Winter's Path: (A Seasmoke Friends Novel) (18 page)

With a quiet exhale, she looked at me. “Thinking about time wasted, I guess.” Her lips pressed together. “I know why you made the choices you did after Cara died, understand them even, but I feel like I pushed you into this. I think...” Her lashes fluttered closed. “I think I could handle just about anything except being another of your regrets.”

Christ. She went right for the arterial artery, didn’t she?

I pulled her on top of me and held her chin. “Yes, you pushed me. You always do. That’s how you operate, Jenny. All systems go. I see it more like encouragement than a shove. But hear me loud and clear. I do not, nor will I ever, regret being with you.”

Though she nodded, her gaze swept my face like she was seeking the truth. It was insulting and hurtful she thought I’d lie to her.

“Look at me.” When she did, I knew I was taking the biggest leap of my life. And let’s face it, I wasn’t a gambling man. “I don’t want just something physical with you. If we do this, we do it right. But I want to take it slow, keep it just between us for now. No outside influences, especially our friends and family. There’s a lot at stake here, and your friendship means more to me than anything.”

Hell, she meant more to me than air. This thing could go south, and the very idea of losing her stopped my heart. And she hadn’t responded.

“Jenny?”

“Yes.” She cleared her throat and something in the vicinity of hurt clouded her eyes. “Yes, that’s okay with me.”

Lifting my head, I kissed her. Long, languid strokes that built to a sucker-punch in my gut. Soft, pliant, she met my intensity. Her warm body over mine shifted, and skin brushed skin. I traced her curves with my hands, up her sides, down her back, settling on her ass and sinking in my fingers.

She kissed my jaw, my throat, and her hands did their own exploration. I closed my eyes, letting her touch and build, every second driving me straight to madness. Fingernails scratched my nipples, lightly raked my abs. She started kissing lower and I flipped her beneath me. I hadn’t spent any time worshipping her body the first time. I was going to make up for that now. So many sweet, warm places to explore.

I kissed her mouth, loving how her hands went right into my hair to hold me to her. When her muscles went liquid, I licked and sucked my way over every inch of her skin. Fingers, neck, those damn wonderfully small breasts. Her chest rose and fell, her gaze watching me as I made my way over her taut belly. I descended, and her pupils expanded.

Christ, yes. There was nothing more arousing than her responsiveness. I ached I was so hard, but I needed to taste her, watch her come again. I closed my lips around her nub, and she arched, head back, a moan in her throat. Complete abandon.

Resisting the need to stroke my own throbbing, I focused on her. Worked her with my teeth and tongue and fingers. Every breath and needy noise from her lips wrapped around me, held me captive. And when she exploded, I almost blew, too. Arms over her head, her whole body tensed, trembled. The goddamn most beautiful thing I’d witnessed.

While she was coming down, I nuzzled an assent, and she cradled me between her thighs. I dropped my forehead to hers and waited for her heavy lids to lift. “Protection or without?” I trusted her explicably. The decision was hers.

In answer, she adjusted her hips, taking me deep.

Holy...Christ...and all the saints.

Face buried in her neck, I couldn’t move to save my life. Shaking with restraint, I breathed through the exquisite torture that was her tight, wet heat. She wrapped her legs around my waist, shifting me—didn’t know that was possible—even deeper.

I groaned. “Need a moment, darlin’.”

She clenched her walls around me, and stars exploded behind my lids.

“Playing with fire, Jenny,” I choked. And I had the suspicion I’d be the one singed.

I could all but hear her smiling. She trailed her fingers down my back and grabbed my ass. Her bite on my shoulder was the tether snapping.

Caging her face between my forearms, I pressed my palms to the headboard. And thrust. Kissing her hard, I stroked her tongue with mine, mimicking the motion of the dance our bodies were doing. Mating. Taking. Seeking. It wasn’t fast and it wasn’t rough, but desperation clung to her every mewl and my every grunt.

I didn’t think I’d make it, hold out, but she bowed...cried out...locked me in a vise. And with a “Thank you, Jesus,” I followed.

Jenny

I
awoke slowly to a man’s hot skin flush against my back and arms banded around me. It took me a moment to orientate, but Matt’s familiar scent sifted through my sleepy haze. One of his thighs was wedged between mine, his fingers splayed between my breasts. He snored lightly, face buried in my hair.

Smiling, I was unable to fight the giddy bubble of happy. After years of wanting him, we’d finally connected. The first time had been quick and explosive, the second just as desperate, but with more finesse. Yet even through the passion, he’d taken measures to ensure I not only joined him, but that he was careful. Subtle moves I doubt he even realized, like putting his forearm between my back and the wall so I didn’t bruise while he’d thrust, or keeping his hands on the headboard so I didn’t drift too far and smack my head while he’d taken me in bed. Being with him had been better than I’d dreamed about, and I’d thought about having him this way a lot.

Yawning, I glanced at the nightstand and noted it was only eight. He’d gotten up sometime in the night because the drapes over the balcony doors were open. Through the rain-splattered glass, sunlight eked past a light cloud cover and spilled into the room. I had to visit Grampy today and check on the storm damage at the tavern, but it was early.

Snuggling his arm I’d used as a pillow, I recanted the night before like my favorite movie. Sex had never been like that before. Besides Ian, none of my lovers had been quite so thorough. In fact, most of the time I hadn’t gotten off. There was an emotional connection to Matt that, no doubt, had shifted the act from sex to wow. Plus, he was very good, despite other factors. His body knew how to elicit pleasure from mine. One touch and I was in orbit. He made love like his personality—comprehensive, focused, and unselfish. Driven, emotional, and compassionate. Even the first time, when his control had been close to snapping, I was the center of his attention.

And our conversation between rounds made me frown. We’d hashed a lot out last night. For me, learning about Cara had been an eye-opener. It put quite a few puzzle pieces in place. On his end, he now knew what I’d wanted all along. He seemed to want me, as well. So much time wasted. Funny how we could tell each other every frickin’ thing, but when it came to romance, we’d both locked down. For the sake of friendship and the avoidance of rejection, we’d both been cowards. Last night changed that.

He wanted a relationship. With me.

Except...he didn’t want anyone else to know. It wasn’t that I didn’t understand his reasoning. I did, and he wasn’t altogether wrong. Yet, I couldn’t help but feel like a... Hell. Like a dirty secret.

He stirred behind me and kissed my neck. “You smell so damn good.” Gah. His rough, just-waking voice created a full-body shiver.

Smiling, I glanced over my shoulder at his bedhead and heavy lids. I turned in his arms, offering a quick kiss. “Good morning.”

“Yes, it is.” His hand roamed down my back and stopped to cup my ass. His erection pressed against my belly. “A very good morning.” He nuzzled my neck, the scruff on his jaw scratching my skin. “Dreamed about you last night.”

As this was said between my breasts, I wasn’t sure if he meant me or my girls. I laughed. “Tell me all about it.” I wove my fingers through his thick, soft hair, encouraging him. Criminy, the things he could do with his mouth.

He rolled to his back, taking me with him so I lay across his chest. “I’d rather show you.”

Holding the back of my neck, he brought my mouth to his in a searing, slow kiss that fried my gray matter. His thumbs circled my nipples while he nipped my lower lip and trailed kisses down my throat.

I moaned. “So it was a good dream.”

“Yes,” he said through a groan. “A very, very good dream.”

His hands shifted to my waist, my thighs, where he spread them, forcing me to straddle him. His erection rubbed along my wet folds and my breath caught. I loved so many things about him, but his dick had to be close to the top of the list. Long and veined, he wasn’t so thick he’d stretch me painfully, but he had size enough to fill me completely. Soft velvet over hard steel.

Because I’d wanted to touch him last night and he’d stopped me, I played now. Trailing my fingers over the yummy dips in his rigid abs, I grinned against his lips when he sucked in air and his stomach concaved. I wrapped my fingers around his length and stroked.

His eyed slammed closed. “Have mercy, Jenny.”

Not a chance. I sucked one of his nipples into my mouth, enjoying when the flat disc pebbled on my tongue. He shoved his fingers in my hair, panting. I moved to the other nipple and squeezed him in my hand. His hips jerked. His chest rumbled. At a snail’s pace, I stroked him, base to tip, drawing out the pleasure rippling off him. I circled his tip, his slit, and his breathing ceased.

“Killing me, darlin’. Not that I mind.” He opened his eyes, pinning me with a gaze so drenched in lust I was soaked between my thighs.

“Is this how your dream went?” I stroked him again, just as slowly, and with more pressure.

His Adam’s apple bobbed a swallow. “I can’t remember. Can’t remember my name, actually.”

Grinning, I kissed him and sighed against his mouth. “How about you close your eyes and I’ll give you a new dream.”

“Jenny—“ He choked on the rest of his sentence as my lips wrapped around his swollen dick. Shaking hands fisted my strands and I peeked up at him through my lashes. He seemed to be having difficulty with air exchange. “You feel...so damn good.”

Praising him, I took him deeper and hummed. He muttered a string of curses and threw his head back. Gently, he thrust into my mouth as if unsure. I let him set the pace for a moment before pressing on his hip to hold him down. My other hand cupped his balls and he hastily lifted his head to watch me. Hazel eyes burned me with shared desire. He spread his thighs to give me more room, and the fingers in my hair clenched.

I went at him, working him until his breaths soughed and I sensed he was close, then I released him and crawled up his leanly muscled body. He trekked my every shift with hungry eyes. When I rose over him, his tip nudging my opening, we both trembled.

He grabbed my hips. “I like this dream.”

“You’re about to love it.” Bracing my hands on his chest, I sank onto him until he was rooted deep. I threw my head back as he groaned, long and loud.

With the ends of my hair brushing his thighs, I ground my hips, setting a smooth, easy pace to torment him as much as myself. He rose up to meet me as I bore down, and the rhythm was breathtaking. Beautiful in the way we moved together. Every glide of him against my sensitive walls brought me closer and closer to breakage. He had my trust, my heart, and my body in his hands. I’d never been this vulnerable, and the scary edge of nerves only added to the intensity.

As if sensing my mood, he sat up, arms around my back. One hand held my neck, the other low on my spine, encouraging the roll of my hips as I took him. Open-mouth kisses fanned my neck, up to my lips, where we shared air.

“Come, darlin’,” he whispered against my cheek. “Let me feel you.” He pistoned faster, his pubic bone grinding my clit and sending me so, so near to bliss. He made strangled, desperate noises, his eyes watching me. “That’s right,” he coaxed, his voice gravel. “Right there. Your eyes go from aged whiskey to chocolate when you’re close.”

I wasn’t much for talking during sex, but damn if his words didn’t trip my pulse and have my body begging. Struggling to hold off, I wanted to bask in this moment. Me in his arms, sinking into his eyes, us wrapped up together in a knot of need. My fingers sunk deeper into his scalp to hold onto something. His warm breath fanned my skin, our chests bumping as we rocked.

“Yes.” His hand slid from my neck to my throat, his thumb stroking the underside of my jaw. “That’s it, darlin’.” His brow wrinkled, his gaze just this side of oblivion. “Take me. Take from me.”

God, yes. Full body tremors stole my breath, bowed my spine. Lightning pinged from my belly, sizzling my nerve endings. It went on forever, my orgasm. Held me in its grip like a form of torture. Matt followed, roaring an oath against my mouth, his muscles vibrating under my hands. He thrust twice more, hard, insistent, and then went rigid as he spilled inside me.