Wicked Forest (31 page)

"Some of the people who live here in Palm Beach believe they are royalty, and some really are related to royal families in Europe." Mother told her.

After we showed her about. I took her to her room so she could rest and dress for dinner. when. I hoped. Linden would appear to be introduced.

Thatcher was in court but had promised to be back in time.

"
Obrigado,
Willow," Amou said.

"No. I am the one who should thank you.

Amou. Thank you for making this trip and being here for me, to stand beside my mother and be part of my family."

She smiled softly.

'Seu pal
described her to me, not in detail, but just as a beautiful woman, someone who had put music and light back into his life. That's what he said,

'She is the woman who gave meaning to the word
angelic,
' he said. When he spoke of her, he had tears in his eyes."

"Thank you for telling me that. Amou, Rest," I said, and kissed her softly.

My heart was so full. I thought I would explode with happiness.

To my joyful surprise. Linden came down to dinner. He had dressed well for it and brushed his hair, and even participated in conversation, asking Amou questions about me as a young airl, some of the answers embarrassing.

After they were introduced_. Thatcher couldn't wait to tease her about the dreads,

"To this day she worries about them." he joked.

"Stop it," I warned him, and glared at him with hot eyes.

"No, no, it's all right," Amou said. She gave Thatcher one of her famous intense looks— famous, at least, to me. "May you always be able to make fun of the dreads." she told him after a long moment.

He held his smile, but it was as if a prophet had spoken, and he couldn't wait to change the topic and talk about his mother's newest idea for the wedding.

Afterward, he confessed that Amon was more than he had expected.

"She's nobody's fool, wise and very sensitive.

You were lucky to have had her," he told me. "Why, she even got Linden behaving like a normal person:"

"She's always been magical for me."

"Maybe we'll take a trip to Brazil next year and visit her," he said.

"Oh, will we?"

"What's to stop us? Just your work schedule or mint, and we can find a way around that, most of the time," he promised.

That night, my heart so full of joy, we made the most gentle and yet passionate love we had yet. We fell asleep clinging to each other as if we were both afraid sleep would take us too far away.

.

The next morning. Aunt Agnes and Cousin

Margaret Selby arrived. Aunt Agnes was astounded when she saw Amou and couldn't believe she had come all the way from Brazil to attend my wedding.

She was cordial to Mother, but anyone could tell from the way she spoke to her and looked at her that she could never be very close or very friendly to Mother.

The only reference she made to my father was a confession of surprise.

All my life I thought of my brother as the most correct, proper man I knew. He was even serious as a little boy, so concerned at how he looked to people, he would wipe his mouth with his napkin practically after every bite at dinner. To think of Claude having an affair with a patient!

"On the other hand. I suppose I should be grateful," she said with as plastic a smile as I had seen her wear. "After all, if it wasn't for you, we wouldn't have Willow, now would we?"

Mother took no offense at anything Aunt Agnes said. Afterward, she whispered to me and revealed that my father had "described your aunt to a T."

When Bunny arrived, she and my aunt took to each other immediately, siding with each other at every opportunity. That, too, brought smiles to Mother's and my faces. Amou couldn't be idle and went into the kitchen to prepare one of her Portuguese chicken dishes with piri-piri sauce, a hot sauce so delicious that everyone raved about it.

Margaret followed me about all day. She

explained at least a half dozen times why her husband was unable to attend my wedding. Pressing business concerns kept him from leaving Savannah. From the way she spoke of him and their marriage, it seemed that he devoted 90 percent of his time to his work and 10 percent to her, but she didn't seem to mind. She went on and on about her social activities, her charity functions, her full life, which to me sounded like a life full of activities designed to avoid facing reality.

Margaret was intrigued with Linden, who didn't give her a moment of attention. however.

"Is he dangerous?" she asked in a whisper.

"Only if you pester him," I said. She believed me and kept her distance.

To keep her occupied and get her out of my shadow, I introduced her to the Butterworth twins and later to most of the Club d'Amour. She got along well with all of them. although I thought Manon and her group were really humoring and toying with her most of the time.

With all my last-minute preparations, I had no time to be concerned anyway. Both Mother and Amou hovered around me. Bunny had asked to be called to my last gown fitting. but I conveniently forgot, imagining that she would find fault with something simply because we hadn't taken her advice and used the people she wanted me to use.

Thatcher had decided that he would spend the night away. He told me he was going to sleep at the beach house and that his friend. Addison Steele, had, as promised, flown in from his home in Paris to attend our wedding.

"Since we spent so many wonderful nights there." Thatcher told me. "I think it's only fitting I sleep there the night before our wedding.‖

I was too nervous to care or even to listen to half the things he was telling me. For someone who had avoided the wedding altar as if it were the guillotine, he, on the other hand, seemed very cool and collected.

When we kissed good night. I asked him why he wasn't at least as nervous as I was. He paused to consider, then shook his head and shrugged.

"I think because it still feels like it's happening to someone else. But soon enough, the reality will strike home and then you'll hear my knees knock," he promised, kissed me on the tip of my nose, and left.

An hour or so later. I had a phone call from Mr.

Bassinger, who had just arrived in Palm Beach and was calling from his hotel.

"I must apologize, Willow. I was away from the office on a business trip, and my wife and I had arranged to fly directly here for your wedding. Only an hour ago, they faxed me your documents. and I've just completed reviewing this prenuptial. The only thing that seems out of the ordinary is Thatcher's working himself into your property because of some agreement you and he made about the upkeep. Is that correct? He's paying for that?"

"Yes. Since we're making this our home."

'That's fine, But the way this is written, it's the same as him levying a lien. Do you want me to get into it and have the wording revised? There are a few other minor things I would change."

I thought for a moment,

"No," I said. "I'm sorry I bothered you with it I don't even want to think about it, especially tonight."

"I can understand. These things are usually done a lot more in advance. We can revisit it later, if you like," he added softly,

"Good."

"We're so looking forward to your wedding and seeing you."

"Thank you. I'm looking forward to seeing you." I told him. I was, because he had been one of my father's closest confidants, and having him there was having a little more of my father. too.

"Well, rest up," he said, and hung up.

I thought about his comments for a few

moments, then drove them out of my head with a vigorous shake and denial. I would let nothing do what my mother had warned this could do. I would let nothing diminish the glow of our candles.

Not tonight.

Not ever.

Not if I could help it.

Do you think you are being realistic, Willow?

Daddy would surely ask.

Must we always? You weren't realistic all the time, Daddy. Especially -when you fell in love with my mother.

Was I right to be that way?

Yes. Yes! I screamed back at him.

He popped out of my mind like a soap bubble and left me staring at myself in the mirror.

Wondering.

13

A Most Wonderful Wedding

.

How do you sleep the flight before your

wedding-? I wondered when it came time to do so. I had periodic feelings of numbness alternating with an electric sensitivity at my nerve endings that made me jump and flinch and have shortness of breath every time I brushed against something or stopped and let myself dwell on the ceremony and reception. I don't know how many times I looked at my wedding dress, my shots, my veil, questioning whether I had made the right decision or whether I should have listened to Bunny.

Stop this, Willow De Beers
, I told myself.
Stop
this second guessing.

However, with Bunny Eaton still hovering

about the property and the sounds of men and women below setting up the tables and the decorations, I couldn't imagine closing my eyes. I was certainly not going to take any sleeping pills. All I needed was to wake up groggy on my wedding day.

I had just changed into my nightgown and

pulled back the blanket to crawl into bed when I heard a knock on my door. Thinking it was Mother. I went and opened it quickly and found Margaret Selby in her robe and slippers.

"What's wrong?" I asked. "Oh, nothing. I just remember what it was like for me the night before my wedding and thought I would stop by to see you. I'm sure your stomach is full of pins and needles. Mine was."

"Yes," I said. "but I'm going to try to get some sleep.‖

"Oh, you won't." she said with a wave of her hand, and marched into my room. "This is such a magnificent house and property. I can tell you.

Mother was very impressed and is still babbling about it. She had no idea. What sort of a home could a mother who had been in Uncle Claude's mental clinic possibly have, she would ask all the time."

"Well, now she knows."

"Yes, and your mother is so lovely. I don't see how anyone could tell she was mentally ill."

"She was helped many, many years ago.

Margaret. She hasn't had those sorts of problems for a long time. It's not something you see in someone's face forever."

"I know." she declared, and looked at my wedding dress. "Your dress is much prettier than mine was. Ashley's mother really was the one who picked out my dress. She and Mother, that is. They both thought the dress I wanted was inappropriate because it showed a little more bosom than they thought was proper. Imagine. Like it's against the law to look sexy at your own wedding or something. How about all those people who are seven or eight or even nine months pregnant at their weddings? No one seems to complain about that. And they wear white, too!

"At least I was really and truly a virgin when I got married in white. I bet you're not, are you?" she asked, after a moment of building some courage.

"Times have changed. Margaret. That's not something on everyone's mind at the moment."

"I just didn't think I should give myself to any man unless he was going to be my husband and give himself completely to me." she declared with a bit of a pout.

"Your virginity is your most precious gift, your jewel, and you can't cheapen it by giving it to just anyone. And besides, later, when your husband makes love to you, he'll feel you're like a used car."

"Who told you that?" I asked, fighting not to break out in laughter.

-"Mother and I have discussed it many times,'

she said with big eyes.

"I don't think all men feel that way. Margaret.

This isn't some very restricted society in which women are treated like second-class citizens. If it's all right for men to be lovers, why shouldn't it be for women?"

"We're different.,"

"That's for sure. Margaret, but we're not less.‖

"Well..." She looked down and then up with an impish smile smeared like hot butter across her chubby face. "I almost did it with someone else once."

she confessed in a loud whisper. "I came this close."

She pinched her thumb and forefinger together. 'I was only sixteen and Randy Karlan had me pinned down in the backseat of his Lincoln Town Car, so there was lots of room, and he pulled down my panties and pushed his thing against me. He called it 'knocking on the door' and made me say. 'Who's there?' He said.

'Open.' and I had to say. 'Open who?' And he said.

'Open sesame.' and pushed until it almost happened.

only I kept thinking about what Mother had told me and I screamed and turned so quickly and forcefully. I spilled him off me and he got very angry. He said he would tell everyone he had done it anyway. I cried, and he made a deal with me. I have never told anyone else about it."

"What was the deal?"

"I had to relieve his agony, he said. Men suffer so much more because of sex, don't they?" she asked me. and I shook my head and smiled,

"What do you mean? Why?"

"I don't know. They get like a bomb or something and if you don't help them explode, they could explode inside, I suppose.

Ashley told me that. He said men need more attention than women and need to pretend things more."

"Pretend? Like what?"

"On our honeymoon, he made me sit on him and bounce and recite. 'Jack be nimble. Jack be quick.

Jack went over the candlestick' over and over until he screamed. And now that's the way we do it all the time. Sometimes I recite it twenty times, sometimes as high as fifty, and once less than ten times. Do you do things like that with Thatcher?"

"No, Margaret," I said. "And if I did. I wouldn't tell you."

'I just do what I have to do to make my husband a happy man so we can have a happy marriage."

'Do you have a happy marriage?' I asked,

"Yes," she said quickly and firmly.

"Then that works for you, Margaret. and I'm happy for your happiness."

She nodded and rose, walking slowly toward the door.

All through the night before my wedding. I thought only about the honeymoon night. I was so afraid I wouldn't be good and Ashley would hate me."