Authors: Virginia Boecker
‘Oh,’ I whisper. I’m surprised at how weak my voice
sounds. ‘Were you out all night, too?’
‘We’ve been looking for you,’ George says. He can’t tear
his eyes away from my stomach, from the blood that drips
onto Humbert’s pristine black-and-white floors. Then he
looks at Fifer, at the sword dangling from her hand. ‘Did
you do that?’
‘Don’t be ridiculous,’ she snaps. We take another step
forward and I stumble. ‘John, help her.’
John steps forward and scoops me up in his arms.
‘Take her to the dining room,’ Humbert instructs. Dimly,
I hear him call out to Bridget. She rushes over, and John
quickly rattles off the things he needs. I don’t really listen.
Can’t he do whatever he needs to do upstairs, so I can sleep?
I’m so tired. I lean my head against his chest and close my
eyes. He smells like outside. Leaves and cold, crisp air.
‘Bring me whatever sewing needles you have, and a spool
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of your strongest thread. No, I don’t care what colour,’ he
adds. He carries me into the dining room, Fifer and George
on his heels.
‘You’re going to sew my dress back together?’ I open one
eye and squint up at him. ‘That’s nice of you.’
‘No. I’m going to sew your skin back together.’
‘What?’ Fifer and I exchange a frantic glance. My injury
is right above my stigma. If John tries to help me, he’ll see
it. I can feel the heat of it blazing into my skin, still trying to
heal me. ‘No. You can’t.’
‘I have to,’ he says.
‘No, you don’t. Just put me down. I’ll be fine.’ I start
struggling in his arms. But the pain is so intense it makes
me gasp.
‘Stop moving,’ he orders. ‘You’re making it worse.’
In the dining room, John lays me on the table, now
covered in a clean white sheet, and then shrugs out of his
heavy black coat. Bridget rushes around, carrying trays of
things and setting them out for him. Fifer and George hover
behind her, identical expressions of fear on their faces.
‘No,’ I say again. ‘You can’t do this.’ I roll to my side, try
to get away from him. But John pins my shoulders to the
table and leans over me. His face is inches from mine.
‘If you don’t let me do this, you will bleed to death,’ he
whispers. ‘Do you understand me?’ I look into his dark eyes
and I can see fear there, lurking just beneath the surface.
And I know he’s telling the truth.
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I let out a shaky breath. ‘Okay. But there’s something I
need to tell you.’
‘Tell me later.’ John grabs a bottle of spirits off the table,
then pulls back the frayed edges of silk from my gory
midsection. ‘This might sting a bit,’ he says. Then he dumps
the clear, cold liquid all over my stomach.
The pain is sharp and penetrating. I stifle a groan, biting
my lip so hard I taste blood. He presses a clean cloth to my
side and begins cleaning away the dirt and blood. Any
second he’s going to see my stigma.
I glance at Fifer. She holds my gaze for a moment, a look
of resignation crossing her face. Then she nods.
‘John.’ She walks forward and touches his sleeve.
‘Fifer, please. Not now.’ He lifts up the cloth.
‘I need to tell you something.’
‘Fifer, I told you—’ He glances at my stomach. Frowns.
Peers in closer. Then he sucks in a sudden, sharp breath. I
don’t need to look to know what he sees: a black XIII scrawled
across my abdomen, burning bright against my pale skin.
John stumbles away from the table, his eyes wide, the
colour draining from his face.
‘That’s a…you’re a…’ He can’t bring himself to say it.
I open my mouth to say something, anything, but
nothing comes out. I start to reach for him, then think
better of it.
‘I’m sorry,’ Fifer says softly. ‘You weren’t supposed
to know.’
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John doesn’t reply.
‘None of us were,’ George adds. ‘It was Nicholas’s order.
Fifer and I only found out by accident.’
John still doesn’t reply. He just stands there, staring
unseeing at the floor in front of him. An interminable
silence passes, and I wonder for a moment if he’s just going
to walk away. Leave the room and let me bleed to death.
‘I know what you’re thinking,’ Fifer says. ‘But she’s not
like the others. She saved my life tonight.’ She quickly
fills them in about our run-in with the guards. ‘If she hadn’t
been there, they would have taken me in. Or killed me.
Or worse.’
I stare at her, shocked by her words, by her defence
of me.
‘And she knows where the tablet is,’ Fifer continues.
‘She does?’ Humbert and George say at once.
George steps up beside me. ‘Where is it?’
‘It’s – ah.’ A bolt of pain shoots through me, making me
gasp. ‘It’s at Blackwell’s.’
‘What?’ Humbert looks stunned. ‘How is that possible?’
I open my mouth again, groan in pain again.
‘She can tell you about it later,’ Fifer says. ‘But she can’t
if she’s dead.’ She looks at John. But he’s looking at me now,
his jaw clenched, a flush of anger colouring his cheeks. Eyes
so dark they’re almost black.
‘Hand me the needle and thread.’
George lets out a small sigh of relief.
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Bridget steps beside John, looking apologetic. ‘I tried to
thread it myself but my hands were shaking too hard. I
don’t take to the sight of blood too well.’ She presses the
needle and thread into his hand, then quickly moves away
from the table, as if I’m going to jump off it and attack her.
John threads the needle without hesitation, as if he’s
done it a thousand times, pulling it through and tying the
ends together in a tight knot. I see the slightest tremor in
his hands. If I hadn’t already seen how steady they can be, I
might not have noticed. Without a word, he picks up the
bottle of spirits again and offers it to me.
I take two huge swallows. The sharp, strong liquid
burns my mouth and throat. I shudder as it hits my empty,
roiling stomach.
John holds the needle up, a long length of thread trailing
behind it. Green. The same shade as the knight in his tomb.
I close my eyes just as the sharp needle penetrates
my flesh.
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My eyes flutter open. John is leaning over me, his palms
spread across the table, his head bowed. I must have passed
out for a moment, but I don’t think he noticed. I can hear
him breathing: long, slow, deep breaths, as if he’s fighting to
control them.
‘I’m sorry,’ I say. My voice weak and hoarse, but I need
to say it. ‘I’m so sorry.’
He jerks his head up. Snatches the spool of thread off the
table, hurls it across the room. It hits the wall and clatters to
the floor. Then he spins on his heel and storms away.
George starts after him, but Fifer grabs his sleeve.
‘Let it go,’ she says. ‘Just – let him be.’
Fifer and George turn to me, and Humbert steps up
beside them. They stand over me, watching me, silent. I feel
vulnerable, lying here like this. My dress in tatters, my
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stomach exposed, my secret exposed. I’m trembling from
cold and fear and loss of blood and a hundred other things
I’m too weary to contemplate. But I need to tell them about
the tablet. I need to tell them I have no idea how I’m going
to destroy it. And I need to tell them about Blackwell.
‘The tablet,’ I start.
‘Is it really at Blackwell’s?’ George says.
I nod.
‘That’s a very serious accusation.’ Humbert frowns.
‘I’ve known Blackwell a long time. He’s capable of some
unpleasant things, certainly. And he certainly has reason to
get rid of Nicholas. But breaking his nephew’s rules to do it,
the rules he himself created…are you absolutely sure?’
‘Yes.’ I take a deep breath – hard to do without making
my stitches hurt – and look at them each in turn. ‘There’s
something else you should know about him, too.’
‘What?’ It’s Fifer who speaks. ‘What is it?’
‘Blackwell is a wizard.’
The words seem to change as they leave my mouth.
They shift and grow into monsters of their own, a hybrid
of fear and truth and horror and lies: reaching, grabbing,
shaking, shrieking. The others, they don’t speak. They
don’t move. They just stand there, allowing themselves
to be devoured.
‘Nicholas… I think he suspected it for a while,’ I
continue. ‘And after what happened at Veda’s, after she told
him what I was, after I told him all the things I’d done, the
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things I did…’ I pause, swallowing back the lump in my
throat. ‘He knew.’
Then I tell them everything.
I tell them about Caleb. About my training, about my
final test at Blackwell’s. How they took us one by one into
the darkness, maybe to live, maybe to die. How Guildford
marched me into the woods and into the tomb, where
Blackwell tried to bury me alive with my own fear.
‘After it was over, after the dirt receded and the tomb
righted itself, it was already morning. I saw the light coming
in through the edges of that door, and I remember thinking
it looked different. That it didn’t look like the same door as
before. It wasn’t wooden at all, but stone. But I didn’t think
it mattered. All that mattered was getting out.’ I take
another breath. ‘Finally, Guildford came and got me. My
eyes were shut. I was still singing. Still curled up in a ball. I
wasn’t in my right mind.’
‘Just like at Veda’s,’ George whispers at last. His eyes are
as round as trenchers. Fifer’s face is vellum pale, and she
goes a long time without blinking.
I nod. ‘As we left, I opened my eyes to take one last look.
I don’t know why. Maybe I wanted to see where I almost
died, maybe I wanted proof I was still alive. But when I
opened my eyes, I saw it. It was the Thirteenth Tablet.’
Fifer sucks in a breath.
‘Of course, I didn’t realise it was the Thirteenth Tablet
until we had the sword and I saw the Green Knight’s tomb.
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I didn’t know you could dispose of curse tablets in tombs,
not until Fifer told me…’ I shiver. ‘But now I know. And if
I’m going to destroy it, I have to go back into the tomb at
Blackwell’s to get it.’
‘How are you going to do that?’ George says. ‘Blackwell
has more protection on his house than is on the king’s.
Guards, gates, a moat, and that’s just to get to the main
entrance. Inside, he’s got archers stationed in towers around
the clock. They don’t fire warning shots.’
Humbert sinks into a chair. He seems to deflate before
my eyes: his face sagging, his posture sagging, the shock
setting in.
‘I thought you were a witch,’ he whispers. It’s a surprise
to hear him speak in anything less than a shout. ‘Nicholas
said you had herbs, and I just assumed…’ He trails off,
shaking his head.
‘I’m sorry,’ I say. ‘No one was supposed to know.
Nicholas thought it was better that way.’
Humbert considers it, then nods. ‘I understand the need
for deception. I should; I live a life of it. Distasteful, perhaps.
But necessary.’
He motions to Bridget. She’s hovering in the doorway,
watching us, eyes wide.
‘Please prepare a bath for Elizabeth, some food and
clean clothing.’ He turns back to me. ‘We need to get
you on the mend. Then we can figure out how to get you
inside Blackwell’s.’
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George helps me to sit, and Fifer wraps a blanket around
my shoulders. We make our way down the hall, up the
stairs, into my room. John is gone, nowhere to be seen. I
saw the look on his face, when he realised what I am. He
probably never wants to set eyes on me again.
After Bridget finishes the bath, she and George excuse
themselves. Fifer helps me undress and I slip into the
hot, fragrant water. And immediately, embarrassingly,
I start to cry.
I’m weak. I’m tired. I’m injured. I’m confused. I’m
ashamed of what I’ve done, afraid of what I’ve got to do.
I am what I always feared I’d be: alone. I’m going into that
tomb alone; I’m going to die alone. This is what Nicholas
knew, what he didn’t want to tell me. He didn’t have to.
Because deep down, I knew it, too.
‘You’re not going to die,’ Fifer says quietly. She’s kneeling
next to the bathtub, her hands gripping the edges. Watching
me. ‘I know that’s what you think. But you aren’t. I’ve read
the prophecy a thousand times. It sounds bad – I know that.
But you aren’t going to die.’