Worth the Wait (Crimson Romance) (5 page)

His tongue played with the curve of her ear. “Tell me to touch you.” Her zipper released, and his hands skimmed along the waistband of her panties. All reasoning left.

“Touch me.”

She felt his smile against the side of her neck before his lips returned to hers. At the same time his hand broke the barrier of her underwear. His fingers gently played with the hairs covering her sex, each pull sending a shockwave of desire through her. She knew she was soaking wet, and was almost embarrassed by it until he finally slid his finger against her clit. She gasped, pulling away from his kiss to drop her head back. He groaned and kissed the side of her neck.

He was devouring her. She could hardly breathe she was so engulfed by his passion. It was raw, hot, and overpowering. It was actually about to happen. She was going to lose her virginity.

But she wasn’t in control. He was making her feel out of control, and very unsure. This was happening too fast.

The doorbell rang, bringing reality back to her. She pushed against his chest. “Jared, someone’s at your door.”

His head jerked up. He stared at her, searching her eyes for something while his hand slowly slipped out of her underwear. Her body thrummed and she fought between asking him to continue and thinking she needed to escape. Bewilderment and passion swirled within his eyes. Had he noticed her panic?

The doorbell rang again. He slowly stepped back, took a deep breath, and buttoned his shirt.

“I ordered dinner. That’s probably it. We can eat in another part of the house,” his eyes flicked to the bed and back to her, “where it’s less volatile.”

He strolled out of the bedroom and didn’t wait for her to follow. She was making a mistake. Jared had awakened an inferno of desire within her she didn’t know how to control. Even now, with him out of the room, the wetness continued to flow between her thighs and her breathing was ragged. She couldn’t go through with this. It was too much.
He
was too much. She would have to find someone else to take her virginity. Someone who didn’t make her feel as if she were riding a roller coaster of desire.

With shaky hands she buttoned and zipped her shorts. Her face burned as she remembered his hands against her. She wanted it again. Okay, so sex with Jared wouldn’t be bad. In fact, it would probably be awesome. But could she really do it without losing herself?

She rushed out of his bedroom to the front door. Jared’s back was to her and she could hear a woman’s voice on the other side. She couldn’t make out what the woman said. Jared’s shoulders were tense. He glanced over his shoulder, saw her, and cursed.

“Not today, Monica,” he said and slammed the door.

When he turned to face her he at least had the decency to look guilty. “Sorry about that.”

She held up a hand. “Don’t be. No need to apologize for who you are.” Her words were strong, but inside she was embarrassed. Common sense would have told her he was seeing someone else, but it didn’t ease the pain of having another woman show up at his door while they were pressed against his bed. “I think I should go. This was a bad idea.”

He frowned and took a step toward her. “Because of that?” He pointed to the door. “That was nothing.”

She shook her head. “No, that’s the reason I chose you. No commitments, no chance of love. But you’re too much, what happened in your bedroom was too much. I thought I could handle it, but I’m not sure anymore.”

He relaxed and smiled. “Tasha, what happened in my bedroom was normal. You want to feel that type of passion with whoever you have sex with.”

“Does it always feel that … overwhelming?”

He walked over and took her head in his hands. “With the right person.” He kissed the side of her mouth.

She froze. “But you’re not the right person.”

He rolled his eyes. “The right person in bed isn’t always the right person to marry.”

“But — ” she started, but he interrupted her with a kiss. She forgot what she was about to say when his arms encircled her. With a sigh she wrapped her arms around his neck and let him deepen the kiss.

When he pulled away he smiled at her. “I want to take you to Charleston for your birthday.”

It took a second for his words to penetrate her brain. “You want to spend the weekend with me in Charleston?”

“It’s not very far so we can get there in a day, and we don’t have to worry about people we know seeing us together. You mentioned that you wanted discretion.”

She frowned. “But my family and I get together for my birthday.”

“You’ll be thirty, Tasha. They will be okay if you miss a year.”

She tried to pull away. “That’s too much. I can’t do that.”

“Can’t or won’t?”

“I won’t.”

“Why?”

“Because … it’s not what I wanted. I don’t want a romantic getaway with you. I just want you to take my virginity as quickly as possible.”

“Romance isn’t a part of this, Tasha. I’m not taking you away in order to woo you. I’m taking you away so that we can be discreet.”

She looked around. “What’s wrong with your house?”

“Too many people know me and watch my house. Do you really want to be linked as my latest fling?”

“No, but … ”

“Do you really want to lose your virginity, or was all this just some type of game?”

She thought about Charles and every other man either afraid of commitment or looking for a conquest when they realized she was a virgin. Did she really want to do that for another ten years?

Her eyes met Jared’s. His arms were still wrapped around her waist, and even now she wanted to lean up and kiss him. It was much easier to remain a virgin when she wasn’t burning with desire. If she were really going to do this, it made more sense to do it with a man who turned her on than one who didn’t.

“I’ll go to Charleston.” Triumph filled his eyes. Feeling like his conquest, instead of the other way around, she pulled out of his embrace and he let her. “Don’t look so damn cocky. I still might change my mind.”

“I know,” he said, smiling. “Let’s get something to drink while we wait on the food.”

He held out his hand and she took it while trying to ignore the feeling that she’d made a life changing decision with a man who would trample her heart.

“I asked Jared Patterson to take my virginity,” Tasha said to her sister the next morning. Not a second later, she was hit with the mist of sweet tea Angie spit out of her mouth.

“You what!” Angie yelled, wiping her mouth.

Tasha grabbed the towel hanging on her parents’ stove and wiped her face. She cut her eyes at her sister the entire time. “Was that really necessary?”

Angie snatched the towel from her. “Yes, when you say dumb stuff like that.”

“Girls, is everything all right?” their mom called from the dining room.

Tasha looked at Angie and mouthed the word
please
. Angie scowled but yelled back, “It’s fine, Mom. Tasha almost dropped the macaroni.”

Their mom started muttering, probably about how silly they were, but thankfully she didn’t come in the kitchen. Tasha got the macaroni out of the stove and placed it on the counter.

“Why would you ask him something like that?” Angie whispered.

“Because I need it gone and he’s the best person to do it.”

Angie put her hand on her hip. “I thought you were joking when you said that the other night. Did Shayla put you up to this? That girl is a straight up ho.”

Tasha rolled her eyes. Angie had never liked her friend Shayla. “Shayla is not a ho, and no, she didn’t put me up to this. I haven’t even told her about this. It was all my idea.”

Angie didn’t look convinced. “Well, it sounds like something she would support. I know Charles turned out to be an asshole, but that doesn’t mean you need to go out and sleep with Jared Patterson.” Angie wrinkled her nose when she said his name.

“He’s Malcolm’s brother, so he can’t be all bad.”

“Kenyatta got lucky with Malcolm. Jared is no good,” Angie replied. Angie and Kenyatta had been best friends since college.

“Jared isn’t no good. So he sleeps with a lot of women. He’s successful, good looking, and single. There’s nothing wrong with that.” She thought of the faceless woman he’d slammed the door on the day before and changed direction. “Look at the business he’s built with his gyms and health food line. You can’t deny the man is smart.”

Angie walked over to the stove and checked the collard greens. She stirred them before turning off the stove and turning back to Tasha. “Your first time is special. You don’t want to lose it to some guy who doesn’t give a damn about you.”

“That’s easy for you to say, Angie. You met Jonathan in college, and married him two weeks after graduation. You were lucky to find someone worth waiting for. I’ll be thirty next week. What if I never meet someone? I’ll die a virgin.”

“Better to die a virgin than burn in hell,” their mom’s voice cut in. She narrowed her eyes as she looked from one daughter to the other. “What are you talking about? You’d better not let your father know.”

Tasha sighed. Her parents would have simultaneous massive heart attacks if they knew her plans.

“I was just telling Angie she was lucky to find Jonathan and that I might die a virgin,” Tasha said with a frown.

Virginia Smith’s plump cheeks widened as she smiled at her oldest daughter. “Waiting to give herself to Jonathan on her wedding night was the most precious gift Angie could give him. We’re very proud of her.” Angie looked away guiltily and Tasha frowned. What was that look for? Virginia didn’t notice Angie’s guilt as her gaze drifted to Tasha. “Don’t go to your husband’s bed as damaged goods. Believe me, he’ll love you more for it.”

Tasha picked the macaroni from the counter with a pot holder and handed it to her mom. “I know, Mom. I’ll remember that.”

Virginia smiled. “Good girl. Your father should be finished with the deacon meeting by now. He’ll be home in a few minutes, and we’ll be ready to eat when he gets here.”

When their mom walked out of the kitchen with the macaroni, Tasha rushed over to Angie. “What was that look for?”

Angie didn’t meet her eye. “What look?”

“That guilty look. You’re hiding something.”

“No I’m not.” Angie tapped her foot. A sure sign she was lying.

“Tell me.”

Angie sighed. “All right.” She lowered her voice. “Jonathan wasn’t my first.”

It was Tasha’s turn to yell. “What!”

Angie grabbed Tasha’s hand and pulled her out the back door into their parents’ sunroom. She lowered her voice so much that Tasha had to strain to hear. “I lost my virginity to this idiot in college who only wanted to sleep with virgins. It was devastating and I don’t want the same thing to happen to you. Every day I wish I would have waited for Jonathan, and I can’t take that back. He doesn’t know. Nobody knows except Kenyatta and Carol, so please don’t say anything.”

Tasha hit Angie’s shoulder. “How could you tell your friends and not tell me?”

Angie hit Tasha back. “It’s a long story, all right? And not one I’m proud of. Just remember, once it’s gone you can’t get it back. Don’t waste your first time on someone like Jared.”

Tasha opened her mouth to reply when Jonathan came into the sunroom. He was holding the hand of their youngest daughter, Angela, who was dripping wet and looking at the floor. Knowing the eight-year-old, it was no telling what she’d gotten into.

“Angie, please come help me clean up the mess in the family room. It appears your daughter thought it would be fun to swim with your dad’s fish.”

Angie jaw dropped. “Not the fish tank?”

Jonathan nodded. “Exactly.”

Angie rolled her eyes. “Angela, what were you thinking?”

“I didn’t know it would fall,” Angela answered, eyes still glued to the floor.

Angie went over and the trio walked from the sunroom. Tasha shook her head. Cleaning her daughter’s mess would keep Angie from finishing her story for a while. At least now she knew why Angie always lectured her about waiting, but it didn’t make her any less pissed. Angie had made a bad choice her first time, but that was her bad. Tasha was almost thirty, not nineteen. She knew where things stood with her and Jared, so she wouldn’t get hurt. If anything, Angie’s confession only proved she needed to lose her virginity on her own terms.

The front door opened and a second later, her dad’s voice preached to Angela. It was the same thing every Sunday. One of Angie’s kids would do something unexpected and damaging — which was odd for girls, according to their mother — and then their dad would preach to them for the remainder of the afternoon. She took a deep breath. Missing it next week may not be bad at all.

Later that evening Tasha picked up the phone and called Shayla. Angie was wrong about a multitude of things, including her opinion of Shayla. Despite the four-year age gap between her and Shayla, they’d clicked after meeting in high school at a cheerleading camp. Although they attended different schools, they’d kept in touch. Shayla often came to Tasha whenever she needed to escape the trials of her life. She wasn’t a ho as Angie described, just really unlucky in love.

On the sixth ring Tasha prepared to hang up when Shayla’s breathless voice answered. “Hello.”

“Shayla, are you okay?”

“Oh, hey, Tasha. Yeah, I’m fine.” Shayla giggled. “I’m finished what I was doing.”

There was a man’s voice in the background and she guessed what Shayla was doing. “I’ll call you back.”

“No, no, no. Don’t go.” There was shuffling in the background before it got quiet. “What’s going on?” There was an echo to Shayla’s voice.

“You’re not about to use the bathroom are you?”

Shayla laughed. “No, I came in here for privacy. If you’re calling me at ten on a Sunday night it must be important.”

Tasha chuckled. “You’ve got that right.”

“Okay, so tell me what’s going on.”

“I told you about my date from hell with that guy Charles.”

“Yes. Damn, Tasha, I don’t know how you always end up with these fools. It might be better for you to sleep with someone and get it over with. Then the novelty of dating a virgin won’t plague you.”

“I know, right? That’s why I found someone to have sex with.”