Authors: Leigh Greenwood
“I know you don’t like Emma…”
“No, I don’t, but I wouldn’t worry about that either. You seem to be making it up to her.”
“And what do you mean by that?”
“What could I mean? She hasn’t left your side since she got here. I’m surprised she doesn’t sleep with you. At least then we could offer her room to the Jeffries, and they wouldn’t have to sleep in their wagon.”
“As a matter of fact, I like the Jeffries more than I like Emma,” he said, tired of Emma’s constant presence. “I wish they did have her room.”
“Try and convince the Jeffries. You haven’t been seen in
their
company for eight days.”
“Good Lord, you sound jealous.”
“Me!” Sibyl nearly shrieked. “Jealous of that scandalous hussy?”
“Don’t talk about Emma like that. You don’t have to like her…
“
I don’t!
”
“… but that’s no excuse for calling her names. I’ve known Emma since we were children and, well, she’s almost like my sister.” Sibyl tried to achieve a laugh that could indicate the full extent of her scorn, but it sounded more like a hysterical titter.
“You couldn’t insult any woman more completely if you tried. I dare you to say that to her face.”
“She’d be complimented.”
“She’d
say
that was the nicest tiling you’d ever said to her, but inside she’d be ready to die and willing to kill any female who’d overheard it”
“You don’t understand Emma.”
“And you don’t understand women. You never have understood me . . .”
“That’s the truth!”
“. . . and you don’t understand Emma Stratton if you don’t think being your sister isn’t the furthest thing from her mind. And if that
is
what you think, then
you’ve
got some pretty bizarre ideas about family relations.”
“Since you’re the expert, maybe you can answer a question for me.”
“What?”
“How did a marvelous lady like your aunt end up with a niece like you and,” he pursued, ignoring the indignant gasp, “why does she keep on loving a bad-tempered shrew who’s never pleased no matter what people do for her.”
“What did you ever do to please me?” Sibyl inquired.
“If I weren’t a gentleman, I’d tell you.”
Sibyl flushed crimson and rose from her seat in a towering rage, uncertain whether she wanted to kill him now, or wait until she found him in Emma’s arms and slay them both at the same time.
“If you were a gentleman, you would never even think of making such a reference.”
“Why? Are you ashamed of it?”
“I’m ashamed to think that I was so easily taken in; that I could fall, just as dozens of others have no doubt fallen, for a set of powerful thighs and a few sweet promises.” Sibyl brushed the spurting tears away from her eyes. “Yes, I’m ashamed to think I was such a fool that I gave you what I proudly denied every other man, even those who asked honorably.”
“I never lied to you,” Burch spoke softly, reaching out to her. “I do love you.”
“Touch me, Burch Randall, and I will scream and scream and
scream
until every man and woman in this place is at that door demanding to know exactly what your intentions are.”
“My intentions
were
to talk to you, to try and knock some sense into that hard head of yours, but nothing seems to be able to penetrate that duck hide or that damned snotty-nosed Virginia superiority”
“That’s just like a man, especially the variety that grows among the sagebrush, to think that
knocking
some sense into a woman’s head is the answer to everything, even clearing his own conscience.”
“What is wrong with you?” Burch asked, completely bewildered. “I left here before Christmas after the best four days of my life. I could hardly wait to get back. I even let myself be fooled into thinking you felt the same way.”
Sibyl’s resistance almost buckled. If she could just believe him; but she couldn’t, she had seen the evidence with her own eyes.
“And what do I find waiting for me when I do get back? A virago, clawing at anyone and anything that tries to come near her, a spitfire that denies her own words, her own body.”
“Oh, foul,” Sibyl cried furiously. “My body can’t tell the difference between love that’s meant to be shared between two people and the kind that’s bought and sold, but my mind can. And I won’t settle for that, not if I have to go to my grave a virgin.”
“It’s a little late for that.”
“Beast!” she wailed, then snatched up a small figurine and threw it at him. Burch caught it dexterously.
“Careful, you don’t want to break it. It came from Virginia, and everything from Virginia is
priceless?
“Not quite,” retorted Sibyl bitterly. “I seem to have come rather cheaply.”
“Don’t talk about yourself like that. I won’t let you.”
“Why should you care? You got what you came for.”
“You know that’s not true.”
“Do I? I can’t tell you how ashamed I am to admit I actually
believed
that you loved me, that you wanted me to be your wife.”
“We never discussed marriage.”
“I
know
that now, but you see I was an innocent fool. I thought when a man said he loved a woman, he also meant that he wanted to marry her. But we’re old-fashioned in Virginia, and I guess our ways are outmoded. I suppose I’m outmoded too, but I can’t change that now, not that way.”
“But I don’t want you to change. I love you just as you are, and I do want you to be my wife.”
Sibyl thought her heart would break. “A week ago I thought those were the sweetest words any woman could hear. I guess I should be thankful I know better now but, oh God, how I wish I’d never had to learn.”
Confused, angry, and completely out of patience, Burch strode across the room and dragged Sibyl roughly out of the chair and into his arms.
“See if this has gone stale after a week.” He kissed her with all the fire and passion Sibyl remembered so well. Too desolated to fight and too hungry for even a scrap of his love, Sibyl returned his embrace. “I knew you couldn’t deny you wanted me. Your body wouldn’t let you. Now why don’t you stop this ridiculous nonsense and tell me what’s wrong.” He was stunned to see her crying almost uncontrollably.
“You’ll never understand,” she wept. “You’ve had your way; you got what you wanted. Now go away and leave me alone.”
“Good God, woman, I’ve said I love you and that I want to marry you. What more can you want?”
“Nothing. What more could any woman want? Only tell me how long I get to keep you before I start having to share.” The voice was completely cynical, obliterating her utter desolation of spirit, and Burch’s temper snapped.
“You are hard to the core, aren’t you? Tell me, did
you
mean it when you said you loved me, or were you just after any man willing to make you a woman? Couldn’t you find anybody in Virginia with the guts to take on the job?”
The transformation in Sibyl was instantaneous. “Nothing I’ve ever done has warranted such a low, vile accusation. There are no words adequate to tell you how much I regret what has happened between us. I believed, I hoped, that I had found someone who could understand that I had to be more than a shell, following a man about, doing what he asked, thinking as he told me. My happiness at finding what I had sought for so long is my only possible excuse for behavior whose memory alone causes me an agony of mortification.”
“Sibyl, don’t let’s do this do this to each other. This is no way. . .”
“Sibyl, dear, are you still up?” Augusta was startled to see Burch. “Oh, if I’d known you were here . . .”
“It’s all right. He was just asking me about tomorrow. He’s done, and I’ve got just a few more stitches on your dress.”
“You poor thing. I had no idea you would have to work so long. I could have worn another dress.”
“I wanted to do it, and it’ll only take me a few minutes more. See? Isn’t it lovely?” She turned back to Burch, but the glassy look told him there was no more to be said. “I think that finishes our business. Good night.”
Burch looked like he would say more, but Sibyl’s eyes grew harder.
“Please, no more. Nothing can change things now.” Burch turned and left, and Sibyl, her heart breaking, turned to her aunt, once more forced to put on a smile to mask the torment that was destroying her.
The wedding was the most difficult ordeal of Sibyl’s short life. She and Burch had not exchanged a word all day, but she didn’t need words to sense his presence, didn’t need the sound of his voice to know that he was longing to speak to her. The very air around them was charged with unspoken love and unacknowledged longing, unacknowledged on her part at least. Time and time again, she looked up to find him staring at her. Burch’s piercing gaze never fell before hers; it would always be Sibyl who finally looked away.
The ceremony itself was held in the ranch room in front of a crackling fire. Burch was the best man and Sibyl, as maid of honor, had to stand listening to the words she had hoped would one day be spoken for them. She choked back bitter tears, knowing that now those words would
never
be spoken for her—with Burch or anyone else. She tried not to let her tears flow freely, but no one except Burch was watching her today; all eyes were on Augusta and Lasso.
At the words “Do you take this man?” Sibyl had to fight to keep from running out of the room. Only knowing what terrible embarrassment it would cause her aunt kept her feet firmly planted, but she dared not look at Burch. That would be too much. None of the guests saw anything wrong when, at the closing words, she flung herself at her aunt, sobbing hysterically, and then transferred her watery embrace to Lasso. After all, weren’t you were supposed to cry at weddings?
Only Emma, her eyes and understanding sharpened by jealousy, understood the true meaning of the looks that passed between Burch and Sibyl, and it was like a knife in her belly. But she had no intention of relinquishing her quarry. She might never be able to enjoy Burch’s love, but she was determined to marry him, and she saw her chance in Sibyl’s rejection. All she needed was an excuse to stay on at the Elkhorn, and she had it in Auggie’s failure to return for her.
The next few hours passed in a whirl of activity and an endless round of congratulations, best wishes, and toasts to the happy couple. They had decided against a honeymoon because Lasso’s little girls were still not completely recovered from the influenza.
“I don’t mind in the least,” Augusta told Lasso when he apologized for postponing the trip. “I don’t like to travel during the winter, and I’d rather not wait until spring to be married. You’ll be even busier then. Besides, I never was comfortable in large resorts or hotels. I’d rather spend the time getting used to my new home and learning how to make you and the girls comfortable.”
Burch thought how fortunate his friend was to find such a woman. Some might have been willing to make the sacrifice, but none with such a genuine, cheerful smile. He wondered what Sibyl would have done.
Sibyl accompanied her aunt when she went to change into the dress she would wear on the ride to Lasso’s ranch, but Augusta was so excited she could hardly find a buttonhole or hook. “Here, let me,” Sibyl said, quickly doing up the buttons.
“You know that I don’t want any more of the things here, don’t you?” Augusta said to Sibyl.
“There’s still a lot that’s yours.”
“But Lasso’s house is already furnished. I really don’t have anywhere to put it.”
“It’s just like you to be giving everything you have to somebody else, but one of these days, when you
do
go on your honeymoon, I’m going to pile it all in a wagon and have Ned take over.”
“I wouldn’t be able to close the doors,” Augusta said, laughing lightheartedly. “No, you keep it. With such a large house, you and Burch won’t have any trouble finding a use for it.” The smile froze on Sibyl’s face, making her look white and tired.
I hope you’ll get some rest after everyone leaves, dear,” Augusta urged, concerned at Sibyl’s drawn look. “You look worn to the bone.”
“Don’t worry, I don’t plan to come out of my room for days.” At least not until Burch leaves the house, she thought.
“I’ll come back in a day or two and help you get everything back in order.”
“You’ll do no such thing,” Sibyl stated emphatically. “You’ll have your hands full with a new house and family, and I have Rachel to help me, not to mention Ned and Balaam. I ought to come help
you
move in. Never fear,” she relented when a slight frown crossed her aunt’s brow. “I promise not to intrude on you before the spring thaw.”
“That’s not it, dear. You
know
Lasso and I would welcome you and Burch at any time. I just realized that I was leaving you here all by yourself, and that’s precisely what I came out here to prevent.”
“Console yourself that you’re only ten miles away instead of two thousand.”
“There is that, but your mother would never approve.”
“I doubt mother would approve of me under any circumstances,” Sibyl professed bitterly.