Authors: A.D. Ryan
Jackson
scooted up to my right side despite a warning growl from Nick, and Roxanne lay
behind us. It didn’t take long for me to realize they were surrounding me,
sharing their body heat. The four of us must have fallen asleep, because when
my eyes opened the next time, the sky was lightening and the sun was coming up.
Even
though I was still tightly sandwiched in the middle of the three wolves, I
managed to get up and hop over Nick, stretching my back and shaking the melted
snow from the fur under my belly. Nick was next to rise, followed by Jackson
and Roxanne. We didn’t linger long, leaving when Nick barked the order.
There
was no real rush to get back to the manor, so we took our time. Jackson and
Roxanne stayed ahead of us until we reached the lake, and then we crossed it
together. When we arrived on the grounds of the manor, Jackson and Roxanne went
in separate directions while Nick and I headed to the little clearing where
we’d changed the day before.
I
loped behind the shrub where my clothes were and was shocked to find a fresh
shirt and pair of jeans waiting for me. Colby’s scent wafted up from the
clothes. I’d have to remember to thank her for the consideration.
About
ten feet away, I could hear Nick going through his change. While he had more
control over it than I did, he grunted and groaned through it as though it
might not be as painless as he made it look when I was around. It made sense;
our bodies went through so much that there was no way this would ever be
anything but painful in some way.
Focusing
on what Nick was going through was doing nothing for my own change, so I tried
to block him out as best I could so we could head inside. Thanks to our resting
the night before, I was able to shift with as much ease as usual, and I was
just pulling on my jeans when Nick rounded the corner.
“How
are you feeling?” he asked, running his fingers through his disheveled hair.
He, too, was dressed in a fresh pair of jeans and a black sweater.
I
fastened the button and then pulled my shirt on. “Pretty good.”
Nick
placed a finger along my jaw and tilted my head to the right. His hand gently
ghosted over the skin of my neck, and I recoiled when pain shot through me. I’d
almost forgotten about the cuts there.
“It’s
healing,” he assured me softly, but there was concern in his eyes. “It’ll be
slow, but in a couple of days, they’ll be nothing more than a couple scars.
I
placed a hand over his and moved them up to the side of my face. Smiling, I
pressed my cheek into his palm. “I better be more careful, or soon I’ll catch
up to you.”
I’d
only meant it as a joke, but the idea of that happening seemed to really upset
Nick. He only let me see this for a brief second before he moved our hands and
then threaded our fingers together. “Come on. Let’s head inside.”
Inside,
Vince,
Layla
, Corbin, Zack, and Colby were in the
living room. I could hear Marcus and Miranda moving around upstairs. I wasn’t
sure where the others were, but I didn’t dwell on it as Nick led me to the
plush, over-sized
arm chair
and eased me into it.
“Coffee?”
he offered, kissing the top of my head.
“Sounds
great, thank you,” I replied.
Zach
and Colby were seated next to each other on the couch, holding each other’s
hands and flirting innocently. I smiled at how adorable they were and remembered
how Nick and I used to be the same way a lifetime ago. “So, I guess this means
your talk with your dad went well,” I directed at Colby.
Her
cheeks turned pink. “As well as could be expected,” she offered. “Obviously
there are some rules and boundaries to be respected, but nothing you wouldn’t expect
from an overprotective father.”
I
nodded, knowing all too well what she was talking about. When my dad found out
I was dating Nick, he basically showed off his gun collection as a gentle
reminder for Nick to keep it in his pants. Not that we listened, of course; we
just got really good at keeping it behind closed doors…most of the time. There
was that one time we got busted, after all.
“Thanks
for the clothes,” I added. “I appreciate it.”
Colby
shrugged. “No worries. When Dad got back last night, he said you were pretty
wiped out and that you guys would probably take your time coming back.” She
paused. “He said you fought one of them. Are you…?”
I
nodded, the sting in my neck still very present. “Yeah. I handled it.”
Nick
returned with my coffee and one for himself. I shifted over a little to make
room for him on the oversized chair before draping my legs over his
comfortably. It struck me again just how easy it had been to fall into this
role with him. We hadn’t yet put a label on our relationship, but with every
day that passed, and everything that happened, we grew closer.
“Handled
it?” Nick laughed. “You were amazing. You didn’t even wait for us to reach
you.”
“So
you’ve bagged two,” Zach chimed in. “That’s impressive for someone so new.”
“So
I hear.”
Marcus
and Miranda entered the living room a minute later, and Miranda acknowledged my
neck with a look of worry. I assured them both that I was fine and asked about
the plan for that afternoon.
“We’ll
head out after dinner,” Marcus announced. “You and Nick can stay in tonight.”
I
sat up quickly. “What? No way.”
“Brooke,”
Marcus cut in. “You had a rough night. Asking you to force the change that much
in just twenty-four hours…” He paused. “Well, it takes its toll on someone so
new. You struggled, and if they were to catch you in the middle of a change…”
He let his sentence just hang there, but someone else was quick to finish it.
“They’ll
attack.”
I
turned around to see Roxanne enter the room with her arms folded across her
chest.
“They’ll
wait until you’re somewhere between human and wolf, completely unaware of anything
but the change, and too weak to defend yourself, and they’ll try to take you
out,” she explained. I listened to her, because she had just experienced it.
I
still didn’t like the idea of staying behind, but I accepted it, because my
Alpha said so.
Just
then, a roar sounded through the house, and my body tensed when I recognized
the crazed sound as Karl.
Marcus
sighed. “Besides, the two of you still need to decide what to do about that.”
I
watched
Nick prepare a plate of food, and then I watched as he picked the vial up off
the counter. I’d seen Miranda handle the substance the other day, so I knew
what Nick was doing with it. My nose tingled as the air became infused with the
subtle notes of the silver nitrate. They coated my nose and throat like spores
until there was an incessant
tickle
that I couldn’t
rid myself of. Something struck me as off, because when Miranda used it, I
didn’t feel the effects like this.
“Nick,” I said softly. He lifted his head,
his intense eyes meeting mine, his forehead furrowed with concentration. “Don’t
you think that’s enough?”
His eyes travelled between
mine
and the plate
a couple times before he screwed the top back on the vial.
“Probably, but I want to make sure it does the job.”
“Miranda used half that amount, and it seemed
to subdue him just fine,” I replied.
Silence filled the room, and I realized the
truth behind Nick’s actions. He confirmed them anyway. “I’m not trying to
subdue him,” he confessed, and I only stared at him. “I’m going to offer him a
choice.”
“A choice,” I repeated.
There was a steely resolve in Nick’s blue
eyes that, strangely, didn’t unnerve me the way that it probably should have.
“I’ve dosed his food with enough silver to kill him. He’ll know the minute he
smells it.”
Confused, I shook my head. “I don’t—”
“He can either choose to eat it or he can
agree to leave the Pack. He will be excommunicated and unable to settle down in
any one place for too long.” I remembered being told this before, and the idea
of Karl out there—even without a Pack to back him up—terrified me.
What if he came back? What if he tried to hurt someone else?
Nick must have sensed my reservations,
because he reached across the island and took me by the hand. “There is one
other option,” he said gently, carefully. “But would you look at me differently
if I did what I feel I should have done the night he attacked you?” A pause.
“Could you live with yourself?”
I thought about this for a moment, and while
the wolf in me salivated at the idea of Karl’s life coming to an end, the human
part of me was hesitant to jump on board. Nick interpreted my silence as that
of some kind of mercy and picked up the plate.
“Come on. You should be present for this,” he
announced and then led the way from the kitchen and toward the basement.
I followed slowly, and Nick had to slow his
pace so as not to get too far ahead. Truthfully, a large part of me was nervous
about this, and I couldn’t stop thinking about what Nick asked me. Even if Karl
chose to eat the poisoned food, Nick and I were responsible for his death.
Would I be able to look at myself in the mirror? And if he chose to live a
forced life of solitude, would I be able to live my life without constantly
looking over my shoulder?
It was an impossible situation with no clear
answer. We would just have to go with the flow. What other choice did we have?
As we descended the final flight of stairs,
my apprehension spiked, and my hands started to shake. I tried to focus on the
dank smell of the underground room, but I found it to be slightly more
repulsive than usual. I could only imagine it was due to Karl not having access
to a shower.
Upon seeing us, Karl stood from his cot and
scowled angrily. “Where’s Marcus?” he demanded, eyes falling to the plate in
Nick’s hand. He inhaled deeply, his nose twitching as he recoiled slightly.
“What the hell is going on here?” I could tell by the fleeting expression on
his face that he already knew the answer; I’d swear I even saw a glimmer of
panic in his eyes.
Nick crouched in front of the cell door and
slid the food through the opening at the bottom. Karl looked repulsed as he
eyed the leftovers from last night’s meal with disdain. Slowly, his eyes rose
to Nick’s as Nick backed away from the cage and crossed his arms in front of
him.
I moved forward, but Nick made sure to keep
me partially shielded from Karl’s murderous stare. After a moment of intense
staring, Nick cleared his throat. “I’m here to offer you a choice,” he announced.
Karl remained motionless.
“By Pack Law, I have every right to kill
you,” Nick continued.
“Then do it,” Karl snarled through gritted
teeth, his hands clenching in a way that looked painful.
There was a rumble in Nick’s chest as his
growl started to build, but he held his composure. “You’re not worth my time,”
he said through gritted teeth before pausing. “On the flip side, I could also
hold the key to freedom.”
Karl scoffed. “Freedom. Right.”
Shrugging, Nick leaned against the table in
the center of the room. “Well, as free as you can be with no Pack and never
being allowed to claim territory.” Karl looked angry beyond words, but before
he could say anything, Nick spoke again. “The choice is yours. I’ve dosed your
food with enough silver nitrate to kill you. Eat it and end your miserable
existence, or live out your life, constantly looking over your shoulder and
never being able to call one place home for too long.”
Even though he looked ready to kill both of
us, Karl appeared to be mulling over his options. “So, I could kill myself or
walk out of here today?”
“The choice is yours,” Nick confirmed.
“Not really much of a choice, since being cut
loose is basically social suicide,” Karl reminded Nick.
“You made that bed,” I interjected
impulsively. Nick turned his head and eyed me through his periphery, but didn’t
say anything. Karl did, though.
“Still plenty of room for you in it, too.” He
grinned evilly, glancing at me with eyes that shone with malicious intent.
Nick flew across the room in a flash,
slamming his palms against the bars and rattling the cage until Karl focused on
only him. I smelled his burned flesh before he pulled his hands away and
clenched them at his sides. “If you want to avoid adding a third option to that
list, I suggest you continue to address me.”
Karl’s smile widened; he was pleased with
himself for having gotten under Nick’s skin the way he did.
“Nick,” I spoke up, reaching forward and
grabbing his arm. I tugged gently, but he didn’t move. “He’s been given his
options. Let’s leave him to make his choice.”
Nick leaned forward, lips pulled back in a
sneer. “I’ll give you an hour, asshole.”
I pulled on his arm again, and this time he
budged. Karl’s stare burned into my back the entire time we climbed the stairs,
and once the heavy wooden door was closed, Karl’s maniacal laughter floated up.
It chilled me, but I found comfort in the fact that in sixty minutes, he could
be out of my life for good…
Or, so I hoped.
Nick flopped down on the couch in front of
the flat screen while I paced the floor. I could feel his eyes on me as I moved
back and forth over and over again. “Brooke, honey, sit down.”
“I can’t,” I replied, wringing my hands in
front of me and then running them through my hair. “Sitting down would require
me to be still. Being still typically requires a modicum of calm, and I’m anything
but calm right now.”
Nick sat up and leaned on his thighs as his
eyes followed me. “The choice is out of our hands now. Whatever he
decides—”
“I know.” I stopped walking, but only for a
second before the wolf grew restless again. I could feel it balancing
precariously between feral and human.
Instinctual and
rational.
What was best in this situation? If I blocked out my humanity,
I could probably find peace with Karl’s death if he chose it. But if I thought
rationality, and we let him live, I’d always be on edge, wondering if and when
he’d come after me, probably blaming me for being shut out.
I knew what the wolf wanted—she hadn’t
exactly been subtle about her feelings—and it surprised me to find that
my human side was toeing the line and preparing to cross it. It suddenly craved
a life where I would feel safe and secure, and the wolf exulted in this apparent
breakthrough.
“What do you think he’ll decide?” I asked,
not sure if either answer would put my mind at ease.
Sighing, Nick rested his head on the back of
the couch and looked up at the roof. “Hard to say. Taking your own life is
often viewed as cowardly amongst our kind, and being shunned by your own pack
is a fate worse than death. Going from having a roof over your head and a
family to having absolutely nothing…” He fell silent. “Well, it’s not an easy
choice to make.”
When he looked at me again, he must have
interpreted the look on my face as one of pity for Karl. “Brooke, he
deserves
this.”
I didn’t pity Karl, but after spending some
time within the Pack and getting to know them all, I certainly didn’t envy him
the choice. “I know,” I replied. “I get that, and I understand why things need
to be done this way. It’s just hard for me to fully accept because of what I
am…what I was.”
Nick seemed perplexed for a moment before understanding
crossed his face. “A cop.”
I nodded. “Morally, what we’re doing is so
beyond messed up that I’m having trouble wrapping my head around it, while
instinctually, I’m embracing it. It’s just…it’s a lot to deal with, and I’m
sorry if I made you think I felt anything but contempt for that monster.”
Smiling, Nick stood up and looked down into
my eyes before cupping my face in his large hands. “After today, he won’t even
register on the Pack’s radar.”
I felt the conviction in Nick’s words run
through me, filling my veins with warm comfort and dispelling the ice cold fear
that had previously taken up residence in them. “That’s quite a gift,” I
whispered as he rested his forehead to mine.
“What’s that?”
“You have this way of easing me off the brink
of a nervous breakdown and calming me down. I’d almost forgotten.”
Nick chuckled softly. “Well, I’m glad I could
be of service.” Taking my hand in his, he pulled me toward the couch and we sat
next to each other while we waited for the rest of the hour to play out.
Time dragged on as we sat in silence, so Nick
switched the TV on and flipped through the channels until he found one of those
crime procedural dramas. Even though it was fiction—I mean, come on; it
usually takes much longer than they portray on those shows to solve most of
these crimes—it helped me settle down further. It reminded me of my life
back in Scottsdale while reminding me of what I loved about my time on the
force.
When the credits rolled, Nick shut off the
television, and we went back down to the pit. As we descended the stairs, I was
surprised to hear nothing, and as we neared the bottom, I picked up slow, shallow
breaths…but that was it. I would soon realize why.
There, on the floor of his cell, was Karl.
Face down. The plate was upside down on the floor next to his right hand, a few
bits and pieces of food scattered around it, and he wasn’t moving, save for the
slight rise and fall of his back.
“He did it,” I whispered, disbelief haloing
every word; I honestly thought he’d choose solitude over suicide.
Nick held a hand out to keep me behind him as
we continued forward. “His breathing is shallow,” he confirmed. “It sounds like
he’s struggling, so I doubt it’ll be long now.”
We hung back by the table and waited. I
couldn’t help but watch and listen for the next few minutes until Karl took a
deep, shuddering breath and then fell still. It took a minute before I realized
Nick and I were holding our breath, too.
Slowly, Nick moved toward the cage and
unlocked it, pulling the door open and kneeling next to Karl’s body. As he
reached out to check Karl’s pulse, I stepped into the cage, waiting for
confirmation. What I didn’t expect was for Karl to spring up, throw Nick into
the bars and beat him to the ground where he proceeded to kick him in the chest
and stomach.
“Thought you could force my hand, asshole?”
Karl demanded venomously, landing one more kick to Nick’s ribcage.
I sprang forward without a second thought and
grabbed Karl’s arm to pull him away from Nick. I expected him to be a little
more pliable like he was the other day when I took him on with ease—for
the most part—so it surprised me when he hardly budged, instead turning
just long enough to backhand and shove me hard against the cage bars. My head
hit the bars hard, stunning me. The pain was exponentially amplified due to the
injuries I’d obtained during our last altercation, shooting through my body and
making me dizzy. I slowly slumped to the floor, my vision darkening. Nick’s
groan pulled me from the abyss I was slipping into.
I looked up, everything moving in slow motion
and the edge of my vision foggy and blurred. The heat from the silver bars I
was leaning against seeped through my clothes and irritated my skin, but I
couldn’t move, still too dazed to do anything. I glanced toward Nick to see
blood dripping from his mouth—one of his lungs might have been
punctured—and he appeared too weak to fight back as Karl ignored me and
went back to Nick.