Witch Glitch: Magic and Mayhem Book Two (16 page)

"That's Shifter Wanker," I ground out.

"My bad," he said biting his lip to suppress his grin.

I was tempted to blow up part of the porch—the part that would land on his head. He was supposed to be on my side, especially if he wanted in my pants. What was happening here?

"He's four," I snapped.

"He's an alpha," Mac countered.

The plethora of Shifters in my yard went silent and watched the unfolding drama between the witch and the wolf.

"You would risk a child's life? A child from your kingdom?"

"I wouldn't risk any of my people's lives," Mac said coolly. "Ever."

"Not having puppies with you," I muttered under my breath.

The next thing I knew the wolf was in my personal space, I was trapped against his hard body and his lips were at my ear.

"Do not judge things you don't understand, Zelda. You are young and inexperienced. Trust me on this. I don't want our people to see us at odds. It will not be helpful," he whispered.

A chill of desire and a shudder of fury skittered through my body. I was torn and I didn't like Mac one little bit at the moment. My attraction to him infuriated me. I was a dummy. I knew he was right about hiding the dissenting opinions, but I couldn't cave where Bo was concerned—alpha Shifter or not.

"No, I won't allow it," I informed him loud enough to be heard.

The gasps from the crowd made me uneasy and the power radiating off the man I was challenging didn't bode well. Mac was a force that any sane person wouldn't reckon with. I was clearly insane.

"I can't heal a dead person," I argued to the Shifters and ignored the sexy assbucket who had attached himself to me. "He’s just a little boy."

Wanda and Simon carefully approached with Hildy floating above. I pushed Mac away—actually I was fairly sure he let me. It was as if everyone was against me and I hated that feeling.

A big part of me wanted to throw my hands in the air and say "fuck all of you" then leave. I really wanted to do that. But I was supposed to watch over these imbeciles. They were making it very hard.

"Zelda," Hildy explained. "Mac is right. Shifters are not like us. They're people, but they're also animals. Their instincts and gifts are very different from ours. Bo will not be alone, but he's the only one who can scent the honey badger. The longer we wait, the more danger we're in."

Wanda took my hands in hers. "He's my son. It humbles me you feel so strongly about him, but what has been said is true. Bo is powerful and will be protected."

"I know this seems odd to you," Simon said kindly. "But this is the way it is for us."

"Who will protect him?" I demanded.

"I will," Chuck said as he stepped forward from the crowd. "Not a hair on his head will be harmed."

"You'll protect him?" I asked doubtfully.

"With my life," Chuck promised.

"Well that certainly doesn't help." I laughed and the crowd backed further away. The sparks now covered the entire top half of my body. "You've been trying to end your life for weeks."

Chuck bowed his head and stayed silent.

"Look, I'm sorry, but you have," I told him.

"This is true, but my duty to my people comes before my desire to be with my mate."

"He's your mate?" I asked Hildy, totally surprised as I tamped my magic down.

She nodded and hovered above Chuck.

"He bit you?" I asked.

Hildy nodded again and winked.

"Did it hurt?" I asked much to the amusement of the town witnessing me and my filter-less mouth.

"Just the opposite," she said with an enormous grin.

I felt Mac at my back and moved away. It didn't matter if was orgasmically awesome. It didn't matter if it tickled. It wasn't going to happen for me. Not with Mac. Not with anyone. I was leaving. I would fight with everything I had and then disappear.

Too many feelings were fucking with my chi.

I'd miss Assjacket and its inhabitants, but I'd get over it. I always did.

And the truth was they'd be better off without me. So if this was the way they wanted to do it, who was I to stop them? They'd do it with me or without me.

"We can't do it without you," Mac said as he again moved into my personal space. "It's not possible."

Again I moved away. "Fine… and get out of my head," I said. The Shifters heaved a collective sigh of relief. "We'll do it your way, but as soon as we find the badger, I want Bo moved to safety."

"That's a given," Mac said.

I refused to make eye contact with him. His eyes spoke more than his mouth and I was concerned he heard all of what I'd just thought. Tough shit. If he was rude enough to crawl into my head, he'd just have to deal with what he heard.

"Alright," I said. "I want all the strongest fighters to gather in groups of five. Once we know the location, we'll have the groups surround the area and we'll go in together."

"Hey, I suck at scrying," Sassy yelled as she pushed her way through the crowd.

Daaaaad followed behind her looking like he wanted to pull his hair out. Sassy was good like that.

"No worries," I said. "We have a change of plans. You and Daaaaad will be coming with me. We might need to combine magic if we have to deal with a vamp. Where are the cats?"

"Eating," she snorted.

"Of course they are," I said with a disgusted shake of my head. If they were going to live here, they were going on a diet.

"Combining your power won't work," Hildy fretted. "Magic won't kill a vampire. Magic doesn't work on the already dead."

"What kills them?" I asked, afraid of the answer.

"Removing their head or staking their heart with silver," Daaaaad supplied gravely.

"I can remove a head with magic," I said as the bile rose in my throat.

I was a fucking healer—not a killer. This was against everything that I believed in. However, I could and would do it if my people were in danger.

"It must be done with bare hands or teeth," Wanda explained with a grimace.

"Alrighty then," I choked out. "I'm not your man."

"I'm your man," Mac said tersely.

The double entendre was not lost on me, but I ignored it. He could not be my man. He was too good for somebody like me.

"The blood will kill you," Daaaaad warned. "Even a drop will destroy you."

"I thought you didn't like him," I interrupted.

"I never said I didn't
like
him," Daaaaad replied in his defense. "I just don't like him with you."

"Got ya," I said with a nod.

Mac growled and my Daaaaad grinned.

"The blood won't kill Mac," Little Bo said reverently as he took his mom's hand and giggled. "Mac has more magic than anyone I know—super powers."

All the Shifters dropped to their knees and bowed their heads in respect. I turned and stared at the man who I secretly adored.

"Who are you?" I asked.

"Besides yours, I suppose you could call me a freak of nature," he said evenly.

"Hey," Sassy said in her outdoor voice even though she was a foot away. "Is my man Jeeves here?"

The Shifters glanced around nervously. Apparently they'd heard about Sassy's new fictional relationship and were terrified for poor Jeeves.

"Yes, I'm here," Jeeves shouted from the back of the crowd. "Does someone require servicing?"

"Oh shit," I muttered as Sassy squealed with glee.

"I do," she sang out as Jeeves emerged from the group. "Oh my Goddess, you're hot!"

I was unsure if she was seeing the same thing I was. Jeeves was far from hot. He was a hot mess. However, Jeeves was struck dumb as he bounced and stared at Sassy with undisguised lust.

"What the hell?" Mac muttered as Sassy grabbed Jeeves by the collar of his ill-fitted tux and laid a big wet one on him.

The Shifters clapped politely and looked confused.

"Looks like you've gained a daughter-in-law." I laughed at the look of horror on Mac's face.

"Looks like you have too," he shot back with a smirk.

I shrugged. I wasn't staying. Although the new turn of events was enough to make me leave alone. There wasn't enough money in the world to make me become related to Sassy—even by marriage.

Mac watched me with narrowed eyes and thin lips. When I stayed mute, he took over.

"The badger won't be out until after sundown. That gives us about eight hours to prepare," Mac directed. "Go to your tents and rest. I want everyone to eat and sleep. This is going to be a long night."

"Why not go after him while he's sleeping?" Simon raised his hand and asked.

"Because we need him to lead us to the syringe and ultimately to my mother," I said.

"Your mother?" Wanda asked with concern.

"I'll get them up to speed while Jeeves gives me a back rub that will lead to some afternoon delight," Sassy stated very seriously. "You go rest, boss lady."

"Mmmkay," I said warily. I wondered what Sassy's version would include and decided to block out the afternoon delight part.

"Oh and you were right. The spring water fountain rocks!"

I swallowed the burst of laughter that threatened to escape my lips and headed quickly for the house.

"What are you going to do, your Majesty?" a Shifter shouted out.

"I'm going to have a nap with my mate," he replied.

That stopped me dead. "I am
not
your mate," I hissed and slapped my now fire shooting hands on my hips. "And I am not sleeping with you."

"Who said anything about sleeping?" Mac inquired with a lopsided grin as all the Shifters hooted and hollered.

"I can smite all of you," I threatened, but they just laughed and kept cheering.

I'd take Mac to my room and let him have it. If he thought it was going to be pleasurable, he had another thing coming. He was dealing with a pissed off witch.

If he was smart, he'd run.

Mac scooped me up in his arms and marched toward the house.

Apparently, he was not smart.

Chapter 15

"You're smoking crack if you think you're going to get any, douchenozzle," I informed the idiot as he dumped me on my bed and began removing his clothes.

Silently and with a half smile, Mac continued until he was in his birthday suit. I stared at the ceiling. He was not fighting fair. His naked body sent my entire lower half into a tizzy.

"Cover your Bon Jovi or I'll zap him off," I threatened as I scrunched my eyes shut and put my hands over them for good measure. The visuals were far too tempting.

One side of the bed depressed and I rolled to the middle as Mac and his huge bare-naked frame made himself comfortable next to me. His scent alone was dangerous, but I knew if I opened my eyes I was done for.

"We're not having sex," I snapped as I tried to roll away.

He was quick and pinned me beneath him.

"Why?" he asked as he buried his face in my neck and nipped.

"Because I don't like you," I replied breathlessly as my girly parts began to take over my brain.

"But I like you," he said as he pressed his rock hard Jon Bon Jovi into my hip. "I like you a whole bunch."

"Liking me and wanting in my pants are two entirely different things," I said as I attempted to wiggle free.

"Not for me," he said.

I stayed silent and digested that one.

"Zelda, tell me why you're mad."

"Because," I said.

"Not an answer," he murmured as his fingers deftly unbuttoned my shirt. "And if you really want me to, I'll stop."

I didn't want him to stop. I wanted to open my eyes and take in his beauty. I wanted his arms around me and his strong body inside mine. I wanted him as much as I wanted my next breath. But I was mad.

"You undermined me. You went over my head in front of everyone. I thought we were working as a team."

"We are." Mac sat up and pulled my hands from my eyes. "If I started chanting spells and trying my hand at magic, what would you do?" he asked.

"Um… laugh?" I offered as I sat up too.

"Why?"

"Because you wouldn't know what you were doing. You could hurt yourself or someone else. Magic is some serious shit," I told him. I was hoping he wasn't going to give it a try just to prove a point I already got, but wasn't willing to concede.

"I didn't laugh at you," he stated.