have had private investigators searching for everything they could about your
past. Especially the men who abducted you.” Cole swallowed before continuing.
“It took a bit of work, but they found them. We know their names and a lot
about their lives. Richard is the surviving brother. Dennis was the… other
brother. They were both married, however, when Dennis mysteriously disappeared
Richard’s relationship fell apart and they divorced shortly thereafter. The
investigators have been unable to find where either of the wives ran off to but
it seems as soon as the ink was dry on the divorce, Richard’s wife vanished
along with Dennis’ wife. There has never been any mention anywhere of what
happened to Dennis. His wife never filed a missing person report, no one did.
As far as the investigator can tell, they were both abusive to their wives and
the wives were both happy to finally get away. Dennis’ death being the event
that they used to finally escape.”

Gwen swallowed hard. Many times
over the years she had thought up many questions about the brothers and now she
was getting answers to them. At least it seemed that the women who had been
married to the evil men had gained their freedom, as well as Gwen, with Dennis’
death.

“Apparently right around the time
Dennis disappeared, Richard became very erratic and lost his job. I’m sure he
was busy trying to cover up the murder of his brother and their secret life.”
Cole continued. “Richard got married again a few years ago. That relationship
seemed to be yet another abusive one. His wife, however, filed for divorce a
couple months ago and went into the witness protection program to get away.
That is about the time we started finding hints that he started really searching
for you again.”

Gwen just nodded slightly. Her
hands fisted under her crossed arms. Her jaw clenched. So he had decided to
come after her when his second wife couldn’t put up with him anymore.

“He has been mailing you flowers
and other little notes at least once a week ever since you moved in here. I
used some connections to block his number from being able to have a call connect
to your phone after that first time. Instead it rings a different line and
voicemail. That is until a few days ago when somehow he figured it out and started
using a new number. That was who had called the day you and McKayla got into a
fight. He had left you messages, which I got to hear and thankfully you didn’t.
We are still trying to find exactly where in the city he is but we know he is
still in the city. We are closing in. I just don’t want you to deal with this.
I am handling it. We will find him and make sure he disappears from your life
forever.”

“Why didn’t you tell me before now?
Why hide it? I’m a big girl. I can handle it. It is good for me to know what is
going on so I can help stay away from trouble, you know.” Gwen took a deep
breath, trying to relax the tension that was gripping her shoulders. Cole stood
and walked behind her to gently rub her shoulders.

“I know, baby. I know. But I didn’t
want you to have to worry about it. I didn’t want you to think about it. My
guys are working on it. I want to protect you from him. He has done enough
damage and doesn’t deserve to have even one more moment of your life.” Cole
leaned down and kissed the top of her head. “Especially now. With the babies on
the way. We... I... I can’t lose you or our babies. I’ll do anything to keep
you safe and away from that monster.”

“Okay. So, then what was the call
about tonight?” Gwen turned in her chair to look up at him.

“He called and left another vile
message from a different number. And my guys were updating me on the new
information they had found and sending the paperwork over on it.”

“What is he saying in these messages?”
Gwen’s face flinched but she knew that she needed to ask the question even
though she didn’t want to know the answer. But she had to know.

“You don’t want to know. It doesn’t
matter.” Cole moved to kneel in front of her. He bent and kissed her stomach
before looking up at her. “All you need to do is take care of yourself and the
babies. I’ll take care of him.”

“Cole. Tell me.” Gwen used a stern
tone that she rarely used so he knew she wasn’t going to back down on this.

“He just talks about all the things
he wants to do to your body or reminisces about the past times he was with you.
The ways he wants to make you pay for what you did to his brother.” Cole
grimaced as the messages replayed in his mind. He wasn’t normally a very
violent person. But this man, this monster, who had abused the woman he loved
more than his own life, made him want to do things he could get arrested just
thinking about. “Gwen, my beautiful flower, I refuse to vocalize his disturbing
thoughts to you. I don’t want you to link those words to my voice and my face.”

Gwen reached out and cupped his
cheeks with both her hands as a smile smiled tugged at her lips. Even with
everything going on, he always knew the words that would get to her. “Cole,
take us back to bed. Come lay with me and your babies.”

“My pleasure.” Cole’s eye twinkled.
It was one of the only times Gwen had even spoke of the babies. He knew it was
because of her many forced miscarriages at the hand of the monster they had
just been discussing.

Cole scooped her up in his arms and
carried her back to their room. He laid her down on the bed before climbing in
next to her. Tenderly, he ran his fingers from her neck, between her breasts.
They circled her belly button before softly rubbing across her slightly
distended belly. “I will say that I’m a bit fascinated with watching your body
change. I can’t wait to see you with a large round belly and feel our little
ones push against my hand.”

“I know. I never thought I’d enjoy
being pregnant. Heck, I never thought I’d be pregnant and be happy about it.
But I couldn’t be happier than to be carrying your babies. I can’t wait to see
them and see who they look like.” Gwen smiled up at him. “I’m sorry I’m so
hormonal. I really am happy. I just miss McKayla. I wish I knew how to fix the
problems and make her come back. But right now I don’t see how that is going to
happen. I’ve lost my girlfriend, my lover, and my best friend all at once.”

“Sh sh sh.” Cole pulled her head to
his chest as tears rolled down her face. She pulled back after a moment.

“Ugh. These hormones make me even
more weepy than normal. I’m gonna call McKayla tomorrow and try to get her to
talk to me about things.” Gwen pushed her hair over her shoulder and wiped her
eyes with the edge of Cole’s white t-shirt. She looked up and saw the amused
look on his face. “Well, I figured I already got mascara on the shoulder, why
not ruin it a bit more?”

“Nah, it’ll wash out.” Cole pushed
up and pulled the shirt over his head and tossed it off the bed. “There now you
can stop ruining my $200 shirts.”

“That cost $200? Oh my gosh. I’ll
buy you a new one.” Gwen looked at the shirt that was so carelessly thrown on
the ground.

“I have a closet full of them. I’m
not worried about it.” Cole laughed and pulled her back down to his chest. “How
are you feeling? Sickness wise, that is.”

“Better. I guess. The doctor did
say that at 12 weeks the sickness would start to go away and it already seems
to be fading. I think the shock of the pregnancy helped push it back too.” Gwen
laid her head down on his chest. Cole ran his fingers through her hair, his
other hand resting on top of hers on his chest.